007paul007

This is for the new members to Krism who do not know about this site.

We are still going well and still welcoming more people.

No Problems Kirstie, you are welcome anytime as I say, also I know what it is like I have a teenage son at the severe end of the Autism spectrum and also a teenage daughter with special needs and yes they are a handful, so I know where you are coming from !

Thankyou Jadensmum for your kind words. Kirstie thankyou for your opinion, I am just letting be people know about the group that is all as Krism often has new members, you are as welcome to the group as everyone else. Perhaps with you giving such an honest opinion you could join the group and tell people what you think. Just for the record as well, there have been problems with logging into the group, but thankfully that has been sorted out now.

For those of you that are having trouble signing into the group at the moment please follow the simple instructions below, I am sure that this will be only temporary and that Ebay will sort out the problem soon. Click on yr group as usual - the url number or whatever it is will show on the address line on the top of the page. Delete the last digit and press Go and a message will come up as an error, BUT the discussions list will be on show. Click on that and hey presto - you're in!!

Just one member away from the big 200 members mark come on people come and join the happy family please.

Well just updating you on the latest I did contact the head and he apologised and said he would the problem out with me, I sent my son in the next day. They did however get delayed by traffic because of an accident and the school transport phoned the school to tell them they woudl be arriving and late the school said my son is not coming in do to him having diarhrea, the transport phone dme and I said no he is going in. I again phoned the head and again he apologised and said he would sort this problem out. My son arrived home from school tonight and the escort said he was off tomorrow, we thought it was due to a teachers training day or something until we looked in his home link book and they said my son had diarhea again and it takes 2 to look after him and that was not fair on the other students, so he has to be off until he got rid of this so called bug. My son has again been ok at school and it seems that the teacher is moving the goal posts , but the other day while my son was laying down waiting for the transport to pick him up early , someone kicked him in the throat, how that can happen with a room full of staff I don't know, lets just say all of them being there didn't stop it happen so how the teacher can have the excuse to say it is causing a risk to staff safety taking my son to the loo. The old teacher managed I think this new teacher should learn more , guess I have a long phone call with the head in the morning !

Well here we go again, I have had a phone call saying my son is being sent home, apparently he had to run straight to the toilet as soon as he got into school this morning and had a bit the runs. So now he is being sent home , now for most of you that know me through these boards you know my son is being investigated for Irritablle Bowel Syndrome (IBS), which the school know all about. Well the teacher, which is a new one this terms has decided it might me a bug that my son has had but the shocking thing is for example she did not know that a lot of children with Autism have bowel syndrome , she did not even know the damage to the routine it can cause and she ven thought that IBS was contagious ! She didn't even know there was a letter from the Doctor stating that it looks like IBs and that he is being investigated for this and has to go into hospital soon for the camera thingy. I then phoned the school nurse to find out that she had left and had been replaced by someone I have never heard off, she advised me to write to the school head over my concerns regarding the lack of knowledge this teacher has, but I might have to go to my GP agains for another letter saying about his IBS, they also have his medication at school to give him to stop the runs if and when he has had them. I understand they could be concerned that it could be a bug, as there is a lot of it going around this time of year, but I think they jump the gun a bit too much. Things just seem to be going from bad to worse at the moment, the teacher didn't even know what causes IBS at all. this is something I could do without at the moment ! Any advice on what to do would be grateful ?

A member posted this poem in our group, it was inspired by a tv advert. IMAGINE Imagine for a moment you have a special needs child It doesn?t matter how severe, moderate or mild, Imagine there are so many people willing & able to help To baby sit, to be with you & deal with every cry or yelp. Imagine the Doctor has given a quick diagnosis You are given time to take it all in, too hug and kiss, Imagine you?re given a name, lots of info, no spiel All the staff are understanding with how you might feel. Imagine you get your chosen school & a full statement Holding reviews to which all the professionals went, Imagine a class with full support where all needs are met LEA?s response to the school by the date that was set. Imagine having to make a visit to Accident & Emergency No 2 hour long wait, as your child is given priority, Imagine quick treatment to cut down on stress The child now sorted ready for home, no more a mess. Imagine a trip to the busy shopping centre Mega tantrums as little one refuses to go in there, Imagine Mum only wants to buy a new top Nobody stares as they pass by the shop. Imagine that you do get a regular respite Every other week for a day and a night, Imagine the social worker comes to call There is so much funding, he can offer it all. Imagine having a child with special needs, That?s the only place all these things will happen, You need imagination.

