Aviemorticia

Hi, If you haven't already, you may wish to contact Autism Initiatives Northern Ireland who will have a lot of contacts to get information to autistic people and those involved with them: http://www.autisminitiatives.org/where-we-are/autism-initiatives-northern-ireland/ Local schools, libraries, doctors' surgeries, Citizens' Advice and other places where people go for help may be able to display information about your support group. Community notice boards in places such as shops, post offices, community centres, youth clubs and churches might be another possibility. Good luck, and well done for doing something so practical and committed to help other people :-)

Is the client relationship of the sort where there are rules against developing a personal relationship? If the line of work involved is anything which includes confidential information or any kind of care or support (financial, medical, education, pastoral etc) or the workplace has any rules against it for whatever reason, then this could become very complicated and distressing and have consequences which would be very hurtful and damaging to either or both of you, especially as she is in a relationship. Your instincts are very important and you are already uncomfortable. There is no harm in enjoying a friendly interaction with someone but everything you have shared suggests to me that you need to be very careful. It sounds as though it would not be a good thing to reveal too much to her about your vulnerabilities nor to let the personal relationship develop any further. When a developing friendship is healthy, it doesn't usually involve worrying about the person turning nasty if you have to set boundaries. Are you her client or is she your client?

Hi Liz, as your son has not been offered any interviews I was wondering whether you have heard of this scheme and if it may help you? https://www.gov.uk/looking-for-work-if-disabled/looking-for-a-job The "Two Ticks Scheme" guarantees an interview to disabled people who meet certain criteria under the Disability Discrimination Act. It may be worth looking into. The range of employers joining the scheme appears to be quite extensive. Good luck to your son and to you.

Hi Trekster, I haven't told my parents and do not intend to because they are very elderly and it would be a major upheaval for them to come to terms with it. They live 300 miles away and are the only family I have; I consider my friends, who do know, to be my extended family. I do get on well with my parents and we see one another three or four times a year. I hope that the process of coming to terms with your diagnosis is ongoing with your family and in time they come to understand it better. It is scary at first but the most important thing to remember (for both sides), as summed up by the very kind, switched on and friendly specialist who interviewed and diagnosed me, is that you are still you; it isn't something which has just happened and changed you, it has always been part of you in all its positive and negative aspects and having that diagnosis is the start of finding answers and hopefully some peace of mind. Good luck to you all. x

Oh no that's the last thing you needed, more stress! I hope whoever did that gets caught! However I am really glad you got a lot out of the needs assessment and support from a good friend. It is so much better to have someone actually there with you to go through the forms. I really admire you for thinking so positively after the setback with the vandalism. Here's to you xx

How did your DSA needs assessment go? I hope that you got someone with a good understanding of autism and a willingness to listen to how you are affected. Talking through your needs would be good practice for filling in the PIP form. I hope it has been a helpful experience which will have positive results for you :-)

Dear Lola, You must be feeling so stressed; these forms are never easy. The main piece of advice which is coming from many sources is that you need to answer according to what you go through on your worst day rather than a typical or better day. This in itself is really hard as it makes you focus on the negatives, but you have to in order to give yourself the best chance of a successful claim. If you haven't done so already, start with the basics; the questions about your personal details, doctor etc just to get you through the barrier of making a start and get you used to the feeling of completing the form. Then look at each question in turn; try not to stress yourself out even more by thinking too far ahead. It doesn't matter if you repeat yourself or if your answers don't seem to "flow"; they are looking for your difficulties in your own words and if possible, examples. Make sure you emphasise all of the effects your conditions have on you, including tiredness and taking longer to do things. Imagine yourself doing whatever the question is asking you about; think of the times you have done it recently or any times which stand out in your memory because it was particularly hard or went wrong in some way. Imagine yourself telling someone you trust about it; this will help you to find the words to express it on the form. Take breaks when you need to and then go back over what you have written to see if it makes you remember anything else. If you cannot get help in time, make sure you tell them this. You should allow yourself some kind of treat after filling in the form as it does leave you feeling low and drained; you deserve a reward for having tackled it, including having the courage and initiative to ask for help on here; well done. If you feel there is some aspect of your difficulties which you have not had the chance to cover on the form itself, write it on a separate sheet but make sure you put your name and National Insurance number on any extra sheets in case they become separated from the rest of your form in the office. I have a thread called Coping Strategies Guides in the Help and Advice section; the guide to claiming ESA in that may help you to get some pointers as many of the principles in it also apply to claiming PIP. Do feel free to message me if you want to ask about anything in private. Very best wishes, Aviemorticia x

We will be delighted to hear from you and meet you and your son when the time comes :-) best wishes and in the meantime you are welcome to get in touch to ask anything you want to know in advance.

Hi, thanks very much for that; I have just posted a new thread in the help and advice section entitled Link to Coping Strategies Guides. :-)

New thread started at admin request in order that it may be pinned. Many thanks; I am honoured! I hope others find these guides helpful in part or in whole; we and our experiences are all different :-) https://plus.google.com/b/103773036814582919078/103773036814582919078/posts Aviemorticia x

Yes, it's wonderful to have it established here after people fought for it for so long This is the website: http://highlandoss.org.uk/

Thanks, Tanya! Robert: I completely understand, hope you find practical support and feel less alone. Thinking of you.

Dear Robert, I am very sorry to hear of your dilemma and that I have unfairly raised your hopes by posting a guide which has not been as helpful as you anticipated. It is difficult to give more personalised suggestions without knowing your circumstances in detail and I appreciate that you may not want to give any more details away to a stranger especially on a thread viewable by others but I have spent time today doing some research and putting together a few more general pointers. It really is important that you get support and financial advice in place as soon as possible; I would recommend that you contact autism specific services in your area who may be able to suggest contacts with a proven track record in giving informed, autism friendly and aware assistance. The National Autistic Society: http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/employment/looking-for-work.aspx You may also be interested in the work of Sarah Hendrickx who has written several books on autism and life situations including employment related matters; she is also involved with training and support services and is UK based so the law related information in her works is appropriate to your area. http://www.asperger-training.com/sarah-hendrickx/ http://www.amazon.co.uk/Asperger-Syndrome-Employment-People-ebook/dp/B0041OTALG/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1375962807&sr=8-6&keywords=Sarah+Hendrickx I appreciate that my own personal experience from which the guides were written is different in many ways from yours and I hope that others with more in common will see this thread and be able to add their own input. I wish you all the very best, Aviemorticia

https://plus.google.com/b/103773036814582919078/103773036814582919078/posts This is a link to the publicly viewable Google page with coping strategies guides I have written on the subject of disciplinary action at work, redundancy, claiming disability benefits, moving house and coping with large scale crowded events, specifically the Edinburgh Festival from when I lived there but the principles can apply to other events. I hope they can help others who are going through similar situations x

Hi, I have written some coping strategies guides to various life situations with autism and mental health in mind which have been accepted by Autism Initiatives and the CAB in my area and I would like to make them available to other members in the Help and Advice section but I cannot see an option to put attachments in my posts. Could someone please advise me how to go about it? Thanks! Aviemorticia x