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baileyj

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Everything posted by baileyj

  1. Hi, I'm Jo, Mom to Max who is now 19. I joined this forum many many years ago when Max just 3 and at different times youve all helped and advised me. Were about to move to a new stage in Max's life, he's leaving college. I want to be able to help him find either a project or a job be it paid or volunteering that makes him happy and fulfilled. Max is very intelligent and can learn, but struggles with social skills and trusts everyone. We live in Worcestershire, does anyone have any advise where I can start looking for help as I'm just clueless. Thanks in advance any advise would be so appreciated.
  2. baileyj

    Back Again

    Hello All, wow its been 2 years already! Ive been a member of this forum for over 10 years now, though don't visit very often. Update on my Max, he's now a fully fledged teenager of 13 :-) he attends an autism base in a mainstream High School and absolutely loves it. There are 8 in the unit and 5 staff, he attends most lessons some with and some without support and has weekly speech therapy at school. Weve been very very lucky. He travels in a taxi to school with his friend. From day 1 due to the preparation before he started he has always wanted to go to school, much more so than when in Primary. 13 brings with it standard teenager hormonal moodyness, but hey I'm not complaining its just part of growing up isn't it. So, upwards and onwards with the adventure of life with my Max. Hope everyone doing OK, and maybe even remember us :-)
  3. Hiya, my son was dx Autism when he was 3, he only had a few words and they were copied from cartoons, he attended mainstream primary with 1:1, and bit by bit his speech came on. Back then I honestly didn't know if his speech would improve. The important thing is they go at their own pace, its different to peers, but thats OK. Also there is a difference between functional speech and conversation, his speech is functional :-) He's now a chatty 13 year old attending mainstream High School in an Autism unit, its fantastic. Keep doing what yr doing, get into the system and accept all the support that it brings. Autism units in mainstream are brilliant.
  4. Just want to say as a Mom of a 13 year old ASD son, he does all of these things, and reading this has made me really happy to know its a good thing for him, and helps him relax or cope with situations. Thanks for the enlightenment folks. Jo (Max's Mom).
  5. Hi, my son is 12 and hitting teenagerdom big style. Its weird whenever I hv a problem I look on here, and find someone with the same. Max is in "love", he's at High School in an Able Autism Base and they are fab, he travels to school everyday with Z, they get on great, but if she's not in for any reason he flips. Monday he's told she's going on a trip on Thurs, meltdown. Yesterday she went home ill, biggest meltdown school have ever seen, threw himself on the flow screaming, shouting, crying and holding his breath. At home even worse when he found out she's still ill today. This is totally new for me, I have no clue how to help him, he screams Noooooo, then cries and cries for ages, then is so sad for hours. He won't see that it will be OK. I'm really worried. I understand its hormones, puberty and loads of new feelings, I so wish I could help him and don't know how. Makes me very sad. p.s. Loupin I'm in the Midlands too :-)
  6. Hi, I don't come on here that often now, I joined many years ago when my son was 3, he's 12 now gosh. As always when I do pop on, I find someone has posted with a similar problem, and read really interesting replies. My son Max is 12 and loosing his temper. I know some of its personality, some ASD, some teenage hormones. I have found the answers really interesting, and I should remember to allow him to be just who he is when he needs to be instead of guilting that I don't do enough with him. Merry your post was so interesting to me as a Mom, gives me great insight into Max. Thank you all so much.
  7. baileyj

    Back Again

    Thanks folks, nice to be remembered, yes when i joined it was called Krism, and not many members, its certainly grown, and is still fab. x
  8. baileyj

