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oakers

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Everything posted by oakers

  1. How about people be allowed to express themselves and explain how it feels from their perspective, instead of trying to tell them what to do? You may not like the fact that people are discussing something, but you don't have to read or reply to it. The place will only be able to move forward once people have started to get this out of their systems.
  2. I'm sorry, I've read and re-read but I don't understand.
  3. So because people hold a different opinion and might express that they are 'trolls'?
  4. I'd definitely be interested to see who these new people who are trolling then... I've not seen people newer than me doing so? How does someone moderate in a member role? I'm confused?
  5. May I ask who you are referring to? I assume I might be lumped into that, given that I'm new and I hold opinions that perhaps don't represent yours? Another question, how can someone be a great moderator if they were only in the role for a few days!? He had the potential to be a great moderator but he didn't stick around long enough for that to be a possibility.
  6. Apparently I grind my teeth in my sleep. I guess the proof was when I had to go to the dentist as I'd somehow chipped my front tooth, had no idea why. She got me to line my teeth up and told me it was definitely because I grind them. I've never found any other problems with my teeth apart from that though so I've been very lucky it seems. Given my phobia of the dentist I'd say it's a VERY lucky thing! I would have thought that if people are getting through the guards there'd be more offered... how bizarre. Robert - Maybe it's just not a very relaxed sleep?
  7. Lyndalou, I agree, this place can feel very cliquey at times. I see posts / threads, including mine, pretty much being ignored at times because they're not from those in a select group. I would have thought that if you want to hold private conversations you'd do it in private, rather than conduct your business on a forum. I came here because I'd pretty much exhausted my options in regards to finding anything particularly new online about a diagnosis of AS that literally came out of the blue for me. I thought that being on a forum with people going through the same things would be more helpful than listening to people who think they know. I have bought a couple of books but sadly, haven't brought myself to pick them up yet as I'm having trouble motivating myself to read a proper book given things I'm dealing with right now. I thought that people would be more accepting of us new people who come here to find a safe place to express themselves and learn more about their diagnosis, and other people who share that very same, or similar, diagnosis with them. We're on the outs enough as it is, let's not make the forum the same as 'real life'.
  8. oakers

    Self Harming

    I really hope that this new medication will help JeanneA. One question though... is talking about the propensity for self harm for someone other than yourself not the same as talking about self harm in general? I was under the impression we weren't allowed to talk about self harm or suicidal intent.
  9. I find it interesting that people are saying 'driven away'. Granted, I think some were, but one was a moderator who stated they left because the people they called friends, and those they looked up, to were leaving. Just a few short days ago the same person said that they were excited to be a moderator so that they could carry on helping people etc etc. So general question here... which is it? Wanting to help people and take on the role of moderator, or jumping ship because something happens that you don't like? I don't get it... Sorry. I have AS, yes. I am outspoken at times, yes. I stick up for people that deserve it, yes. I'm all of those things and more, some of which you will like, some of which you might not, but all that said I'm truly saddened to see what has happened on here the past few days because, as previously mentioned, I feel that this should be a haven for people like us, who have little to no support elsewhere. Right now this doesn't feel much like a haven... :/
  10. Thanks Sa... no, not really... did get some stuff published in print. Mostly it was stuff I did for my own website, or other sites really.
  11. I was put on a really high dose of steroids the day after my symptoms started and the GP said we were lucky to catch it so quick. Mum thought I'd had a stroke, and as a young kid, that must have been quite scary for her to see. I think all up it was about 4 months before I got back to school, but it hadn't completely resolved by then. Interesting that you know someone who got it through a draft from a window as I was warned that I could end up getting it again via that, although was told that if I did get it again it would be unlikely to resolve itself again. I've been told that if I get super tired you can still tell I've had it. It really is painful trying to floss with teeth like that isn't it!! No one else believes me!
  12. That's really interesting how you've identified that your clothing can change your mood. I'm happy just to have comfortable clothes on. I don't like scratchy fabric, or wools etc. I prefer things to be cool, and can't wear long sleeve tops. Any cardigans I have are either 3/4 sleeve or short sleeve. I've started being able to wear zip up hoodies more comfortably recently and I've come to realise I didn't like those with tight arms on them. I prefer those with a bit of a gap between your arm and the material. I'm all for comfortable, so it's trousers and a nice top at work and jeans / combats and a nice top when I'm not in work. I don't wear heels as I'm useless at walking in them and my feet are insanely painful anyway most of the time. I'm boring... that's the word I'm looking for!
  13. That lion cub video was sooo sweet Share: This is what I used to do as a hobby... http://www.oakers.co.uk/ ... take photos of sweaty metal dudes Sometimes it makes me sad to think I don't do it anymore (after I think 10 or 11 years, maybe longer)... but looking back at the photos every now and again makes me smile and memories flood back.
  14. Hmm you make a very good point Sa... I believe there are guardian angels out there... some in our family believe my brother had one for a time when he was younger. He could see her as if she was stood there next to him like you or I might be... and he'd talk to her, thinking that we could all see and hear her. He'd also say that her family would visit her, and he could see them all and tell you all their names etc and what they were doing. Then, one day, when he'd been well for a while he turned around and told my mum that she'd gone. When asked why he said that she was going to look after someone else who needed her more. I think he was 5ish then. There's been some other stuff that makes me believe even more so nowadays, but nothing I've experienced in my own right, as yet. So yes, I believe some of it may be guidance or 'being looked after' by another power but I also believe some of it to be will.
  15. oakers

