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Alexanderplatz

New, freshly diagnosed at 58

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A kind hello to all. It's been confirmed for a week from a consultant level specialist that I have asd - don't know if I'm aspie, HFA or whatever.`

 

It has been a very, very strange and hard pathway to this point.

 

That's it for now, but I'll probably be back, a lot.

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Hello and welcome.

 

I too had a late diagnosis, and it was quite a battle at times - but well worth it. There seems to be a trend in giving vague ASD diagnoses. With the DSM5 scrapping the Asperger's and the catch-all PDD-NOS diagnoses, it comes as no surprise to me. However, I'd have thought that a more precise diagnosis would be more useful when it comes to assessing support needs. I was hoping that PDA and the female-type AS profile would become a specific diagnoses in their own right, but it's unlikely.

I feel ambivalent over diagnostic labels for they can be very useful, and yet they can also be used (wrongly) against us in various ways.

Edited by Mihaela

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There's a follow up appointment to come where I might quiz the doc about what my diagnosis might have been before the changes, see if he'll offer an informal opinion - he might not have one to offer.

 

I'm high functioning and avoidant of anything like an assessor of support needs coming anywhere near me, though this kind of thing might be a factor in my future. In my locality it looks like the NHS provide nothing for us anyway. It has been an ordeal of over a decade getting to the diagnosis, with some disheartening twists. There were years seeing my GP until she deduced me as on the scale - that was three years ago and the information hit me like a train. Before that it was hunting down a GP who would take my mental / social problems seriously.

 

On the emotional support side I'm blessed with a handful of solid friends who know what I'm like and accept me - this really is fortunate.

 

I've been the black sheep in my family, the liver on the stony side, the waste of space and sometimes the scapegoat. This situation has improved, my father has accepted me after a life time of trying to modify my behaviour. Another family member is being significantly fantastic.

 

My broadband allowance is about to expire, so must dash off for now.

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I'm on the waiting list for an assessment, that will probably happen close to my 60th birthday. The first suggestion of it was 6 or 7 years ago when a new friend I'd spent a lot of time talking to asked me if I had Aspergers. I just replied no, and no more was said. She has a friend with it, so I assume she recognised some signs. Since then, I've gradually worked out for myself that I may have it. It was then spotted recently by a mental health nurse, who I hadn't mentioned it to, who gathered preliminary data and passed it to the people who do the assessments, who put me on the waiting list. So presumably that means they think there's a good possibility that I have it.

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Sounds similar to my story - a friend spotted it, then another, then another. I was lucky to bump into people who knew about it, as I hadn't the foggiest idea I might have AS myself.

 

Diagnosis has been a great positive thing for me, things make more sense, - much confusion resolved.

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Diagnosis has been a great positive thing for me, things make more sense, - much confusion resolved.

Same here! If only I'd had it decades earlier :(

I worked out, by a process of elimination, that I had AS - having dismissed it for years for I'd only known of the classic male presentation which didn't seem to fit my traits. The sudden death of my mother in 2012, and my desperate need of support, started this journey of discovery.

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I went repeatedly half mad trying to figure out what was going on - hadn't a clue.

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I find it frustrating that for decades no one, as far I remember, has ever made any sort of comment that suggested there might be something wrong/different. I think I've learned to put on a good act, so maybe it's not obvious now, but surely someone must have spotted something unusual over all those years. Maybe it's the British stiff upper lip, and total inability to communicate on any sort of deep level. Although I was like that too until almost 10 years ago.

 

I was going to the local mental health support workshop, where I spent almost all my time in the computer room working on a project that I was struggling with at home. Recently I was talking to one of the staff who commented on how she couldn't see why I went there, when I was totally self contained, and didn't need any support, or anyone else. I've suspected that's how I come across for some time, but that's the first time someone has confirmed how great my acting is! If my act is that good, it puts me in a really difficult situation, as it seems pretty obvious that I'm covering things up so well, that no one notices that I actually need some help. If I tell anyone I'm not feeling well, or I'm not dealing with things I need to, they rubbish it, as I look fit, healthy and perfectly fine. But all my connections with other people are superficial, and I never make really deep meaningful connections. I'm always on the edge of every thing and every relationship. I don't really read signals, and don't think I send them either. But no one seems to notice any of that. Or maybe they do, but I don't notice that they do.

 

I've kept going like this for decades, but as I get older I'm running out of energy.

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"Disability isn't about being brave it's about being organised." Ian Dury - I like that saying.

 

To my limited knowledge, a Consultant Psychiatrist who dxs adults will be aware of the contrived social performance that some adults on the spectrum can do so well.

 

The majority of people, and that includes mental health workers, GPs and most Psychiatrists, do not have the first clue how to spot ASD in adults as they don't know what to look for, and as far as I know, adult aspies can become very good at automatic masking.

 

In my case, I'm pretty certain my mother shamed me out of my more overt stimming at a young age.

 

From what little I know, it looks to me like you meeting that mental nurse who spotted it was fortunate - he could well be proved right. Everyone who spotted me was proved right.

 

Hope all goes well and keep in contact with how things go.

Edited by Alexanderplatz

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Hello,

 

I'm from Dorset and I've been diagnosed for a long while now. It has opened some doors for me but still life is very hard having high functioning autism. Like you I was a black sheep in the family too. I have got more used to the diagnosis in recent years. I have a few friends with Aspergers syndrome.

 

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Hello Julie!
I agree. Life for us high-functioning types can be very, very difficult. Most people don't understand why we can't manage better, and many don't want to know. Life has taught me to be very wary of NTs, for so many make use of us. Doyou find you get on better with your Aspie friends?

Yes, Confused, we can act pretty well, but that can work against us. If we pass as virtually 'normal', people (NTs) assume that we are like them, and don't need support. They don't realise how sensitive we really are.

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hello all had to put my six peneth worth in i need some one to tell me what the word "support" means the first line of defence at my doctors is good morning how can we help

i would like to make a appointment

what is the matter with you

i need to see the doctor

i am sorry he is fully booked for the next 2 weeks

oh ! i say well can i have an appointment the week after??

sorry comes the reply we cannot book that far ahead

you will have to ring next week ????? i need help now not in 2 weeks !!! in the end i give in

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I'm on the waiting list for an assessment, that will probably happen close to my 60th birthday. The first suggestion of it was 6 or 7 years ago when a new friend I'd spent a lot of time talking to asked me if I had Aspergers. I just replied no, and no more was said. She has a friend with it, so I assume she recognised some signs. Since then, I've gradually worked out for myself that I may have it. It was then spotted recently by a mental health nurse, who I hadn't mentioned it to, who gathered preliminary data and passed it to the people who do the assessments, who put me on the waiting list. So presumably that means they think there's a good possibility that I have it.

 

yes this is like me too. people at uni said it to me and I didn't know what aspie meant then lol

 

I knew I was different but not the name, obviously I have missed other aspie's trying to reach out to me, someone who recognised it in me too, but I missed those chances. many people have said it to me too.

 

it wasn't me who said the A word first

 

now im waiting and waiting :-(

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Mr Salvador you will get there you just have to find the right person who will help you unlock the way to getting a diagnosis. That might be PALS or your MP or even an advocacy service.

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