    Back Again

    Hello All, Its been a long time, I'm Jo, Mom to my wonderful Max, now 10 nearly 11. I joined this forum many years ago in Sept 2003 when Max was 3 and starting the DX process. Back then this place was my lifesaver, so much help with DX, nursery and statementing, I don't know how I'd have managed without it. Through people who helped me on here, Max was statemented in Reception for 22.5 hours and is doing OK, though now in his last year at Primary with the dreaded senior school looming. Since then life has gone along, highs and lows as we all know. I rarely come on the forum, but when I do, i still get answers, thank you. Lately have began to dip my toe in again, and its great to be back. Hope I can help anyone with our experiences over the years, and am sure you folks will continue to be the wonderful folks that you are. Cheers Jo x
  9. Hi Kerrie, hope all goes well with the nurse today. It is a scarey thing to do, but you won't regret it, as you can get the help your son needs, be it autism or not. Good luck. Jo
  10. Hi everyone, my Max (10) has to have a brace on his teeth, the dentist wants to refer him to the dental hospital rather than a local orthodontist as he feels the dental hospital are more experienced at dealing with special needs children. He asked me if I thought Max would cope with a brace. To be honest I just don't know, as I have no experience of it at all. Does anyone else have a child who has had a brace, or has anyone on here had one, how did they/you cope? Many thanks Jo
  11. Hiya, my son was very similar, we eventually got him dry at 5, he went to nursery still in pull-ups. What we did was have several potties, 1 in each room, so he saw them all the time, then in the summer months let him run round with nothing on his bottom, I know not ideal, but he started weeing in the garden, which seemed to get him used to the sensation of needing to go by seeing it, when it happened we'd scoop him up and put him on a potty, so he began to associate weeing with the potty. Gradually we reduced the number of potties, and just kept 1 in the bathroom, so he started to associate weeing with the bathroom, then we bought a potty that looked like a loo, kept it in the bathroom, and finally went cold turkey and removed that. Also, all nappy/pullup changing we did in the bathroom, so he associated that with the toilet to. It takes a long time, and needed patience. Ive lost count the amount of times we sat singing in the bathroom, or all quietly cheering when he used a potty. Also because he could read, we had a chart on the bathroom wall, numbered with what to do, eg 1) pull down trousers, 2) pull down pants etc etc. Nursery had the same chart in all the loos too. Now at 10 we are starting to teach him standing up wee's by doing target practice in the loo at a ping pong ball, the fun and games continue. Good luck, don't loose heart, its just that our kids take longer thats all, but they do get there. Jo
  12. Hi all, hope you are all well. I would love to take my son Max, 10, on an abroad holiday, somewhere like Spain or Majorca. I think self-catering would be best, and preferably somewhere i can get Chicken Nuggets and Chips, as thats all he'll eat. I'm wanting a quiet, not too busy/noisy place, as Max wouldn't cope with that, and often tends to get picked on if hoards of children. Does anyone have any recommendations on resorts, as I just don't know where to start. Many thanks Jo
  13. Hi my son also wouldn't wipe his bottom, after a long time we eventually found it was because he was worried about getting his hands dirty. His Peidiatrician suggested we try latex gloves, like surgical gloves. My lovely local hairdresser gave me some (powder free)to try as a test and they worked a treat. We now buy boxes of 100 online, we keep a little bin by the loo, and a box of the gloves at the side of the loo, he pops a pair on, wipes, and pops them in the bin. He's now 10 and this has worked successfully from about age 8. We found we had to wait until he was ready to do this, and just took our time. Good luck Jo
  14. Hi, Ive been noticing similar with my Max, he's 10, but things started last year, just like you say, needing deoderant, hair appearing, shoulders broadening. Ive definately noticed a difference at home too, he's spending much more time in his room, doesn't seem to need us as much. Can't really offer any advise, just that your not alone, we are very similar. Cheers Jo
  15. My son, now 10, wouldn't wipe his bottom, he was terrified of getting anything on his hands, so not the same issues, a clean thing. The paediatrician suggested disposable gloves, we tried it, and its worked. We keep 2 boxes of disposable gloves next to the loo,and a bin, so he knows there are plenty (200) there, he goes for a no. 2, pops his gloves on, uses wet wipes, and then pops the gloves into the bin. Not sure if it will help, but may be worth a try. Really wish you luck. Jo
  16. No-one can help, I am dissapointed. This is the first time the forum hasn't been able to help in 8 years.
  17. Hello all, its been a long time since Ive been on this forum, however I always find its the right place to come. Hope everyone doing OK and are well. My Max is now 10, and still at his wonderful primary school, which he has attended since nursery with the same LSA. After his annual review 12 months ago, we have spent the last year viewing secondary schools of various types, as we were asked to. a) catchment mainstream school with support, mainstream secondary with able autism base for 8 pupils c) special schools. For Max the able autsim base is definately the best place for him, and was also recommended by the CCD team. Max is currently statemented and funded for 22.5 hours 1:1, which he has been since aged 4 on entering Reception. It also states 1 S&L session per term, and support from the CCD team to the school. I had a lot of help from this forum when getting his original statement, and ended up going to the LEA, and also had help from an NAS Advocate. Max's current school has always worked well for Max as its a small semi-rural primary, where everyone knows and accepts Max for who he is, and the staff, particularly his LSA are very exerienced in SEN. So, I get to the point. Its his annual review at the end of the month, and I have to write a parental report, which I do every year. I wrote my original one years ago with excellent advise off this forum. I'm desperate to make sure I write the correct things in my report, as I really want to do my best to try and get Max into this unit. So any advise I'd be so grateful for. Also when I spoke to the lady from CCD, who had originally recommended the unit, she is now saying, I name the school(s) at the review, then it goes to a priority needs panel in November! I'll find out after that. Oh also, I forgot to say, when we visited the able autism base, the teacher their, offered to attend Max's annual review this year, but CCD says that would not be appropriate as no decision for place will be made until November, so I don't know what to do about that one. Any help gratefully appreciated all. Many thanks, Jo
  18. Hi, I can't add much, but my 10 year old son does this also, when I ask him why he says its because his hair tickles. So I am putting it down to a sensory thing with him. I don't have any answers as I haven't been able to stop him, just one of his "isms" as I call them. Jo
  19. Hi, when my son started Pre-school at 3, he was awarded initially emergency support, which was reviewed every 3 months. During that time the various professionals came into nursery and wrote reports on him, while this was going on the panel are not allowed to withdraw the emergency support funding. This was all arranged by the childrens centre and the pre-school panel. We had a very knowledgeable teacher in the nursery, and they requested he be asessed for a Statement, as I remember either school or a parent request this, in our case it seemed to work better because school did. Also as he was being assessed for a statement, the panel again were not allowed to withdraw the funding. It takes months, but that meant my son started in Reception class with a Statement funding for 22.5 hours 1:1, so was well worth it. As some of the other parents say, get a copy of the code of practice, its really helpful, though the process is lengthy it guides you through what you need to do. I also had alot of help from people on this panel back then (2003/4), and help from an Advocate from the National Autistic Society, she was brilliant. I feel for you when you say you dread to hear the words, it is hard, but you do come to terms with it, and like us, will do whatever it takes to get the help and support you all need. Good luck. Jo
  20. Max eats his dinner on a tray upstairs, yesterday I asked him to "bring down his tray", which he duly did, leaving the plate upstairs still, it really made me laugh, talk about literal.
  21. baileyj

