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Laddo

Aspie meet ups

102 posts in this topic

I can get to Chester quite easily.

"I, have, have, have to use an e cigarette when impersonating sociability btw."

Haha! A true eccentric! :D How did you manage before they appeared. Were you a hermit?

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My social life, or shreds of sociability, or more correctly my parodic social performances, had to happen in places I could chain smoke. Ordinary society has never been able to contain the Alexanderplatz social phenomena, so it has happened on and off in various demi mondes over the years. These demi mondes had to be tolerant of my eccentricities.

 

I laboured in vain to keep up my quasi social life by lurking in smoking areas for about a year, then ditched going anywhere socially I couldn't smoke.

 

There's exceptions to my rampant pro smoking policy, - museums, art galleries, churches, i.e. anywhere I couldn't smoke before the ban seems to be fine. Rehearsal rooms aren't a problem, it's about music not society.

 

Actually, yes, have spent much of my life hermitting (at one point it was a respected profession you know), but there have been compensatory upswings of perhaps a little too much exposure.

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"...shreds of sociability, or more correctly my parodic social performances... Ordinary society has never been able to contain the Alexanderplatz social phenomena, so it has happened on and off in various demi mondes over the years. These demi mondes had to be tolerant of my eccentricities."

How poetically put! Although I've never smoked or vaped in my life, I can identify with your existential dilemma all the same. Smoking is your coping mechanism, and is probably more reliable than my own - running away, discreet 'stimming', full-blown meltdowns... ! Looking back I can see my own social circles as rather transitory demi mondes - never full, always demi. A monde plein, by defintion would be too mundane - 100% in fact, and therefore too stressful.

 

My own quasi social life tends to revolve around sundry 'misfits' - far more interesting and stimulating than the banal social whirl/world inhabited by the neurotypical hoi polloi.

 

I too am an occasional denizen of museums, art galleries, churches, etc. They have a mysterious socially calming effect. So do wild places (I don't mean nightclubs).

I'm intellectually and spritually inclined towards the eremitical life (yes, it's a worthy profession), but I'm 'socially' inclined towards the dubious attractions of the demi monde. The demi monde usually comes to me, rather than me going to it. .

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We could, quite easily insert a chatbox on the page. That could be handy for both quick and idle chit-chat. I know many forums have a chat box.

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Chatbox could be good IF everybody thinks before they writes. It is easy to offend / be indiscreet / violate the terms of service with those things.

 

@Mihaela: Studied poetry properly, at one of the big universities (particularly Shelley and Spenser).

 

Hope you picked up on the hint of self mocking arrogant delusionality in my writing above (do you know a song called "Jackie", - Scott Walker sang it in English).

 

Very naff bohemianism is my forte.

 

Some of my demi monde adventures have been downright dangerous. Became increasingly reclusive from my mid twenties.

 

Museums: Warrington is a gem.

 

Misfit friends: We might pm. Yes, me too, only a few.

Edited by Alexanderplatz

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Professional hermits:

 

In one period (18th century?) big posh people, particularly in England, had enormous big posh gardens. These gardens were meant to be strolled or driven or rode round by guests, who would find various bits of landscape, fake Greek temples, fountains or whatever, amusing, awe inspiring or whatever.

 

Having a hermitage was all the rage at some point in this fashion, and some of the rich used to employ a willing local to be a part time hermit for the entertainment of guests.

 

It must have been a strange gig for the hermit.

 

PS found a web page on it:

 

http:// www . hermitary . com/lore/ornamental_hermits . html

Edited by Alexanderplatz

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Chatbox could be good IF everybody thinks before they writes. It is easy to offend / be indiscreet / violate the terms of service with those things.

 

True, but mods could kick off the offensive types. I must admit though that, compared with many, I find this forum surprisingly free of offensive comments and language. In real life, too, I've yet to be offended or hurt by an Aspie. Of course, we may have our differences, but that is good. In general, we seem better behaved than NTs and we think more. Since I realised I was on the spectrum, I've found a whole lot of new and interesting people - and I feel so much safer among them. I'm more wary among NTs, for it's them who've caused the difficulties in my life. Of course most don't, but I've known some really nasty and creepy types, who sense my vulnerability and exploit it.

 

Studied poetry properly, at one of the big universities (particularly Shelley and Spenser).

 

An unusual combination. I read a lot of poetry, not all of it in English either. I have very wide poetic interests, but the Anglophone poets with whom I most identify would include Emily Dickinson (undoubtedly an Aspie), WB Yeats, Edward Thomas, Alice Meynell, Francis Thompson, John Clare, William Blake, and many others...

 

do you know a song called "Jackie", - Scott Walker sang it in English

 

Yes I do, and I know the French original too by the inimitable Jacques Brel.

 

Very naff bohemianism is my forte.

 

A concept entirely new to me. How fascinating!

 

Some of my demi monde adventures have been downright dangerous. Became increasingly reclusive from my mid twenties.

Some of my intellectual adventures in my search for Truth have been downright dangerous, but well worth it. I'm becoming less reclusive than I was, but paradoxically my longing for the eremitical life has never been so strong. I've never been to Warrington museum. I have relatives who lived at Great Sankey. I bet they've been there. Pontefract museum is a gem too - a flamboyant art nouveau building that oozes all things liquorice.

