Matt - The Autistic Life

In my area I don't think are any specialist services available. If you are on ESA or JSA there may be opportunities to have a specialist career advisor (who may or may not be specialist, trained, or a career advisor) who's main focus would be getting you into work rather than seeing what help you needed to get into work. I personally believe for those diagnosed at a young age, having a specialist to meet and teach life lessons that promote independence, like socialising, shopping, money management e.t.c and having a set course, with a folder or way of keeping track to ease them into these activities would help hugely. Because many with ASD rely so much on their parents, and because so many parents are so used to giving constant support, being able to step back slightly and let people learn for themselves but with some guidance would be a good plan I would say. I know that I could have done with some help earlier, but a hands off approach made me learn a lot very fast on my own, so there has to be a balance dependent on the individual. Great topic though, and I think self-help and site such as these will play a big part in adult services!

Undiagnosed adult, but only because I am on an incredibly long waiting list, or faced with an incredibly expensive loan for private diagnosis.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/chocolatechipcookies_72335 Perfect doughy crisp cookies, and you can cook a batch of 3 or 4 at a time and keep the rest rolled up in the fridge!

Read and research! From what you've said it sounds like you may have ASD. Social exhaustion and problems with socialising are very common. Check symptoms on line, I have a list on the site I write for.

You've been able to get a diagnosis in the first place which is an amazing thing! This should not be a low point. Many people, because of the lack of support and misunderstanding of ASD, find that the diagnosis can be a bad thing where it should be the opposite. You've been given a map of your own mind, and while there are plenty of unknown territories that others may know of in their maps, you can know fill yours in! Get reading, check out some of the great books on the subject and ask about any sticking points you have. It only gets better from here.

I'm not a big fan of aspie and autie. Whilst it's a way of taking the words autistic or ass-burgers away from people who use them in a demeaning way (and we all know that it happens unfortunately) and using a word that we as a community have defined ourselves as, I don't feel they help sometimes. I have seen arguments on forums where it's aspies vs. NT's and similar, and while it may sometimes seem like a battle to those who are struggling, we need to discourage this viewpoint. I refer to people with ASD as... people with ASD. Because we are all people, and some of us have ASD traits. It's humanising and it's simple, and completely correct. That's my viewpoint, and I think the community and the public at large would benefit from a single, simple term to use to make it clearer

Talking through what is on your mind with others is really helpful. Go for it! It not only gets things off of your chest and less stressed about them, but lets you go over what you may have already decided, and gain a new perspective, as well as another person's. Good luck

Politics enters every single part of our life, and it genuinely shocks me when people don't know or want to know about what's going on! I think it is very important that we know about the current state of affairs in our local area, country and the world in general. People always talk about a wish that the world was better, or things are unfair. How do they think things happen? Leave someone else to do it? So get out there and talk about politics! Debate and enjoy it!

Making friends and joining social circles can be hard, but finding the keys to how people meet others and starting friendships is a good start. The majority of people with have friends from school/college and university, but in a lot of cases things change, people move and these friendships don't stay. A job is a good way of having access to people, but may not always be the best. Using the internet and forums on topics you are interested in helps with learning social skills and norms, but getting into local groups of topics you are interested in is a great way of meeting others you have something in common with! If you are interested in painting, writing, miniatures, gaming e.t.c there are a wealth of local groups that meet up for these subjects. Google for your interest in your local area or use things like gumtree to find them. Best of luck!

Congratulations on the diagnosis! You haven't let anyone down, and from here you can only understand yourself and how to deal with any problems you have better! For all those looking for a diagnosis in the UK, the legislation call the Autism Act 2009 was a big milestone in Autism law and has more information on it here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autism_Act_2009 It is meant to push the government, health service and local trusts to have in place a clear pathway for diagnosis for all(not just children, this focuses on adults) and the start of training and provision of services for those with ASD. In practice all of these things are still four years on relatively thin on the ground, especially dependent on the area you live. The first step is contacting your GP. Go in with a list of symptoms after doing your own research, and also a list of difficulties you face. Detailing problems with socialising, interpersonal relationships and especially finding and holding work are really the things that will make the best case. Ask for a diagnosis from a someone who knows more and get them to clearly explain what will happen next. You should then be referred to your local Primary Care Trust or PCT, which is really more about mental health, who may hold a meeting to determine your issues and needs, or a clinical psychologist who may be able to diagnose with the right expertise, or best of all a specialist local service which may or may not be government funded. The waiting list for a diagnosis, let alone help, may be long. If you are not happy with your doctor or feel you have not been taken seriously or brushed off, make another appointment with a different doctor or surgery, you are completely within your rights to do so. In the case that your area is not best equipped to help or there is a large waiting list, there may be a case for you to be sent to a different authority outside your area if funding is made possible. You can discuss this ith your doctor, but I would suggest using the National Autistic Society's Services Directory looking for diagnosis and support in your area here http://www.autism.org.uk/directory.aspx Also e-mail the NAS or even join them! They are incredibly helpful and I could not recommend anyone more. Pappy - Congratulations again, you've got further than many others have (including myself, now over a year waiting for an official diagnosis) and get reading on the subject, meet some others and keep posting if you ever need help

Being a "control freak" and needing to know or plan everything in advance is a really common thread for those with ASD. I believe in stems from the need for systems and a want for everything to follow a nice, obvious path. It can become problematic in social situations when disagreeing with something and needing to present why you feel something is or should be a certain way. Also in work, coping with changes to a system or seeing faults and flaws in potential changes. Relationships can be hard to, especially when partners get frustrated at needs to do certain things a certain way and letting them know when you perceive them doing something "the wrong way" - or just not your way. I've found that being relaxed about these things, taking mental notes and taking the times to try and understand what the other person, or system, is trying to achieve and and why is a good first step. Instead of automatically leading out with a criticism or how you think things should go, try taking a step back first. When communicating your disagreement or viewpoint it helps to bring up one point at a time, and use phrases such as "i see where you are coming from", "i understand", and then leading on with " it might be a an idea" or "have you thought of" instead of forcing you point across. When trying to get someone to do something they might instinctively react badly because of a perceived criticism of them or their work. Getting a person to understand something, and even framing it as their thought in the first place can make people more receptive to the idea, and this is a key concept in teamwork and better communication