rainbow queen

just wanted to add he is on early years action plus at school-would this help towards form filling? i would also like to say i cant quite belive how we all seem to be getting fobed off,after reading many posts on this forum and me now going through exactly the same-its an utter disgrace i have to ask and question every thing -not once apart from here on this wonderfull forum does anybody in the authorities seem to inform you before u have to ask if it wasnt for this forum-i would be even more in the dark THANKS TO ALL THE INFO ON HERE EVERYONE

i know this may of been asked before so excuse me if im sounding dim-i did also read through the family fund post i sent of for the form-but not filled it in just wondered if i my son would fit criteria-as not sure because things have been mucked up he was on high rate care dla till this sept-for which i stupidly filled in other form-then all of a sudden its dropped to low rate i am waiting for my reassessment-rang them up and they r waiting for reports i now know u need to get help to do form and kind lady at crossroads team helped me do reassessment and told be go back to her whatever outcome is hes not dx aspergers but im certain he has it if only on the high end of it he has global developmental delay-and behavouril probs,currently waiting camhs appointment ,has salt,waiting for occupational in school,told teacher all concerns,been allowed to pick him up from front entrance-instead of with other parents, just that the pre school support worker begs to differ with me on his progress as he shows it all more at home and they recenlty sent me discharge summary from cdc dept and to be honest its trying to paint a better picture of him than it is so worried this will muck up the dla assessment-do u think its worth applying to family fund??? also moving house soon and my sons probs have helped to ensure a better move for us ie;we have no garden,and i cant take him out to park alot cause he kicks off etc,,,,,we need 3 bedrooms cause theres no way he can share with his younger brother,ect,,,,, would be gratefull to know what u guys think????thanks in advance x

my son hasnt been dx as yet- i voted the family members- my nephew has aspergers and tourettes,also ocd-he was only dx at 25 my mums sisters-daughter-her son has downs syndrome and autism my sons dads brother-his son has some form of autistic spectrum-not certain which as he lives abroad and i split up with there dad and didnt get to find out for certain. my sisters daughter has dyslexia and irlam syndrome[where they need coloured lenses-sorry know this isnt on autistic spectrum,but it seems its all bit connected as we all seem to have some thing ] and learning probs. i myself have had history of depression,and am dx with rapid cycling mood disorder and ocd-for which i take medication my other son seems ok up to now [hes 3]. have to say all this other stuff[autistic spectrum] really didnt come to light till i started looking into my sons behaviour,and when u search u find it is there in your family-or should i say u knew it was there but it tends to hit u in the face when u think your children may have it .

im talking about getting my son dx-am i missing something out or do they honestly not belive me? im getting so tired with all my explaining and lists of stuff,falling on deaf ears. appointment with autistic team speacilist speech therapist on nov 15, now let me guess?-i will have to repeat myself again-oh yeah and what will it lead to-nothing,if the past is anything to go by this is going to be same woman who my son saw when he was younger[hes 4 now] and back then all she said was some things my son dose are autistic others not. school is now involving occupational therapist[after id told them for 3 weeks-he will not manage at pe or writing/reading] all of a sudden they taking an interest after seeing his letter writing[like a spider on a page]. i live in north west area,and it seems folks in south get listened to more,or prehaps there just better trained

im also having similar probs with my 4 year old[as he is not dx-just read on previous post-this should be included in dx-should i tell my sons dr/camhs when appointment comes through?] he keeps pulling my sisters skirt up-and will not stop it when he gets going,in my case i think theres an element of sexuality as he smiles and laughs-not sure if this is poss at 4.but theres other things too that worry me he keeps trying to kiss me and his younger brother on lips-i think its because i used to kiss his head or cheek but since he started school this has happened-and im thinking some girl may of said you kiss on the mouth-and hes got this in his head now and i have resorted to saying"you only kiss girls on lips" not boys and mummys-but i can see this will also confuse the matter. is there any books i could get-on teaching these matters/and stranger danger-as he thinks everyones nice i try to be very open with him about all these matters as i belive this is better than hiding it away-its the getting it across without confusing him i have the prob with??? to top matters he said he wants to be a lady when he grows up-and he is serious too should i tell his dr this???

