Rhys' Mum

That's exactly what Rhys needs I feel. He needs to be shadowed constantly by someone who knows what signs/triggers to watch for, & exactly the best strategies to use. The lady who supports him is lovely, & has lots of pre-school experience, but as I keep stressing to his SENCo, they need proper trainning. I don't think it's too much to ask, it can only benfit everyone involved surely?

Gosh, you've got your hands full... I wonder every now & again if my youngest may have the same condition, but it's more likely to be 'learned' behaviour. Starting pre-school/nursery often helps settle kids down, & people tend to find their children behave different at school than they do at home (they love to play up for their mummy's don't they!) Rhys didn't 'settle' down, or get worn out, & he behaved the same at nursery as he did at home; you just have to wait & see I guess. Good luck with it though, I'm sure he'll thoroughly enjoy it.

His initial nursery documented everything; he was then given funding to go to a more specialised nursery, & again everything was documented & he was given an I.E.P. He started school in January, & prior to that the school (his teacher & the SENCo) came to visit him at the nursey & Rhys had visits to the school. His school have been supportive, but on their terms. He's got "1:1" support, but only until lunch time! They've put him on School Action Plus, & did agree to get him statemented; but they've since gone back on that. I've got a meeting with them this Tuesday to discuss/push for statementing - wish me luck!

It's a fair comment, but in Rhys' case, he does also demonstrate other trates for Aspergers; allbeit on the mild end. Before he went to nursery I did just put it down to him being a boisterous boy, as he was my first & I had nothing to compare his behaviour too. His nursery however, came to me with concerns they had, certain signs that perhaps there was something more underline. I do hope every day that it is something he will grow out of, but frustratingly, he is getting worse the older/stronger he gets. I try not to stress about it, but you worry about them so much, & want to help "fix" any problems. It's hard.

I've not heard of those conditions before; but then I'd not heard of Aspergers before Rhys saw his consultant for the first time! I will look into it, as he is so young still, it is hard to pin point it fully; so it's worth looking at. Thank you very much.

Sorry, silly me, would be helpful wouldn't it! A diagnosis for Aspergers.

I agree, there is always a trigger that you can usually spot. This is why I keep telling his school he needs support full time, from someone with ASD experience/trainning! It would make the world of difference, which we've seen when he was moved to a more specialised nursery. He had constant 1:1 support from a lady with years of experience. She didn't crowd him & let him do his own thing, but she never took her eyes off him & was always close enough to step in when needed. I've tried to give suggestions of triggers or offer advice to his school, but they seem to take offense & get quite defensive about their staff & practices. Thank you for your reply, I'll talk to them again about strategies. :0)

Rhys' behaviour what picked up at your boy's age; that's when Early Education Years came to see him at nursery, also Surrey Portage Play (who are invaluble) got involved; then he was put forward to the children's unit at the hospital by our doctor. It all moved quite smoothly to be honest, so I was lucky in that respect; & because his nursery couldn't really cope, he was given funding to go to a more specialised nursery with ASD experience, which did him the world of good. It just feels now that he's floundering now at shcool in terms of his social interaction. What help are you getting with your son; or do you know who you can contact? Your GP should be able to help. Thank you for your reply; I know where you're coming from!

Rhys is also on School Action Plus, & I've been in constant contact with the SENCo at his school. The school were looking to have him statemented, which is something the school & I agreed would be best, to get funding for him to have full time 1:1 support; but they've since gone back on that! A behavioural specialist went in to observe him, & I think off the back of that, they've decided "Getting Rhys statemented will make little difference at this time"!!? How they can say that when he's doing so much damage with the part time support that he currently gets! The support teacher he currently has, lovely as she is, does not have any ASD trainning. It's all very well reading up all the data his previous nursery gathered, or reports from previous specialists; but if you don't have the right trainning, you can't fully understand the condition. Anyway; I have an appointment with his school this coming Tuesday, so I'll be pushing that point. I'd been getting quite depressed about picking him & being given a list of things he'd done wrong; I was being made to feel that I had to apologise for my son & they way he is. I then felt guilty that I wasn't backing is corner as it were, that I was letting him down. I arranged to have a parent/school communication book, so his teacher could just right about his day, rather than talking about it all in front of him. His teacher does use the book, but she still stands there & goes over the worst of his behaviour! Sorry - having a moan now... It's just so frustrating isn't it; I want to help, to try to provide answers or solutions for his school, but fact is, this is the way he is - what can I do? It's the constant aggression that's really getting me down. Do I just have to accept that it's something that can't be changed, & watch him constantly, be by his side to step in etc at all times? How do you manage you little boy? :0)

