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  1. Hello everyone, a bit of long one but please read on makes interesting reading. Our k is currently off school because of fear because/and of constant soiling. This has been proved by GOSH,and doctors letters saying our k is sore as he has difficultiy in wiping himself. The school according to headteacher is just out of special measures and we are currently in the process of going to tribunal date set January 30th. Now our k is refusing to go to school and his anxiety over work and his bowels and the way they manage him and their (school) lack of understanding all came to a head today. We want a change of school and we put this in tribunal back in july. We want the statement changed aswell and quite frankly the headteacher lost it with me today and screamed at me '(slammed down her pen and screamed how dare i say we are not meeting his needs as he has not been in school this past month) i of course was referring to before the summer as the school was not coping and they lied they were coping. She is furious that our k has not started back at school. They think that k and us are playing on his bowel situation and that we are making him anxious. This is exactly what she ACCUSED US OF and what she said WE CAN DO. she accused us of making him anxious and talking about his anxieties putting to much pressure on him failing to get him in on time and causing a bigger gap in his education (he is anxious in the mornings) not being firm with him. also she said that he is fine at school even though the school rang to say he is unwell and he faked it and we have evidence on cd to send to tribunal telling us he lied. She also said the following Her staff won't be dragging our k to school when he refuses. They will not come and pick him up. K is 10 this october. Its up to us to drag him in and its OK TO SMACK HIM AS ITS LEGAL SO LONG AS I DON'T USE AN IMPLEMENT. She refused to listen or watch the stuff on the disc. Our k is sore and has trouble wiping his bottom, he is angry they keep putting down a colour as he struggles with literacy and there is nothing in place to help him deal with sports day and parties and assemblies. They want to know in writing from professionals as to why he cannot be educated in school. According to someone i spoke with today, they said so long as we have asked for a change of school we are not seen to be refusing school and therefore should avoid prosecution. In the meantime what are we meant to do. K has been to the other school and likes it and i know its not about liking its about him feeling safe. The headteacher has verbally commented (i said i want this in writing) that should k have so much soil running down his leg she will personally change him even though she said that no staff are allowed to touch him. She then went on to say do you think we would really let him sit in soiled clothes. Yet he won't change his own clothes for PE. There seems no end to this. I want to complain that she screamed at me, there was no need for that at all, i told her i have trouble dragging him to school and she told me if i get him in everyday for two weeks he will be fine. CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS WOMAN. We had trouble getting him into the other school because of the dressing up issuses and school plays and school trips. We moved school so we could drag him to this school because its closer but we can't do it anymore. This has been like it for two years at this school and the previous school. This headteacher does not even say hello when i go to pick k up from school, she says hello to all other parents. They don't understand about trust, our trust and ks trust has been broken by this school and i can only tell them what he says on the quiet to me. They accused me not just the headteacher of making him anxious by putting ideas in his head, they asked does he say he is anxious to you or do you suggest things. He is anxious when it comes to anything with school trips, events. I can't believe this headteacher says i am putting him under too much pressure and that i can legally smack him. If i can complain and i so want to, reading others efforts the response has been 'they all heads and teachers stick together. Now this school has put in place separate toilets with individual locks that k can have a key to that the class teacher can have also the toilet is on the same floor as his classroom. This does not solve the issues around dressing up and events and parties, the SENCO said we can't stop having parties for the children, DID WE ASK THEM TO course not. well thats it, on my leaving i said whats going to happen on monday if he is refusing again, the headteacher said you will bring him in. I said hopefully, no she said you will bring him. If only they had told this to us before about the toilets and being refurbished i could have told k and felt more positive about him going back, they could have told us of the plans around toilets. K has got it in to his head that he is not going back. I cannot physically get him dressed he is ten almost in two weeks time, i asked the head you expect me to keep doing this she said yes and i said i am not willing to be kicked anymore. so now what ? anyone, can anyone help, many thanks sarni
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