Karen Yes this Aspertame debate will go on , but imagine that it comes that there is a major problem with Aspertame , then the companies have lied to us yet again, but this would not be the first time. For example take the MMR and autism link that was everywhere, well The government then tell parents that the MMR is much safer than the single jabs and that there is more risk with the single jabs that the MMR jab. Well I read this another way, The single jabs that were to people long before the MMr came along were not safe and were a risk and the government never really said anything, so how can you trust what they say about the MMR jab. I am just using that say that they will only tell us things they want us to know. As for problems at school with the dinners , my daughter started high school last year and for the first three weeks unbeknown to us until the teachers contacted us, my daughter was not eating at school. They were having the healthy sendwiches, alot of it with brown bread and my daughter was not taking any because she didn't like it and at the time the vending machines had broken down. The problem was eventually sorted and my daughter eats ok now, but prefers the vending machine. That is another problem that could happen, if kids don't like it they won't eat it.

Thanks Hector

Just wondering what will when my son leaves school, we care for my two children full time and we both get ICA for caring for the children. The children both get DLA and the whole family get Income Support, My eldest who will soon be 17 also gets incapacity benefit (in youth) and he will be at school until he is 18/19, he currently gets free prescriptions, but what happens when he leaves school ? Will he still get them or will we have to apply for something for him on his behalf ?

I think we are moving away from the main reason I posted this thread , it was basically about freedom of choice , I mean some parents have sent in crisps for example in there kids lunch boxes and the teachers have removed them, despite all the arguements as to whether you agree that the meals should be changed or not at the end of the day, people should have a right to a choice without things being enforced on them .

Colin Thanks again for your very good comments. Studies in this day and age, do they really mean anything and are we always told all the facts or just what they want us to know . I mean scientists could prove that an elephant could hang over the side of a cliff with his tail tied around adaisy when in reality we all know that could not be true. Food companies etc only let us know what they want us to know ! I know that you most food that we eat and but today is garbage and no one knows it, take for example sugar free drinks , which are supposed to be good for you , they contain Aspertame, which keeps raising its head and is not all over the press like the Jamie Oliver food campaign was for example. Your point about being Alchohol being good for you in moderation in the long run, I fail to see how it can be good for you, I mean you can't drive a car under the influence of a certain amount of Alcholol , but you can drive it after having a good fry up. One thing we can tell from Alchohol is for exmple someone might start feeling drunk after a glass of wine , some might after 10 for example everyone is different. Just how all babies walk at different ages , they all talk at different ages and that is like dieting , we are all different , some can put in on easier . Some can not put it on at all, I think it is in the genes .

Karen Thanks for your reply, I am on the same diet as my mum and dad were, ok my parents have both passed over and both their deaths were not related to smoking, drinking alchohol or their diet. I have a medical annually and have always passed with flying colours, so I think i will have to disagree with you on the with the fact that I will see the bad effects with time , but then I cannot fortell the future. My I also had that the other members of my family that have passed away also were not related to any of the following reasons I have said at the start of this reply. People will get things wrong we can all refer to things like and I believe it is in the genes and some people can put it on easily than others. Baddad Just a quickie about the teeth thing, when I was a wee boy I ate lots of sweets and hated brushing my teeth , in fact in got so bad that at the age of 11 I saw a dentist and he said that I would lose my teeth by the age of 30 , i am now 40 and still have my full set of teeth, still love the junk food like chocolates, crisps and sweets on top of my sausage egg and chips. so there is one instant of a professional getting wrong , another one is I remember all these specialists telling me my son would never walk, guess what hey presto, I proved them wrong and got my son to walk and we are talking about people with letters behind their name. I was skinny as lad , just the same as I am now really and I was always trying to put on a bit of weight at school , people taking the mick and making feel down but in the end I just got on with it, what I am trying to say is that a thin person can suffer just the same as an obese person with how they feel about their shape etc and sometimes that is overlooked . Not all kids go hyper with sweets though, it can very on a number of things, for example take Orange juice, pure or the diluted drinks you get, Oranges are supposed to be good for you, I give my son that and he gets so hyper he could break the 100 metres record LOL Colin and Shelagh You mentioned about the diet effecting behaviour and mentioned smoking . Well one thing I would like to pint out is , Alchohol effects behaviour in everyone, some can be extremely violent , some can be down right silly, some can be anti social, some can be sick, people know this and so does the government, then tell me why is this not banned everywhere and why do people who are supposed to be adults drink it still when they know these effects and lets not forget the damage that does to your body. How many people on here drink alchohol ? This is a great debate though

Lil did you mange to join in the end , the chat hours in the group are always advertised ?

