• Announcements

    • Kris

      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   06/04/2017

      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   Depression and other mental health difficulties are common amongst people on the autistic spectrum and their carers.   People who are affected by general mental health difficulties are encouraged to receive and share information, support and advice with other forum members, though it is important to point out that this exchange of information is generally based on personal experience and opinions, and is not a substitute for professional medical help.   There is a list of sources of mental health support here: <a href="http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=18801" target="_blank">Mental Health Resources link</a>   People may experience a more serious crisis with their mental health and need urgent medical assistance and advice. However well intentioned, this is not an area of support that the forum can or should be attempting to offer and we would urge members who are feeling at risk of self-harm or suicide to contact either their own GP/health centre, or if out of hours contact NHS Direct on 0845 4647 or to call emergency services 999.   We want to reassure members that they have our full support in offering and seeking advice and information on general mental health issues. Members asking for information in order to help a person in their care are seeking to empower both themselves and those they represent, and we would naturally welcome any such dialogue on the forum.   However, any posts which are deemed to contain inference of personal intent to self-harm and/or suicide will be removed from the forum and that person will be contacted via the pm system with advice on where to seek appropriate help.   In addition to the post being removed, if a forum member is deemed to indicate an immediate risk to themselves, and are unable to be contacted via the pm system, the moderating team will take steps to ensure that person's safety. This may involve breaking previous confidentiality agreements and/or contacting the emergency services on that person's behalf.   Sometimes posts referring to self-harm do not indicate an immediate risk, but they may contain material which others find inappropriate or distressing. This type of post will also be removed from the public forum at the moderator's/administrator's discretion, considering the forum user base as a whole.   If any member receives a PM indicating an immediate risk and is not in a position (or does not want) to intervene, they should forward the PM to the moderating team, who will deal with the disclosure in accordance with the above guidelines.   We trust all members will appreciate the reasoning behind these guidelines, and our intention to urge any member struggling with suicidal feelings to seek and receive approproiate support from trained and experienced professional resources.   The forum guidelines have been updated to reflect the above.   Regards,   The mod/admin team
samantha.wierd

waiting for asd assessment report

10 posts in this topic

Hi everyone,

 

Its been an exhausting road but I pushed for an assessment at 22. Waited for 2 years no problem at all as I ccould keep checking where I am on the list. Have now had the assessment but the report could take as long as may. How do I cope with waiting without obsessing and it taking over my life? ??

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Im relying way too much on the report to tell me who I am. Im scared this will send me deeper into depression if I dont find out who I am. I also know Iit could be wrong then ill be back to square one thinking why am o different to everybody else and have been forever. At least while autism is a possibility I am not questioning myself anymore but like I say if I do not have autism i will be back to wondering and torturing myself seeing my obvious differences and tryong to work out why aimlessly. Failing miserably and pissing people off on the way. Ps apologies for my punctuation if this is difficult to read. I have clumsy fingers and im on my phone where thr button s are small and hard enough themselves to get right. Someobe please reply

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm waiting for my assessment, and gosh do I understand your feeling. I don't doubt I have ASD, yet I still wonder about what if it says I don't? I'll be honest and say I don't know if I can wait too long. I'm not coping and so scared of getting answers. I'm 22 like you were and although my GP seems confident I should be getting through the process fairly quickly due to a renewed local interest in adult autism late diagnosis (plus prior psychologist/paediatrician) background) as a child because they couldn't diagnose me.

 

I've joined a few sites. I sit and research/read other stories of people who were in the same boat. I'm trying to get into employment as my savings dwindle. I fully understand that. I've never felt like I belonged anywhere and I'm scared to push forwards without knowing. Because everything will just crash down for me again. I'm so sorry you are stuck waiting for so long, but you've been so patient for so long, and May isn't as long away as it feels. Though, I know from other situations how the wait is crippling.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thankyou for replying pink lemon. Do you know how long the referral process will take you? Where I am from in Derbyshire due to staffing levels and funding there is a wait of between 24-36 months. Its mad I go through different obsessions and whilst waiting for my assessment it was all I could focus on ( I have to try and keep it inside though as people get fed up of me obsessing. Now its over I don't know what to do. Well I know I have to wait and I know I shouldn't be putting my life on hold as funny as that sounds because outside of my four walls I dont have a life. There is nothing to put on hold but I know I should be trying to achieve something regardless pf autism or not . You say you dont know if you are coping do you strugglr with depression too? I have been diagnosed or misdiagnosed as may be the case with a number of 'comorbid conditions'

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My education was patchy I left school at 14 due to the social aspect and pressure I just could not continue so I spent my days either alone walking.the years between 14 and 18 were horrendous and very hard for me.many failed suicide attempts which I believe were cries for help, I did get a job which I loved at 18. I was so lucky. I was training to be an estate agent. I was so impressed. Pressure builds up and it eventually got too difficult to do my job after 3 years I was dismissed for various errors. I was still masking muself to be a normal person so there was no support for me. I compromised myself as a teen and did things I didn't want to do yo make friends whoch never worked either. I am so sorry if im being selfish talking abouy me me me. I read everything your typing I jist seem to turn everything back to myself. I also have a young son whos nearly 3 now and I live with the man of my dreams. I love my family. I also have problems at home. Due to my anxiety, sensory issues and its damn right hard loving me lol.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have no clue, Samantha.