my son loves the adverts-"every little helps"[tesco] and all the slogans for shops and companys,he reels the words of in conversations, hes big fan of quiz programes like millionare,but at mo his favourite is "the paul o,grady show,hes only 4,and also loves the x factor and told me the other week,when he gets bigger he wants to be a lady on the x factor

im a single mum-[although my son hasnt been dx as yet but has global development delay and lots of probs which im certain is as]. i would say ive been single to parent to both my boys since they were born-although father was around a bit[he was no good],and i left him because he was abusive to me,so all in all ive done all the hard work on me own

oh yes and that about recieving presents-it all clicks more now[my son still dont have dx] but i never forget when his stepsister bought him a t shirt for his birthday-and he opened it and threw it down saying-i dont like it-and wouldnt say thankyou[even though he has good manners],i didnt know where to put my face cause back then didnt really understand him as much or as,but it all makes sense now :

talking of christmas,my son who is 4 still dont understand the whole father christmas thing,i once took him to see one at a school fare-which he hated and refused to sit on his knee-so now everytime i mention christmas to him or say father xmas coming soon-he only associates christmas with meaning the santa at the school fare is this normal??? he cant understand that make believe of him coming to your house on xmas eve makes me feel sorry for him

hi guys i attended a meeting last week about this happening,everyone was up in arms about it,and people were arguing back at the education officials,they also tryed avoiding questions about it,then we had to split into groups to put our side across and what we thought of it,parent partnership were there too. i think its wrong-how are they going to train all the staff and teachers to deal with children who have as or other disabilitys-as all mainstream kids will be together with special needs,i cant see it working. my son was ment to go to a special school-then at last min they change minds and say hes doing well ,hes ok-hes at mainstream only been there 4 weeks[not dx as yet-still persuing it,but has global developmental delay].i found out at this meeting that the special school is going to be shut down-i feel this is why my son was pushed into mainstream[saying hes alright] cause they had that in the pipeline already and never told me

hi- my son hasnt been diagnoised yet[and i certain it could be aspergers],but he is labelled as having global developmental delay-i also didnt know much about i e p,or the whole process you have to go through-anyway i had appointment with my sons speech therapist [who calls in mainstream school],and i asked her about it all,as i also had concerns of my son[whos 4 ,been at reception class 4 weeks now], and how he will manage reading and writing.she said he has an iep,but it needs to reveiwed as i have voiced further concerns with her about his lang skills,she told me it is a plan with targets on it that my son needs to meet-if he dont ,he gets put on another type of plan,and if thats not working,he may get a statement then[as he hasnt at mo]. i have found out through experiance and this wonderfull forum that if you dont ask-no one tells you anything-so dont hold back,demand to know,i find it usual now to write it down before hand,so i make sure i cover all i wanted to say[memory is awfull-but also find dealing with people hard],i can get out on paper much more that i want to say-as i find these people you have to deal with are quick to sidetrack you,and talk you down alot.

have to say my 4 year old is same with me-he shouts alot at me,and trys to control me alot too,but it tends to be when hes stressed over some thing,which is like nearly all the time got,he never has been able to wait for anything [even his milk when he was a baby]. it dont click with him when i say im just busy doing this first -then i will do it

had to laugh at your post -our pool is very same,i have been taking my son and 2 half year old every week,just to get them used to water,and u never seen nowt like the carry on in the family changing room its positivly stressful,theres only me[parent] and if anyone could see me trying to change them both,and me at same time theyd kill themselfs laughing-then theres the locker capper,then the wee wee coming out-need loo[yuk i wouldnt touch the floor with a barge pole-let alone the toilet] i think us lot are noisy lot in locker room,-i just cant contain my swear words at all i think they are relieved when we go home,lol last week the same woman was there as week before-you should of seen look on her face when we all got in again last week [my younger son kept following her around splashing her ] im giving it a break this week-have to stock up on valium for next visit

it took my son ages too,he is 4 now and still in nappies at night, he also wont wipe his bum after a poo poo, i made a sticker chart for him and put it in bathroom,i also bought a large box of celebrations chocs and said he could have 1 for a wee on loo and 2 for a poo,it took hours of making him sit there[i think he was scared of leeting the poo go down toilet]. so i bought a tin of prunes and with those injection things u get with medicine i gave him few doses of the juice about 10 mins before trying him on loo- it did work cause it ensured he pooed and when he first got over the fact he can let poo go in loo- he was happy.

