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Found 7 results

  1. We've been researching this topic for some time. It's clear many ASpies would choose self-employment if they could; it also goes without saying that there are many areas of running a business that would be difficult; especially the social interaction, marketing, sales and PR. With two ASpies in the family, we've struggled alongside them to find and maintain meaningful employment. We've been stressed and frustrated by the lack of support available for people wanting to run their own businesses. As non-AS family members, we've had our own working lives restricted as we stagger work commitments with caring for our children. Our sons are enterprising, resilient and capable; It's the social barriers that let them down. Yes there are programmes in place training companies to be more AS-friendly, but just like in schools, the environment, the lighting, the noise and the people can't all be changed to help our ASpies. When it comes to self employment, the ASpies have to sell themselves, first, when trying to get help setting up their business, and again when trying to reach their market audience. So what if we take charge of things ourselves? Build a business network made up of ASpies who make and produce the goods, and non-ASpies who market, sell, and handle the customer-care side? Well we've gone ahead and done it! We've invested every penny of our own money; created the Social Enterprise, bought and furnished its first centre and set up business partnerships; now 4 Square Pegs is open for membership. We don't have all the answers: that's kind of the point. We wanted to create an enterprise where every member has their say and the business model is adapted to suit the members rather than trying to make them fit into a set programme of support. We will no doubt get critics, but the point is, at 4 Square Pegs we're DOING something to make a change. There's more going on at 4 Square Pegs than we can explain here, so come and find out what we're doing and how we're doing it at http://www.4squarepegs.co.uk Whether you join us as a member or support us as an investor, you'll be helping to change the futures of hundreds of ASpies in the UK and presenting supported self-employment as a viable option for work choices. 4 Square Pegs - we're making square holes!
  2. Asking for money has always been an issue with me - a big reason why I gave up self-employment. I've been hassled a lot at work in the last 2 years to assist my European counterparts, which means more travel away from my wife and kids. The sub-boss of Europe has asked to meet with me tomorrow. I know he'll be pushing for me to increase my travel range outside the UK and expects it to be inside my current job setup. My equivalents based in Europe take-home salary is roughly double mine, but I hate confrontation and know I'll ask followed by a diatribe of useless information including some important points put across in a factual manner that will come across as demanding and arrogant. How do I do this successfully? Any and all advice would be appreciated note: they do not know I have ASD.
  3. I am 36 years old, I have had problems socially for as long I can remember and depression and motivation problems. My parents took me to the GP who prescribed antidepressants when I was about 16 and I was sent to a psychiatrist who said I had social phobia. I was terrified about going to university and used alcohol to help social situations. I started using cannabis to relax and help me get to sleep. I had some friends and met my girlfriend there. I dropped out of my course as I was not interested in some of the modules and probably due to the alcohol and cannabis. I stopped the cannabis after about 5 years. I have had a few jobs but rapidly became bored with them and was sacked from my previous job for poor performance. I have stuck in jobs for a few years as I am worried whether the new job would be worse and find it very difficult getting to know new people. It took me a long time to adjust and it has been said to me that I hardly said anything for the first 6 months in a job. When I get to know people I try to be funny, but think I say inappropriate things sometimes and swear too much. A few years ago I was out of work and feeling very low and isolated after moving to a new area so saw a psychiatrist who said I had dysthymia (long term mild depression). I don't have any friends outside of work but get on OK with a couple of people at work. Some people at work say I am intelligent, but others think I am lazy and seem to be irritated by me. I am still on antidepressant tablets but am trying to reduce them. Recently I have become angry and feel bullied by my boss at work so I went to see a counsellor. I said I wanted to get to the bottom of why I have been on antidepressant tablets for so many years, and feel they have contributed to my weight gain and developing diabetes. I mentioned that I read about aspergers in an article and did the AQ test online and scored quite high (45/50). I was referred to a psychologist who said they couldn't give me an official diagnosis but would be better than an online test. They asked me about my background and history and then at the next appointment did the AQ test and the eyes emotion test. I scored in the normal range for the eyes test, but high for the AQ test. They said the results of the two tests were contradictory, but I have some aspects of aspergers that are causing problems. I am confused as it does not give me a clear answer and I don't know how reliable the AQ test is and was hoping for more in depth testing. I did some more reading online and found that there is some overlap with aspergers and ADHD and the difficulty concentrating and switching between things are things that I have problems with. I have lots of unfinished electronics projects at home and it is becoming full of bits and pieces. Trying to sort things out is becoming overwhelming. I spend hours on the internet each night, browsing the web and buying things on ebay. They offered to meet my boss to discuss. I really did not want this as I don't want them to know, as I feel they won't understand and I don't want special treatment or to be made fun of by work colleagues. Also I want to be certain before telling people. I wanted to understand for myself why I have problems and try to improve ways of dealing with things. I avoid doing things that make me uncomfortable, such as confrontational situations. I find myself getting more angry and frustrated as the blunting effect of the antidepressants is reducing, but have more energy to do things and feel closer to an explanation to some of the problems I have. I would appreciate some advice on whether the AQ test is adequate for diagnosis or whether it can give a false positive with other conditions such as ADHD, anxiety, depression, social phobia or personality disorder. Where should I go for a full diagnosis? Should I tell my boss? Thanks for reading.
