Juno20

I wouldn't have thought so. It shouldn't affect your driving abilty as already mentioned. Ps good luck, I wasn't a natural driver and really struggled with learning, but I love it now :-)

I have recently started a part time job at a pub, due to the fact that my business has been slow to kick off. I have found this really stressfull as I am waitressing and having to approach and talk to lots of people. At first I thought it was just that it was new to me and I hadn't learned what things to say but when I look at how the other staff interact with the customers it makes me feel so useless and freakish. They can just chat and laugh and start conversations with people and seem to manage to actually find out stuff about the customers they are dealing with, where as I literally have a set of rehearsed phrases or lines that I will give when asking for orders and taking stuff away etc. If people complain about anything it really upsets me as I feel like its personal, even though I know it can't be. We are supposed to get customers to fill out questionnaires on how we did but I have so far not managed this as I just can't connect with my customers and therefore they have no desire to report back on what I was like. My managers keep telling me I have had no questionnaires and must try harder but I am just too shy to ask people to do it, especially when I know that I will have made absolutely no impression on them. I still don't have a diagnosis as my GP never referred me, even though he said he would, but I am too scared to go back and ask again. But going back to working for someone again has really made me realise how ###### I am at normal social interaction which makes me feel so abnormal and I'm certain it's not just that I'm a shy person. I also have problems with the background noise of the pub and can't hear people's voices over it, and find that because I have worked out my own routine on how to do all my tables it really muddles me and makes me quite angry if someone interrupts me or asks me to do something else. I have taken to drinking before I go in because it makes me feel a little less nervous and awkward when I'm there but obviously this is stupid and I should be able to manage just fine! I run my own business as a dog groomer, as I am a bit of a dog expert and find it extremely easy to talk to my customers and advise them about their pets, and I had honestly all but forgotten how painfully shy I am when it Comes to meeting new people when I have nothing in common with them. Do you think I should go back to the GP again or will having a diagnosis make no difference to me?

I have recently started a part time job at a pub, due to the fact that my business has been slow to kick off. I have found this really stressfull as I am waitressing and having to approach and talk to lots of people. At first I thought it was just that it was new to me and I hadn't learned what things to say but when I look at how the other staff interact with the customers it makes me feel so useless and freakish. They can just chat and laugh and start conversations with people and seem to manage to actually find out stuff about the customers they are dealing with, where as I literally have a set of rehearsed phrases or lines that I will give when asking for order and taking stuff away etc. Our people complain about anything it really upsets me as I feel like its personal, even though I know it can't be. We are supposed to get customers to fill out questionnaires on how we did but I have so far not managed this as I just can't connect with my customers and therefore they have no desire to report back on what I was like. My managers keep telling me I have had no questionnaires and must try harder but I am just too shy to ask people to do it, especially when I know that I will have made absolutely no impression on them. I still don't have a diagnosis as my GP never referred me, even though he said he would, but I am too scared to go back and ask again. But going back to working for someone again has really made me realise how ###### I am at normal social interaction. I run my own business as a dog groomer, as I am a bit of a s

This is very similar to my experience with the GP. He practically said the same thing, how will having a "label" help you!!! I have real problems with direct or personal questions like this and got all embarassed, I was told he would get me a referal but that was alomot a year ago and I've hered nothing. I'm too scared to go back or try again :-(

I went to the doctors at the begining of dec and he told me he would refer me to be assesed for AS. He said it would not be until January which I said was ok. Well now it is almost April and i have still not had any contact from them about a referal and i am starting to get a bit worried that they may have lied to me. My Boyfriend is anygry because he thinks i have just not bothered to get an appointment and he thinks i should call the doctors to see whats happening. I'm not happy about calling or going in again as i hate calling people and it was awfull the first time i went in. What do you think is the best thing to do?