Hi Loraine Sorry to hear what you have been going through, I have all that to come when my son leaves school in a couple of years. My son does get respite at the moment however and is at the severe end of the spectrum and is also non verbal. When he started to go to respite it was just towards the end of our darkest and hardest time with him , we had things where he would not get into the transport and was rather unsettled now when he goes he can't to get on the transport and get off and leave us behind. He might need time to adjust either way I know from experience how bad things get and I hope they pick up for you soon.

BD You raised some good points here , the reason I started this thread was to see what people thought and personally I don't like the idea of things being forced on people , the freedom of choice should be there. Both my children eat a variety of food and my son could eat for England no matter what it is LOL, I am a junk food person, sausage, egg and chips at leats 5 times a week. Now we are all thin as I have said in my post thats why I think it's in your Genes. Regarding the mother with her obese son , may I put it another way, if the child was thin and was still unhappy cause he may of wanted to put a bit of weight and his mum still did the same with the sweets everyday, would you still be thinking the same thing ? Love is blind in many respects and yes some times what people might do for the love of their child might not be the right thing but to the parent it seems right. How many people have done things for the sake of their child and have been wrong afterwards, as I said i went through a dark period with my son which at times we jsut let him do what he wanted because we could not cope and we needed peace to recharge again, yes I went to social services and couldn't get help. But we made it through the bad times in the end and fingers crossed all is well now !!

Karen I can walk down any alley or aisle and eat whatever I like without piling on the pounds or being unhealthy, besides I choose to eat what I want to eat. I am lucky it's in my genes LOL !

One thing I would also like to add is , if there are bad diets like people have suggested and at the end of the day people make the decision on what that have read and learned, then how come the human race has lasted all these years. surely if the diet was as bad as what some people say then the human race would of nearly been extinct before all these so called experts came out suggesting your diet should be this or that. In my book people can do whatever diet they want to do, but a particular diet should not be forced onto any one. I think as I have said it is in the genes and if you are meant to be big, small, round or square and I think that is the case. I eat all the junk food and I am a size 29 inch waist and still tall and slim, all my family are like that, so how do the experts explain that. Yes all family eat more or less the same and they are all ok. But do the experts really know, for example my mother smoked 40 cigarettes a day and had a alchohol problem , she died at the age of 60. Nothing to do with smoking or drinking , she had died from a blood clot caused by a bang to the head. Do you know we donated alll her organs including her heart, liver, kidneys, and many more, not bad for a smoker of 35 years. Now the reason I bring that up is in my opinion is that the experts are not always right and I was using this as an example.

Was it on this site that I read that if you are a carer fr someone disabled you can ask for time off ? If that is the case can some please enlightment to what the law exactly says or where I may find it ?

Yes good point lil , perhaps they should also find out why the obese child that Baddad was on about was sad and really needed cheering up, perhaps if that was sorted out the mother would not have to bring sweets to cheer him up ?

Baddad I see what you are saying. I would like to say about the mum with the sweets, say you are having a bad time with your child , I mean take the time when my son was just driving over the top , this was when they were about to put him on Respididone, some nights i felt like i would like someone to come him and give him an injection to knock my son out and give us recovery time. We all do things to keep the child happy at times and some of those things people disagree with, so perhaps this is this way of keeping her child happy, her way of dealing with things. Her child is obese as you say, but who are we to judge, I know you said your child has thoughts, which he keeps to himself, but imagine how many people think things about autistic children when then see them and i know from experience how upset and annoyed i would get at people sstaring or maing comments. Who are we to judge how someone brings up a child or treats a child, I would say she is most probarbly a lvoing parent like a all of us on this site. Don't judge a book by its cover, which i think goes on too much in the world.

Did anyone see it ?

Thankyou Helen for that info it does seem an all round thing then