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oldest 7= struggles with knife n fork eats with fingers, falls out of bed constantly so has rail, is good at going to the toilet but wont alone,too anxious, wakes us up in night to go with him, can dress himself but struggles with zips and buttons,cant put shoes on at all, more of an issue is lack of co-operation and total resistence when getting dressed which makes us late for scholl every day. middle son 5 1/2 = eats with hands as cant hold knife and fork properly, cant dress himself mainly top half cant even pull ants up after toilet,cant do shoes or socks and again no cooperation at all he is incontinent of faces so wears nappy in bed, if in bathroom will only play with taps,wees anywhere and everywhere,babies potty or out back door, needs a bed rail as falls out, 3 year old sister= dresses herself since 18 months, toilets herself though gets up to no good in bathroom, sleeps on top bunk and doesnt fall out,refuses to eat constantly,squishes with fingers or throws on floor, very independent

my two boys 5 and 7 eldest has asp,adhd,dyspraxia and sensory int dysfunction, 2nd boy has been in process for 3 year, no diagnosis as yet but shows more autistic signs than his brother, eldest boy who has the diagnosis is oversocial just does so in a nutty way,undiagnosed avoids all social contact etc doesnt make much sense i know but not all aspie kids are unsocial

HI all i have 3 children 7 and 5 year old boys and 3 year old girl eldest dx asd,adhd,dyspraxia and sensory integration dysfunction. little girl referred but we have to wait and see how she copes in nursery. our problems are with our 2nd son. who has been in the process for 3 years now. paed says he doesnt fir on spectrum, to us this is an issue as we are 110% certain he is. diff like, severe obsessions like germs,wont get in bath unless bleached in front of him, he sits in the corner hand flapping when stressed, he constantly lines objects up and doesnt play with toys, he is very violent and aggressive esp to parents and siblings, he thinks he doesnt belong in family cos he only one with blue eyes, he cant dress himself, is incontinent both ways,falls over 12 plus times a day, needs constant twiddling and sensory stimulation, no eye contact whatsoever, avoids interaction at all costs, sleeping difficulties, hyperactivity,total defiant and oppsitional, speech is formal and learned,in school they cudnt cope so had one to one all year,said he cudnt be in class without support, he sat in corner with back to class rocking and squealing. To us these are a little more than traits they are real issues that affect him at all times, he has been discharged from speech therapy cos he has speech, which aspergers children do. paed not concerned when showed videos of 6 weeks hols she told multi agency behaviour was fine, the video was shocking hand flapping, battering friends and siblings, lining up objects, all apparently, normal. does anyone have any advice as we cant wait another 3 years he is getting more violent each day and needs help now, paed said he too young to look at adhd even though she diagnosed his brother at his age. i cant find an asd proffessional to show videos too. we have asked for 2nd opinion, anyone experienced dr ******** in liverpool autism pathway. any advice would be welcome we feel he has been treated badly by paed who is top doc in liverpool who has ignored all school reports since nursery that clearly point to asp,adhd. edited by moderator to remove name of doctor

<'> hi i have 3 children 2 boys 5 and 7 and 3 year old girl, all 3 have been referred to paeds, 7 year old boy dx asd(aspergers)adhd,dyspraxia and sensory integration dysfunction, 2nd son nearly 6 been in diagnosis process for 3 years he has identical difficulties though shows ,more autistic traits like hand flapping, paeds cant decide, little girl is about to start nursery but will be monitored. I fully understand how difficult life must be especially on your own, you are a star.

