MiddleEarthNet
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Posts posted by MiddleEarthNet
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True, its the view that many people have that ADHD means the person is a trouble maker (which isn't always the case). I've also heard so many people say it is made up and an excuse and it just means the parents haven't disciplined the person. So even though there is the relief that there might be an explanation there is also the worry that if I proceed with getting a diagnosis that people (employers) would make assumptions. But then again it could also help with attempting to explain to people why I do certain things.
I love stroking my cat as well and in my hands at least I love stuff with a texture that moves. By the sound of it, you'd love a tangle hairy. I reccomemnd trying to get one.
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Yesterday I had one of those moments when just everything about my life just suddenly made more sense. And it actually felt like a relief. With diagnosises of Asperger's and dyslexia but with difficulties that never really fitted properly under those headings and the general feeling I'm more towards the autism end rather than Asperger's end of the spectrum. There are lots of little bits that (until yesterday) were previously disconnected problems - I had trouble sleeping, I was continually late for morning acivities (no matter how hard I tried not to), I've always been hyperactive, needing to burn off huge amounts of energy, I can't sit still for long, I'm a definite fidget and all the way through school I was classed as a troubled child.
Whilst searching on the internet for things to help with my sleep before I loose my job, I came across a website about adult ADHD that listed the exact sleep problems that I have been struggling to put into words, even right down to the 'can't shut my mind up'. From there I read through the rest of the descriptions. Aside from quite obviously I haven't been to the GP, it seemed to really make sense. Even the little things - my support worker has noticed that I fidget and has suggested deliberatly using something when I am stressed. I ordered a tangle hairy (and I love it) and was playing with it whilst playing a computer puzzle game at home. And straight away I noticed that I was consistantly getting better scores that I ever do normally.
I know Asperger's/Autism and ADHD are linked but I now think maybe I have ASD, ADHD and dyslexia. Even though in a way its a bad thing, it feels like a relief that there may be an answer.
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Thanks for the link. That is very useful. I'll continue to have a read through that.
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I wonder why it is higher on the autistic spectrum.
This subject has been bothering me for a few weeks now. I was born female. I've never felt female and would always describe myself as a tom boy. But I never really though of myself as male either. However my interests, personality, what few friends I've had, everything is distinctly male. Mum is always telling me off for buying boys t-shirts. And I hate with a real passion being treated as a girl. I've always wanted to be flat chested and I am so ashamed of, you know, that if I am changing in a changing room, I'll go into the toilets to change my top. And before I stopped wearing swimming costumes altogether, I would cover my chest with my arms. I also can't even talk about the other female stuff by name. It disgusts me. But until a few weeks ago that was it.
Then one of my support workers asked me outright. Not in a nasty way. But she thinks I might be and I might be happier if I went down that route.
Now I'm really confused. I don't know what to do. I don't know who or what I am or how I would deal with it in reality.
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Well several meetings later and apparently any support will only be temporary. Its as if my Asperger's just vanishes with their timer runs out. As well as the teams in place to help are doing a good job of helping me NOT trust them.
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Thanks, I'll take a look a their website.
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It might well continue into adulthood, but then it's less of an issue anyway so long as he can at some point be safe in a bathroom on his own. I won't wear a swimming costume at all because I don't like anything fitted and I don't like people being able to see my body (it got worse as I developed). But as an adult it's simple, I don't go into swimming pools and if I'm in the sea, no one would stop me wearing shorts and a t-shirt.
Anyway, how did it go?
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No idea if this will help or not. I've always been really keen on privacy. I couldn't bear the thought of mum seeing me in the bath when I was too young to be in the bathroom alone (I had a thing for locking the door and blocking the water overflow holes). Mum tried allowing me to have the bath in my swimming costume and it seemed to help. Now I won't wear a swimming costume at all because of privacy but it did get me though to the point where I could left safely in the bathroom.
Maybe swimming trunks might work for your son? Or would he feel happier if it was a male (is his dad) bathing him?
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This is something I've thought about a number of times previously but events and my mental health over the last five weeks have raised the questions again.