    Hello

    Hello and welcome to the forum. Sorry to hear about your son being so poorly, that must be so difficult for you all. How do you feel now that you have your diagnosis? Do you think it will make things easier for you, knowing that this is what you have? It's interesting that you say you think your son has aspergers as well. Do you think a diagnosis would help him? I have a second cousin who has just been diagnosed and I know that it was important for him to get the diagnosis as he was having trouble in school (7 next birthday), but that's in Australia. Here's hoping you'll find lots of info that's useful to you on here
  16. To a point I'd agree with this, but there is some stuff that NO ONE should have to go through, and you wouldn't classify it as a learning experience... some things are just plain bad. And those that go through those experiences who end up depressed have good reason to be. Those who are strong willed make it through these things a lot better than those that are less strong, or haven't developed as strong coping mechanisms. I believe it is possible to learn how to deal with things better, but like I said, there are some things no one should have to go through.
  17. Haven't been able to read everything here or over at the site linked, but shall bookmark as this looks like a very interesting discussion A bit too tired to take it all in properly at the moment though.
  18. Brother Firetribe, Who Will You Run To Now
  19. This is the only one. I've run forums before, but never really belonged to that many.
  20. I normally put my ipod on shuffle in the car, or shuffle itunes when I'm at home. Today, the last thing I listened to was Who Will You Run to Now by Brother Firetribe. (I have no idea how to post links to videos etc).
  21. I'm petrified of the dentist after getting bell's palsy after I'd had them cleaned once when I was younger. I'd always been very regimented with my teeth cleaning and had to do so at least twice a day. I have carried on like that, and insist on brushing them twice a day, although I don't floss as my teeth are too close together and I can't get floss between them without cutting myself! Up to now I've still got a baby tooth and haven't had any fillings etc. Only two teeth to be extracted was one baby tooth that broke in half when I was in my 20s and then an impacted wisdom tooth. I NEVER want to have to go through surgery for the latter again, the recovery was horrific.
  22. At work I am a complete neat freak and everything has to be in order, to the point that I've had people say I mustn't be busy as I have hardly anything on my desk. That, in turn irritates me, as I can't see why having a clean desk would make you look any less busy than someone with papers strewn all over it :/ At home I'm a little less strict with things.
  23. I'm starting to realise I feel the same. I'm fed up of being the one that usualy has to make the effort too. I'm much better, for the most part, just doing my own thing, when I want to do it, bar a couple of exceptions.
  24. Ahhh... I don't know what to suggest then... I hope he settles back down again soon.
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