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biker69

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Posts posted by biker69


  1. Thanks so much for all the replies. It isn't easy to make the right decision I did think that Glen would be ok at his club today, somehow he loves going so thats what made me think that he still isn't feeling well.

     

    Hi JeanneA

     

    sorry you son is not feeling good. If it was me I would go with my 'Mum' feelings :rolleyes: . If he needs a bit more time another few days or week off school isn't going to hurt :)


  2. Hi Mandapanda

    thanks for replying again :) I did ask him how he did so well the other night and was there anything that made a difference but he just said he didnt know and the panic just didnt happen :unsure:. as for talking to doctors and cahms we have done on several occasions but he is ok while he is talking to them but as soon as we are out of there he says he doesnt trust them and they dont know how he feels, it is such a shame there is no getting through to him. anyway thankyou again for replying much appreciated.

    biker69


  3. Hi Mandapanda

    thanks for replying again :) I did ask him how he did so well the other night and was there anything that made a difference but he just said he didnt know and the panic just didnt happen :unsure:. as for talking to doctors and cahms we have done on several occasions but he is ok while he is talking to them but as soon as we are out of there he says he doesnt trust them and they dont know how he feels, it is such a shame there is no getting through to him. anyway thankyou again for replying much appreciated.

    biker69


  4. Hi biker69

     

    Sorry to hear this.

     

    A psychologist where I work suggested getting my son to do star jumps when he started feeling panicky. Basically anything that may distract them, but activity also releases endorphins which make you feel good (apparently!). I was very fortunate that when I explained what a panic attack was and why it happened (why his hands tingled and he felt faint due to over-breathing) and talked him through breathing calmly etc, he learned very quickly to recogise them coming on and calm himself down. He really has done amazingly well.

     

    This time last year I was sleeping in his room cos things were so bad - I never thought they would change then.

     

    Thinking of you >:D<<'> >:D<<'> >:D<<'>

     

    Hi Mandapanda

     

    thanks for the suggestions the trouble is he is very reluctant to try anything which is quite frustrating, I have explained to him about panic attacks and tried to get him to practice breathing techniques but he just says that nothing will work :unsure: . on a good note last night we had a whole night of no panics and sleep from 1.30 am till morning :) .

    biker69


  5. hi mandapanda interesting post my dd 13 sounds much like yours ie sleep pattern etc and funnily enough i was thinking about deregistering her to home educate,my biggest problem being that she just wont do any homework the school set ,basically she just wont do anything unless its twilight :wallbash: but what worried me was then i get no help? or do i just wondered if you have any info as to where to get help from with this,big concern being if i were to deregister and then she still wont do work i'm really stuck :wallbash: and wouldnt know where to turn,shes not been at school for 18 months and although last term did 3 x 45 min sessions this hasnt worked this term and she has only been once,and ( up here we are on half term) although i asked school for work i didnt get any til the last day :wallbash: and then not much.but i admit when i told her she didnt need to go to school last term she did settle more,as you have found coincidence or not? who knows.but she had said she would work at home but when i got work still cant get her to do it ,and now difficult cos to siblings on their hols so she thinks it must be her hols too :wallbash: any way just wondered on your views,regards julia

    by way dd is 13 and awaiting diagnosis( although she is in denial) and wont discuss it.

    must really post as newbie cos didnt do that :rolleyes: good luck >:D<<'> >:D<<'>

     

    Hi jlogan1

     

    since we took our son out of school we have had no help whatsoever but it is still a better situation than him being at school and not getting any help there, all we ever got then was a very sad boy and useless teachers and 'professionals' promising all sorts and giving nothing :angry:.

    Has your daughter got a SEN and what diagnosis are you expecting because what we found out later was if there is an SEN in place and they are on the Autistic spectrum it is possible to access Autism outreach even if you Home educate, and as far as I know you could get a tutor sent to your home, it is worth trying to find more out about this. Please don't hold me to this it is only what I have been told and it seems like everything else you have to make a lot of noise to get it.

    As for getting them to do any work we find this very difficult and like your daughter our son is more happy to work at strange times of the night which is ok if you are able to do that. We don't work on a school style of learning we work mainly on life skills and stuff that he is interested in :rolleyes:

    We do get visits off the LEA man but you don't have to, I don't mind this and he is a nice bloke and gives us advice which we can take or leave.

