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      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   06/04/2017

      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   Depression and other mental health difficulties are common amongst people on the autistic spectrum and their carers.   People who are affected by general mental health difficulties are encouraged to receive and share information, support and advice with other forum members, though it is important to point out that this exchange of information is generally based on personal experience and opinions, and is not a substitute for professional medical help.   There is a list of sources of mental health support here: <a href="http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=18801" target="_blank">Mental Health Resources link</a>   People may experience a more serious crisis with their mental health and need urgent medical assistance and advice. However well intentioned, this is not an area of support that the forum can or should be attempting to offer and we would urge members who are feeling at risk of self-harm or suicide to contact either their own GP/health centre, or if out of hours contact NHS Direct on 0845 4647 or to call emergency services 999.   We want to reassure members that they have our full support in offering and seeking advice and information on general mental health issues. Members asking for information in order to help a person in their care are seeking to empower both themselves and those they represent, and we would naturally welcome any such dialogue on the forum.   However, any posts which are deemed to contain inference of personal intent to self-harm and/or suicide will be removed from the forum and that person will be contacted via the pm system with advice on where to seek appropriate help.   In addition to the post being removed, if a forum member is deemed to indicate an immediate risk to themselves, and are unable to be contacted via the pm system, the moderating team will take steps to ensure that person's safety. This may involve breaking previous confidentiality agreements and/or contacting the emergency services on that person's behalf.   Sometimes posts referring to self-harm do not indicate an immediate risk, but they may contain material which others find inappropriate or distressing. This type of post will also be removed from the public forum at the moderator's/administrator's discretion, considering the forum user base as a whole.   If any member receives a PM indicating an immediate risk and is not in a position (or does not want) to intervene, they should forward the PM to the moderating team, who will deal with the disclosure in accordance with the above guidelines.   We trust all members will appreciate the reasoning behind these guidelines, and our intention to urge any member struggling with suicidal feelings to seek and receive approproiate support from trained and experienced professional resources.   The forum guidelines have been updated to reflect the above.   Regards,   The mod/admin team

hazma

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  1. Hello I have a 14 year old with aspergers and adhd.He is statemented for 18 hours support per week.His main area of issues revolve around social interaction and relations with peers. Sad After a very long long struggle we finally recieved his diagnosis and a statement. Up untill that point he had little support despite us trying various schools and basically falling through every hole in every net in the education system.Things were so bad in one particular school just before we got his statement that PP actually advised us to take the school to tribunal for disability discrimination.We were so fraught emotionally with all the battles that we did not have the strenghth to take it on. Anyway to try to cut a long story short he has now been in his current mainsteam for just over a year and has done very well.He still has quite a lot of issues with bullying and relationships with his peers.His statement says that he must recieve social skills support either on a 1-1 basis or part of a group.This was not started last year when he began school and was only put in place when we saw that things were deteriorating and asked basically why he wasnt recieving it. This was in feb last year and it took untill june for it to be put in place.At his statement review my main concern was that these should be in place when he began year 10 in september.They werent. Now we have had a phonecall stating there have been incidents regarding my child and several other students where my child has been hit and the boys in question have stated that my son wound them up by making innapropriate comments.These were not witnessed but my son admitted to making innapropriate comments because they were basically doing the same to him.He says this to me However when his teacher questions him why he just says Idont know. These boys have been seen to make comments to my son and my son is told just ignore it and get on with his work, My son was accused of being involved in a fight with one of these boys when he was nowhere near the vicinity.Thankfully it was sorted out and the school said sorry there was a mix up we thought it was your son because he has had problems with this boy.This same boy cornered my son the next day and asked him to fight.This boy had three friends with him and my son was alone,as he often is he said no.The boy then slapped him while the others laughed.I reported it and recieved a letter stating whilst we will continue to work to ensure your sons safety we must ensure he does not antagonize students.Im perfectly in agreement with this but no where does it mention about them antagonizing him. His home school book states that he is no problem in lessons and copes well with distractions and works hard.The problem Im finding is my son is repeatedly told to just ignore things and unfortunately cant do this all the time. I need to respond to this letter but am struggling to put my point across.I should be an expert at writing letters by now but still suffer writing block when it comes to communcating with schools. His social skills 1-1 have now been put back in an hour per week.
  2. Puberty book. Anyone used it???