anybody got any information on second opinions,or complaining about paeds treatment of parents and child anyone had second opinion done, what were the results? where, how? and has anyone gone private or been to an assessment centre for diagnosis, if so where?how much etc. any advice would be gratefully recieved, thanks, alex

we have 2 boys, both had number of obsesions 5 year old= spongebob squarepants thomas thetank diggers water/taps making inventions digging in mud blood dr who/daleks playstation colour blue, only eat off blue plate, wear blue ect symmetry, everything around him has to be symmetrical or he moves it rocks/stones/sticks collections toy story number patturns 7 year old = spongebob squarepants steam trains hornby railways colur red liverpool f.c especially stephen gerrard and dudek dr who playstation football games hisrtory sabes,swords,toy guns goalkeepers daleks draughts/game

thanks all, d is sitting in class squealing in corner and swinging a string of beads, if teacher can get his attention he will write a sentance but only with one to one support. thats the hard thing, the teacher says h has good days so proffs think it isnt pervasive. teacher feels he has autism but masked to others like something else, like he shows oppositional defiance of adhd and that behaviour masks the root concerns of autism. it confuses me cos at home he cant switch off his autism traits, he just hides them well in certain situations and has good coping strategies especially in clinics, also in clinics on one to one he is not the same child.

sorry its a bit of a long . Wondered wether anyone has any advice cos i really dont know what to do. i have 3 children boy 7, boy 5 1/2 and girl 2 1/2, eldest 7 has been diagnosed asd (aspergers), adhd, sensory integration dysfunction and bad dyspraxia. my second son i was concerned about from 18 months due to lack of play, no interest in drawing, and hypersensitive to all around. of course the health visitor said i was nurotic and he was a normal little boy. however 2 days into school nursery and i was called in. they had real probs with him, lining up,would not join in anything, hypo and inability to sit still, unable to dress himself etc. both my boys were ok until 3, ok except for hyperactivity etc.no significant autism symptoms, however both boys almost overnight at 3 lost all eye contact, and autism stood out, obsessions, lack of understanding of the world, interaction was odd, odd reactions to noise, crowds etc. they battled on with him in school. 5 year old was in clinic waiting room at 7 year olds appointment and paed saw his behaviour in clinic and said refer him to me. then he began the long process, eldest took 4 years. d s behaviour in clinic was noted, lined up chairs,played with shutters instead of toys which he threw, no eye contact at all, no response to questions,she said he had clear adhd. second paed clinic appoint saw another of tem, she said he had lots of asd traits and his behaviour in clinic was very odd. he was seen by speech n lang,they said he was fine, his brothers lang assess all said fine cos he has advanced aspergers speech. my boys can tell you scientifically how steam is generated but cant tell me if they are sick or thirsty. its mechanics of lang they dont understand and communication probs. d saw ot, surprising to us she said he was fine, this is a child nearly 6 who cant dress himself,faals over constantly, bumps into things and has too many sensory probs to mention. the paed went into school. as ever she went in when kids were doing sports day, he wanted to join in which he doesnt normally,she said he dressed himself, seems odd when teachers said he cant too. so she saw him on a good day and has come to the conclusion d is fine,no problems. dan is very complex,he has many adhd behaviours like cant sit still even to eat a meal, hyperactivity, cant stay on task,poor attention ect, also asd traits, he constantly lines objects up, many obbsessions like blue, only wear blue,eat off blue cup, symmetry is another everything around him has to be symmetrical, dr who and spongebob are others. ,all his play is odd he has 2 close friends but rarely talks to them plays alongside them, he is now hand flapping big time, spinning objects on string around neck, constanly got bottles,dummies,twiddles stickers. had a 4 months period in school at end of term when he lost all bowel and bladder control due to being too anxious of the pipes in the toilet, he has little understanding of the world around him which causes most of his extremely challenging behaviour.he was once a loving boy always cuddling, now if you hug him he head buts you or punches you. his behaviour was getting odder by the day so i videoed him over the whole 6 weeks as proffessionals had said he was fine and i knew it was ######. we had been to cahms for a year after j was diagnosed for therapy, ended up about d and she was convinced dan had emotional probs, caused by home as they manifested more in home than anywhere else.we referred ourselves twice to social serveces and their conclusion was we were great parents and cahms wee wrong. i was really getting miffed now so wrote stupidly rather a nasty letter to cahms saying how the proffessionals were inconsistant not d as they couldnt agree. school report backed all our concerns up, reading his report aspergers smacks you in the face. letter was read by sally 20 pags on wot i thought of the proffessionals. she read in and decided we needed a multiagency meeting which we had yesterday and she gave the first of the 5 videos to each to look at, not the last one with 6 weeks of really disturbing behaviour. we arrived and were alone of course all the proffessionals were in room drinking coffee we were left in waiting room. we were so hopeful with the video evidence and school report we were in for a shock. they went around each saying wot they thought of the video. ot said co ord was fine and wot sensory problems was there(the vid shows dan in constant stim of some kind,struggling to get dressed,unable to work a knife and fork.) cahms were next, at one point of the video d was standing on the telly with a brush bashing the wind chimes off the roof, cahms said he was just having fun, to me it id destructive unnormal behaviour and would she of liked her house destroyed like that and think its normal, they went around all of them, each saying only the positives they had seen not, the challenging clearly asd behaviour the vid showed then they got to paed, she said she was confused and looked as us as if we were making it up, she had all school reports in front of her and had ignored them, said she had no evidence of asd. and proff thought he was fine. i walked out at this point, said i wasnt making it up and left hubby in there on his own. they made me feel like i was making it up. i couldnt believe they ignored the lining up, the hand stimming,the inapp play, the violent outbursts. d has been in school 6 days, they say already they cant cope and have had to hire own support for him, he is sitting in corner spinning objects and squealing all day. the whole thing makes no senses to us at all. i only know for sure what we see every day and that is asd,adhd,defiant oppossional behaviours. all of which my diagnosed child does, like cant cope with change in routine etc. my little girl has very little speech she is starting nursery in january she cant let us know her needs verbally, spends all day lining objects up and screaming because she doesnt understand whats going on around her like daddy going to work, she screams for 50 plus mins, thinks she will never see him again. she twiddles labels, has got out of car seat since 7 months and hates books and tv. to me these are odd and a concern but like d we will be told she is fine. dont know what to do, ask for second opinion, move his school to local asd orientated school which was suggested by paed or give up now and let him fail and get expelled for his behaviour. any ideas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

