tired and fed up

Hello Cardiff Mum Thanks ever so much for your words of encouragement, I was thinking of writing a letter of complaint but not sure if it's worth the energy, think I might just start to take all this with a pinch of salt, after all I've coped this long without any help what difference will it really make?

Hello Cardiffmum I have just recently joined the network too, hope that you get there with the school. I have had similiar negative issues with my little girl, school punish her because she fidgets and "mutters" alot even though she's not directing it anyone. It's hard when you have to explain to someone the negative side of your child but then you end the conversation by saying how lovely your child is, I think sometimes people see a parent as being deluded lol I have been told "off the record" that they suspect my little one is on the high end of the spectrum or has "traits" can't wait to get through the process so that we can finally start dealing with the important bits

I'm not much use Im afraid as Im actually going through the process with my 6 year old daughter BUT I just wanted to say that I think your taking the step in the right direction by even exploring the idea that Aspergers might relate to you and coming here and sharing it of course Good Luck!

cup

Thankyou I shall try It's hard to not try to do everything especially when some idiot comes and tells you how ###### you are....and all you want to do is the best lol It's really annoyed me what the ed pshy said to me! I see these parents who live around me, kids filty shouting and carrying on at them for nothing, smacking them so they fall on there backsides...and I think Have I missed something here?

Hello again everybody Thanks for your welcomes to the group, hopefully I'll be of use to someone soon when I've got through some of the hoops of the system...untill then thankyou for your support!

Hello sally44, The peditrition knows all about her sensory needs (she made me laugh when we went to the first appointment as I hadn't noticed but she had half a toilet roll wrapped around her leg under her knee socks, which fell out when the ped asked her to take her socks off), she's not mentioned anything about an OT assessment of her. Im glad that you mentioned about the variation with the sensory needs, It's exactl;y like that in our house she might go nuts at the dishwasher because the cycle starts as she's walking past it but will happily bounce on balloons/ jump and fight with her dad but go nuts if anyone even touches her. These are the kind of things that kept making me question the whole thing! So very contridictory! "got the tshirt" I can understand why you gave up, it's a really difficult process to go through! Im trying my best to hold down a four day a week job, look after two children, a husband and a house....Im not sure where all this time for fighting against polotics is suppose to come in! I've had a few people say to me that the process will probably be more tricky as she is displaying high functioning and she's well.....a she The next major appointment that I have coming up is with a clinical psychologist (let's hope they don't think Im ###### lol). I spoke to eden's speech therapist last night at her appointment about the reception that I got and she advised me to complain, which I am definatly going to do...just hope it doesn't cause more hassle!

Thankyou everyone for your replies I have spoken to my pediatrition about the interview and she said she was concerned about the way that it has been carried out and that she was also appauled that she could make such a snap decision about eden when she had only spend two hours with her and less than an hour with me! She encouraged me to continue with the various appointments for eden we are currently awaiting an appointment for the clinical psychology and have three other speech therapy appointments to attend as she told me she is putting her part of the report together for the peditrition. Sorry to generalise about religious schools but I have spoke to the school nurse who states there have been quite a few problems with this school not engaging, the peditrition however has told me to keep her there for now untill a place at another local school becomes avalible. Eden has also decided that she's not religious as she doesn't understand how god could have possibly made so many things in such a short amount of time (I dont think this has gone down too well!) but she does believe in santa- of course he can make all the toys in the world he has helpers As for the sensory needs, these are the greatest problems that we have with her, she will wear the same cardigan for school for months then all of a sudden it's scratchy. She's very sensitive to noise although will happily watch the tv with it on full blast as she tells me she can't hear it She has a phobia of hand dryers and flushing the toilet, she hates baths and doesn't seem to understand the importance of having her hair/teeth brushed. When you do wash her or whatever she grits her teeth as though you are really hurting her