    Headaches

    Thanks all. Max does have sensory issues, he has very sensitive hearing, think its called hypercausis, he is sensitive to high pitch particularly, and if very bad wears his Peltor Kids headphones, which he's had for about 5 years, they are brilliant. Ive cut out the sausages, and the headaches are less frequent, he did have a bit of bacon at the weekend, and again a headache, so maybe a link to pork products. I do also think its stress related, often in the mornings before school he says he has headache or tummy ache. Weve only had 1 headache this week, he said his head felt sticky like a jam sandwich, which confused us, and he kept twiddling with one piece of his hair. Will continue to monitor and try and find the patterns. Thanks so much for your help so far. Jo
  22. My son was 4 nearly 5, we started training in earnest the during the Summer holidays before starting Reception. We had 2 issues, firstly about not wearing a nappy, and secondly wearing pants as he hated them as they felt so different. We discovered he liked his swim trunks, so we bought him some trunk pants, and called them trunks NOT pants, which really helped. We let him run round the garden in just a t-shirt, no nappy or bottoms, he sprinkled on the grass, (I know sounds yukky) so got used to seeing wee, and slowly recognising the feeling of needing a wee beforehand. The other thing we did was started only changing nappies in the bathroom, so he started associating anything to do with it with the bathroom only. We kept several potties round the house in most rooms, and again let him run round with no bottoms on, and kept sitting him on the potty. It took a few months, but slowly worked, for about another year we were constantly emptying potties, as he would want a wee, and immediately go in whatever room he was in, so wherever we went we had a potty in the boot of the car, and at relatives houses. Bit by bit we started removing the potties until there was only one left in the bathroom, it was one that looked like a little toilet, had a loo seat and everything, and we called it his special toilet. Finally we went on holiday to a familiar place, and didn't take a potty, said he was a big boy now, and he just accepted it. The thing is to be paitent, don't give us, and if at first you don't succeed, stop and leave for a while as they aren't ready for it. In time you will get there. My lad was out of nappies during day at 5, and during the night at 7. We thought it would never happen, but it does. Lots of Luck Jo
  23. baileyj

    Headaches

    Thanks everyone. Youve given me lots of food for thought. I will start a headache diary. He doesn't like it when its hot, but does drink plenty of water, in fact he won't drink anything else, again with food, he's very restricted with what he will eat, and theres been no changes, except introduction of sausages, so will stop them for a while as a test. I'm thinking his fainting at the weekend really frightened him, and he's been worrying about that. Yesterday, I pretended the doc was on the phone, and had spoken to a specialist (Max very into doctors at the mo), and said calpol and fresh air would be good for him. He was very interested in that convo and repeated it back to me. He's gone back to school happily today, we really played it down, and just stuck to normal routines. Fingers crossed, Jo
  24. Hello all. Hope everyone is doing OK. I haven't posted on here for a long time, but always find if I want to find out anything, this is the best place to come, so here goes. My son Max is now 9 and ASD, lately he keeps complaining of headaches, saying his brain hurts. On Saturday he fainted, but not sure if thats linked as jumped up quickly from a hot bath. Ive taken him to the doctors and they can't find anything. I honestly don't know if its a ploy to get out of school (this has happened before with tummy aches), or if there is really something wrong. He assures me he isn't pretending. Its always a guessing game, he just says "my headache is increasing to xx%". If I ask questions he will latch on to whatever I say. Has anyone else had this? Help please, as I'm quote worried. Jo x
  25. I didn't know you could fill in on-line, is there a link?
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