Clare63

TABLE (Donna - Great minds think alike !!!)

<'> <'> <'> Ah poor you, you sound knackered.... glad you feel better though for writing your "post" ..... I think we all know there are no instant solutions and anyway what works today may not tomorrow. But keep writing, getting off your chest is good therapy. Lots of <'> <'> <'> for you Clare x

MUSICAL

I can totally empathise, your post exactly like my household. My lad appears fine at school but our Psych. said its just a fascade he manages whilst there, but is in fact where his deep seated anxiety actually lies, in just only the past week the school has accepted this and are attempting to assess his anxiety levels at school. Like you I am very very patient, but sadly my husband is not either patient or understanding. The Psych says his behaviour when he's home is the relief of getting away from the source of his anxiety, he demonstrates his anger and frustration and relief directly towards us, his parents, because it is with us that he feels safe and able to be himself. All said and done the behaviour is not acceptable but needs to be managed.....that I am yet to discover. Clare x

CONGRATULATION !!!!! WONDERFUL NEWS WITH VERY BEST WISHES CLARE X

Hope things have settled down over night and things are not too traumatic this morning. I expect you are all exhausted. Thinking of you ..... Clare x

Thank goodness. Put your feet up and try to chill whilst he's on way home, if he's anything like Con he'll either storm off to his room or act like nothing has happened. Let us know when he's safely home.... <'> Clare x

Knee !

Oh Hev, that's dreadful, I can't begin to imagine how you feel and your poor boy must be so frustrated, confused and angry. Hope he's back real soon Clare x

"Shake"

Sounds so like when Con was about Reece's age, I too used to worry what the neighbours thought, you could hear his screams right up the street especially when it came to washing his hair, then he would make himself sick right there in the bath....lovely !!!! I must say though in the past couple of years he's got so much better where personal hygiene is concerned, guess cause he's old enough not to want me in there, but God forbid should he see a speck of dust or a single hair floating in the bath water then its all hell let loose. Pour yourself another one and put your feet up for a bit. With BIG <'> <'> <'> Clare x

I must say it was not the first time and I very much doubt it will be the last ! Thank you for your kind comments I really appreciate them x x x

Mel, thanks for listening to me and for your lovely reply. I know you have mega problems yourself with school. The TA had to sit with Con for the first two lessons and apparently it took him 20 minutes or more to calm down. The first thing he said to me as he got in the car was that he really needed his phone today as he wanted to tell me something....typical, but of course could not remember what ! Hope things improve for you and keep on at that school. Big hugs and thanks again for your support <'> <'> <'> Clare x

Oh Mel, it all sounds so awful, poor Jay, poor you. I wish I had a magic wand to make it all better for you guys ! but you must keep fighting, have you got a copy of SEN code of practice, perhaps you could start quoting it to them to remind them what they should be doing. How do they sleep at night ???, surely just job satisfaction if nothing else would make these people want to get it right for your son. My heart goes out to you. Clare x

Feeling pretty awful had to ask school for help to get Con out the car this morning, he was in floods of tears and refused to get out.... bless him the enormity of forgeting his mobile phone meant he felt unable to face the day. I feel somewhat to blame, as I use his mobile to reassure him that I am only a call away and that if he has any major problems at school and is unable to find anyone to help then he can call me (well he never calls just sends the odd text, like "I feel sick" or "I am OK can Jack come to play after school?") so I guess its become a sort of "security blanket" and his link with me whilst he is away from home. Anyway the Teaching Assistant who is currently looking out for him, very kindly came to help, got him sobbing out of the car with the promise he could borrow her mobile should the need arise. With tears streaming down my face I drove home with the prospect of yet another day worrying how he'll cope, not to mention the weeks now of double checking and checking again that he has his mobile. Sorry to off load but could do with a <'> Clare x

