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badonkadonk

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About badonkadonk

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    Ben Nevis
  • Birthday 12/28/1982

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  1. Hello all Yep, everything is hunky dory. It's a gloriously sunny day in London Town! B x
  2. Hallo It's been quite a long time since I was last around. I thought I might give it a go again. How is everyone doing? B x
  3. Hey everyone! I know I haven't posted in ages but I'm being kept as a slave by my boss I wish I could be more like Neil and skive off at work to get my picture taken by strange women! What am I on about you might ask? Would you employ this man? Neil recently did a sit down chat thing with the Department of Work and Pensions and as a bonus they made him pose for photos and we all know how much Neil likes having his photo taken! Neil is the handsome bloke with dark hair They have predictably changed how Neil describes AS and what not and have insisted on referring to it as something he has, blah blah blah. It's fairly easy to tell what Neil has actually said and what they have re-worded into the usual rubbish. But on a whole it's a good interview I think and a positive representation of AS in the workplace! Hope you all have a good weekend, Emily.
  4. Thanks for all the congratulations and well wishes Wish I could have replied to this thread a bit sooner but I've been non-stop at work. It also explains why I've gone from sometimes around on the board to virtually disappeared, but I wouldn't change things, I finally have a full-time job up here and it's great. I have something else that's great as well and that is my lovely hubby-to-be God that seems so strange to write that, I can't think of Neil as my husband just yet!!! Sorry to disappoint some of you but we've decided on a long engagement, on the basis that we feel (and have felt pretty much from the get go) that we are more to each other than just boyfriend and girlfriend, but we also feel that it's not right to get married any time soon. We've only been together seven months still and while it feels absolutely right to get engaged and make that extra commitment, I wouldn't go shopping for hats for another couple of years if I were you Besides which my big bro only got married at the end of March this year, my dad would kill me if he had to pay money towards another wedding Still we're back off down to Birminghamshire (as Neil insists on calling it) this weekend to visit the fantastic Jewellery Quarter to go shopping for a ring Oooooh I'm so excited! Though I'm dragging my mum with us (dragging, yeah right) so that we two Aspies don't get suckered in and ripped off, given our somewhat gullible nature It's been a pretty interesting year this year. It started out pretty pants what with my previous relationship heading slowly downwards, me dreading doing my reading at my brother's wedding and being fed up about my health and the doctor's not being bothered about me. But 11 months later and I'm totally, utterly, head over in heels in love with the most amazing man I've ever ever met (and never ever expected to meet). I'm living in Herrrrrgate, away from my folks, established in a proper routine for the first time in my entire life. I've sorted out (kinda) my health and while it's not 100% at least the tablets I'm on are allowing me to work full-time and have a life for once. I have a full-time job now and it's only just a rubbish wage as well (thought I would be lucky if someone offered to pay me at all!!!), not bad going for someone who hadn't worked since Feb 06 due to being poorly. And to top it all off the man I love wants to marry me Don't get me wrong, I never considered myself one of the hard done by people in the world. I've have a tendency to have bad luck but it's not all been bad. But for the first time in an awfully long time it seems like the cloud is finally beginning to lift, things are working for me for once and it feels overwhelmingly good. I'm not being a show off, rather I just want to make it clear that no matter what your situation is things can change, things can and will happen and eventually it will get better. I've been fighting for things to get better since I was about 13 so sometimes it might take a while, but eventually it will happen Right off to get changed, we're going out for a meal to celebrate Emily xxx
  5. Mumble, are you thinking of Rich Hall as the dark haired guy? He's American and his humour is really, really dry to the point where it's hard to know whether he's being serious or not. He never laughs at his own jokes and rarely cracks a smile at others. He seems miserable and really sarcastic to begin with but sometimes he is really, really funny. He's been on QI, HIGNFY and 8 out of 10 Cats My dinner guests......yeah right! An Aspie at a dinner party! You're having a f***** laugh!! If the thought of a dinner party didn't make me want to lever my eyes out with a fork, I would probably invite the following people..... 1. Neil. Because he's great. 2. Charlie Brooker. (Just because he reassures me that someone else in the world sees things like I do) 3. Spongebob Squarepants (with Gary, of course) (plus he makes a mean Krabby Patty) 4. Philip Larkin (To b*tch about the world with) 5. Jackie Chan (Though I would refuse to play him at Twister) 6. Fred Astaire (My ideal Grandad) 7. Jack Black (My ideal older brother) 8. Ross Noble (to provide a bizarre but hysterical commentary on the evening) 9. Hiro Nakimura (to stop time if I spill my drink/drop my food down my posh frock like I always do) 10. My mum's mum (she died before I was born) Oh and Wills and Shuff (with their own mini guinea-friendly dining table of course, with green beans for each course) Actually if I had my mum's mum I would have to have my mum's dad as well because he died when I was little and then of course my whole family would have to come because I wouldn't want them to miss out......me thinks I need a bigger imaginary table Emily xxx Oh and the bouncers will have strict instructions not to let in any of the following people: Anthony Worrall Thompson, Andrew Lincoln (brilliant in Teachers, but if I hear him doing the voice over for one more flippin advert!!!), Kate Thornton (and/or Tess Daly), any of the BBC breakfast news team, Max Clifford, Louis Walsh, Denise Van Outen, Jim Davidson, Chrissy Hynde, Gervais, Lawrence Dallagio, the ITV football/Rugby commentary team, Kate Moss and Avril Lavigne to name a few!!
