Lynden

In response to the original question I don't think it's doing my son a disservice taking him to these specialised activities for fun though as Lyndalou said - there still aren't actually that many. We still do regular activities where he is expected to have to cope and mix with other NT children so it's not like he will reach adulthood and have been sheltered, he will have learned, as much as possible, how to deal with life. I am perhaps coming at it from a different perspective though as his difficulties are such that he's never going to live a completely independent life so although he will need to cope, he will always have support.

Being aware of and able to identify and control your own emotions as well as being aware of and able to identify other peoples emotions. That's my understanding of it anyway and how we refer to it in our setting.

As Lyndalou said - these are all open to adults too, although many of the films are geared towards children, not all are and there have definitely been adults at the ones I've attended. I still expose my son to many things he finds challenging as I do agree he has to live in our world. I definitely welcome things that make his life easier though. I work for a centre that provides, amongst other things, support for adults with AS and am involved in a board that is setting our LA plan for supporting adults with ASD but I agree 100% that support is sorely lacking - no argument there.

I'm a bit surprised by the comments here. Surely the fact that places are recognising that some situations can be difficult for some people with ASD and are catering for that is a positive? Surely it's nice that our kids don't have to struggle through it or go without? I for one appreciate being able to take my son to something he really enjoys, knowing that at least some of the sensory issues he faces have been addressed. He does have additional learning difficulties and may not be able to reason through some things like those who are higher functioning. As a parent, it's also nice to be able to take your child out into an environment where they are not going to be judged. Incidentally, many soft play activity centres now offer time slots for those with SEN, and the NAS have an ASD friendly showing of the Lion King in London's West End in May. I know many adults on the spectrum who would have welcomed such things and who definitely would not agree that finding their way through life unhindered was the best course of action for them. Edited to add that none of these cost any more than the mainstream version so it's not necessarily about money.

We take my son to the showings. They suit him for several reason. a) you don't have to sit through adverts and trailers, it goes straight into the movie and he doesn't have to be quiet all the way through He's not overly noisy but he does a little commentary on the movie which might annoy some. The volume is also quieter which suits him as he is sensitive to loud noises. What did you want to know about them?

I think sometimes being on the spectrum can be a reason for behaviour, but never an excuse. For example my sons sensory issues and anxiety occasionally result in him displaying challenging behaviour. It's never an excuse for that behaviour though as being aggressive is not okay.

Everyone I know on the spectrum has some form of sensory processing difficulties but it is possible to have sensory processing difficulties and not be on the spectrum. A friends son has a diagnosis of SPD and he isn't on the spectrum as he doesn't have the social and communication difficulties inherent in ASD.

I know people who swear their children were developing normally until they were vaccinated. However, in our case L was definitely displaying many autistic traits before we even considered the MMR. He was informally diagnosis by a paed before he had his MMR. In my mind it's largely genetic though I don't doubt there are some environmental issues in some cases.

Hi Caroline It does sound like you would be entitled. The main thing you have to show is why his care needs are more significant than a child of the same age. Cerebra do a fantastic guide (http://www.cerebra.org.uk/English/getinformation/publications/Pages/DLAGuide.aspx) for filling in DLA forms - it's what I used the first few times I did them. The CAB can help but if you have any autism support groups in your area they can often offer support with form filling too. Lynne

Oh I'm glad you got the chance to go. For proper fans it must have been amazing. The guys in front of us were very excited at some of it. It made my husband feel nostaligic as he played them when he was young. We were in the arena in row 12 so had excellent seats. I love to hear how positively you talk about your Mum supporting you - I hope my son feels like that some day! He's only 9 at the moment and wouldn't cope with the crowds either due to anxiety but hopefully as he gets older he'll be able to cope slightly better. Take care Lynne

I've watched my husband play a couple, he played most of the earlier games. We went to the Distant Worlds 25th Anniversary concert at the Royal Albert Hall on Friday night. It was amazing!!