Just a quickie to say the day went well, my lad came out of school with a smile on his face ! and was so positive in telling me that they had changed his timetable slightly and that he has new maths & science teachers. The TA had explained the changes to Con and even wrote me note to explain what had happened...I was most impressed Here's to the meeting tomorrow and another success getting to school. Thanks everyone for your support last night and today <'> <'> <'> Clare x

Oh Claire poor you, big <'> <'> <'> from me. Like both you and Curra I am going through a simular period, forced myself to see my GP last week, she has promised me she will arrange some counselling for me, so hopefully that will give me an opportunity to let off a bit of steam. Its sad really that people close to you can sometimes make you feel a pain. I asked my Mum for help today to see if she would pop over in the week to help motivate me to tidy and clean the house.... its a real tip at the mo and being at a low ebb I can't seem to find the energy, inspiration or motivation to do it, but she said she was a bit busy this week.....I felt quite let down and wished I had not asked. Anyway Claire as you probably know all the wonderful people that visit this forum are right behind you, its such a wonderful "family" .....my advice just keep talking and let your feeling out. Take care x x x <'> <'> <'>

Don't know if this is any help but there are Diagnostic rating scales for asperger syndrome on OASIS (Online Asperger Syndrome Information & Support) http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/ The scales cover both child and adult ratings. Good luck x

Cool.... I walk my dog along the canel sometimes, I will look out for the walls ! Yes as you saw, I took on board your advice. Thanks for all your help, I am sure I will be asking for more so hope you don't mind x x x

Hi Ultramum, thanks for tip I'll have a go in a bit. Good point about as LEA people !!!! Cheers Clare

Hi there, thanks for your reply which I received on my email, well it sort of popped up on "My Assistant" box Don't know how to reply to you as I don't seem to be able to email back ...it keeps saying an error as occured ??? Anyway thanks for your kind words. It will be good to start chatting once I manage to work my way around this forum, I am not very PC lit. Have I put too much info about my where abouts ???? Clare

Thank you, thank you, thank you everyone, you have all been so lovely I feel so blessed to have found you all. Your kind words, thoughts and ideas have been an inspiration. Got my DS into school today by 9 O'clock a near record (we did get up at 5.40am and he was still awake at 12 last night !!!) it wasn't easy for either of us but we did it. Did get let down by school as the pre arranged meeting with a TA didn't happen, so had to wait for ther Head of SEN. Just hope his day went well.

Hi my name is Clare and I have just plucked up the courage to post a message on this forum. I must say I have been reading and trying to find my way around the site for a while now and think its fab, its so wonderful to see the support you give one another and I hope you will all welcome me into your "family" I hope in return I will be able to give support and share my own experience. My son is almost 12 and was DX with Aspergers on the 5th Jan 07, the whole process took a year to get a dx, originally he was referred with OCD, but I knew in my heart of hearts it was more. At least now we know what we are dealing with and are more equipped to provide him with the help and support he needs as an individual. School is our major issue, he hates it. Tomorrow we are back after half term and I know it will be a nightmare, he will be terrified, extremly anxious and his rituals (OCD) will go into overdrive. On Tuesday I have a meeting with special needs and they want to look at stratagies to help him in the class room and to discuss "social stories" to help me get him into school. Trouble is , without trying to sound too negative, he finds social stories patronizing, he is a very bright and I mean bright young lad (on the National Register for Gifted & Talented Children) so I feel the meeting may be wasted as they appear adament that the stories would work. Sounds to me like they have either just found out about them or been on a training course. Has anyone else got any views/comments on the success or not of "social stories" ??? Also I would appreciate any suggestions to help me support my lad with his anxiety, I just hate leaving him at school looking back at me like a little scared rabbit in a cars headlights ! I am not afraid to admit that I am at quite a low ebb at the moment, even my son's Pych, suggested I might be depressed and saw my GP last week who is to arrange some counselling. I just feel a bit over whelmed and don't really know where to start. Sorry to waffle. Looking forward though to being part of this forum ! Thanks for listening Clare x