both our families are same, my parents especially say both our asd boys are just naughty, we not firm enough, they are apparently ok in their house mmmmh. weve had em all, food they eat, parenting, we awere apparently just after labels for our children and because we pushed for diagnosis we have taken their chilhood away, they are apparently normal little boys, ( who have asd-aspergers, adhd,sensory integration dysfunction and dyspraxia). i thought family was supposed to support you not make infuriating comments, like, "i wouldnt let him get away with that", "they are fine in my house", " he needs a good smack"ect.

MY SONS 5 AND 7 BOTH STIM, THEY, FLAP ARMS LIKE A PUPPET WHEN EXCITED, TWIDDLE LABELS AND CHEW CLOTHES WHEN NERVOUS, FLICK FINGERS IN FRONT OF EYES WHEN BORED, BASH HEAD WITH FISTS WHEN SCARED. 5 YEAR OLD HAND FLAPS, 7 YEAR OLD WHOLE BODY FLAPS LIKE A PUPPET DANCING. FLAPPING IS ALWAYS NOTICABLE ESPECIALLY IF RUNNING.

BOTH MY BOYS WERE NORMAL BABIES AND TODDLERS THOUGH SOMEWHAT HYPERACTIVE, ALMOST OVERNIGHT AT 3 THEY BOTH REGRESSED TO HAVE NO EYE CONTACT, LITTLE UNDERSTANDING OF THE WORLD AROUND THEM,LOST ALL SPEECH THEY HAD, WENT BACK TO POINTING AND GRUNTING, COULD NOT DRESS THEMSELVES, TOILET THEMSELVES WHEN HAD PREVIOUSLY, HAND STIMMED, LINED OBJECTS UP, ETC,ETC, REGRESSION IS STILL GOING ON IN BOTH BOYS, 5 AND 7. NURSERYS ALSO NOTED THE OVERNIGHT CHANGES IN BOTH BOYS.