My son Rhys will be 5 in July, so he's been given a "working" diagnosis due to him being so young. He's on the mild end of the scale, & we've been having intervention since he was 2 & half (nursery spotted signs). He is a very friendly, fun loving & out going little boy; but he has no real understanding of when to stop, or draw a line for himself, or when to stop. He also has no fear strangers, & goes off quite happily without me or anyone about. If he's got something in his mind, then he has to follow it out. If over excited or over stimulated, or upset/cross, his emotions leap in the blink of an eye & he has very aggressive & loud outbursts. His behaviour is the same at home, as it is a school, & I worry that his school don't really fully know how to handle him. He's causing harm to other children at least 3 times a day (usually more!); he also has very destructive tendencies, & gets very silly/naughty when being told off. I'm worried that he's really going to seriously hurt someone soon, as he's using sharpened pencils, scissors, knife & fork etc at school - all potential weapons in his hands! He does a lot of face/cheek grabbing, pushing, shoving, shouting, jumping, bumping, pulling, screaming & growling - all of which can be reactions for negative & positive emotions. He is a very clever boy; he is able to talk to you about concequences etc, like he knows the right thing to say, but when it comes to it, he's not able to stop & think! He is very aggressive at home as well, to his younger brother (Nicholas, 2 yrs old). They love each other, & can play very well, but Rhys is not able to be patient, or tell me or my husband if there's a problem. He acts on impulse, & he gets very upset when we talk about it, that he can't stop hurting people. He's never been invited to a birthday party, or to a friends house, & the older he gets, the more aware he'll become. At the moment, he's blissfully unaware of any problems or upset he may cause; but I am so desperate for him! What can I do????

My son Rhys will be 5 in July, so he's been given a "working" diagnosis due to him being so young. He's on the mild end of the scale, & we've been having intervention since he was 2 & half (nursery spotted signs). He is a very friendly, fun loving & out going little boy; but he has no real understanding of when to stop, or draw a line for himself, or when to stop. He also has no fear strangers, & goes off quite happily without me or anyone about. If he's got something in his mind, then he has to follow it out. If over excited or over stimulated, or upset/cross, his emotions leap in the blink of an eye & he has very aggressive & loud outbursts. His behaviour is the same at home, as it is a school, & I worry that his school don't really fully know how to handle him. He's causing harm to other children at least 3 times a day (usually more!); he also has very destructive tendencies, & gets very silly/naughty when being told off. I'm worried that he's really going to seriously hurt someone soon, as he's using sharpened pencils, scissors, knife & fork etc at school - all potential weapons in his hands! He does a lot of face/cheek grabbing, pushing, shoving, shouting, jumping, bumping, pulling, screaming & growling - all of which can be reactions for negative & positive emotions. He is a very clever boy; he is able to talk to you about concequences etc, like he knows the right thing to say, but when it comes to it, he's not able to stop & think! He is very aggressive at home as well, to his younger brother (Nicholas, 2 yrs old). They love each other, & can play very well, but Rhys is not able to be patient, or tell me or my husband if there's a problem. He acts on impulse, & he gets very upset when we talk about it, that he can't stop hurting people. He's never been invited to a birthday party, or to a friends house, & the older he gets, the more aware he'll become. At the moment, he's blissfully unaware of any problems or upset he may cause; but I am so desperate for him! What can I do????