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suz

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About suz

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    Salisbury Hill
  • Birthday 08/01/1984

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  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Berkshire
  1. Hi I've noticed that there are a lot of posts around here regarding the use of Risperidone as a treatment for children with ASD's, I was just curious whether anyone uses this as a treatment for themselves as an adult, or knows anybody who does? I have been taking it as a treatment for personality disorder for quite a few years, but am now looking into the possiblity that I may have AS and wondered if Risperidone is used for ASD's in adulthood, or if it's just in children? Any info or advice much appreciated... thanx! Suz
  2. Hi Ultimatus, and welcome. I joined this forum a couple of months ago, I'm undiagnosed but think I may have aspergers and can relate to a lot of what you've described. I was terrified of lorries as a child because they seemed painfully loud, and also hated fireworks - still do if I'm honest! I was also bullied in school for being really quiet and was completely obsessed with doing my classwork and homework to the point of perfection, which other kids found very strange! I live on the Surrey/Berkshire border and would be very interested to know what you find out about getting diagnosed in Surrey or surrounding areas. Where abouts in Surrey are you? Keep me posted... Suz (And I'm also 25!)
  3. Hi eveyone I haven't posted for ages so apologies for that - I joined in Feb and spent a couple fo weeks on the forum every day and then haven't been back since! A bit of a tendancy of mine I suppose, to go from one short-lived obsession the the next! Anyway, without wanting to depress anyone I was hoping for a bit of advice and support. Basically I'm really low and very confused at the moment and just don't know which way to turn. I'm undiagnosed but think I may have aspergers, although my mind tends to change depending on my mood. That's basically half the problem in itself though. I have very little sense of identity - I don't really know where I fit in, who I am or what I want out of life. My mum tries to help me with this to the point that I feel completely trapped at home with her, but although I'm desperate to escape I'm not sure I could cope living away from her. I don't work or anything and have a mental health social worker as I have sufferred from depression and anxiety since my early teens (I'm 24 now). But my social worker has different views to my Mum and is keen for me to become independant - get a job, my own place, basically become more 'normal'. That's what I want too deep down, but I have no confidence and no idea what I would do as a job, or how to live independantly or anything. I've also read self-help books and stuff but they make little sense to me and all seem to say different things. Everyone seems to have different opinions of how I should 'sort my life out', and I'm just so confused now that I'm so depressed I don't look after myself properley, and barely leave the house and stuff. I just wish I knew who I am and where I belong, but then I don't think I've ever really fitted in anywhere. i've never really had any friends - people seem to think I'm weird, and I don't know how to get close to people anyway. This world just seems like such a frightening place - everyone is always telling me I've got my head in the clouds and I've got to start living in the real world, but I don't really know what that means. Really sorry to go on, hope I haven't depressed anyone, I guess I'm just getting desperate now. I was basically wondering whether anyone else has ever felt this way, and whether this might seem like an aspie thing or if I'm just going crazy. If any one has any advice, been in this situation or know someone who has, please do reply. Thanks so much. Suz
  4. I have dislocated each knee twice... I have never done anything about it! Suz
  5. Got to level 3 and scored 10 on my first go - not bad, but then I've got no-one to compare myself to yet!! Suz
  6. Hi Thanks diane and something different for the replies - and the much needed hugs! <'> I think writing a letter could be a very good idea. I think I am often quick to blame myself when something like this happens, I guess because this sort of thing seems to happen so often in my life. My friend and I are quite different in character - her being very energetic and outgoing, whilst I am quite quiet and introverted. I think this in itself makes things difficult. I think I do need to be honest with myself though and in some ways I have made things worse. I've been avoiding her calls a bit because I haven't felt like being around people (in general, not just her) but she may well have taken this personally. And it probably is true that friendships have to be worked on, and are a two-sided thing, whereas she has very much taken the lead from the start. I think she probably feels a bit let down. But then from my perspective I kind of feel almost harassed by her constant calls and texts, which are probably no more than average but too much for me to handle. Is this the kind of stuff I should be putting in a letter to her if I decide to write one? I think once we've both cooled off it will be easier to discuss things anyway, but a letter might be a good starting point. Thanks again for the advice - keep it coming! Suz
  7. Hi guys, sorry to burden you so soon after joining the forum... Basically I think I've just lost one of only two or three friends I have. I met her about 18 months ago at college and we've always got on pretty well, although I know she struggles to understand my strange ways. However, having been feeling pretty depressed recently I have kind-of withdrawn even more than usual and haven't seen much of her. When I have seen her I've been trying to explain a bit about what I struggle with in the hope that she'll understand, for HER sake, so she doesn't think I'm being rude. But it seems as always happens between me and friends that I've hurt her now anyway. The thing is I don't understand what I've done wrong. She text me and asked if I wanted to go out for a drink but I said I couldn't because, as I've explained to her before, I can't do things on the spur of the moment. I have a routine that I have to follow, I know it probably sounds stupid but I can't handle it when things get changed or my routine gets broken. Well, I don't understand why but she text back and said that I've been pushing her away and she's really really hurt. I hate it when I hurt people which I so often seem to do so after much (literally!) and I text her back and apologised profusely. However, we then got into this long text conversation in which she said I was selfish and never put anyone before myself, and that friendships are a two way thing and you have to work at them. I am aware of this, but I'm someone who needs a LOT of space to myself, especially when I'm feeling low. Anyway, I've ended up ruining another friendship without ever meaning to, and feel very confused as after all these years I still don't understand how this whole frindship thing works. People are just so complicated!!! ...no offense... I'm really upset so if anyone has any words of wisdom or can explain why this has happened and what I've done wrong I'd greatly appreciate it. And if anyone can relate or let me know if this is an aspie thing that would be great too. I'm not diagnosed at the mo but am thinking more and more every day that perhaps I should be. Thanks you guys. Suz Xx
  8. Hi something different... nice to meet you! Suz
  9. Hi Tally Thank you for your post, I found it very interesting and helpful. I can very much relate to the fact that there are bits of 'me' that don't seem to fit with the diagnoses I've been given so far, and whilst I have benefited from some of the treatments I've been given, a lot of things still remain a problem. I agree it's very easy to kind-of feel like it's your own fault, like you're just not trying hard enough when you know that actually you're doing the very best you can. In that sense I can see why getting a diagnosis could be a very good thing. I think it's great that you have found such a good counsellor - like you there aren't really any services where I live for adults with autism, although nellie has told me she runs a support group locally which sounds like it could be very helpful. Thank you for the suggestion about writing a list of symptoms. I have always found it much easier to express myself on paper rather than in person and I think this is a great idea. I did actually move out of home into supported housing when I was just 19, it was a project for young people with various different issues. It did me far more harm than good though - the little bit of support I got just didn't seem to help, and I really struggled to look after myself and stuff. The project housed a lot of young people with drug and alcohol issues and to be honest I found it a very very frightening place to live. I was also very easily influenced if you know what I mean, which made matters 1000 times worse!! I moved back in with my Mum a year later and as frustrating as I find it sometimes I know this is where I need to be at the moment. I can also totally relate to the 'growing up much more slowly' theory. It's weird, as a child I was incredibly mature for my age and much preferred adult conversation to childish play. Since my mid-teens I seem to have sort-of gone backwards!! - I now feel much less mature than my peers, and there are a lot of things that they do that I just can't. Anyway, thank you for sharing, I hope you don't mind me doing the same. It really is good to know I'm not the only one who struggles with these sort of things... Suz
  10. 13.375... After about 10 minutes and bearing in mind how fast each game is!! Suz
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