Hello everyone Im new bare with me Right I have a question, Im not sure how much detail you need so please feel free to ask me anything (if it helps Im not fussed). My daughter is in a Catholic school (not sure that this makes a difference but some people seem to think it does), approx 18months ago she had a temporary school teacher in all of year one. The teacher at the time called me in to ask me about my daughter as she felt that something seemed a little unusual about her..... On a lenghty discussion with her I talked about how eden had always been extremly sensitive to situations and that she could behave different almost "quirky" she asked me if I had ever considered her behaviour as being more than "odd" compared to other kids. I told her I had had a tough time with her but that I'd learnt to adapt to her behaviours. This teacher then asked me if I minded her getting the school nurse to have a look at her just to rule out any sight,hearing difficulties etc... no not at all I said. The school nurse then rang me at home and told me physically there was nothing amiss with Eden but that she thought there might be something a little more going on we talked through her behaviour at home and she told me she would refer Eden to the local peditrition (spell check)... Ok so the peditrition looked at her, I was expecting her to discharge her from services on first look....nope she said she had the mental age of a 3year old and that she seemed to be displaying some unusual behaviours (we where only there an hour). SO I asked the big question which I guess I had suspected for some time....could she prehaps have a little autism in her jeans as her brother who was biologically her fathers son was......yes quite possibly. First meeting with the senco of the school told me that all this was unessacery and we "can all be a little autistic" and that she felt that eden would grow out of all this. So anyway back to the matter at hand....(bear in mind months has past through these various visits) The educational psychologist came this week to see eden I was informed to attend school for 3.15 which I was expecting to meet the ed psy, I got called into the room one side of me was the ed psy the other side the senco and in front of me the class teacher. The ed psy asked me what I ultimatly wanted for me and Eden and I told her for eden to get on better at school and for us to bond better. Must have been a red flag.... I was asked what eden's birth was like I explained that it was an eventful birth involving a short stay in the recovery wing of the hospital due to blood loss, then I was asked if I had breast fed...nops I couldn't as I couldn't move after having her...... did I want to, well yes but I couldn't. So then the biggy from this was that it must have been awfully traumatic for me (well yes but I didnt really know what to expect as it was my first child and didnt really have time to think of it).....then she went on for the next 20minutes telling me that eden's "odd" behaviours especially the lack of physical contact was down to me not bonding with her at the start of her life. Then I asked her to explain why then that she wouldn't have "physical" contact with anyone which she replied that she had seen evidence of her having this contact with another child in the class. She told me that eden allowed another child to put her arm around her (to which I was even shocked and questioned myself). This woman also told me that I couldn't possibly be talking to the peditrition on the phone at home as they don't do that (they do) then I was asked where the idea of the autism came from I told her it had been said initially by me but professionals have also put it down on paper (which she told me they can't have done as she's not diagnosed), which I explained they had but it wasn't an official label it was "suspected". This ed psy told me to go home spend time with my daughter forget about autism stop attending the local support group and to scrap all eden's charts (she likes to know whats going on when/reward charts etc). My question: Has anyone come across this kind of behaviour themselves? Are Catholic schools know for there closed behaviour? This school has a bad history for keeping the doors closed to professionals and eden now has a new teacher who has been there years, could they be trying to shut this down as a problem (bearing it in mind a temp teacher reported it to start with) this has been sugested to me. Would you complain about the attitude of the ed psy? How much weight does the ed phy have in eden's future care? SORRY VERY LONG WINDED PROMISE MY FUTURE POSTS WILL BE SMALLER

Thankyou Kathyn I think Im going to pop over to the education board

Just thought I'd pop in and say hello... Im a new forum user. I come from yorkshire and have two children a little girl called eden-rose aged 6years and evan aged 7mths. I'm currently struggling with the system with my daughter who is suspected as being either high functioning autistic or learning disabilitieswith autistic traits. I attend a support group when I can but I also work full time so find it all a struggle to fit in, however I was told to come here by a friend from this group to discuss difficulties that Im currently experiencing with the system and some general support I guess Sorry I usually have more to say but it's abit of a one way convo just now