    Anyway good luck :rolleyes:


  6. Hi

     

    We told Aw last night that we were deregistering him from school to home educate him. Interestingly, he settled down to try to sleep when we went to bed - not sure if this was connected or coincidental !!

     

    I am quite hopeful that taking this last bit of pressure off him will have a positive effect on him overall.

     

     

    Hi Mandapanda

     

    hows your son getting on now, is he happier now he knows that you are taking him out of school completly?

    We took our boy out three years ago and we are all happy that we decided to and have had no regrets, it hasn't solved everything he is still having major panic attacks nightly :tearful: he still has a lot of emotional damage caused by he's experiences at school so what he would have been like if we hadn't took him I hate to think.

    anyway good luck with your decision :rolleyes:

    biker69


  7. Downdate: (well UPdate sounds like something good :whistle: )

     

    Aw had a cold last week and his sleeping has gone back to how it was before. He's waking up at about 1pm mostly.

     

    I hope he will get back in a good routine again - he's done it once, so....... :pray:

     

     

    oh dear Mandapanda

     

    thats a shame it doesn't take much to disrupt the sleep pattern again does it. My son is still not sleeping and he had a sore throat the other night so of course that meant even later to get to sleep. :crying:

    you never know your boy might get back into the good routine when he is feeling better :)

    biker69


  8. Hi biker69

     

    Aw is sleeping much better overall. He's only had one night where he hasn't slept at all. He is sleeping in till about 11am some mornings, but it is not because he hasn't slept till 3am like before. Many mornings he is awake before this. It's such a relief. He finished the last Harry Potter book last night. He's read all 7 in about 2 1/2 weeks. He couldn't have concentrated to do this when he wasn't sleeping well. He used to say he was bored a lot, but that's because he couldn't concentrate and get involved in things. He said he's going to read Lord of the Rings next. I've tried many times to read that but never finished, so it will be interesting to see how he gets on with it.

     

     

    Hi Mandapanda

     

    that is some reading, good luck with the next book.

    our son sleeps in till about 11 ish as well but it doesn't make any difference if he gets up early he still doesn't sleep, we had a night last night of no sleep till 6.30 am so hoping tonight he might be a bit more tired. whatever you and your son have done to work it out we could do with the same here, oh well here goes another sleepless night :rolleyes:

    biker69

     


  9. I found school reluctant to give work as well. I suspect that if they give us work, we will be their 'problem' still. If they say son not doing anything, it is my problem!

     

    Aw is still sleeping at night (unlike me :whistle: ) but he's getting later again, waking up at 11am-ish some mornings but is still better overall. He's obsessively reading all the Harry Potter books at the moment, which has put all other thoughts out of his mind :wacko:

     

    biker69:

    Thanks for your comments. Where/how did you find a private diagnosis centre?

     

    Hi Mandapanda

     

    sorry I didn't reply before. We went to a place in Ravenshead Nottinghamshire called Elizabeth Newson centre.

    Hows your son sleeping now, still good?

    biker69


  10. hi mandapanda thanks for reply,yes i know diagnosis wont actually change dd,but have been told that there are a lot more doors that can be opened ,we have just got a brand new autistic unit opened locally,but have been told that cant go there or see anyone til diagnosed,but have also been told that ,makes no difference if she has traits she has triats,but will she tick enough boxes,had school meeting yesterday,bit of disaster they just dont seem to get it she cant go to school and they still talk about when she goes :wallbash: seem very reluctant to give me anywork so shes missed over a year of work,and where i have said forget about the social side and will worry about that when we can hopefully get specialist help with dx,ed psycologist says she cant do that and have to sort out getting her to school so going round in circles,and as others have said with sleep probs just not happening,last night she went to bed at 6.30am :wallbash: she reads but doesnt make her sleepy,as you have said healthy eating :tearful: whats that?,exercise well she does go walk abouts but in the dark ,she told me she went out at 6ish this morning and said it was cold but lovely out there :tearful::robbie: but have left her homework to do tonight so will see what gets done,hope your sleep plan still going well,thanks julia >:D<<'> >:D<<'> :thumbs:

