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trekster

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Everything posted by trekster

  1. You might want to consider reporting the school to Ofsted for the way they have severely distressed and humiliated your son and your family. But then again you might want to just leave the situation and start again. Thank you for being an advocate for your son and others on the spectrum. It is much appreciated. I'm hoping for a school that will see your son for his talents not his disabilities. take care
  2. http://www.nas.org.uk/services/england/yorkshire.aspx Link to services offered by the National Autistic Society in your area. http://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/drugs-and-treatments/ecotherapy/useful-contacts/find-ecotherapy-near-you/yorkshire-and-the-humber/ Link to services offered by Mind in Yorkshire and Humberside area. There is also the mind infoline. "Mind Infoline Our team provides information on a range of topics including: types of mental health problem where to get help medication and alternative treatments advocacy. We will look for details of help and support in your own area. Contact us Our lines are open 9am to 6pm, Monday to Friday (except for bank holidays). 0300 123 3393 info@mind.org.uk Text: 86463 Mind Infoline Unit 9 Cefn Coed Parc Nantgarw Cardiff CF15 7QQ" Advice from the mind helpline. "What can I do if a friend or relative will not seek help? Sometimes you might feel that a friend or relative is becoming unwell and want them to seek help from a professional or other source, but they will not always agree. There can be many reasons why people might refuse to seek the help that you feel they need: It could be that they want to solve their issues on their own, and see professional help as a weakness. They might actually be taking steps to find support already but not feel comfortable telling you about this Sometimes people who have had a bad experience with a GP or other support service in the past can be reluctant to try the same route again. For some people, a symptom of their mental health problem is a lack of awareness that anything is wrong. This is usually called a lack of insight, and is common in people diagnosed with schizophrenia or bipolar disorder. It is important to try to build trust and communicate positively with the person so that you can both understand where each other is coming from. It is common to feel frustrated if you think someone is not trying hard enough to get well, but try not to make assumptions about how they feel. If you are able to make time to have an honest conversation and show them that you value what they are telling you it can be easier to move forward together. If the person you care about is unable to recognise that they are unwell you can still try to build a trusting relationship. Focus on trying to identify with the emotions that they are expressing and the things that they are most concerned about, rather than the things that are most concerning for you. This might help you to agree that asking for extra support and treatment could be helpful."
  3. Welcome to the forum Are there any post diagnostic help in your area? Any support groups run by the National Autistic Society? If you let me know which county you live in I can do a search to see where your nearest support group is. There is also the mindinfoline which I have found really understands and support people on the autism spectrum.
  4. I appreciate this was sometime ago but what I have to share might still help you. Are you in a banding which you feel suits your current situation? By that i mean were you given a banding that reflected your physical and mental state at the time of applying? There are ways of appealing your banding but there can be consequences of being in a higher band. In my county Band A is for those who are currently homeless. Band B is for people who are at risks of homelessness, are living in 'unsuitable housing' eg documented abuse at home or from neighbours, who couldn't climb the stairs are in housing that adversely affects their physical or mental wellbeing note this has to be more than being lonely because of where you live. If you are in Band A you have to accept any home that is offered to you. If you are in Band B and make bids you have to accept any home offered to you. Checking whether there are any suitable houses to bid on each week is something anyone on the housing register is expected to do. If you do not bid within a set timeframe of registering online they can take you off the housing register and you have to apply again. Are there any professionals that know you well who can write supporting letters to back you up? Your GP, social worker, care agency, mental health services, autism service? Any recent medical letters which you can use which specifically mention your housing needs? Have you been on the Shelter website to try and work out your rights? http://england.shelter.org.uk/get_advicethere is also a Scotland branch (i cannot remember if you are in England or Scotland) http://scotland.shelter.org.uk/get_advice Think about where you want to live and what you can compromise on. To qualify for your home care with minimal disruption staying in your county is advised. Registering for a different county to the one you are in (unless you can prove you need to move for medical treatment or to care for a relative/ a relative to care for you) is virtually impossible. My first home was 2 roads down from my grans so i could walk round to hers if i felt i needed anything or i was lonely. I moved out when i had neighbour abuse, then other stuff went wrong which i wont go into on here.
