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#1 trekster

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Posted 01 July 2015 - 06:52 PM

This topic has been created for people to openly discuss their gender. Whether questioning your gender, supporting another person questioning their gender or consider yourself on the trans* spectrum all are welcome. All gender identities will be respected whether genderqueer, non-binary, male to female, female to male or a mixture of different genders. Please respect peoples right to privacy regarding their gender.



#2 Livelife

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Posted 23 July 2015 - 05:54 AM

It appears people are not comfortable discussing this topic I can understand that as it's something very personal.

#3 trekster

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Posted 23 July 2015 - 09:57 AM

As a sexuality thread was offered it was only fair to offer a trans thread as well because the t is often missed out in lgbt discussions.

#4 Livelife

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Posted 23 July 2015 - 01:37 PM

I totally agree and wasn't saying anything in any way that it should be. I was just making a comment on the lack of posts sorry if I appeared to be critical that wasn't my intention.

#5 Waterboatman

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Posted 23 July 2015 - 01:52 PM

The mental image we provide ourselves can vary a lot.

 

I am male quite obviously, yet female. aggressive, rip your head off. The perfect Tom Cat.

 

Ian   



#6 Livelife

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Posted 23 July 2015 - 02:53 PM

I think that's within us all all at times irrespective of who or what we are

#7 trekster

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Posted 23 July 2015 - 11:19 PM

Transgender is when you are born with female body parts or male body parts but feel your gender doesn't match those body parts 100% of the time. So someone can feel they have no gender or a mixture of genders (both known as non binary or genderqueer) of the opposite gender to what their body parts tell them, male to female (for those born with male body parts) or female to male (for those born with female body parts). This causes mental distress to the affected person.

 

Male to female transgender folk would prefer to do what they considered female or neutral activities. Driving for example would not cause distress with their gender (unless they were labelled something involving their incorrect gender "stupid women driver" or "typical boy racer" for example) as it's considered a gender neutral activity. Wearing make up, dresses, skirts, painting fingernails, going on hen parties, going to female only clubs, could be possible activities for male to female transgender folk.

 

Female to male transgender folk would prefer to do what they considered male or neutral activities. Playing football, boxing, going on stag do's, going to male only clubs could be possible activities for female to male transgender folk.

 

There are transgender folk who dont really engage in typical male or typical female activities. But they have distress in other aspects of their lives, some trangender folk can manage with a name change and dressing permanently in their true gender. But others need hormones and surgery in order to feel 'comfortable in their own skin'. Even having a wee can set off distress in transgender folk.

 

Ally



#8 dekaspace

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Posted 25 July 2015 - 03:19 AM

My response could technically be in either section, I am male and attracted to women but I see myself as quite feminine and like the idea of being a woman so I can have smooth skin, long hair and be able to be glam, and be asked out by the opposite sex, and it is a little strange but I wonder what pregnancy and childbirth and having periods is like.

 

I basically wish I can be a man one minute or a woman the next, probably a man in my leisuire time as I like more things associated with men such as certain video games and movies but a woman in public and when relaxing.

 

Its a strange thing though.

 

The only other thing is sexual related, I cannot ever perform sexually as a man as I am in a situation where as I have only ever under 6 times in my life been in a state of complete relaxation I dont know how to activate it for lack of better words so being a man in that sense is useless.



#9 trekster

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Posted 25 July 2015 - 10:05 AM

Sexuality is very different to gender, there are straight trans folk, bi trans folk and gay trans folk.

 

Thank you for sharing your experiences. If you wished to get help further look up "gender identity clinics" or "gender identity disorder" on NHS choices.



#10 Mihaela

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Posted 11 August 2015 - 11:44 AM

Atypical gender identities are a lot more common in people on the autistic spectrum than in neurotypical people.  So also are asexuality, hypersexuality and object sexuality.  As you say, gender identity and sexuality are unconnected, but they are both largely genetically determined.  The common factor is autism.  It genetically predisposes us so that we are more likely to be 'different' in these ways - as well as in many other ways.



#11 Gold MD

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Posted 09 November 2015 - 01:02 PM

I love transgender people. There is nothing wrong with this. I've never told my family I don't care if a guy believes he should have been born a girl. They are not homophobic as such but I don't think my parents have much positive things to say about gay people. The word P-O-O-F or tranny is very nasty.

#12 trekster

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Posted 14 November 2015 - 09:25 PM

Gold MD thanks for your support for transgender people. However homophobia and transphobia are very different things.

#13 trekster

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Posted 30 November 2015 - 05:03 PM

Atypical gender identities are a lot more common in people on the autistic spectrum than in neurotypical people.  So also are asexuality, hypersexuality and object sexuality.  As you say, gender identity and sexuality are unconnected, but they are both largely genetically determined.  The common factor is autism.  It genetically predisposes us so that we are more likely to be 'different' in these ways - as well as in many other ways.


Excellent point there autism is the common factor with gender and sexuality.

I'm wondering if agender people are commonly on the autism spectrum?

#14 Mihaela

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Posted 01 December 2015 - 11:31 AM

Gender dysphoria is 6-7 times more likely for those on autistic spectrum, than in the neurotypical population - highly significant.  Many people on the spectrum see themselves as androgynous.  This is an area needing much more research.  My own research suggests that certain genes associated with autism predispose us towards gender dysphoria/androgyny.  The trigger for this would be a hormone imbalance during a critical period of pregnancy.  Similarly, such imbalances can also cause physical intersex conditions - the now banned drug diethylstilbesterol (DES) being the most notorious example.