  4. Warning this is a LONG POST In the past I have posted posts and started treads where I have spoken all about my views on people with various forms of Autism who 'show' their condition more than myself or some of my friends. This may have made me seem a little judgmental and unfair, but the truth is that I am far from those kind of things indeed. For example, I have a VERY close friend (we aren't together in case you were wondering, long story) who is not only a member of the transgender community but is also OS (Objectum Sexual, or at least I think that what it stands for) as he (for he was once a 'she' and a VERY macho one at that) is into robots, such as the Transformers and RoboCop and so will often use his toys (which he will often play with like a big kid) for sex for he has told me that OS people believe that objects have soul (an interesting concept in any case) and so thus he feels that when have he uses his toy of say Megatron, he is having sex with him. Otherwise my friend is perfectly verbal, can go out on his own, is streetwise, is VERY clean and tidy (more so than me), can fix computers and do repair work on robots (he once worked behind the scenes on 'Robot Wars' as a volunteer for his uncle worked on the house robots for the show) knows a number of kinds of marshal arts, among other things... I am not judgmental towards him one bit as I feel that he has 'proven' himself to be a good friend. Granted I (and my friend) find it difficult to cope with those who have much lower functioning ability than I have or those who engage in far more 'challenging behaviors' than myself (I used to hit people, but I have stopped now, I only bellow when I have a meltdown now) as I tend to 'judge' people by their actions or behaviors and thus I expect people to act 'good' all of the time, even when they don't feel like it. However my friend also knows his limits and so has long ago given up the idea of going to work or leaving the care company he is in, for he has a short fuse, is very strong, has no qualms about beating someone to a pulp, see's himself as something of a superhero and would most likely find himself in prison if he went to work and go involved in office politics. Anyway I digress so now onto the point of my discussion. My friend, although having a number of robot partners also has a boyfriend called Luke. Luke is in his 30s, has a number of degrees and works full time. However he still lives with his mum and dad, who have kept him at home as he has a lot of 'immature' or 'Autistic' behaviors, suchs as drinking out of coke bottles like a baby would, sticking his fingers in his ears when talking and also closing his eyes. On top of that he doesn't change his underwear and hangs around with a man called Tim, who he likes to go bus and train trips together. This would be fine save for the fact that when the bus is late Tim kicks off and calls the bus drivers (as in all of them not just the one driving the bus at the time) 'pedos' and runs away yelling 'bus drivers are pedos!' and sticking his fingers at them. Luke is in the habit of following Tim when he does this, in some of the roughest parts of Liverpool.... For a while me and my friend thought that it would be a good idea that Luke be allowed to leave home and live on his own. But when we last met him we also discovered that as well as being unwilling to change his ways he also is totally unable to defend himself as he does not know what to do if someone tried to attack him. Granted I'm not the greatest fighter in the world (I come from a middle class background) but even I know how to push a thug to the floor and then run away! Like on the other hand just let my friend take his phone when we tested him. Now we feel that he should not be allowed to go out on his own or go to work, as he is THAT vulnerable. This reminds me of a girl I once knew who was VERY naive, would over spend on her credit card and get herself into all kinds of situations where she'd have problems with her co-workers. If I had my way I'd have had her kept on the premises of the group home she was living in and only allowed out with staff, banned from contact with certain members of her family (she did not get on with them) and forbidden to go to work. This is not me being sexist or saying that people with ASDs should be forbidden from following their dreams, but rather in cases where the person is vulnerable enough more measures (than those which exist already) should be put in place to keep them safe.
  5. Hi. ' Any Aspie/ASC people into Architectural Visualisation, here? This is my special interest and it would be fascinating to discuss with others on the spectrum. I use 3ds Max, V-Ray, and Photoshop, along with some other programs. You?
  6. Hi, For the last few months I have been looking for part-time work to fit around an upcoming Uni course. I have taken the decision to tell any prospective employers that I have Asperger's Syndrome, because at my last job I didn't (because I hadn't been diagnosed then) and, long story short, I had to quit because of the stain the job put on me. I worked at a petrol filling station and, to be fair, the boss wasn't very good - but what also stressed me out was dealing with customers that I found difficult to read and understand as they often did silly, illogical things that often confused me. Right, that's enough context - what I am wondering is does anyone have an experience where they feel that they have been turned down for a job because of an ASD? I'm quite sure that my last boss wouldn't have employed me had she known I was autistic, as I think she wasn't intelligent enough to realise that it doesn't mean that you're a loony. I know that since the Equalities Act (2010) stipulated Asperger's Syndrome as an official disability that it is illegal for an employer to discriminate against someone with an ASD. However it can be covered up with excuses like "you're just not quite the candidate we're looking for" or what I seem to get: "the vacancy's been filled". It's hard enough that I struggle with Asperger's without bigoted middle managers scuppering my employment chances. Any shared experiences gratefully accepted. -Skaro7
  7. Hi, my daughter was diagnosed with AS several years ago. She is SO like me and reading up on the autism spectrum helped me make a lot of sense of the difficulties I have had in my life. I spoke to my GP who told me that if it helped me to use the label of AS to do so. He did not feel a formal diagnosis was necessary. I am now approaching my 50s and over the years of observing and copying people who coped in different environments, I feel I manage ok. However, I have recently run into a number of problems at work where I have been accused of acting inappropriately. People have misunderstood what I have said and now I feel alienated. My manager has taken me to task and I feel really unhappy and inadequate. I thought everyone at work was 'on the same side' because we are all working to a common goal. Another manager told me 'off the record' not to be so naive. He said that everyone has their own agenda. I don't understand the things that are going on around me and it's made me think that perhaps I am not as good as I thought at communicating and I don't understand 'mind games'. I don't know who I can talk to or who I can trust. I am wondering if I should have declared a disability before I started work, but then with no diagnosis and believing it would not affect my work I didn't say. I am in a position where I am expected to manage staff and I'm not sure I can do this now, but I don't want to lose my job as being incapable.
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