I know what you mean Mumble, sorry is a strange word. When used in the context of someone dying or you having a bad time it just means they are sad for you and wish it wasn't the case. I find it really hard to appologise unless i really mean it. I was walking down the road a few weeks ago and some people who were coming the other way bumped into the bag i was holding and i didnt say anything, partly because i didnt expect it. My boyfriend then appologised which i found odd as he handn't bumped anyone, and then he told me off for not saying sorry. I was really cross as I hadnt meant to do it and if anthing they bumped into me. It caused a big row as he thought i was being rude when i really didnt mean to come accross as rude, just didnt have time to even consider saying sorry.

I am not a parent, but I have struggled my entire life with making friends and also spent most of my teenage years at home with my parents rather than with frineds for similar reasons to your son. My interest is animals and i find it really difficult to talk about anything else. I tend to start talking about animals or will steer the conversation that way and then its difficult to shut me up. It has only been in the last year or so (i'm now 28) that i have learned to keep the animals to a minimum and i will still not notice when i'm borning someone unless they make it very obvious and then i'm normally a bit offended. The only reason its taken me so long to realise is that most people arent direct enough to tell me that i'm not very interesting or i'm going on a bit and as i am rubbish at noticing that someones not interested i just keep elaborating. Luckily my boyfriend i'm with now just tells me when he's had enough and asks me to change the subject. He was the first person ever to be rude enough to tell me that i dont ever talk about anything else and it really made me realise that i have to try harder to be brief when talking about animals and that not everyone is as interested as me. When i mentioed to other family members what he'd said they all said "oh yea you're awfull, you just never shut up" It made me more aware of the problem and although i still go on a bit i do look for cues that i need to stop and try really hard not to talk about animals unless someone actually asks me something about them. I guess what im saying is that the best thing for me was for someone to bluntly point out that I stick to the same subject too much, and sometimes tell me when i'm doing it. I know its rude and you probably dont want to be rude to your son, but i wish my mum had just told me years ago. I do find it really hard not to talk about my favourate subject, but i'd rather try hard and have a normal social life.

I have a labrador (yellow) and am also training to be a dog behaviourist. I belive that dogs are amazingly beneficial to all people they come into contact with. The are proven to increase leavels of seratonin in the body and have an amazing calming effect providing they themselves are calm and relaxed. Labradors can be very good calm family pets if obtained from the right breeder and brought up in a calm consistent maner, I would say of all the breeds they are the most willing to please and easy to train dogs which is why they are so often used as assitance dogs. Don't be fooled though, they are also known to be difficult as puppies, and are can be very distructive and boistrous until they reach maturity at around 2 years of age. There are many other totally suitable dogs to live in the family home and the main thing is to do your research. Too many people buy the wrong type of dog and dont realise how much time and effort goes into training them to be a nice family pet. As it happens Greyhounds are one of the very best house dogs and need very little excersize (surprizingly) and are more than happy to laze about all day on a comfy bed and be fussed and stroked. They normally have excellent temperaments and really do make far better pets than many of the more popular breeds. If i were looking for an easy calm and healthy breed of dog then a greyhound would almost definaltly be top my list.

Hi Alexis, I can see how upsetting this situation must have been for you and it seems to be that your instructor has not been as profesional as he could have been, however as a self employed person your instructor has the right to pick and choose his customers, just like a builder can pick and choose which jobs he decides to take on. Sadly these choices have nothing to do with who deserves the work the most its all about making money. As a driving instructor I do occasionally stop teaching certain people for varios reasons. Last summer I was extremely busy and couldn't fit everyone in and so had to let one or two pupils go. I chose which ones to let go based on which people had the most regular lessons as this made good business sence as they were least likely to cancel lessons that could have been taken up by other people. This is not to say that they were unreliable but simply less consistent with having regular weekly times. I also let people go who were unrelaiable if they had cancelled at short notice. I am not saying that you were unrelaiable at all but if your instructor needed to cut back on pupils for personal reasons he will only think of himself in chooseing these pupils as he is running a business. He will need to consider what is the most sensible way to go, with regard to future profits and therefore will choose to keep pupils that have lots of regular lessons and not ones who may have a week off here and there because of health problems. He is perfectly within his rights to do this if he wishes and he doesn't have to give a reason why. This may seem very harsh and i'm not saying that it is right but unfortunately it is the way most self employed people think as they cannot afford to be not working, especially if they only work part time. You will be happy to know however that not all instructors are like this and if you can find someone who is an indipendant rather than with a big company like BSM they are far more likely to value you as a customer and should be more profesional as they want to keep you happy so that you will stay with them and hopefully recommend them to others. My experience of instructors who work for big companies is that they don't try as hard and often can't find there own work so rely on the company finding them customers, I get quite a few learners that have had bad experiences with these big companies. If you would like some help finding a suitable instructor in your area who is qualified in teaching people with disabilities then send me a PM and i'll get you some numbers to call, or if you prefer i can get them to call you. Don't be put off by this one bad experence.