Do communication aids benefit someone with Aspergers? I know some aids are designed for someone with more severe Autism. When I am functioning, I am able to communicate but very often can't put what I actually want to say into words and either I am misunderstood or I don't understand the answer. However when I am having problems, first my speech slows and I can't use sentences anymore and then it disappears totally (at this point I'm functioning at the level of severe Austim). There's also the rocking and anxiety. Are there any communication aids that might help? I looked at the Autism Alert cards on the national autisic society website but they aren't right for me. One of my martial arts instructors suggested a set of written cards to help me communicate with my mum (ongoing problems). Does that sort of thing exist? I searched but only found picture ones. Also would a medic alert be of benefit? Being out in public and social situations causes a significant number if the problems.
I also have multiple allergies, which if I go the medic alert route I would include. But I have no idea how to write it when there are lots.
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I've never been in a relationship. I've not even experienced the emotions so I probably will never be in a relationship. Unless my cat counts of course
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For me it varies a bit. Since I have been old enough not to be dragged on holiday by my parents, I haven't taken a single 'proper' holiday. But I do go away for my martial arts. I currently just look online for somewhere cheap but my own room near the venue. I'm likely to keep on using the same place if I go to the same event for several years on a row.
I find airports really difficult, particulary on my own.
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I'll put my local council into a message to you but won't post it here.
Yeah, he's got pretty extensive notes
. I did have a social work a few years for a very brief period but they were useless. -
Hi, thank you for your reply. I don't want to post my local council as that gives away where I live. I haven't spoken to my parents about whether I stay at home with them or move away from home. The state I'm in at the moment, I'm not really able to make decisions.
I want to work and as I said, I do have a full time job but increasingly I wasn't coping. I don't have a support worker. The closet I've got is someone working for the council whose job is supporting people with learning difficulties or Asperger's in work. But he does at least have notes of all the things that have gone on since early March.
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Now that my home life, job and mental health have deteriorated to such an extent that I am signed off but can't face being at home so I am spending my 'working day' walking around, it has been suggested I move away from my parents home into supported accommodation. Problem is my local council consistently don't seem to care. They say time and time again, that because I am living at home, they won't do anything.
And no one has ever properly talked through my options with me. It doesn't help that when I get assessed, I am functioning so they don't see the times when I am not functioning.
Has anyone got any advice? I can't manage totally on my own and knowing my luck, I'm probably earning too much to get help but not enough to actually be able to afford a place ie my wage is really low but because I was working full time, it was just over the limit to qualify for help. But now of course my job and ability to work is uncertain.
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The exceptional skills are amazing how you are all able to do complex tasks in your minds store and calculate permutations must enrich your lives greatly.
For all the issues autism can create there are so many benefits I struggle to comprehend the reasoning of some NTs in their attitude the benefits of having someone with these qualities and abilities would be an asset to any company or endever that you would undertake.
I know that perhaps my reasoning of the NT mind is questionable but logically the benefits of having such skilled employees would be immense.
My condition doesn't generate such abilities they say I am high functioning but at times I question my competency and how my daily functions appear to have been overestimated, it's fascinating reading all your posts.
Um, enrich is not exactly the word I would have used. Curse is more like it. The numbers just stay there permanently. I can't get rid of them. I can't forget them and (with the exception of numbers and patterns) my memory is pretty poor.
I agree with your logic regarding work but it doesn't seem to be the case. So for all my abilities with numbers and 3D objects, I am unable to hold a non work related conversation at work. I find each day increasingly more difficult as more is expected of me but I'm not coping and I'm spending increasing amounts of time shut in the toilet just because I can't manage anymore. I think it would be ok if the NTs understood the sometimes exceptional skills but normally they don't like it. I've been a called a circus freak for mine. They don't like it when someone that can barely talk, can real off numbers with ease.
