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Mother in Need

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Everything posted by Mother in Need

  1. Phoebe, I'd say so. Statements are divided into the following sections: 1. legal intro, child's detials etc. 2. special educational needs (so what needs the child has). 3. special educational provision (how they are supposed to provide for those needs) and then 4, 5 6, school placement, non-educational needs and provision. Under 2 my son's needs are under the following headings (with each being thoroughly detailed): 1. emotional and behavioural difficulties, 2. limited communication skills, 3. limited social interaction skills, 4. poor personal organisational skills, 5. motor coordination difficulties, 6. sensory difficulties, 7. medical difficulties. As you can see, there are no difficulties about learning itself, he is doing his first year of GCSEs and achieving As, yet he is in a unit and receives fulltime 1-2-1. under 3 there are general objectives which are then split into smaller ones to provide for, ie use of strategies to alleviate his anxieties, social skills programme, etc etc. Like you, I had never seen a statement till the LEA sent me their draft, and I too had no idea what to expect.
  2. I definitely wouldn't EVER take away a reward after it was given. Madness for any child, and with an autistic one can only lead to confusion, frustration, anger and aggression. I used to make those 'chips' on the computer, with the help of my two youngest who chose the pictures etc, then printed them out and cut them. They fit into my purse so I had them on me always, and when they had so many they could exchange them from items out of a small toy box I had made up. This worked for a while, till, as mentioned before, it was time to change things around again. I know how you're feeling, I am often so tired as well, I am also on my own with three boys with no family at all and very few friends, and NO-ONE who is able and/or willing to have my AS son for even a short time. Try to take care of yourself (I know, a lot easier said than done), just think that if you're too exhausted to cope then that would affect your son, and make his behaviour even worse which then turns into a vicious circle (if it doesn't feel like that already that is). Does he like to go out and be active, like going for walks or do sporty things? We discovered geocaching about a year ago, and it has made a huge difference to our lifes, it has taken us out of the prison that was our home as he was now willing to go out, and gave us something to do! We've even managed to go camping (first holiday for years and years) because of a geocaching event. (PS geocaching is like a treasure hunt, where you go look for a container with goodies using a GPS; there's a lot more to it, but this in short). I always have the problem of how to keep him occupied, I only need to go to the loo and he is bored again...someone has to be doing things with him to keep him motivated all the time.
  3. Nice to see this thread is still going. I am wondering if I should re-apply for my son, he only gets middle rate care and nothing else, and he has AS, ODD, diabetes type 1 and asthma, and is in a unit with full time 1-2-1. It seems a bit strange I didn't get higher rate, and also no mobility (I mean, how many 13 year olds walk on the street holding their mummy's hand, and are totally incapable of going anywhere by themselves all alone, or of being anywhere without adult supervision.... But it is all the hassle and time that I feel I can do without, and I don't know why they would suddenly give him higher care/lower mobility now when they didn't a year ago...
  4. Phoebe, you're welcome to read my son's, I re-wrote it myself as the LEAs was soooooooo wooly it was completely illegal. Because I cross-referenced EVERY change I made to all those reports that they should have used themselves, they couldn't really say it wasn't appropriate to my son and accepted nearly ALL of it, with the result that my son's statement is one of the most detailed statement anyone has ever seen (so they keep exclaiming anyway). You're welcome to read it, but I don't have it on the computer so would have to send it by normal post, which is fine with me. Pm me with your address if you'd like that.
  5. Sadly I went via the official complaints procedure, and once again got nowhere. Apparently yes they legally have to START an assessment, but they do not legally have to FINISH this, NOR do they have to supply for the needs that they have indentified, NOR do they need to follow up on their own action plans........ the amount of letters that have been sent on my behalf by professionals must bem aking his file pretty heavy, but to date we still have NO named social worker, nor any help whatsoever.
  6. My parental rep was the whole of 90 (yeah I know, ninety) pages long, but it seems to have made the difference between everyone saying there was nothing wrong with him and him now being in a special unit with FULL TIME TA support (1-2-1)! If you would like a copy, I can email it to you, that would give you a more thorough idea although ofcourse our children are always very different!
  7. Why the difference Blue-Kat? What is the actual difference between those two departments? First time I've heard of a Disabled Children's dept... I have been asking for help for years now, and have gotten nowhere. Assessments (both for my son and myself as a carer) were started twice, but NEVER finished, nor any help ever given, despite LOTS of pushing...
