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papagayo

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About papagayo

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    Norfolk Broads
  1. Many thanks to for those thoughts. I've always noted about myself things can just go straight over my head sometimes just after a few lines or words spoken, I can read and not take it in and listen and not hear. I will re-read these pasages again & again in the hope that some of it sticks. I am still resisting the temptation to go back into my past as there are some very dark places there. I have however recognised that I am too open in my speech saying things that are not always appropriate. Trouble is at present I only realise this when the words have left. I must try to be slower to speak and enagage my brain a little more
  2. I agree don't think I am so different but then again I must be. I recognised several things today that were 'aspi' going to be hard to stop them. Thank you for the reply
  3. Many thanks for taking the time to reply. A year does not surprise me, neither over analyzing. I'm very reluctant to even start but I will. Again thank you.
  4. Good Morning At the age of 53, a man, married with two grown children, 3 weeks ago I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. It should not have come as a surprise as one child has Aspergers and the other has Dyspraxia but we always imagined that it came from my wife's side of the family. For once in my life I was lost for words. It also came as a shock to all my close family with the exception of one of my children, who was the one who suggested I went for a diagnosis. The lady who completed the diagnosis is a woman I trust and who diagnosed both our children. She has a vast wealth of experience and knowledge and does not take lightly giving someone I diagnosis. I am not embarrassed by it, although I wont be shouting it from the rooftops, I'm just in shock with it and semi-denial. I suppose after 53 years that's hardly surprising. My first instincts were to get a list bullet points as what to do to get on with the job in front, which I understand would be my typical aspergers approach. I semi-resisted it as too the temptation to scroll back through the years and see if aspergers fitted the major situations good and bad through my life. In some ways aspergers would be a excellent excuse for the years of unhappiness depression and the family disasters I've help create and cause etc. but it isn't, it's only a possible explanation, it was still me who did what I did. Obviously I don't feel any different to before the diagnosis, I'm still me. In some ways I wish it was like catching a cold then I could feel it and perhaps have some idea what to do about it. The advice I've been given is to not do anything about it in a rush, wait until the shock and denial subsides. Try and live in the moment. It was said that really I don't know who I am, I've been acting a role for so long in so many areas. So now when I'm ready I can decide who I really am and be me. My wife would probably like me to be Brad Pitt, for my business I'd like to be Bill Gates . No I'm going to take my time and let all this stuff soak, when I'm ready re-play the tapes in my mind (I've done a couple and they gave me an 'Ah yes, I see' moment) I'll do it. It will be A major or The Major Task of my life to make sense of all this and adjust my behaviour etc etc. For the time being I'll let the next few trains pass me by while I mull it over before I decide to get on one and (pardon the phrase) 'Start my new journey'. If there is anybody of similar age and situation I would appreciate experienced considered wisdom on what you did and didn't do, that helped, pit falls to avoid etc etc. I have always sought advice on most major things before I make a move. Now is one of those times. Making the right adjustments and changes in the right time for me and for my family. Thanks
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