 


In one period (18th century?) big posh people, particularly in England, had enormous big posh gardens. These gardens were meant to be strolled or driven or rode round by guests, who would find various bits of landscape, fake Greek temples, fountains or whatever, amusing, awe inspiring or whatever.

 

There's not much you can tell me about hermits, follies, big posh gardens ...or even hermeticism (which has nothing to do with hermits). I have several books on follies, including Barbara Jones' seminal work. I adore them, and the eccentric mentality that lay behind them, but I'm also attracted to the deeper philosophical meaning behind that quintessentially 18th century seemingly frivolous fashion.

 

Having a hermitage was all the rage at some point in this fashion, and some of the rich used to employ a willing local to be a part time hermit for the entertainment of guests.

 

Adverts for ornamental hermits were published, giving job specifications, which included such requirements as not cutting or washing hair, beards or nails, looking picturesquely unkempt, wearing sackcloth, refraining from intoxicating liquor, etc. Sometimes they were provided with a bible or skull in order to meditate upon mortality - or use as a drinking vessel. Wealthy friends of their patrons were given tours around the estate, and the rustic hermitage was the status symbol of the times, where they would glimpse through the foliage a 'real' hermit, dwelling upon higher thoughts to which they themselves aspired. The whole idea seems so alien to the modern mind, yet I can identify with it so very easily. I've written at some length on the vanitas theme in art, and hermits come into this quite heavily. St Anthony of Egypt was the archetypal hermit of the Christian tradition, and had an enormous influence. The western esoteric Tradition also makes much of hermits, and Jung identified the hermit as as one of his archetypes - common to all humanity.

 

I've been reading the Hermitary website for years now, and even joined their forum. Being inhabited by hermits, social interaction is understandably sparing and infrequent!

Seriously off-topic, but so interesting! :)

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One thing I did notice about the pro hermits was that the pay was quite good for the times, though the working conditions very difficult (this thing about not cutting the nails). It would be very interesting to know what the pro hermits themselves made of it all.

 

And another thing about these pro hermits, it wasn't about isolation, they had to perform, so it will have involved showmanship. I'm assuming no proper hermit would do the job.

 

Anyway, I'm on topic and off topic at the same time, - Aspie meet up - I want one, or think I want one, and this is a cyber aspie meet up. And springing off suddenly on tangents is one of the things I do. And knowing things.

 

" . . . looking picturesquely unkempt, . . ." - lovely stuff, thank you.

 

HELLO WORLD! - I think I'm doing that,

Edited by Alexanderplatz

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I love the idea of meetups but like I mentioned in the primary post, there are going to be problems with trying to travel, and distance is never something that you can simply overcome. I feel if the forum was bigger (I literally see the same three or four people every time I come on here) then maybe a meetup would be more likely for some, but I doubt I'm going to find anybody else on here that happens to live in York and I don't have the nerve to travel.

 

I'm not being a naysayer, and those that are willing to travel I'm sure will be more than happy to have a meetup, but for me this is still a pipe dream and incredibly far fetched at this time. I always wanted to meet up with people like myself as well...

 

I am in York, I am interested in meeting but still new to all this and finding my feet. PM me if you want to talk more before considering it

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I can get to York.

 

Has anyone considered doing a treasure hunt. You can get one for York off the internet. takes about an hour & a half to wander round York answering a few questions. Apologies if this is a silly idea, but it would be something to do.

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It doesn't seem there has been much success with this ideal becoming reality. I am not surprised by this given the difficulties a lot of us face with the problems of transport.

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I can get to York.

 

Has anyone considered doing a treasure hunt. You can get one for York off the internet. takes about an hour & a half to wander round York answering a few questions. Apologies if this is a silly idea, but it would be something to do.

 

No, it's not a silly idea at all. I'd really enjoy that.

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Mihaela

 

if there were 4 people or more, I would come along.

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I think people should find out where their local asd centre or help group is. the chances are that there is one quite close by that doesn't involve a lot of travelling/expense.

this may seem a bit of a chore but its making that link and it can lead to other things and other people in your area...and in turn more chance of organised meet ups arranged on here with the local people we meet

.could we have a map and markers for which area we are from?

or a page each ie; south, north west, north east, ?

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I have recently moved to Leamington Spa in Warwickshire. So far I have not found a "local ASD centre" or help group, other than a support group in my workplace for parents of autistic children.

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I have recently moved to Leamington Spa in Warwickshire. So far I have not found a "local ASD centre" or help group, other than a support group in my workplace for parents of autistic children.

that's lucky, is it a big company? or just a caring one?

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that's lucky, is it a big company? or just a caring one?

Both, I guess. They have been awarded the accolade "Responsible Business of the Year 2014".

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Both, I guess. They have been awarded the accolade "Responsible Business of the Year 2014".

 

And they've been short-listed in two categories at the Business in the Community Responsible Business Awards 2016: the Asda Environmental Leadership Award category and the Employment for Excluded Groups category.

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There is another forum called Asperclick where they have organised group Skype chats every Saturday.

Eustace, are you on Asperclick? I haven't been able to log on there since the site was revamped a few months ago. I've sent several requests for a password reminder, to no avail.

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I also share every one of your listed interests

Except that I vote, which presumably you disapprove of.

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I run a group where people can meet and I run a channel on IRC where people can chat. If you tweet me I will give you the information and I can post it here too if people are interested.

 

I'm in the Leicester area.

Edited by Autismus

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