  6. It's my fault, I've finally managed to convince someone to actually give me a job (I started my second week today, yep, still haven't been fired!) and unfortunately the job involves working every alternate Saturday. Having started last week working the Saturday, 1st December falls on a Saturday 'on' week. It's normal hours (well, we do finish half hour earlier on a Saturday) so I'd work 8.00am-3.30pm We'll have to meet up again after Christmas, we could have an anniversary meet-up (plus me and Neil would have just been together a year then so you lot would have an excuse to get drunk!) Anyway stopping rambling for once, Emily xxx
  7. Thanks for all the well wishes you lot! <'> It's really lovely to know that you're happy for us. We were meant to be doing the typical thing that a lot of couples do to celebrate their anniversary....go out for a meal....but we are both a bit under the weather with colds at the minute so we decided we couldn't be bothered with the stress of eating out and instead celebrated Aspie style! Eating Dominos pizza, wearing comfy trackie bottoms (ooo the glamour), watching James Bond on the projector. That's my kind of celebration! Emily xxx
  8. Good afternoon all Just wanted to take this opportunity to give a little public shout-out to my luverly boyfriend. It seems somewhat appropriate to do this on here given that this is where we first met (in a virtual sense anyway) and saying it in front of you guys will show him that I really, really mean it (I hope!) So without further ado.... HAPPY SIX MONTH ANNIVERSARY NEIL! I love you. Very, very much, you make me super duper happy I can't believe how much my life has changed since I met you, I was doing ok before, but now for the first time I feel like I'm actually living my life. The best thing about being with you is that not only are you stupidly handsome, brilliantly funny and a frickin genius but you are also my best friend, my best Aspie friend. The fact that we are both Aspies is, for me, one of the extra special bonuses of our relationship. You understand me, instantly, I love the fact that you hate going out socialising as well, that you too like eating the same food, on the same nights, week in week out. I love the fact that we do the housework on almost the same day each week, and we do it in the same order everytime! I love that you shout at the news in the morning just as much as I do and get frustrated with the idiots in the world! I love how, despite us both disliking hugs off other people and hating eye contact, we are always hugging and looking at each other. And I love how we can't lie to each other, and how once I've gotten past my layers of low self-esteem and lack of confidence I know I can almost believe you when you tell me you love me and that I'm a nice person. Only almost, I'm still working on it Anyway, better stop before I make everyone else vomit! Thanks to everyone on the forum for helping this place to exist, if I hadn't of found this forum and felt welcome enough to start rambling on at people (and on, and on) I would have never have shouted at Neil to stop moaning or started to take the mickey out of him for being a girly Northerner and thus plant the beginnings for what has happened over the last six months Emily xxx
  9. Mumble I think you're going to regret asking for this Please be aware that my version has been composed by someone who is certified insane and not great at rhyming So the original (bar the first few lines that I never remember to sing) went a little something like this... Mama, just killed a man, Put a gun against his head, Pulled my trigger, now he's dead. Mama, life had just begun, But now I've gone and thrown it all away. Mama ooooo, Didn't mean to make you cry, If I'm not back again this time tomorrow, Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters. Too late, my time has come, Sends shivers down my spine, Body's aching all the time. Goodbye everybody- I've got to go, Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth. Mama ooooo (any way the wind blows), I don't want to die, I sometimes wish Id never been born at all..... I see a little silhouetteo of a man, Scaramouch, Scaramouch will you do the fandango? Thunderbolt and lightning- very very frightening me! Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Galileo Figaro magnifico. But I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me, He's just a poor boy from a poor family, Spare him his life from this monstrosity. Easy come easy go, will you let me go? Bismillah! No, we will not let you go (let him go) Bismillah! We will not let you go (let him go) Bismillah! we will not let you go (let him go) Will not let you go (let me go) Will not let you go (let me go) No, no, no, no, no, no, no! Mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go, Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me, for meeeeee.... So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye? So you think you can love me and leave me to die? Oh baby, cant do this to me baby, Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here. Nothing really matters, Anyone can see, Nothing really matters, nothing really matters