 

And yes! I'm on antidepressants for depression. I'm quite sure I've been depressed for the past 5-7 years. I took a meltdown in December and was a danger to myself, and finally admitted that I wasn't okay and that I hadn't been for years. It was the first time I went to a Dr in years (first time as an adult) and she was lovely and supportive. On the 3rd follow up appointment I had the courage to ask her for a referral (I had a pre-written list of why). She read it and told me she'll send the referral once she looks up how to do it. I saw her on the 1st of March (three weeks after I asked) and she'd sent it and is under the impression I should have an appointment already/receive one soon. She's so lovely that she's been doing research on it.

 

I'm currently unemployed. Ach, who am I kidding? I've applied for hundreds of jobs and had a handful of interviews since I was 16 years old. I got by through student loans, and saving for the summer, even forced myself to volunteer in a charity shop. I tried to work in sales at a call centre (cold-calling basically) and I couldn't do it. I'm lucky that my parents are telling me not to push myself and work on feeling better. With my coming clean and admitting how bad off I am, they and my family have been amazing. But I need to be independent. I need to get a job and I'm considering doing a part-time Accountancy college course. To qualify for Bookkeeping (then work and save to gain full accountancy certification).

 

I learned that normal minds aren't constantly running through a million things? I missed so much school in my later years because I always felt ill/or had a meltdown. Right now, all I can do is reread stuff, wonder if my rabid and speedy reading is hyperlexia? Wonder why the heck I slipped through the cracks. I tried so hard to 'grow out' of my shyness/weirdness. I pushed myself into doing things I hated. I'm at a point where I actually feel angry as I realise... they knew something wasn't right about me. I get left to struggle because I was top- middle groups. I'm angry at myself for not being brave enough to speak out when I was a teenager. I obsess over 'what if they hadn't missed it?

 

Sorry! I'm just on edge waiting. Like you. The waiting is killing me, I don't know how long it will really take. My area isn't too big, and I'm selfishly hoping that somehow my past-records might push me up? I doubt it. I've got a BA 2:2 (It would have been 2:1, but I had late penalties on assignments (I panicked too much until after the main deadline when the pressure lessened (aka I was going to get a deduction anyway). I'd planned to up it during my honours year...but I dropped out due to the depression.

 

And it isn't a problem! we're in the same boat and I understand so much. I was about 15 when things started getting unbearable and I nearly left school at 16-17. I refused to attend, was housebound. They pushed to get me back since I was a well behaved and good student. Even though I was old enough to legally leave. I went because I didn't know what else to do. And you have accomplished so much without support! I'm so far behind and push away potential romantic interests because I don't want them to know what a mess I really am.

 

I don't want a diagnosis so I can have excuses. I want a diagnosis so I can get support to get a career and be independent. I've tried doing it myself.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I totally understand about why you want a diagnosis. The same as me to access SPECIFIC support. I also refused to attend. I was considered a Gifted/talented child at school, and was also predicted very good grades. I was always ambitious. Very well behaved at school. A model pupil in a way. It was the social expectations and pressures that made me give up. I did go on to get english and maths gcse before I got my job. I always felt I let myself down giving up but I had no choice in my mind. I have been quite reclusive since. But it comes in bouts like my depression.. I also have huge social and general anxiety. As for romantic interests. When we met I think I hid everything so well he even though t I was a normal person for about a year. That is some masking and it is seriously exhausting. Do you feel like you are just acting through life? Always just pretending to be like everyone else? Well done and massive cpngrats on your degree thats an amazing achievement and you should be so proud. I hope and wish so much ill be able to go to university one day. I am hugely interested in psychology. .. another reason im like a dog without a bone.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Psychology isn't all that it appears. The first year or two is pretty uninspiring. I started out in a general social sciences BA, in which I did Psychology. I wanted to be a Psychologist (hoping it would 'cure' me of my strangeness). I ended up switching to Politics & Sociology and... why is it those of us who are'masking' seem to be drawn to subjects that are immensely stressful on us. It was never the actual content of the course (I understood it, found it pretty easy). But I've noticed a tendency for especially (females) to end up doing jobs/subjects that are very reliant on social-customer interactions?

 

I don't remember a time when I haven't been acting. I didn't want to be abnormal, not fit in. I think if I didn't get so confused and struggle with interaction I'd be an extrovert, somewhat. I like people! I like spending time with friends. I like going on train trips to new places. But one outing/socialisation has me stressing before, and then utterly spent for about a week after. I find it hard to empathise, sometimes? I think. But not because I don't care. Sometimes, the troubles seem so insignificant or trivial that I don't get what the big issue is? Yet I'll cry over tragic news at the other end of the world. I sabotaged my one and only proper relationship and ghosted him. I regret it so much. I was just such a mess and I wasn't capable of dealing with it properly.

 

The diagnosis for me means that when I return to education, I'll be supported. I have never been comfortable asking for help, which brought me to where I am now. I hope that I might be able to find a training scheme in an accountancy/bookkeeping field that is somewhat friendly to me. I'm a hard worker, I'm never intentionally rude and people generally don't find me unpleasant as rule. Since being on antidepressants, I've found I'm so much calmer and more likeable to my family.

 

Psychology is a heavily social skills orientated field. Powerpoints, interviewing and networking is essential in the field. So please consider it carefully. It is fascinating to read about, though.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now