sons school

[citrine]

hiya *waves*

 

i wasnt sure where to put this, so apologys if incorrect.. i went to my sons parents evening tonight and i brought up a concern i have about his school books that he is bringing home.. he is flat refusing to bring story books as he says he dosnt like reading them and prefers information books..

 

she said that she didnt see this as a problem as information books are good.. i thought this would be a good oppatunity to bring up that he is waiting for assesments as the gp feels he may have asd/asp... the teacher imediatly jumped on that saying that they have/had autistic/apsegers children in school and my son isnt hard to settle and is too well behaved, the only thing he has problems with is that he interupts in class and chatters a bit too much...

 

i tried to tell her that she couldnt come to this assumption as children are different, and that my son thrives on the school enviroment as it is very structured and works on rigid times which he likes and feels safe with..

 

i felt incredibly stupid, and now i,m thinking maybe the doctor is wrong, but then again she dosnt have him at home.. althought he is a good boy, he is hard work with his ways...

 

is his teacher right?? or am i being an over emotional over sensitive mother...

[bramblebrae]

With all due respect to her teacher status it certainly give her no basis for deciding if someone is on the autistic spectrum. She can tell you what she sees but can't assume from this that he is not just because he dosen't behave like the kids she has experienced within a school environment. I wouldn't feel stupid you probably have a wider understanding of the broader aspects af ASD than she does as you have obviously spent time reading about it. Let the gp go ahead with his assessments and see what the trained professionals think though I do realise some people haven't had much luck with them either unfortunately but hopefully you'll get someone who can discuss properly with you your concerns.

On a slightly different note ...I do wish people would stop indicating that ASD means bad behaviour, once my son announced in the shoe shop to complete strangers he had ASD and one lady says no you can't, you seem far too well behaved to have that... I was rendered speechless as on one hand she was saying what she thought I wanted to hear probably and on the other she was insulting ever autistic person in the universe! I mean my son has had what on the surface looks like bad behaviour as a result of frustrations within environments he can't cope with and of course the usual 7yr old cheekiness I get but I'm pretty sure it's not listed on the diagnostic criteria for any ASD. My son dealt with his frustrations by lashing out at anything nearby adult kid objects it didn't really matter (still does but after some anger management learning has learnt to walk away quite often-really depends on the incident and the reactions of other people involved) other kids with different personalities deal with them differently and some bottle them up til they come home where they really do feel much safer.

 

hope you get some concrete answers though it's not nice in diagnosis limbo land but many on this board have been there before too and can give lots of advice and support so hang in there

 

take care

Lorraine

[mossgrove]

Teachers who know nothing about Autism but have a willingness to learn are often less of a problem than you might imagine.

 

Teachers who have dealt with maybe one or two children with Autism and expect that all other Autistic/Asoperger children will be the same as them can be a challenge.

 

You are definitely right to go ahead with the asessments.

 

Good luck!

 

Simon

[venus]

hi, would just like to add that my 5 and a half year old son has got autism, he is in mainstream school and the teachers say he is extremely well behaved, he has never ever been naughty- not in pre school ,nursery, or reception . He does everything that they ask him to do but when he comes home it is often a different story, people do not believe me when i say he completely different at home and i have given up trying to convince people differently.

[butterfingersbimbo]

my firend's aspie son is a model pupil at school....on the other hand.....there's my el.....go ahead with the assessments!

[rainbow queen]

well i had this trouble with the school my son was at ................

not at first may i add but as time went on................because my son was able to hold it all in and comply whilst at school.................

 

i still have no dx for my son because they are not willing to lay it down because he behaves so well in school...............

the min he walks through the gates though all hell breaks loose.

 

they have said yes he dose have sensory problems and processing of lang probs in a pressured environment...............ie....coming out of school is a major deal cause of all the noise and chatter and the fact hes had to deal with stuff all day .......he unleashes it onto me.....

 

they only agreed to that once they had seen video evidence of what out home life consists of...........

 

i know full well it isnt naughty behaviour because theres a rigid pattern to when the outbursts come and the things that trigger it.............i know it before it occurs now.............

 

i know it ...............its just getting others to know it that seems the big issuse.

 

i fell out with the headteacher /senco at the last school

i pulled my son out after having 2 years of patronising rubbish ....like all kids do that.....and well he seems alright here......

 

hes at a much better school now ...........who are more willing to listen and help.............

[darky]

my son dx asperger syndrome is the most passive kid in school. aims to please and wont say boo to a goose. i had to fight to get him dx as the school said he didnt present with any difficulties, boy were they wrong!!