to me. And my version goes (oh dear)..... Mama, just killed a ram, Put a gun against its head, Pulled my trigger now it's dead. Mama, it's life had just begun, But now I've gone and thrown it all away. Mama ooooooo, I just wanted Shepherd's Pie, But now I'm going to become Vegetarian, You carry on, carry on, my appetite's in tatters. Too late, it's nearly done, Lay the table, pour the wine, Pretend it's chicken, you'll be fine. Oh no, b*st*rd b*ll*x, I've got no Oxo! Go buy some before your father hits the roof! Mama ooooo (what if the shop's shut now?) I don't want to die, I wish that ram had never been born at all.... I see a little silhoutto of the ram, Holy Sh*t, holy Sh*t I'm having flashbacks oh, Lunch is not inviting ? it's very very frightening me! No Tesco! Oh No Tesco! No Tesco! No Tesco! No Tescos already closed. I'm just a poor boy I was just hungry, He's just a poor boy he wanted Shepherd's Pie for tea, Spare him his life from this monstrosity! Sorry dad, shop was shut, I've got no Oxo. Bismillah! No, we must have some Oxo (Some Oxo!) Bismillah! We must have some Oxo (Some Oxo!) Bismillah! We must have some Oxo (Some Oxo!) Must have some Oxo (Some Oxo!) Must have some Oxo (Some Oxo!) No, no, no, no, no, no, no Mama mia, mama mia, mama mia no Oxo! Our stupid son has ruined Shepherd's pie for me, for me for meeeee! So you think you come between me and my pie? Because there is no Oxo you'll leave me to die? Oh daddy, cant do this to me daddy, You've just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here... Nothing really matters, Anyone can see, Without my Shepherd's pie, nothing really matters to meeeeee! Yes well a masterpiece it ain't but I've amused myself on many occassions honing my tribute to Shepherd's Pie I think it's time I was leaving Emily xxx
  10. I lurrve music and have to listen to it really loud to be in my element I like all types of music, mainstream mainly but I listen to music from all kinds of decades and genres. If I had to pick one in particular it would probably be classic rock groups/music. None of that Rolling Stone/The Beatles type business, more like Free, Bad Company, Black Crowes, Incubus, Led Zeppelin, The Strokes...that kind of thing. But then I can go from listening to that to listening to dance music, cheesy pop, hip hop etc etc. As long as I like it I'll listen to it. Neil listens to a lot of film scores, soundtracks, TV themes that kind of thing. He also likes cheesy Euro pop, dance music and a bit of the ol'Sinatra but he definitely has a lot weirder taste in music than me. We can both listen to the same song on repeat for ages and ages and tend to go through cycles of listening to the same batch of songs (though this tends to be me more than Neil). Even though I've got like 1761 songs on Itunes I only really listen to the songs on my Current Faves playlist day to day which has a tiny 62 songs on it in comparison. I don't think I'm a bad dancer, it's something I used to do when I was younger though and I was pretty good at it too so I shouldn't be too rubbish at it. Neil on the other hand, it's not that he's a bad dancer he's just the funniest dancer I know His arms and legs seem to move of their own accord whereas his head just bobs up and down to the music. He can imaginary tap dance (Donald O'Connor stylee) like nobody else I know and I've been known to almost die of laughter when he does it. The only way I can describe it is to imagine that he's being operated by four different puppeteers when he dances (That or he's on drugs/having a fit) Music has a far greater effect on my emotions though than a lot of people I know. I get more affected by certain pieces of music than I do by hearing about people's current situations. Tell me someone has died and (unless it's an immediate member of my family) I'm fairly non-plussed. Play me Map of the Problematique by Muse and it really stirs up my emotions. I don't feel particularly sad or happy just really affected by it. I also have a thing about making up absurd lyrics to existing songs or coming up with little ditties about what is happening day to day, I have quite a talent for it actually though my brain seems to be permanently wired to childish humour and the need to reference people's backsides, toilet activities and other naughty adult things as much as possible. I think all my remixes would have to have parental advisory stickers on them I personally blame my dad, ever since I heard him change the lyrics to Bohemian Rhapsody from 'Spare him his life from this monstrosity' to 'Spare him his life from his burnt sausages' I just can't help myself. Over the years Bohemian Rhapsody has stayed with me to the point that now my version is all about Shepherd's Pie! It's really quite frightening that I'm actually allowed out by myself when you consider I changed the opening lyric to 'Mama, just killed a ram...' Anyway just really wanted to let you know that the strange dancing isn't for kids only which is great as because Neil's dancing makes me laugh so much, I've filmed some of it on my mobile and now whenever I'm feeling particularly evil I can threaten to put it on YouTube Hehehehehehehe! Emily xxx