  5. See if you can get some advice from your local branch of the national autistic society. Also check out sensory integration disorder or sensory processing disorder. There is also the autism helpline
  6. Anytime hope it helps. There is also the online forum aspievillage which does uk wide meet ups.
  7. http://www.saas.uk.com/ It's a society in Staffordshire for adult autistic and asperger folk.
  8. Hello I would contact your local branch of the National Autistic Society and ask for them to recommend an autism friendly GP. Then change your GP to that one straight away.
  9. Would it help to send the school some details on the "too much information" campaign? http://www.autism.org.uk/get-involved/tmi/map.aspx?gclid=Cj0KEQjwyozABRDtgPTM0taCrKsBEiQATk6xDl4xxSksJhALrLaRSDinvltJDdGQeClCX0Il72ZcHUcaAo_i8P8HAQ Can you get a Statement or assessment of need (SEN) from an educational psychologist? Have you been to the Headteacher or the school or governors? I have very sensitive sometimes painful hearing myself, anxiety makes it worse (school was bad enough for that) as does aspartame in food and drinks (especially sugar free stuff). Another thing that might help is Auiditory Integration Therapy (AIT) or the Tomatis Listening Program. The idea is the frequencies of sounds which people on the spectrum can't cope with. Hope you find a workable solution for your son soon.
  10. Hi Graham It sounds like Mandy could have complex PTSD alongside her autism. Despite what some MH authorities try to say you can have autism/aspergers and complex trauma at the same time. Although you are trying to help your friend, i don't appreciate the label 'naughty children'. They could have been abused, autistic, neglected or something else. Emotional Behavioural Disorders (EBD) is the politer term. I've had bullies and EBD kids pick on me at school as well. The cold water dumping is to stimulate the vague nerve as it slows the heart rate down. However using it as a punishment is really nasty. I've had really bad meltdowns in the past, some of these have been helped with medication (low therapeutic dose of Risperdal as other types of medication tend to trigger off my anger), some with EMDR (a form of treatment for CPTSD which is expensive and a nightmare to obtain on the NHS), others by avoiding gluten, dairy and benzoates (took a year to get out my system with nasty but worthwhile side effects) and also physical pain medication and physiotherapy. I still have problems such as rejecting any form of pressure from people including folk who i have felt supportive in the past. Regaining trust after mine (and also in Mandy's case) experiences can be a lifelong process. Your way of handling her meltdowns is the best way it is really difficult to snap me out of mine at times. But they're are much lesser because a) my main abuser is dead i have a CPTSD diagnosis and c) i have a treatment plan which i keep prodding the NHS to take responsibility for implementing. It is a myth that people on the autism spectrum are unable to empathise, we do empathise it just doesn't work properly or as well as so called normal people. The thirst for knowledge in trauma survivors can be never ending and I hope you can continue to support and help her. As a moderator i am asking how are readers going to know if Graham is posting or Mandy is posting? it would be preferable for you both to have separate accounts on here. Hope my post makes sense, feel free to ask if there is anything you don't understand.
  11. Try looking on your university or college libraries website? There is normally a search function in there, put in "AQ test and distribution". Another option is to try the National Autistic Societies website.Or even looking at their campaigns. "Don't write me off" or "Too much information".
  12. Problem is not every website records whose been where or if the same person has accessed the AQ test more than once. I could have taken the test at University, home, the library or a friends house and be recorded as 4 people when in fact I am one person.
  13. There was a lot of difficulty motivating me to do things. The world was too scary, too fast, too much and hiding in my room was a safer solution. However this as you realize can't work long term. It must feel like you are loosing your daughter to her aspergers at times? I have been through many breakdowns and difficult times with both my gran and mother. I attempted to live in the community, but a social services team unwilling to support my former housemate to find the help she needed in one setting and a neighbour with dangerous dogs in another setting meant after 10 years of attempting 'independent' living i was forced to move back home. My mother is aspergers in denial, no diagnosis and very difficult to motivate. She thinks of me trying to move out as trying to leave her. I find looking for any articles from the National Autistic Society can beneficial when im stuck with nowhere to turn. http://www.autism.org.uk/about/benefits-care/community-care/adults/england.aspx In some areas your daughter is more likely to get support, in other areas yourself as a carer is more likely to get support. Could she be supported in the family home until she is ready to move on so she only has to cope with one major change at a time? There is also your local parents and carers group in the National Autistic Society if there is one, try looking up {"autism services" + (your county)} for more information. Hope you find a workable solution soon, if you can access CAHMS there could be family therapy as an option depending on your area. Feel free to send me a private message if you need anymore advice.
