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hatter

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About hatter

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  1. I found both makaton and pecs not only provided a means of communication, but without a doubt precipitated Ivan's language explosion at the age of 3 1/2. I thought Ivan was going to remain non verbal, and will never forget the day when he first said 'I want' when using pecs
  2. Every family is different- I have a friend with 2 NT children and they always do everything together around the house- if gardening needs to be done then they all go out and do gardening etc. My friend spends her whole day entertaining the kids with craft activities etc. the children can't even watch a video by themselves- their mum has to be there all the time giving them full-on attention! I don't think this can be that good for the children- people need to learn to entertain themselves to some extent. I think the kids will find it really hard when they grow up and realise that the would doesn't revolve around them. However, my friend is really happy with her family life, and her kids are lovely- it works for them, but it would suffocate me!
  3. I just wanted to say that Ivan now qualifies for high rate mobility We were turned down a few months ago and I asked them to review their decision, I also wrote a very long and detailed letter explaining why Ivan needs more help than a 'typical' child. A couple of weeks ago I rang them because we still hadn't had a decision after 11 weeks, and they said they were waiting for a response from his consultant. Anyway it came through today- it's going to make getting around so much easier- I've got to try and get a passport type photo of him (not going to be easy!) for the blue badge application now. Oh, and Ivan used the toilet for a wee AND poo today for the first time!!!! (he's never even used his potty before, and never sat on it without a nappy before!)
  4. I'm from Sheffield, provision here seems to be pretty good so far, though it's early days (my children are still young).
  5. I would love some of these (badges) for my Ivan, but I'm sure he would object to wearing one as he finds new clothes very upsetting- I bought him one of those Thomas tank engine zip pulls and he refused to wear it (despite trying on and off for several months). Those window stickers ( Emergency Alert, Occupant With Autism May not respond) are a really good idea- I will definately get a few. Great link, cheers
  6. My son invented a super hero called 'Rescue Man' when he was about 4. Charlie (now nearly 7) talked in incredible detail about how he lived in a power station, the food he liked, clothes etc. I noticed a few months ago that Charlie hardly mentioned him anymore- then we were looking at a space book where it showed a picture of a shooting star, and Charlie told me it was a picture of Rescue Man dying
  7. hatter

    Clothing.