  11. Hopefully it will get sorted out soon Emily xxx Jeez Louise I think that is the shortest post I've ever done!!
  12. badonkadonk

    I Knew It!

    Hehehehehe liked the link, ta very much like Tally The only thing I'm worrying about now is most people think I'm an idiot anyway so apart from bashing people to death with my Aspie brick am I also inadvertently killing others in other ways I think there is only one answer for this, I must not be allowed to work! TADA! Somehow I think Neil isn't going to fall for that one! Emily xxx
  13. Flora, I'm really sorry that's how you feel. I wish you would name names though, I know I'm weird, but like for example Baddad has a problem with what Neil put and he said so, so I know not to get worried about that (I think?) because he would have quoted me if I had said something that really offended (I hope?) or maybe I'll be dealt with later when he has more time I'm just worried now that you think I'm emotionally blackmailing people. I only think this because I'm someone else who is AS who is posting on this thread. I don't want you to think I'm having a go I'm not, I'm not upset and this post isn't as much about how I feel more my worries about how I might be making you feel....if that makes any sense whatsoever I might just be being paranoid or I might be the name you didn't want to name, and I'm not expecting you to post back who you are upset by, I just worry that I've done something wrong or have been misinterpreted and I can't put it right because I don't know for sure that I've done anything. Again I hope that makes sense. I really don't understand how it's gone from a discussion about sub folders to people getting really upset, I feel like I've missed a few posts here and there. What Neil said about the patting on the head wasn't very nice, I can't apologise for him or make him even, all I can try and say is he's not a bad bloke really (You see now I'm worrying about whether this is emotional blackmail or not me saying Neil isn't really a monster?) I wasn't upset with anyone either time I posted and when I gave my possible reasons for having a sub-folder I didn't mean it to come across as if I was attacking people, I said that in my first post. Ever get that feeling that when you first write something it makes sense, you hit post and then you see people's replies and wonder if your post has somehow been turned into another language and back again and the translation was wrong? This happens to me everytime I post Emily xxx Lisa just read your post and that's what I'm trying to say I just can't seem to say it! It's what I was trying to say initially, that I was frightened of what effect the sub-folder malarky might have while at the same time understanding that there might be things that adults on the spectrum want to say but feel a bit frightened to incase they cause world war 3....but as per usual I turned it into a big long ramble where all my meanings were lost and jumbled
  14. Flora, Neil never said that just because he's an Aspie he is impolite and he can't help it. He wasn't being impolite. He was saying that sometimes we say things direct and to the point, which is true, and that sometimes this can offend others who are used to people not being so straightforward. Neil knows full well how to be polite, I know how to be polite, in fact it's a bit ironic because Neil is one of the politest people you could ever meet. I understand that your opinion is that you and your son should never use your diagnosis as an excuse for being honest to the point of being hurtful and I guess in a way if I ever did unintentionally hurt someone's feelings by being honest I would apologise wholeheartedly and not say 'oh well I'm AS so there.' But, I do believe that one of my traits is that I can be, at times, too honest for other people to handle. I don't think there is anything bad with being honest in most situations. If someone had a terrible haircut I probably wouldn't say anything but if she asked me what I thought I might find it difficult to hide in my body language how I felt. People often say to me that they can read me 'like an open book' and despite my best efforts to lie it's something I find really difficult. The same goes for Neil, he apologised to Lya in case he upset her. It's not that I set out to be brutally honest to people, that isn't in my nature, but sometimes I give the honest answer rather than what people want to hear and it can upset people but it is always unintentional. There is a difference I think between meaning to and not meaning to and I believe that sometimes, because of my personality (which is Aspie shaped) I can be honest, to the point of being hurtful, but I don't mean to. I think this is what Neil was trying to say. He wasn't saying I'm Aspie, deal with it. He was saying 'sorry if I upset you, I sometimes stick my foot in it.' If you don't think