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highlandcow

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About highlandcow

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    Norfolk Broads
  1. I have never been in a relationship either. I would love to have had a boyfriend when I was younger and always thought it would be so good if you could just skip the bit of getting to know the person and go to the stage where you knew them really well and felt relaxed in their company. I always found the physical aspects of the person was what attracted me. I read that was quite a common Aspie thing. I was also attracted to men who seemed very 'in control' and able. It makes sense as people look for someone who will be like the other piece of the jigsaw. Quiet women often are attracted to quiet socially able men and outgoing women to quieter men. Possibly if I had been an outgoing personality, I would have been more attracted to quieter men and that could have worked. I find it natural to be confident when I am on my own, but not when I am having to support another person. The fact that I was never in a relationship affected my self esteem, as work colleagues treat you differently. Although it's easy to say 'not to let other people's opinions bother you', other people's opinions do matter in the real world. I figure I wouldn't have been bullied in my work nearly as much if I had been in a relationship. I was mainly bullied by men and if they thought I had a boyfriend living with me, I doubt they would have treated me that way. The fact I was not in a relationship affected my self esteem for years, but strange - it no longer does. I really enjoy living on my own. A lot of girls I know who were in relationships no longer are and I've got to know other women who never got married or lived with anyone. NT women as well as Aspies. I think there are many more girls who choose this way of life nowadays and don't give a toss if others talk about them. The more people who live on their own and don't want to be in relationships, the better I think as then it becomes more accepted.
  2. Congratulations it's Aspergers was my favourite. Quite similar to my life, so maybe that is why I enjoyed it.
  3. Aeolienne, I never knew there were all these books out there on Aspergers and women. I'd really like to read some of them and must look out for them. What a great idea to write notes on each. Would be good for me to do that as I forget what I've read by the time I reach the end of the book! Must print out your post.
  4. I had a 'best friend' when I started school. About a year after I knew her, she became someone else's 'best friend'. I remember what it was like having a 'best friend'. Have never had a friend who I would really describe like this since. Have had friends, quite a number, but not friends where I felt I could just be myself. Haven't really made a good friend in the Aspie World.
  5. I agree with Special Talent too. Far too expensive for me especially by the time you pay for travelling expenses on top of it all.
  6. I've just recently joined this forum and thought I'd say hello. I wonder if anyone here knows of any Asperger Women's Forum groups on the go especially in the UK? Thanks in anticipation.
  7. The thing is although jobs are advertised as looking for someone with excellent communication skills etc, half of the people who are recruited to these positions don't have particularly great skills in those areas. They are just good at convincing the interviewers that they have them. It annoys me too that so many jobs put this in their adverts. For many jobs it is really important to have these skills but not for all of them who ask for it. Years ago when it was just as important to have good communication skills it wasn't a buzz term that appeared in every job ad.
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