    Ivan has to have zips done up right to the top, also if I'm wearing a zip-up top/jacket it has to be done right up, including pockets! I had to hide all his winter coats recently during the really hot weather and then I start wondering if I'm being cruel by depriving him of the choice of clothes he'd like to wear.
  8. The fact that they're so vulnerable to bullying It affects them in different ways- Ivan is oblivious to anyone's malicious intentions (rough play, teasing etc), but he's so happy-go-lucky- he just goes back for more. Charlie, I have always felt is so vulnerable because he is so easily moved to tears- this makes him a target because his reaction is so extreme, for very little effort He has become so aware- it is really getting noticible how anxious he gets in social situations).
  9. Yes, I realise that introducing this topic as a bit of light refief was not really appropriate, some examples are really sad. Ivan is still quite young (and small) so a lot of his 'behaviour' is attributed to him being at the 'terrible twos' stage, though this won't happen for much longer, and then I will probably find out how cruel people can be (whether intentionally or not ) I suppose it really is a question of ignorance, where people don't even realise (usually) that they are even referring to a disabled person, so are completely unaware of the effect of their words etc
  10. A bit of light relief- I'm sure we all get comments when were out and about with our special children - sometimes I'm really cross at the time, but on re-telling the story I can see the funny side. Other times I let it wash over me, oblivious to the fact that I'll be thinking 'how dare she say that about my child!' a few hours down the line. Two spring to mind I was seriously struggling to get Ivan round Tesco, first I made the awful mistake of throwing his half-eaten cheese dipper away- I'd offered it to him several times with no interest - but now he's protesting loudly and trying to get into the bin. Then a lady with balloons comes over to try and cheer him up- as you can imagine that went down badly . I struggle round the shop with the usual thrashing and screaming and all the time keep my cool. Then Ivan refused to leave the shop and walk the 20 yards or so to the car. I wait patiently for about 10 minutes- I can't carry him and the shopping, I can't take the shopping to the car in case he runs out after me (yes, I know I should've used a trolley). I can't leave the shopping and take Ivan, because that sends him into even more of a frenzy- by now I'm starting to get agitated. Then a shop assistant comes over and says (in a broad Yorkshire accent) 'so they've not cured him yet' I could've swung for her! but was too stressed and upset at this point to say anything Another time Ivan was enjoying 'swimming' on the floor in Morrisons (he lays down and slides along the smooth floor- on every isle we visit). This is not a problem if it's not too busy (it wasn't busy), or if I'm not in a rush (I wasn't), so we were pretty relaxed about things. A daft old lady pretended to nearly run him over and said 'beep beep' - Ivan didn't react at all- I just slid him out of the way. All very relaxed- no problems at all. A couple of isles later we see the same daft old lady (she's only being friendly) who says ' I know what it's like my dear- I've just taken my dog to the vets' !!! I just smile and get on with it. Then I think later 'who the hell is she, comparing my lad to her dog - I know it was harmless enough- sometimes I read too much into things. feel free to add more.......
  11. Hi it was me who mentioned my concerns about AS to his teacher after she had brought a few issues up. The senco then wrote to our GP who has referred Charlie to both CAHMS and the unit where my other son was diagnosed. In fact yesterday I got the letter saying that Charlie will have his assessment sometime in September, also got a questionairre to fill in about him. Things are moving forward as Ivan got his statement yesterday as well . It looks like I'm going to have to have my head screwed on for this meeting, but I can't think of anyone to take along with me (practicalities of picking up Charlie from school, waiting in for Ivan's minibus etc). Thanks for the replies
  12. My son Charlie has always been on the silly/ daft side , and babyish speech has featured a lot in the last couple of years- even before he started is current school. He is particularly unhappy at school at the moment, as he feels he is not treated fairly by both teachers and other children. There is one boy who he has really bonded with, but their frienship seems to consist of being really daft, talking gibberish and rolling about on the floor together- the staff are fed up with it to the extent that Charlie is being moved to a different class next year (he doesn't know this yet - I'm dreading telling him ). He is in a predominantely Muslim school where a lot of the children speak English as a second language- his friend is a Muslim boy, so I'm aware of the possibility that Charlie may have picked up some Urdu or other language, but it still seems like gibberish to me. I think Charlie uses this babyish speech as a way of avoiding real issues- he was lost in thought on the way to school this morning and when I asked him what he was thinking about, he replied ' gujababa' (which he has prevously told me means someone with no hair ). I'm not sure if this is a characteristic of AS. In the last week or so this has got much more frequent, also I've noticed he's flapping his hands a lot, and I've not noticed this before, so it seems he is feeling particularly stressed at the moment. His teacher has suggested that I attend a meeting with the senco and herself sometime in the next couple of weeks, which I'm all for, as I just want him to be happy, and if we can work out any ways of helping him then that'll be great. I have got some information from the NAS on stratigies to help motivate him with his work, as he has very little work to show considering his intelligence. However, I don't hold out much hope, as the senco thinks that we shouldn't use any AS specific stratigies until he gets a diagnosis. Apparently he is not 'disruptive enough' and there are other children with behavioural problems who take priority. I also feel that his school work is, on so many levels, too easy for him (it took him all of 40 seconds to do his homework the other night) but when I've mentioned this to his teacher (who acknowledges that he's very intelligent), her reply is that his actual output needs to improve before he gets set harder work. He shows the characteristic lack of imagination and flexible thinking which means that when it comes to drawing children playing in the park, he needs to be shown how to draw a slide and gets extremely tearful in the classroom, as he thinks he can't do it. Then he gets called a cry baby by the other children . Another case is writing a diary where he just copied the example sentences the teacher had given them- his teacher either interperates this as him not making enough effort or that the work is too hard. His school social life is non extstant, as so many of the children go to mosque, and the one's who don't, Charlie doesn't get on with (despite my efforts with inviting children round to play). He is very aware of this, as at his old school he had lots of friends he saw outside of school. We have had so many tears about how he want to leave that school but doesn't want to lose his friend (the one who he's being split up from next year ). I really don't know what to do next and would appreciate any advice about what I should be asking for at this meeting. Part of me just wants to whip him out of that school and back to his old school (which would be a pain, as it's a drive across the city, and probably not an option anyway). It's just that I can see he's trying so hard to cope and I just want to help him sorry for the long post!
  13. I couldn't read the whole thread as it was so long and left me feeling very upset and angry. Just try to take comfort in the fact that if this guy goes out of his way to avoid poeple with disabilities then hopefully he will never cross paths with us
  14. Charlie saw our next- door neighbour walking along the street in her colourful hippy clothes and said, very loudly ' what's that lady doing out in her pyjamas?'
  15. I've just finished reading 'the little class with the big personality' by Fran Hunnisett who writes describing her experiences teaching a class of autistic children at a special school. She describes teaching each of the seven children in separate chapters, some of her descriptions made me laugh and cry all at the same time. I only hope that Ivan is lucky enough to be taught by someone with half as much compassion and respect for the children as her. It is easy to read, not too long- I only got it yesterday! A very warm, positive book- has anyone else read it yet?
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