seems to be a patturn of gorgeous kids, my 3 included, all with extra long,thick eyelashes and gorgeous eyes maybe it is an asd thing, long thick eyelashes.

i have simailar problems but cant get 2nd child diagnosed he is so autistic, hand flapping and everything else they cant seem to see what is in front of their eyes. 1st son dx asd,adhd,dyspraxia,sensory integration dysfunction. anyway thats a different story. does your ds2 go to school, what do they say about his innattention,hyperactivity,aggression. school needs to back you up. just note everything down you notice and show paed each time you go, eventually they will listen. all my 3 go to same paed, 1st child agree with diagnosis, 2nd dont and 3rd is only 2. do think it is generally harder to get a 2nd child diagnosed for some reason, like its unheard of or something. PARENTS KNOW BEST, thats all i know. if you had read about adhd and thought that sounded like your child you would be right. just it can take years to get the evidence and diagnosis which is the most frustrating things for parents. my paedsaid my 2nd child has no motor problems, why then is he nearly 6, cant feed or dress himself or hold a pencil let alone right. i think these proffessional need to retrain or read a bit more half of them dont seem to have a clue. paed said 2nd didnt fit on spectum at home we live with asd every day and 2nd child has worse autism behaviours. doesnt quite add up. anyway have you thought about these assessment centres where they assess child all day at a centre and diagnose at end.needs nhs referal though. i know as parents you have the right to an nhs second opinion.

HI ALL, JUST WONDERING WETHER ANYONE ELSE HAS HAD DIFFICULTY GETTING CHILD NUMBER 2 DIAGNOSED. WE HAVE 3 CHILDREN ALL 3 SHOW ASPERGERS SYMPTOMS AND ADHD SYMPTOMS. MY MIDDLE SON HAS ALREADY BEEN IN PROCESS FOR 12 MONTHS AND IS TOTALLY FAILING IN SCHOOL.WHEN SOME PROFESSIONALS WENT INTO SCHOOL D WAS HAVING ONE OF HIS GOOD DAYS, TYPICAL. WE HAVE BEEN GOING TO THE CAHMS SERVICE FOR A YEAR NOW AND THEY THINK DAN HAS EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS. NO ONE CAN SEE DANS BEHAVIOUR IN FRONT OF THEM, NO EYE CONTACT, LINING UP OBJECTS ALL DAY, INFLEXIBLE ROUTINES,AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOUR AND HAND STIMMING AND FINGER FLICKING.LITTLE PLAY, WITHDRAWN, ISCOLATED, SPEECH IS ODD, RHYMING,GESTURING AND POINTING, UNABLE TO EXPRESS NEEDS AND UNABLE TO RELATE TO FEELINGS OF OTHERS, OBSESSIONS, NUMBER PATTURNS ETC. WE LIVE WITH AUTISM EVERY DAY AND KNOW THESE SYMPTOMS ARE SAME AS J OUR 6 YEAR OLD DIAGNOSED THOUGH HE NEVER HAND STIMMED OR LINED UP. I AM SO F*****OFF WITH PROFFESSIONALS I WE CAN SEE IT WHY CANT THEY. HE IS 5 1/2 NOW AND STRUGGLING. PEAD SAYS HASNT ENOUGH EVIDENCE YET. SCHOOL REPORT WAS APPALLING, A COMPLETE LIST OF AUTISM,ADHD SYMPTOMS SO THANK GOD SOMEONE NOW BACKS US UP. TO US D IS MORE DEEPLY AUTISTIC THAN J AS HE IS MORE WITHDRAWN AND UNHAPPY. ANYONE HAD ANY DIFFICULTIES GETTING SIBLINGS DIAGNOSED? EVEN AFTER THE MAYBE ITS COPIED BEHAVIOUR PHASE.

my two one diagnosed other in process have had many fears and phobias one is 6 one 5. hand dryers dogs lawn mowers water touching face big one at moment being alone as in toilet and bed shielas wheels advert makes j freak out hair clippers crowds,halls, nail clipping really bad about car washes the dark