hi guys,i too am having this problem,he only started school 3 weeks ago,and from day one ive had the same carry on with him when i pick him up,its like jekly and hyde he leaves the teachers arms smiling then he starts on me asking what r we doing next?ect,,,,,question,question then BANG all hell breaks loose,everyone staring looking at me like sh*t,as if tut cant u control your kid then this mon he was so aggresive with me [4],i managed to drag him down street to me mums he pulled me through door,and i cut all me legs open had to go drs for antibiotics and tetenus jab. so marched up school ,ranted at teacher,said i cant take this no more,so she said she would ask head if i could pick him up 5 mins early before others come out[swear its all the crowds of people and noise that triggers him off]. got news back this week off head she said no cant do it-its evading the issuse-but u can come in at 3 through main entrance take him out that way,so tried it [big scene followed as to why we r now going other way],done it couple times was ok,but TODAY, he was hitting me ,refusing to walk and screaming past the head teachers office,she came out told him off,we got outside he refused to walk, head came out again telling him off,and told me shes going to do a sticker chart with him to behave well on his way home [i thought YEAH RIGHT sure that will work NOT and ive told my sons teacher that i think he has as.

hi guys im on anti depressants cipramil, 18 months back was also put on a mood stabler[have myself been dx as having rapid cycling mood disorder and obession compulsion disorder] i am under a phychatrist- but she agrees that alot of this has been triggered off or developed worse because of the way my son is[i mainly talk about my son when i go see her] always had bad nerves but coping with 2 boys on me own eldest is just 4 [hes the one have probs with] and nearly 3 year old has really put a strain on me-mentally and emotionally,plus physically. To make matters worse my youngest son is copying my eldest behaviour as he thinks its normal,so its hard trying to stop that happening too. i am hoping when i get a dx i will feel alot better about everything as at moment its driving me nuts trying to tell everyone that i belive my son has aspergers,at times it feels you know more than the ###### professionals,surely they can see giving a dx would help everyone involved,cause at the mo its like no mans land xxx

hi loulou, my son also finds upsetting things funny too,[he has no dx at present-so im just going off stuff ive read] but apparently this is normal for children with aspergers,as they dont understand the different feelings that come with different situations like we do,-or they can not learn the social behaviour thats approperate to say like a upsetting thing, where as we learn this from young,its like they can not learn this naturally,the best thing is to just keep explaining why its not right to laugh at it,just like your doing. my son finds it really funny to hurt his younger brother,the other wek he had a pillow over his head and was giggling about it,at the time i thought it was macarbre and i felt disturbed by it- but the more i learn about aspergers the more i relise he isnt actually doing it on purpose,and that makes me feel a bit better over these things.xxx

i know this sounds a bit negative but i was just wondering how all you guys cope mentally yourself?? although i myself have had a history of depression -i swear down my son and the difficultys that have arisen with him,have more or less nearly brought a nervous break down on me i take antidepressents and a mood stabilser to help me cope,i know my poor lad cant help it but i really do have to grit my teeth with some of the day to day mayhem that comes up,i live for my bath at night with lavender oil i just wondered how the rest of you cope with all this?? any tips or help gratefull thanks x

on this subject-my son is also very strong when hes having a fit of rage,hes only 4 and it worrys me about what he will be like when he is older.only on monday he caused me an accident he was refusing to go in my mums house and was fighting with me,i struggled picking him up,and he dragged me down with his weight,i went head first through the open door with my son underneath me[luckly i put my arms out so he didnt get crushed] but i fell bang down hard on the door frame and cut my legs real bad-i can hardly walk-its right on the leg bone,incidently i went drs today about it-had to have antibiotics as he said the big hole in my legs were now infected,got to go back in a week. the best of it is it didnt really sink in with my son what he had actually caused. i can see me having more probs like this with him in future,extremley worries me as i am also single mum[not big built myself].