  14. Steverogers i commend you for sticking with this thread, at the time you didn't realize this was a sensitive subject for folk. Something i learnt a few years ago is that self neglect is a form of self harm. i am pleased you have the support you need regarding how to look after yourself. i can understand you wishing to pass that information onto others.
  15. Part of autism can be to cause offense without realizing. i have been on 'both sides of the fence' regarding this matter. You had good intentions but for some reason your wording was taken the wrong way by people. It is a very sensitive subject. There are courses where you could learn more about autism and how it affects people, some are run online. i am half Liverpudlian, gran is from Everton so i supported the other team ;-), that's my point the Liverpool way is often to make jokes about things that wouldn't happen down south where i now reside. i managed to reject some of my upbringing to an extent and try to pick up and keep the habits of my grandmother before she died. i am also from a working class background but have managed to go to university and nearly have my masters degree. im in my late 30s. It took guts to apologise and it is a skill to keep. I hope you continue to use the forum. If you wanted to start a thread on general discussion of "is this a scam?" feel free.
  16. How do you know whether we are trying to 'pass' or 'blend in' though? Any effort we may be able to make would cause secondary mental health problems which would be hard to hide. Trying harder to blend in wont be the answer to avoid being taken advantage of. Yes folk affected by autism can be socially naive and that upsets me the most that there isnt an effective strategy to counteract this (resulting in bullying, abuse and many secondary mental health problems) because every situation is different. All i can suggest is that we make a thread "is this a scam" or "scam alert" and find ways to help each other rather than suggesting we 'just try harder'.
  17. I hope you PIP assessment goes well today. Do you have someone who understands your needs and wishes to support you? i have supported a friend to have a home assessment in the past. There is always a route towards a mandatory reconsideration then an appeal if it doesn't work out. i took a support worker with me to my PIP assessment and i'm still awaiting the results. i was sent a letter a few weeks ago saying "we are still assessing your claim" and my claim for my DLA is due to end in November. i know this is easier said than done but we have to keep carrying on doing what we can to function in the world. i like your posts sharing hobbies and interests keep them up.
  18. Hello Anne Welcome to the forum, i hope you find some online support here. i have personal experience of some of the disabilities that you listed (i don't experience (PCOS). It is great you would like to help others in return for them helping you, that's a trait to keep and develop. i have tried using supplements and diet to help with my fatigue and energy levels. They help to some extent i just struggle to keep up with the regime. Ironically i have difficulties remembering my own routines and developing new ones is extremely difficult. Fear of messing up is a major problem for me. i have to some extent managed my energy and pain levels. The best advice i can give is keep asking questions on here and hopefully someone will be able to help you provide a workable solution. No problem unresolvable even if we cannot see the solution right away.
  19. My only issue with the way you mentioned about letting someone know their personal hygiene is less than adequate by NT standards is that a long winded list of instructions is likely to be forgotten by someone on the spectrum.
  20. Welcome I can't tell from your post what area of the uk you are in? I find asperger social groups are better for me than mainstream activities.
  21. Does he have hidden pain which is being communicated by his behaviour? This was until recently the way I communicated pain or hunger for that matter.
  22. Can you get bose noise cancelling headphones? Could you access an autism support group in your area to find friends? If you can get to bath I run a group in a cafe once a month. PM me for details.
  23. A number of things helped with my angry behaviour. 1, going off antidepressants because I reacted paradoxically to them. 2, avoiding all gluten dairy and benzoates in my diet and other non food products. 3, adding in supplements like 5htp, b vitamins, vitamin d3, omega 3s, probiotics Also anger was the only way I could communicate physical pain at one point. I didn't know I was angry due to pain until the pain was treated. I've hypermobility syndrome which I believe your son has as well cmuir?
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