     

     

    Hi jlogan1

     

    I only just read your post. sounds like we are all going through the same sort of thing not very good for any of us but it's nice to not feel like you are not the only people awake at some ridiculous hour and feeling a bit of a failure :unsure: there are so many experts who have such simple solutions if only they were there at the time when we are all going through these problems . we have seen so many experts and they never seem to understand what is going on you would think that considering they have spent years training to do their job they would actually have an understanding of our childrens problems and not just scratch there heads and look at us parents gone out and make us feel it's our fault :wallbash:

    we spent 6 years listening to the schools and ed phsycologists opinions on what would be best for our son until we all had had enough and took him out of school at least that took one big pressure off him. so ypu should definately listen to yourself on what is best for your daughter.

    does she feel tired at night and is just reluctant to sleep or has she got sleep issues, as I said in reply to Mandapanda I think our son has a sleep phobia because he can be absolutley shattered but still won't sleep until at least 3.00 am and thats a good night.

    why doesn't she like to go out daytime, the reason I ask is because our son hates to go out especialy where we live he is not so bad if we are at his grandparents.

    we have have also been today to a private diagnosis centre to try and get him a definate diagnosis because the NHS seem so reluctant to put down on paper what the issues are.

    anyway hope things work out for you both :)


  11. Hi Mandapanda

     

    well done you two! is he still doing well?

    I have got to say you could be describing my son. he has always had sleep problems but instead of getting better his sleep pattern is getting worse, we don't sleep til about 3.00 am earliest he has anxiety problems which result in nightly panic attacks and i do think it is sleep worries/tiredness that is causing some of these panics but what to do is a different matter. we also took him out of school three years ago which as you say takes the pressure off of them and a decision we don't regret because although he still suffers awful with anxiety he doesn't have to put up with daily pressure from schooling, anyway with the time he sleeps now we wouldn't make it to school in time :rolleyes:.

    anyway just wanted to say well done to you both hope it keeps going well :)


  12. I don't mind you asking. :) I think I've confused you though because I think I've used a metaphor in a literal sense. :oops: I was too anxious to go into see the therapist. The medication reduced the anxiety to allow me to very literally open the door and go in.

     

    I am currently having CBT and I have also had an assessment for specialist input. My anxiety was previously so high that even talking to these people was impossible and building up the relationship needed for therapy impossible. With medication I was able to take the edge off my anxiety enough to attend the first few appointments.

     

    BUT, it's also about the therapists being willing to be flexible and adapt. I'm having a much longer course of CBT than normal and we also deal with other issues and work in a very flexible way. I now get on very well (generally - I have my off days! :whistle:) with my therapist and can talk to her quite openly - but I would never have reached that stage without the combination of additional time and medical support to get through the initial appointments (I no longer take anxiety meds).

     

    Hi Mumble

     

    its not hard to confuse me :P I confuse myself sometimes! it's good that you are able to get on with the therapist and that you are finding CBT useful :)

    biker69


  13. Here's some information about it:

     

    http://www.thebowentechnique.com/content/faq.htm

     

    It sounds a bit like craniosacral therapy to me.

     

    K x

     

     

    Hi Kathryn

     

    thanks for that looks really interesting, lot of information. It does sound a bit like cranialsacral. We went to see a lady a year or so ago and she practised all sorts of stuff like that and while she was treating my son she made him so relaxed that he fell asleep, now that is quite a miracle as sleep and him do not mix, we could do with having her here :lol:

    biker69


  14. If it doesn't do any harm, then it's worth a go, even if it only offers short term relief. :thumbs: It sounds interesting - wonder if I can get it on the NHS :lol: :lol: :ph34r: - I can cope with consistent firm pressure but not light touch.

     

    Medication is a difficult one and has to be based on individual need. My personal opinion is that it shouldn't be used as a substitute for 'solving' the underlying cause but if it helps the individual access other therapy that they may not have been able to access (due for instance to anxiety) then it may be helpful. I for instance have used it to (literally) get through the door for other support.

     

    Hi Mumble

     

    I got to say I really don't want to go down the medication route, I know it works well for some people but it scares me a bit and my Son like I say won't even take a headache tablet. This is one of the things that annoy me with Cahm's, they will not give alternative therapies a chance.

