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Hi, I'm writing about my little boy who is 9 and going through an absolutely dreadful time. Have posted before about our situation, in that we have moved to Kuwait with hub's work and to cut a long story short it's been a nightmare. We haven't managed to find a school for him that doesn't stress him out and we've tried home-schooling which isn't working either. We're now waiting to hear if we can get a transfer to another country. I know that this will bring it's own problems - more changes for him to cope with, however we can't stay here. Hubs can't return to UK due to tax implications until next April, however I may go back with my boys if we can't find good schooling elsewhere. Anyway - that's the background to our situation. Loads of change, rejections from schools here, huge drop in his self confidence, appearance of fixations he's never had before, lethargic and tired. That's the little boy I'm living with now - just dreadful. He is having huge melt-downs - out of control screaming and crying and cowering away as though we will physically harm him (which of course we never ever would). I 100% understand why he is having a terrible time as he has so much change to contend with. I'm hoping for some advice as to how deal with our main issues which are putting a massive strain on our family: 1. Most importantly - any tips on raising his self esteem. We tell him he's amazing and we love him but he's lacking in confidence and says he's 'stupid, mental, bad at maths, writing and english, a horrible son and brother'. Heartbreaking. 2. Meltdowns - even he has asked if I can help him to cope with his anger as it scares him. He is easily angered and becomes so distressed. We try to get him to 'cool down' in his room, however he sees it as a punishment and becomes more hysterical. 3. Fixations - obsessed with playing 'Minecraft' on ipad and laptop (and watching videos from youtube of other people playing!). Understand that it allows him to relax and unwind, however I can't accept that he chooses that over and above anything else. He used to love playing with diggers and now doesn't touch them, nor does he want to swim in the pool (we have sun!). He's allowed 1 hour per day and we use a timer so he understands that time is counting down. This doesn't stop the constant begging for more time, the lack of motivation to do anything else etc. The saddest thing is that most of the above was never apparent in the UK, it's obviously a result from the changes he has gone through. His diagnosis is for mild ASD and Dyspraxia. We've tried to manage the transitions as much as possible but quite frankly feel like we've done a bad job. He's just gone out on a bike ride with his dad this morning (used to adore this) and my husband rang to say he's hysterically crying and refusing to cycle. So frustrating - all we want is to have our happy boy back. Any tips or advice would be appreciated. Apologies for the long post. Emma x
Hello all, I am putting together an comprehensive, add free, website on all matters SEN. I have worked in the field for around 8 years; teaching, support and staff development. I would be interested to read any feedback you may have on the following topics: Autism: Asperger's Behavioural, Emotional and Social Difficulties (BESD) Any feedback gratefully received, Regards, Ben