  8. Thanks all! They also said that they would, all three parties independently of each other, send letters to social services begging them for some help. With it coming from three sides at the same time, plus hopefully from the psychiatrist again as well, maybe........maybe......maybe I'd get some help. Won't hold my breath though, but I could sure use it to spend some time with my other two sons.
  9. Phoebe, as far as I know it is indeed supposed to be annually, though the LEA can bring this forward if they wish. In my school's case, they hold all their annual reviews in one week of the year, so as to book in the relevant professionals (not that they show up, but that's the idea). Here in Cornwall one professional can cover an area that's 100s and 100s of square miles and they spend a lot of time travelling. Eg the doctor that was there today, her office is a good hour's drive away.
  10. Exactly the same here, I too had to fight for 1 1/2 years, and only met brick walls all around, till I got a solicitor involved, handed in 90 page parental representation and (with the help of IPSEA) completely rewrote my son's draft statement. Now they are really working great with him, BUT I too find it hard to forgive and forget, and dread what will happen if the SENCO were to change again... At least he should be alright for the next year after this review, BUT I still don't feel I can relax as the current SENCO is already thinking of leaving and the unit he is in is only supposed to support children for up to 20 weeks and he is the first, one and only 'permanent' child....
  11. This morning I had my son's annual review (only 6 months after receiving his statement), and it went very well! There weren't many people there, just the SENCO, school doctor, Connexions Adviser, my son and myself; no ed psych, no LEA, no others who had been invited, but then for the review that was before ours, even the parents hadn't shown up... Anyway, it was decided to fully maintain all in the statement (incl the unit and 32.5 hours 1-2-1!), and to see if it was possible to find funding for after school activities as he really needs them for his social development (and for me to be able to spend some time with his brothers). All in all, a very good support, I was so relieved as I had been afraid that he would get less hours (he is expected As for most of his GCSEs next year)! And this from a school who wouldn't admit he had any additional needs at all just over a year ago!!! So everyone, please have hope, these things do happen, and situations can fully turn around for the good!
  12. My son is on respiridone and it has made a huge difference to our lives. He actually ASKS for the med twice a day, which shows how much he wants it as well. He has had NO zombie effects at all. There are loads of threads about this med and others in the medication section.
  13. Welcome to their world........ at least you're lucky enough that they are considering giving you respite at all....... Just watch when they see him, don't want to sound awful, but see if you can make him be on his worst behaviour while they're there, you know, stress him out beforehand (without them knowing ofcourse!). They need to see your problems to believe them, you can't believe the things they can come up with if they 'see' a 'normal' child that's well-behaved. whatever everyone else who knows the child says......... sorry, hope I am not making you worried here, I am only trying to help, him behaving badly might make a world of difference to what they end up providing.
  14. My AS son has 30 hours on his statement, but is getting the full 32.5 hours to cover ALL times.
  15. Hedders, I would personaly say to first get that pead to address your concerns re autism. IF your child is indeed on the spectrum, then you'll get a report. Show that to the school and ask them to cater for her individual needs, and apply for statutory assessment (with or without the school's willingness). The assessment will automaticaly involve the ed psych, and others, and show much clearer where her educational needs lie, and will hopefully get these covered. I couldn't get anywhere with both schools my AS son attended, TILL he had the 'label'. School still refused to assess, and I approached the LEA myself (well, via a solicitor actually). Despite school saying he had no additional needs, he now has 32.5 hours 1-2-1 and is in a special unit (and my county is not known for its generousness re statements and help of any kind). School is now cooperating (well, after the LEA told the school's governors to ******** and get on with it!!!!)
  16. I could speak German quite well, even spent 3 weeks over there speaking nothing but, but this was all quite some time ago. It feels pretty rusty. I am hapy to try and help, but I agree with the others that there are some very good self-learning tapes etc on the market (or the library) that can give you a grasp of the language pretty quickly (though this obvciously depends on the amount of time you have available, on your aptitude and motivation, etc); either way, if you are moving there, you'll NEED those skills. Believe me, Germans resent people living among them who do no speak their language! And those a bit more open-minded will simply respect you for trying!
  17. I see your point Pumpkinpie, but any other 'local' school involves driving and that is not always possible. It would also mean that I won't be back in time to pick my AS son up from the bus, and he is NOT able to walk home by himself (and even if he was, it wouldn't be safe as there are gangs who will pick up on the weak). At the moment I am simply abiding my time, R isn't even at school due to the bullying issue that still has not been solved satisfactorily, and we are simply enjoying some quality time together, something of which he normally gets so very very very little. I am awaiting an assessment by a clinical psychologist (but you know how long those things can take), and for R to first heal emotionally. By that time, maybe those assessments have actually taken place, and we are/might be one step forward......