That's a massive generalisation! I know as many aspies who would consider their AS to be a challenge as a gift, I know plenty who embrace it. I know as many NT's who pay attention as don't. I know both NT and AS people who are ignorant, rude and money-grabbing. Surely it all comes down to individual personality. I don't think it's helpful to generalise about any sub-group of people. Lynne

Have you looked at crelling harnesses? They aren't cheap but they are very good quality and I know my friend who has a child who can get out of anything, can't get out of his. Lynne

Aww fab. It's so lovely when they do that

I think for many parents it's about making life easier for their children. Nothing to do with their child not being good enough but if you have a child on the extreme end of the spectrum that can't engage, aren't continent, can't form personal relationships, are constantly distressed - that's not really living is it? Just existing. It's about giving your child a better life. There are many children like that and I can understand why parents would want to change that. Personally I don't know if I would use a "cure" for my son - there are certainly aspects of his life that I would like to make easier, but I love him for who he is. I get a lot of feedback from my child though, he is incredibly loving, funny, and he is making progress. If we had a cure, would he be better or worse? Who could tell, and I'm not sure I'd want to find out. I do understand why some parents would though. Lynne

Whether to tell siblings or not is a very personal decision. We have always been honest with my daughter. My son was diagnosed just over 2, when she would have been 3.5 years old and even then we explained things simply ie 'your brothers brain works differently than yours so he doesn't understand that hurts'....type thing. As she's gotten older we've given her more and more age appropriate information and now at 10 she has a fairly good knowledge of autism, and of how it affects her brother. I think if your younger daughter is being affected by your older daughters behaviour it might be the right time to start explaining things - you can explain to her that her sister doesn't mean to be hurtful when she says things. The NAS have many books about talking together about autism. Just give her basic facts, don't fluff it up, just be honest HTH Lynne

If he's already being seen by a paediatrician - what's their perspective? An educational psychologist can't diagnose with autism, can just help advise on the best educational setting for your child. Diagnosis should come via the paediatrician or a clinical psychologist. 4 is absolutely not too young for assessment - my son had his formal diagnosis at 2 and 2 months although there is no questioning his diagnosis as he is severely autistic with additional learning difficulties. Good luck. Lynne

I have two kids and a hubby, work part time as a project manager for autism at a local support charity, and am doing my MEd in Special Ed (Autism Studies). I love baking, read a lot, pretty boring really! Lynne

I don't look at the negatives in my son, we recognise his limitations and try and help him overcome or work around them - I celebrate his achievements everyday, it's easier to look at the positives. It doesn't take away from the fact that he is disabled by his conditions though, autism included. To me, it's semantics, it's how you react to the person that matters rather than the label. I understand what you are trying to say and think it's the right attitude to have as people should focus on the positives. Lynne

I know mine, but only because I sat a Mensa test around 12 years ago as a laugh when my hubby sat one. I know I'm clever enough (good grades at school, degree etc), but I never thought I'd get in. It's not something I ever use or reference though. I think if I sat one now after having kids I'd struggle haha Lynne

My worry with removing the word disability is that it could result in a reduction in help for many people. My son is fabulous and is achieving lots, but there is no disputing the fact that he is disabled by his conditions (autism, hypotonia, hypermobility and developmental delay), there's no getting around that. It's not diversely able - there are somethings that he just can't do. We don't see him as his label though, we see him for the boy that he is. Lynne

Lots of things the others have said work and travel tablets definitely help. I'm 37 and still get travel sickness. Just last week I was travelling in the back of my parents car to my sisters wedding venue and had to get my Dad to swap so my Mum could get in the back and I could get in the front seat. If you are looking out of the front, and not the sides where things are zooming past it helps. Like Darkshine I don't get it when driving though but I suppose that's because you are focused on what you are doing. I get disorientated on planes when they turn, throw up on boats, and I can't watch anything on TV that's filmed documentary style without feeling nauseous (think Blair Witch style - I actually had to leave the cinema and throw up during that one!). Lynne

I wasn't sure initially but I actually thought it was pretty cool in the end. I got bored during the procession though! I love the fact that the Queen actually did her stint with James Bond

The centre where I work runs two adults ADHD support groups. They did have one but demand was so high they added another so they run twice a month now. They get incredibly good feedback. One facilitator has ADHD herself and the other is a coach but she has an adult son with ADHD. Lynne

Does he received speech therapy in his current school? The main questions for me would be - is he making progress in other areas? Is he able to communicate outside of speech? Approximately 50% of people on the spectrum never talk, and even when they do it might not always be appropriate. My son didn't talk at all until he was 6.5 years old. We often get asked what we/school did (he's in a school for children with severe learning difficulties). The answer is nothing we hadn't been doing for years previously - he just did. Many of his peer group in his specialist setting don't have speech but can communicate using symbols or sign. Although my son talks now and we get some appropriate language, we get a lot of babbled and echolalia too. Speech therapy is a much sought after provision in the UK and I know many people struggle to get it. If you are willing to pay for it privately you can, but it's notoriously hard to get in schools. Lynne