    Hi my son is 14 and was quite late entering puberty,but when it happened it really happened. I just found being very open and talking in very clear language and answering any questions worked best for us.I think the difficulty he faced as do many aspergers children is that physically they are developing as all other children are,but emotionally they are often behind by quite a few years and it can make them feel even more out of touch socially than they already are.Ive used books throughout his life for various reasons ,though not specifically puberty ones so cant advise on that,the book your talking about sounds good.Books in general both for us as parents and for the kids themselves I think are beneficial.There are books for AS teens in general that cover all issues,I think its just a case of browsing online.Amazon do a fantastic range .Good luck
  3. Advice wanted

    Hi Thanks for all your replies and great advice as always <'> Ive spoken to the Senco,but she kind of fobbed me off,saing that particular comment was just" teacher speak" and didnt really mean that he was expected to develop those skills overnight.Im getting a strong feeling this TA has no AS awareness whatsoever,TBH. Seems she is the SENCOs protege however. I was extoled a list of her many talents.Young but has a degree in psychology,has worked with children with various difficulties before,but AS,ADHD ASD were not mentioned.On a positive note and to be fair this particular TA has been positive on occassion in his book,but this tends to be lessons where his behaviour has been exemplary,such as library lessons.Im getting the feeling she is just treating him as a naughty child,and just dosent understand him.He has no problems so far with the other 3 TAs,they were part of a whole school training day,just before my child started the school.He was one of quite a few AS kids about to join.They just seem however to have a certain level of understanding and seem to be able to tune in to his wavelength.Not that he is always fantastic with them,but they know how to deal with certain situations quickly with the minimum of fuss.Think its one of those situations Im going to have to watch,in order to work out how best to move forward.
  4. Advice wanted

    Hi My son,who has Aspergers,developmental co-ordination difficulties and ADHD is in his first year of upper school yr 9,he has a statement of 18 hours per week.Not getting on too bad but has had a few problems with one TA. In his home school book she wrote this "H worked well but needed prompting.He 'fell out' with a member of his group and was heard rudely insulting her. Team work is essential,hopefully this will be resolved by next lesson. H you must participate more in group sessions." Im unsure how to respond to this. Whilst Im pleased to be informed of where problems occur,and happy to work on targets with him and the school,surely targets need to be achievable and realistic. My son complains that nothing is said to the other kids when they antagonise him,and when he questions this, he is told" Im supposed to be concentrating on you,not anyone else" I was hoping some of you could give me your take on this.
  5. Access the full curriculum?

    I was wondering about this.My son is starting GCSEs next year,and I am not happy about him missing certain academic subjects.I asked the SENCO if he could be removed from PE,for social skills work.He struggles enormously in that subject,gets bullied and just hates it.He does outside activities loves riding his bike,takes karate ect,so no problem with his fitness just hates the lesson.The SENCO said she would look into it but believes it to be against the law as its a mandatory subject.So if anyone can advise me on this,or where to go to get advice I would appreciate it.
  6. New here - glad to have found you!

    Nice to meet you.There are various ways to build self esteem and confidence.With my own son I have had him involved in out of school activities since he was little,with my child I started him in karate as it still involves working with other children,yet is not overly social so he found it quite easy to cope with at first.It also builds confidence,however any activity that may interest him would be good ,not nessesarily sports.Its great that the school are being supportive.When you say that he is in the closet do you mean that he has been diagnosed but you have chosen not to tell anyone,or did you not feel comfortable to get him assessed and diagnosed?I can understand your worries about labelling your son,but I must admit that since my son got his diagnosis he has grown in confidence.He had spent a good many years of his childhood feeling lonely isolated,uhappy.Thinking and being told he was strange,odd,or just plain weird.Trust me those are the labels that seriously do the damage.Also you say he mostly gets away with it,but if hes lonely and isolated then he isnt getting away with it,its affecting him.At 8 years old he is smart enough to realize he is different,he has probably known this for sometime,and not knowing exactly why is probably not helping.Please dont think Im trying to tell you what to do.You as his parents must do what you feel is right.From my own personal experience though its more helpful to have certain labels that will lead to the right support for your child than all the unhelpful and negative labels that he may be given.
  7. CRIKEY