#15 MiddleEarthNet

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Posted 08 December 2015 - 11:59 AM

I wonder why it is higher on the autistic spectrum.

 

This subject has been bothering me for a few weeks now.  I was born female.  I've never felt female and would always describe myself as a tom boy.  But I never really though of myself as male either.  However my interests, personality, what few friends I've had, everything is distinctly male.  Mum is always telling me off for buying boys t-shirts.  And I hate with a real passion being treated as a girl.  I've always wanted to be flat chested and I am so ashamed of, you know, that if I am changing in a changing room, I'll go into the toilets to change my top.  And before I stopped wearing swimming costumes altogether, I would cover my chest with my arms.  I also can't even talk about the other female stuff by name.  It disgusts me.  But until a few weeks ago that was it.

Then one of my support workers asked me outright.  Not in a nasty way.  But she thinks I might be and I might be happier if I went down that route.

 

Now I'm really confused.  I don't know what to do.  I don't know who or what I am or how I would deal with it in reality.



#16 trekster

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Posted 08 December 2015 - 01:14 PM

Got to your gp and ask to be referred to a gender identity clinic. Tell your gp all the things you have mentioned here.

There is also ungendered (agender) and a mixture of genders as a posibility. Gender services in England are now funded in a way that a direct referal to your gender identity clinic is the right route.

Www.gires.org.uk is an excellent website regarding gender resources for patients.

Hope this helps. Feel free to private message me if you have any other questions.

Ally

#17 MiddleEarthNet

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Posted 09 December 2015 - 11:33 AM

Thanks for the link.  That is very useful.  I'll continue to have a read through that.



#18 trekster

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Posted 13 December 2015 - 12:11 PM

Anytime that's what were here for.

#19 trekster

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Posted 08 January 2017 - 02:20 AM

https://spectrumnews...sphoria-autism/

As a result of some quite extensive research, guidance has been produced for professionals working in gender medicine and those working in diagnosing autism to refer to the other service where possible.

This is happening to patients from teenage
So anyone who presents as trans when being given an autism diagnosis will be assessed for possible gender dysphoria.

Patients going to the gender identity services will be tested for autism if they present that way.

There's a number of concerns.

1, that people would have to disclose their sexuality because that can be confused with gender as well.

2, that a rise in autistic patients going through gender identity services will mean they get treated with less understanding and compassion due to old school values regarding what autistics can and cannot do or consent for treatment.

3, services will be unable to cope because patients are waiting for an autism diagnosis and this can hold up treatment.

4, how will post diagnostic services work in regards to gender identity services?

5, services being overprotective because there's not enough money so letting the easier cases through first.


Yes it is good to recognise autism and or gender dysphoria at an earlier age but only if the services aren't held up due to a lack of understanding as a result.

#20 gmboy

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Posted 08 January 2017 - 09:43 PM

Thanks for posting this, Trekster.  It's good to know that some initial guidelines have been developed.  I read the article and followed the link to the first reference, but haven't found the actual guidelines.  If anyone happens to have a direct link to the guidelines that would be of interest to me, and I guess others.  I also note that this appears to be based in USA, not UK, though from what I can gather some gender clinics in the UK are doing some ASC screening.



#21 trekster

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Posted 08 January 2017 - 11:02 PM

I did look for the same guidelines in the uk but couldn't find any. Although I found a newspaper article in the uk but this seems to have gone.

Edited by trekster, 08 January 2017 - 11:03 PM.


#22 MiddleEarthNet

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Posted 09 January 2017 - 10:26 AM

Definitly bookmarking that recent link.  The support worker that asked me previously has been worried that because of my autism that when I am ready to go down that route I wouldn't get through the assessments because of my communication difficulties.



#23 trekster

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Posted 23 January 2017 - 07:09 PM

Can the support worker or another person who understands you go with you to the assessments?

#24 fade

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Posted 29 January 2017 - 09:55 PM

I've found being trans and ASD really hard.  I've heard from enough trans people to know transitioning can be hard at the best of times.  But when you really struggle to communicate with people and cope with society, it adds a whole extra layer of hard.  I'm not out to anyone IRL, only online, and I can't see this changing any time soon, which really sucks.

 

I haven't really used this forum much since I joined five months back, but I saw this thread and that it was a little under used, so I thought I'd poke my head up and say hi.  No idea if there any other trans people around here, or if its just me, but here I am.



#25 trekster

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Posted 29 January 2017 - 11:38 PM

There is a conference every year called autscape which seems to have a gathering of 10+ autistic trans folk. Coming out is difficult for anyone both as autistic and as trans. Wenn Lawson has written some papers on autism and is out both as autistic and the as trans.

#26 MiddleEarthNet

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Posted 11 February 2017 - 10:59 AM

Sorry about the slow reply trekster. I totally forgot to check back.
Yes my support worker would come with me. I already have them attend every medical appointment with me. But from my experience, not every medical person allows them to speak. Some refuse anything but me talking and don't allow them to help out.

Fade, that's a similar situation to me.

I keep on thinking about autscape. Maybe this is Year I do it.

#27 trekster

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Posted 22 February 2017 - 11:21 AM

The ones that refuse to allow my support workers to speak for me when I've given permission in the room at the time I refuse to see again.

#28 MiddleEarthNet

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Posted 23 February 2017 - 07:12 PM

I frequently hear 'I want to hear it from you', even though like you I had given permission.




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