hi guys, im a single mum to 4 year old[global developmental delay/possible aspergers/awaiting camhs] and also my other son whos 3 this nov. im the same too- if i was ill id have no one to look after them[hence going have flu jab this winter,and take lot of vits] i had to leave there dad as it was a abusive relationship,now nearly 3 years since been on me own,boys have no contact with him at all. no life other than me boys/and me computer[godsend],have recently started attending church,to try and get my son into sunday school, did have short friendship last year but he could not deal/accept my older sons behaviour ect..... have given up on men,my sons need me and i am trying my best to be a good mum,although must admit my sons problems/outbursts,ect...........is slowly grinding me down,have got very depressed due to it too. everyday i hope for a better one.

thanks again for your advice,was shocked about the cam corder issue, good job you told me,its so frustrating only wanted other people to see how my son behaves when hes with me and family.each day is a huge battle with him,nothing is simple,and he argues with me all the time[screams] over words and sentances which he feels arnt either right or misunderstands it[i really dont know what it is]. got such big issues with him changing from one place to other,i cant speak to people in my house cause he wont let me,everything has to be planned out and i darnt go back on nothing or all hell breaks loose. numerous other things go on too,put it this way i have no life,and all this screaming and problems is really depressing me,and my other 2 half year old son[as he gets it in the neck all time of his brother]. i hope things will improve,but i dont seem to be able to get people to listen,or should i say they dont understand what im trying to say.i been in seen his teacher,gave her lists of what probs im having with him,she said only thing she sees at mo is when hes asked to do something he starts shaking[hes only been there 3 weeks]. hes coming out of school with his jumper on wrong way ,shoes on wrong feet,trousers up his legs,after p.e[and i told them he cant dress himself very well]. he major kicks off with me when i collect him-wondering if its all noise of kids and parents,he dont like people walking behind him on footpath,takes me nearly hour to get home sometimes and its a 10 mins trip.

thanks every one for the replys,i have gathered my evidence as in lists of stuff my son has done since young and the ongoing new stuff too,am also considering camcordering him ,wonder if anyone else has done this to show for evidence? i keep all the letters and papers i receive about him.the hospital pediatrician has done the referral for camhs. one other thing that's puzzling me he is referred to as being on special education register,though he has no statement,im wondering what exactly they will have written down on file about him?? is this because hes only started mainstream school this sept and they need to see how he copes?

hi just post short note on my probs,this is my first post. my son is 4 and i am certain he has aspergers he still has no diagnosis,only global developmental delay,he has been under the child development since 1,they did a little test on him for autism and said some things maybe are others not,he is behind a year in speech and lang skills and other stuff like motor skills ect..............at first they said he would go speacial school now as he progressed well in child development groups the education woman said hed be ok in mainstream.after many appointments and letters and struggling and seemling talking to a brick wall,i have started to stand up for myself and told them not happy with all this vague cr*p want some at done want a diagnosis,after seeing his dr at hospital he now has refered me to camhs,awaiting appointment now,am i going down right road for a diagnosis? my gp said she can not refer me elsewhere for one cause he still under my hospital. 4 years ive been at this now,he drives me crazy at times and have read alot of your other posts and they all nearly match up with what my son dose ect...........,my nephew has at only 25 years old been diagnoised with tourettes,aspergers and obbesion complusion disorder- how bad is that 25 years its took,and its only cause it came about the probs im having with my son that my sis pushed for help for him as mainly they have struggled with him on there own[now he is being helped]. i have just had talks with his teacher told her what i think,he has no state ment and dr is waiting to see how his first term goes,teacher was quite good and did seem to listen but i am baffled that i seem to do all the ###### work for them,i mean u would think his dr would of raised these points with teacher but no she wasnt aware of it only that he has probs and is only speacial ed regestir.anyway get the feeling i am not being belived,as he dont show alot in hospital /school environment,but sure shows it at home,and everywhere else, ANY HELP ADVICE ??? WOULD BE GRATEFULL thanks guys,xxx