Hi ARD, I am a driving instructor and am also qualified in teaching people with disabilities. I work part time at a centre that teaches and asseses people who are or have become disabled through illness or injury. The centre i work for is part of a group of centres nationwide run by a charity that help to keep people on the road safely. Part of what we do is assess people on behalf of the DVLA to asertain weather or not they are safe to continue driving. Our aim is not to get people off the road but to help people overcome there problems so that hopefully they can continuento drive safely. The assessments are extremely thorough going through physical and cognitive tests, and finally an on road assesment. I would suggest that if you are at all concerned about you fitness to drive you should refer yourself to one of these centres to be assessed by a profesional. It is highly unlikely that they would find you unfit to drive however they may be able to find out exactly where your weakneses lie and help you to overcome or work on these isssues thus making you a safer drivier. If you would like any more info on the charity just PM me.

Hi smiley, I have been teaching a boy with dispraxia and he's been getting on ok in an Automatic. I do 2 days a week in a centre that specialises in teaching people with disabilities. We get a vast range of pupils from people with ASD's, ceribal palsy and strokes to brain injuries and MS. It can be a real challenge but most people have the cabability to drive, its just finding way around the persons weakneses. One thing many AS learners struggle with is other people breaking the rules, as aspies tend to stick to rules religiously they can often find it messes them up if someone else does something unexpected and they have to make a quick adjustment. Its not always the case but it can be a problem. Also getting angry with other drivers breaking rules can come into it. I know the only accidents in my driving life have been down to others not doing the right thing and i've just not made any adjustment whatsoever as at the time i believed so strongly i was doing the right thing and they weren't. In hindsight i've looked back and thought "i knew they were going to do that and i could have stopped it happening so why the hell din't i?" Its probably taken me 10 years to realise that though. ha ha

Hi Willow, I love your blogs. How are the driving lessons going? I am a driving instructor, I am not diadnosed with AS but have been refered by my GP and am hoping to get my apointment soon. Sarah

I love your comparison to people with cold saying they have flu, my BF had a terrible cold over christmas and kept insisting he had flu. Man flu... ha ha. I do agree that someone could for various reasons get a DX if they just told the assesor the right things and acted the right way, but i never considered that someone might want to be labeled with this disability if they didn't actually have it. I suppose like you say different things motivate people to do strange things sometimes subconsiously. I must say your post has made me question my BF's motives for wanting me to get an assessment as i had made the decision not go for a DX after i was refered but he was quite insistant that i should go.

I HATED wobbly teeth, they drove me crazy. My mum pulled all mine out with a cotton thread and a slamming door. If they don't hurt then i don't think theres any harm in wobbling them to help them on there way, the sooner they're out the better. I still can't bear stuff happening to my teeth as it happens, and just the thought of a wobbly tooth makes me cringe. I dread the day i have to have a filling

I must confess that it does cross my ming sometimes that maybe i just have a lot of coincidental similarities to someone with AS and maybe I just have a slighly wierd personality and just don't fit in or have human friends. My Boyfriend is quite convinced i do have AS where as my sister just feels its just my personality. How does the person doing the diagnosing tell the difference between someone with AS and someone who has many autistic traits and few neurotypical traits?