  18. I know, I've been through that with my AS son, but my youngest isn't so bad he needs a statement, but what he DOES need is some help, acknowledgement of his problems, and maybe alternative ways of recording.
  19. Well, I've had the meeting but am still wacking my head on the wall. NO he is NOT on SA nor on SA+. They (the school) have no concerns whatsoever as he is already attaining the levels he should be attaining at the end of the next school year. Despite that his spelling and handwriting are illegible, that he misunderstands instsructions, and I could go on so, he is achieving and therefore there can't be anything wrong with him needing extra help of any kind. THAT is the school's point of view. The ONLY reason that they have referred him to SALT and to the Dyslexia advisor is because of MY concerns, they are PURELY listening to MY concerns (the fact that the screening test showed great cause for concern was somehow not mentioned...). This is the way they are holding off on anything and everything, and these specialists that were first supposedly coming in January (this month) but this has now somehow become February (with a quick 'should be' thrown in to cover themselves yet again). You may ask yourself, what does it matter if he is attaining so well anyway, but the crux of the matter is it DOES REALLY AFFECT him on a daily basis, apart from having lowered his self-esteem, and his spelling is so bad you can barely read what he has written, and it slows him down hugely. How is he ever going to do any of those GCSE tests (and SATS before that), handwritten, if no-one can read it? This has to be formally acknowledged and he needs help with this and related issues. I suppose there is nothing else i can do now till he has been seen, and then hope those specialists 1) know what they are doing and 2) do not have LEA quotas as to how many children are 'allowed' to be dyslexic ...
  20. Thanks for the info Smiley , I have just printed off loads of it to show the SENCO... And yes, I have already had to educate the LEA and the SENCO of my 13 year old's school, and now it's the next one. WE shouldn't have to police the system....
  21. My 13 year old gets taken to school by taxi, but not by a normal firm, they are all volunteer drivers and they are great, they do it to help people, not as a job. As for normal taxis not taking under 16s, that to me is total **** . How do you think a large proportion of 'normal' children in remote rural areas get to school? By taxi, without any adults whatsoever (driver not counted).
  22. Could anyone shed some light on this, the meeting is tomorrow, and it would be VERY helpful to know?
  23. Thanks ladies, I'll bring the COP and SEN toolkit with me to the meeting. I wonder if they have one? I think their main argument is going to be that according to them he doesn't need extra help as he is not that far behind, and therefore he doesn't need to be on SA or SA+, and least of all have an IEP. And I am still not sure if having been referred constitutes HAVING to be on SA or SA+.......??? The emphasis on the individual bit is real useful, because his teacher will not accept that if he is two years ahead in other subjects, and two behind in spelling, that really means he is 4 years behind his ability. Two is two according to him, and not three...
  24. The answer to that, I think, is: not a lot. The problem here as well is that this son in question, is not disabled like my son with AS, yes he has health problems and is dyslexic (though I don't know if they would formally say that, they have only said that there is cause for concern), but disability stuff won't come into it. Their web presence is minimal/pathetic, and I can't ask them at the moment as he is refusing to go to school due to bullying that they are not addressing in an effective manner, and I have told them I will keep him off school till the matter is sorted. I have sent an official letter to school AND the chair of governors about this, but (as before) have not had any response. I would really like to send him to a different school but apart from being somewhat impractical, it has taken me 2 years for them to recognise his dyslexia and refer him, and I don't want to lose all that............ To get back to my original query, if he indeed should be on SA+ or at least SA, then he should have an IEP and some sort of help with his spelling, whether he is 3 years behind or 2 ahead as he is in all his other subjects. Am I right in this? And what official rules back this up?
  25. Thanks Karen. My confusion is that I am not even sure whether he is officially on SA or SA+, as he has never ever had any help, nor have things been done differently for him, and he even gets told off for his spelling constantly during literacy lessons..... I have a meeting with the school about this on Tuesday, and would obviously like to know how far I can push them with the law, the Code etc. He has not got an IEP either, and his teacher keeps saying that 1) he doesn't need to have one because he is not 3 years behind, and 2) he hasn't got a clue what to put in it anyway as he hasn't got a clue how he could help my son, at least not till he has had some advice (which will take at least another month).... Can they refer a child without that child being on their SEN register (SA or SA+)?????
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