this is an Aspie trait that's fair enough but I thought it was and I'm certain it has been discussed on this board many a times with people laughing at how blunt and straightforward their ASD kids can be. A good example of how I am honest (and thus sometimes hurtful without meaning to be) is the story that my mum tells everyone. That once when I was younger she was on a diet and I couldn't grasp what this meant. When my mum said 'I'm going on a diet' I literally thought she was going somewhere. I wanted to go there too, I wanted to be on a diet. For peace and to regain some sanity after days of badgering my mum told me that people started to diet if they needed to lose weight. Fair enough, I could grasp that concept. The next day we went to the supermarket and happened to be walking behind a woman who was of the larger build. I said to my mum 'mummy that lady needs to go on a diet doesn't she.' Well of course the woman whipped her head round and gave my mum and me a look that could kill and my poor old mum was mortified. It's not that I meant to hurt her feelings, just that I didn't make the link between her feelings and her needing to lose weight. While I'm a lot more worldly now (thanks to retrieving my foot out of my mouth on many, many more occasions) I still sometimes find that I am honest without realising that it could be hurtful. It's something I stress about a lot and the reason why most of my posts are peppered with me saying 'sorry if I offend anyone' etc. So I think you're right that if you are purposely being mean and hurtful through blunt honesty and passing it off as ok because you are Autistic then that's wrong. But that isn't what Neil was doing. Or I. I don't quite know which one of us you were on about it but either way. It's a bit unfair to levey that criticism at either of us because from other posts you would be able to see that we are both two people who strongly believe in making the best of a different situation, accepting the fact that we are different, accepting the fact that not everyone will be ok with this and getting out there, on with life, making of it what you will and not hiding behind our diagnosis or using it as an excuse for not doing anything. And I know you didn't say that your last comments were directed at me or Neil (or your first comments) but just to clarify my take on the situation I'm against having a separate section for adults on the spectrum. I made this very clear in my post. I personally only used the words segregation because others who had posted previous to me were using those words and I was responding to what they had said. I too don't understand why having a separate section would instantly mean one posts here and the other posts there, but my worry is that it would happen regardless. Similarly I also sympathised with Bid and Tally because, having thought through it all, I didn't know how to solve the problem of them wanting to say things but couldn't feel like they could. Moving away from that others have said (since I last posted) that this discussion had become an us vs them thread and that this was a bad thing. I kind of agree but wasn't it inevitable? I mean the very topic deals with ASD and Non-ASD plus you have people responding to the thread who are NT and those who aren't. Emily xxx
  15. Hullo You mentioned in another thread (in off topic I think) about when you first went back to uni after sending the email about disclosure and how the one person who you would actually call a friend was a bit off with you. This wonky board thing could be a way to solve both problems in one go. Or it could just be another of my rubbish ideas How about asking your friend, cos he's a bloke and all so he might own drills and measuring sticks and what not (to be completely sexist for a mo), if he could come and straighten up the board thing and explain how, after it has taken so long to get them to come do it in the first place you don't want to appear ungrateful (because it's brilliant that it has finally been done) and how you don't want it to take another 6 months to do and in that case could he come and sort it out as you don't own any drills and what not yourself (if you do, lie, or sell them and you won't have to lie ). You could then use this as a prime opportunity to have a chat about your email and his reactions. You could start talking to him while he's busy with the board and that way it's less formal and he might feel better talking to you while doing something, especially if he has any questions which he feels uncomfortable about asking. Like I said, probably a rubbish idea but it popped in my head so I thought I would share it. Hope you get it sorted soon, either way. That or learn to tilt your head to one side permanently so it looks straight (I realise that is unhelpful, I do deserve a punch!) Emily xxx
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