LittleRae

Thanks Baddad I guess I knew the answer really. Unfortunately as we work at home we have WiFi so he can pretty much get on wherever and whenever he likes. I wonder if we can have password access - must look into that. Thanks for the reply LR ETA Wonder if CBT would help in any way here? Anyone with any experience of it?

Hi All I hope someone here can help me. My AS teen uses facebook - a lot. We've always been in favour of this as he expresses himself better online. Now, however, I have noticed inappropriate sexual postings on his own and other peoples' walls. He also replies to the dodgy e-mails from 'Russian beauties' and has even exchanged inappropriate pictures. When this first occurred 6 plus months ago, we closed his email and facebook accounts, did the talk, printed articles from internet explaining how inappropriate this was and how it could affect university/job prospects in the future. All seemed ok for a few weeks and then I discovered he was back on FB. We have put the net nanny on his laptop, removed the internet from his iTouch but he has managed to bypass all of these. I've downgraded his phone to the very basic so he has not camera or internet access. His psychologist recommends that he have no internet use whatsoever and even recommends taking the phone away. I cannot take the phone as he goes to school alone, changing buses on the way and I would be terrified not to be able to contact him and vice versa. I have been loath to take away the internet altogether as it is wonderful to see how he engages with his 'friends' online - which we have already scaled back to include just actual friends. It also allows me to know what is going on in his life, school etc. as he is not good at passing on any information about his life. My OH has had the conversation with him till he's blue in the face but the boy does not seem to get it! DS also has a diagnosis of ODD so he will not see that he has to curtail any activity and refuses to change his ways. Is my only hope to take away the internet completely? While we knew he was safe when we did this, it was quite frankly a pain having to supervise him while researching school projects, etc. Also, he uses the laptop to complete schoolwork as his handwriting is illegible. Unfortunately, due to the layout of our home and the fact that we all usually do our own thing in the evenings, putting the computer in a public area has not worked. Has anyone else had this problem and been able to sort it? Thanks LR

Hi Pingu I remember you. You won't remember me though as I have not posted much and probably not at all in the last couple of years. Hope all goes well with the home schooling.

HI Thank you both for your replies. I guess I have to let him sink or swim on his own with this one. I think I have done all that I can do for now. LR

Hi All. I've not been on the forum for quite a while. My DS with AS and ADHD (inattentive type) is in his third year of secondary school. We do not live in the UK. Secondary school has been wonderful for him. He has made good friends, seems well-liked by the staff and does consistently well in school work and end-of-year exams. He has become quite sociable and involved in a limited number of after school activities. Our problem is now he is due to take his first state exams this June. Currently he is doing 'mock' exams and it seems everything is falling apart. Over the last 2 months I have set up a study timetable for him, broken down into subjects and provided him with a list of topics within each subject to tick off when he has reviewed them. Even getting him to study at all is a huge stress. DS is very clever and often gets 100% in subjects like History, Geography, Science. As in his own words he 'does not know how to learn' I have been setting him previous exam questions to which he marks down bullet points to check he knows the topic. No problem there. I don't doubt him when he tells me he 'knows everything'. The main problem appears to be exam technique. I have gone over the papers with him, we've discussed what he needs to do, how many questions, etc. He has come home each day with the paper incomplete. He will not read the instructions, he won't read over the paper before he starts, he won't even divide his time between the questions. There was a major fallout and meltdown yesterday as he didn't have time to complete a long question in his English exam as he had spent all his time answering the short questions. I sent him a text this morning reminding him to place a tick on the top of the exam booklet each time he answered a question so that he could keep a tally of what he had done. His answer? NO!! What can I do? I hate to be lecturing him all the time but I cannot get it through to him that it doesn't matter what you know; if you don't get the answer down you don't get the marks. He has been using a laptop for homework and exams for the past year and it has really improved his work and he often is quite excited by homework, asking us to read what he has written in essays, etc. I'm at a loss what to do now. I feel like I'm talking to the wall. I would love to step back and let him get on with it, but he's becoming so frustrated knowing each day that he has not performed well. I dread the fallout when he gets the results. Has anyone been through similar? Any advice on how I can approach this with him? He will be totally devastated if he doesn't do well - we are talking about a child who has the potential to get A1s in everything. Thanks LR

Hi. I'm outside the UK. We had a ten-week course, where kids with ASD, ADHD, etc met for 2 hours once a week. This happened about 3-4 months before going to secondary. Each session had a theme and broke down what they could expect into manageable bite-sizes. They discussed moving classes, different teachers, different subjects, how to use a locker, how to make friends, what to say when meeting someone, etc. It made a huge difference to my lad and his transition was very smooth.