    What do you mean by using it to get you through the door, what other support did it get you? hope you don't mind me asking :)

    biker69


  15. I've heard of this but not actually met anyone who's tried it. From what I understand it's a form or relaxation in which the patient has gentle movements applied to the spine and various other parts of the body (the gentle 'rolling' of muscle, nerves and tendons).

     

    Seems to be fairly well regarded and, from what I can gather, doesn't necessarily involve an never ending series of sessions (typically two to five sessions for most conditions).

     

    However as your son is AS, having someone touch him could be an issue so it would be down to the pair of you to decide whether that was practical/possible.

     

    Hi TheNeil

     

    yeah what you have wrote sounds right and from what I have read it sounds like it is a very relaxing therapy without pressure touch, so there is no worry about any discomfort and our Son is ok with touch as long as its not his feet, definite no go there :rolleyes:.

    Anyway I think we will give it try. Thanks for the reply

    biker69


  16. I haven't heard of it, but in my opinion, I would be wary of anything that treats the symptoms rather than the cause, i.e. it treats your son's manifestations of anxiety rather than seeking to remove/reduce/teach coping strategies for the actual cause of the anxiety.

     

    Have you spoken to your GP for their input/opinion?

     

    I have no idea what this technique involves at all, but I would be asking about how they intend to tweak it to make it AS friendly; for instance, some of the terminology and exercises involved in other types of therapy involve work on feeling states and non-literal language which can be difficult for some individuals on the spectrum.

     

     

    Hi Mumble

     

    thanks for the reply, I know what you mean about managing the anxieties we have tried different things but nothing seems to help. We have seen lots of so called experts over the years, and at the moment we are still attending appointments with Cahms but to be quite honest they are not much help and only seem to be interested in putting him on medication, but we are talking about a boy that won't even take a headache tablet let alone anything stronger.

    Speaking to the person about the Bowen technique it did make sense what he said and it seems to have good reports for reducing anxiety. Cahms did try cognitive behaviour therapy before but it wasn't making any difference at all and aside from medication I think they are at a loss themselves, so I guess we will try this idea next week, fingers crossed it may help :rolleyes:


  17. Hi I was wondering if anyone on here has tried this therapy for their children?

    Our 13 year old son who has aspergers and massive anxiety problems is on a daily basis hyperventilating and being generally tense all this is causing him to have a lot of pain round his shoulder,back,neck and ribs, along with having a sleep phobia so not getting quality sleep either. So I phoned a local therapy place and they have suggested trying the Bowen technique, and we have an appointment next week only thing is I am now wondering if we are just going to be handing money over and getting nothing back from it and our poor son still going through all this pain and stress, that sounds a bit cynical doesn't it :unsure:. Any thoughts much appreciated

    biker69


  18. Hi Lisa40 :)

     

    no help from me I'm afraid as we are going through exactly the same thing as you in fact you could be describing our 13 year old Son. He never sleeps till at least 3.00 am and now 5.30 - 6.00 am is becoming the norm and like your Daughter he would sleep all afternoon given the chance. He also suffers from panic attacks, has Aspergers and I think OCD. It is really impossible to know what to do isn't it? By the way we are also in Derbyshire, you don't think there is something in the Derbyshire air do you? :lol:

    Biker69


  19. Hello everyone

    thanks to all the replies and advice, much appreciated. Sorry sooze looks like i nicked your post :oops:

    Well there's still not much sleep going on here, we have even tried making our own lavender and hops pillows after watching BBC's 'Grow your own drugs' program, that hasn't worked but it did give us something to do!

     

    A few people have mentioned melatonin which we did try for a little while before but has I said my son has a fear of taking medication and doesn't like taking anything, and some might say this is silly but with him being scared of taking anything I would feel like I was betraying his trust to put it in his food or drink without him knowing, thats just me :wacko:.

    We would be quite happy for him to stay awake watching dvds or playing on his playstation until he was tired but I'm afraid he won't even stay in his room alone when we are awake so definate no go if we were asleep.

     

    So I guess we will keep going until a miracle occurs and he decides that it would be good to stop living like bats :whistle:!!

    Thanks again for replies

    Biker69 :)

     

     

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