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Its not just the martial arts for me, I work in engineering as a draughtsman. I was six, when I discovered I had an ability with technical drawing and 3D objects (not to be confused with artistic skill - I am awful at creative art). Some workmen were in the house and one of them left their plans on the floor, which I found. I had never seen a technical drawing before and freaked the guy out when I proceeded to explain why their design wouldn't work because stuff didn't line up. They didn't believe me. Two days they found out I was correct
. At work people think I must recite the numbers to myself constantly. But I don't. I can remember thousands of wire idents from huge electrical systems and know instantly when one of them has been duplicated and then go back to exactly where both of the wires are to prove that it has been duplicated.Mihaela, I like maps too. I've never heard of low functioning Asperger's but I suspect that might be where I am. If I am functioning I am ok, but when I am not functioning, my ability drops to the level of someone who is severely autistic.
My mum always shouts at me for wearing boys clothes. She hates it. She says it makes me look queer but I don't see the problem. I prefer to look and feel of boys clothes. She has said several times that she wanted me to be girly so she could dress me in dresses and go shopping with me.
Mr Salvador, I love taking things to pieces, changing it and putting it back together.
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I've reading all the posts on here about ASDs and no clear gender. I didn't know how closely that was associated with autism. But I can really relate to what is written.
I was born female but right from the start have always described myself as a tomboy. Its not that I see myself as male, because I don't, but I don't see myself as female either. But it would be fair to say, I would have preferred to have been born male. I don't do girly - I don't wear makeup, dresses, skirts, highheels etc and I certainly don't do pink. I buy boys clothes and shoes and always dress like a boy. I have long hair, but that's more because I don't like the hairdressers, than any style reason. My interests have always been more in common with boys, even down to when I am at martial arts, I frequently get told to stop sparring like the men. For a female, my voice is quite deep, but in reality it is somewhere between a male and female voice - too deep for one, not deep enough for the other.
But at the same time, there are less women in martial arts, so there are less women competing for the top spots so that increases my chance of being in one of them (not that it will ever happen because of stupid AS).
I have savant traits. I don't know how much someone needs to be classed as a savant. I have a photographic memory for numbers and patterns and I can take any 3D object and rotate it around and open it out in my head. My photographic memory creeps NT people out. But I have Asperger's so I'm not low functioning.
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Sorry, I meant nothing has been made available to me. But because of allergies, it could also mean that I 'can' take.
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Thank you for explaining what PRN means. I don't have anything I can take.
For me, shutdown is when I go totally dead to everything. I've explained it to the others as if you have a computer that is powered up and you pull the power cable out. Everything ceases to work. But it has the potential to work if you reconnect the power.
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I tend to hide my rocking because I don't want people seeing me like that. I don't know how to explain why I don't want people to see.
I don't understand what PRN means but I don't take any medication.
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Interesting read. I have not read the book you referenced. However I have always believed that neanderthals weren't wiped out by the others humans at the time (I would need to check which ones) and that the different species will have mixed and evolved together into homo sapiens.
Genetics (both in relation to autism and not) has always facinated me. More specifically when you get what appears to be a genetic abnormality (I'm not refering to autism in this instance).
I have on a number of occasions seen people with a very pronouced brow and wondered whether that is a neanderthal gene influence.
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I've tried the breathing techniques but they don't work for me.
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I also hit my head into a wall. Normally the back of my head. I do it when I am frustrated and can't communicate.
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Yeah, we've got a sign on the outside of the door. Most of the time, it is respected but in the build up to the elections, it seems that people thought it was ok to ignore it.
Suddenly everything just makes so much more sense
in General Discussion
Posted · Edited by MiddleEarthNet · Report reply
Ooh, didn't spot the second reply whilst I was typing.
Thats a great description of how it felt.
Its not so much a diagnostic label, for me its the though that instead of there been sleep problems, attention problems, hyper problems etc as separate problems that are difficult to explain, it the thought I could say four letters and its an answer that I don't need to try and (generally unsuccessfully) explain.
Also, I used to get told off so often for fidgeting, playing with things whilst people were talking. And no one listened when I said I was still paying attention. So I tried to stop doing it but obviously that made it worse.