Hi all. Have had this problem with DS who is now 13. He is now on Desmotabs - 2 per night and has been dry now for a couple of months. However, he could still wet during the day if not reminded to go to the bathroom. We used pull-ups which go up to age 15 as I could not put up with constantly changing beds. If we go on holiday we take a supply just in case the meds stop working.

Hi Caroline I think the best book for that age is 'Can I tell you about Asperger Syndrome' by Jude Welton. The first page has a picture with one sentence on it, and the opposite page has more information, for the child and parent to read together. Explains it really well for that age group. The Kathy Hoopman books are really good also. When he's a little older (or if he has good understanding/reading skills) Kenneth Hall wrote a great book when he was about 8 - "Asperger syndrome, the universe and everything'. At that age, I'd start with the Kathy Hoopman books and hope he asks questions. Then introduce the Jude Welton book Hope that helps

Hi. It's a well known fact that kids (with disabilities and without) lose an average of 3 months reading age over the summer holidays if they don't read at all while off school. It takes a long while to catch up on this, so make sure kids read regularly over the holidays - even a book a week will make a difference. I've always continued reading with mine and provided word searches, crosswords and simple Maths problems - apart from anything else it stops them getting bored. I print them off and make them into an 'Activity Book'. Or your local book shop will have ready made ones you can buy.

Congratulations LouLou. Welcome to the world Naomi. Enjoy your new baby & hope all goes well for Kai.

Sorry to see you go JsMum. I've always read your posts with interest. Hope J enjoys his new school and that you can do something for you. Let us know how he goes

Happy Birthday Flora. Hope you enjoy the day :band: :bday:

Excellent!!

Well done to you both. I think Bid, that any mum would be proud of a son/daughter who received feedback like that from an employer at that age. Knowing the history and how hard you have both worked makes it doubly sweet. Congrats!

That's amazing news, J's mum - I'm delighted for you both. :D

Hi Saffronsunflower. As he's so young, you could try the bedtime story route. Kathy Hoopman has written a few good books about Asperger Syndrome - 'The Blue Bottle Mystery' is the first one. It would allow him to identify with the boy in the story and you could take it from there.

Hi Saffonsunflower. Welcome to the forum. Just wondering, does he hate the lining up, or just where he is in the line? My DS always had to be at the end of the line - it was years later before we discovered that he could line up, but hated having anyone standing behind him. If school don't want to co-operate with you, just take him in 5 mins late every morning & say nothing about it. Good luck

loulou <'> >< <'> >< <'> <'>

I'd like to join too, please, Cat. Will PM my e-mail address. A

I'd like to join too, please, Cat. Will PM my e-mail address. A

Hi B'smum. Welcome to the Forum. Don't know if this will help him, but my son took to it very well. 'How to be yourself in a world that's different' by Yuko Yoshida http://www.jkp.com/catalogue/book.php/isbn/9781843105046 For those who insist they are 'broken' (my DS went through this for a while) you could look at these http://www.coachingasperger.com/advantages.htm Hope things improve for you A

hi Jude. Sorry, in a rush so can't give you a full answer. We used 'Can I tell you about Asperger Syndrome' by Jude Welton. our DS was 9 at the time. I also printed off lots of stuff from the internet. I have the Freak, Geeks book but haven't given it to DS (now 12) because of the title. The question has been asked lots of times on here, so if you do a search it should bring up a few posts. Just remember that he may not accept it at first. Don't push it but be ready to answer questions as and when he asks Hope all goes well just found these: http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.ph...&hl=telling http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.ph...&hl=telling http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.ph...&hl=telling

Happy Birthday - have a great day! :bday: :drunk: :cheers:

loulou <'> >< <'> Hope things work out

Hi Caroline - don't beat yourself up about it - some things are more important than homework. You can use the summer holidays to do more fun stuff that will actually improve these skills. For the handwriting, get a tray and cover it in custard/flour/sugar (just one, not all three!!) and ask your DS to write something. Maybe make it a game, you write a word and he has to see if he knows what it is and then it's his turn. Very messy, but my DS loved it. With reading, when my DD was in the mood, she'd read lists of words for me. When she wasn't, I'd cut out the words and put them in the wrong place - for example, pinning the word 'door' on the TV and the word 'television' on the computer. She loved this, delighted to point out how wrong I was and putting the word in the right place. We also read every night at bedtime. Again, if she wasn't feeling co-operative, I'd be the very bad student reading all the wrong words and she'd have to correct me. I'm not from the UK so I'm not up to speed on the levels you mention. If he's into the PC www.starfall.com is a great site where you can work together or he can do a little on his own. Also flash cards are good - we use the Letterland ones and when she gets fed up just reading the words, we mix them up to make ridiculous sentences. You can also download the Dolch word list which gives you the most common words used. A