    I didnt realize I had been away so long!!!! It says my last post was dec 2008
  8. Statement and high grades

    We got told this so many times,by present teachers actually.Our child achieved level 5 for his sats and his IQ currently assessed as being 120.I ignored it and started the ball rolling anyway.We have just recieved our proposed statement,so go for it!
  9. problems with ridiculous school

    Thanks for your replies. Thing is Ive written letters ,e.mails so many times I think its time to start looking elsewhere.The funny thing about it is they have an aspergers boy at the school already and a precedent seems to be set on what all aspergers children should be like. They havent contributed zilch,or supported us through assessment process and I know its down to the complex needs that came out with the 2 main dx that we got statement at all,plus the fact that L A knew we were not going to go away,however I agree that if the schools got an absolute rubbish attitude then a statement is going to get us nowhere.They cant put in simple strategies recommended by ed psych,then I have serious doubts they can or will implement the statement,it will be battle after daily battle.
  10. I say problems again but in truth they are non stop.School my son attends has never made any effort to support him,head is from ice age,senco walks round in a daze,many teachers are in my mind quite emotionally abusive to my child.Though Ive got to give credit to a certain few.Anyway he was only diagnosed in june First with ADHD then aspergers,school has never wanted to accept either dx.I put in for stat assessment in March got turned down appealed,ect anyway cut long story short we just heard he will be getting a statement.This was after we were told by various members of staff at school youll never get one hes too bright ect.The new deputy head is one of the teachers who my son is really struggling with,he hasjumped on the heads bandwagon and refuses to accept dx even though he has known my child just a few weeks.In every communication he is writing things like"He chose to behave in science,he chose to behave in history"or"he chose not to behave in maths"ect and he is underlinig the word chose. Today he threatened my son with the police as he says he assaulted a boy on friday.The boy was from another class and the teacher was telling my son to get out of her lesson this boy grabbed my sons bag and my son kicked the wastepaper bin at him.This is the same boy who bullied my son last year on one occassion slamming his head into a wall,this was one of several assaults my son had to put up with last year from different people.I was told he asked for it because he irritates and annoys.No mention of police then! I want to make a note in his home school book what should I say?
  11. Appealing exclusions

    Thanks for all your replies,sounds as though most governers will close ranks with the school Wont go into whole story but our Son 12 is aspergers and adhd.Just recently dx in June.Ed psych been into school 2 times written 2 reports full of strategies,none of which the school has implemented.We have been in and out of school for meetings written letters but situation continues,teachers are not informed of his needs or difficulties,senco is as much use as a chocolate t-pot,and their way of dealing with him is to isolate him,berate him,single him out,question his dx,tell him to grow up,ect,ect,ect. wednesday,before half term he came home and soon after I recieved a phonecall from head saying he had,had a bad day completely disrupted his lessons.When I asked which lessons it turned out to be 2 lessons he had run out of and hidden.Other 3 lessons were perfect.I was told that the following day he would miss the sports event,all the other children were going to school in their p.e kit,but he was to come in his school uniform,to the heads office for a formal meeting to re-sign the home school agreement,after which he would spend the whole day in isolation,catching up on work of previous day.Well after coming of the phone I spoke to my son (or tried to)and he got himself into such a state that lasted long into the night. As a result of that I knew it would be disastrous to let him attend school the following day.That was Thursday,On friday morning recieved a letter informing us that he was excluded for a period of 2 days.Luckily I had kept him home Fri as the letter came after he should have left for school.I dont feel the head has followed any guidelines.Ive never appealed an exclusion before but feel that I must this time.
  12. advice needed please

    You can go to SENDIST on the grounds of disability discrimination,Im sure.His rights as a disabled child are being walked all over.
  13. Appealing exclusions

    How many of you have appealed exclusions to the governers of your school?,and were they successful?
  14. Aspies better looking

    My son is stunning I have to admit.He is very angelic looking with the most beautiful eyes and long lashes.
  15. Turned down for statutory assessment

    You lose absolutely nothing by appealing.We appealed to SENDIST and as soon as the local authority were informed of appeal from SENDIST they backed down.
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