Terrified of meeting

[curra]

I have a meeting today with the head and I'm dreading it. I know there will be other people too and if I'm too nervous they will just walk over me. What I fear most is that they might say that they are not the right school for my son because he can't cope with mainstream lessons. They have been hinting at this for some time.

Please keep fingers crossed for me

 

Curra

[Mookamoo]

Good luck

 

Write down anything you want to say - don't be afraid to look at notes.

 

If they think they can't cope thats their failing, not yours or your sons.

[oxgirl]

Very best of luck, Curra. Expect you've had the meeting by now, hope it went well and you felt listened to and you get the results you want for your lad. These meetings can be so intimidating, can't they.

 

Let us know how you got on. <'> <'>

 

~ Mel ~

[Clare63]

Thinking of you Curra, I hope the meeting went OK and that there is a positive outcome.

 

<'> <'> <'> <'> <'>

 

Clare x x x

[Karen A]

Hi Curra I hope the meeting was ok and worth the stress. <'> Karen.

[brooke]

Hope its all gone ok for you im not too keen on meetings either and i have one this week

<'>

[curra]

Thanks for replies and your good wishes! <'> <'> <'> I read your messages before going to the meeting and I received lots of encouragement from them - although I was really nervous before the meeting - Bach drops also helped a bit. The meeting lasted 2 hours! The head was with the senco and I went with an LEA officer. Thanks to your advices and a check list for meetings I got from the NAS, I prepared my points in writing and I just simply read them. There were many opinions and ideas said but I stuck to my view that my son has to take his GCSE in that subject and that he can't cope in the mainstream class so he's not learning according to his ability. The school tried to convince me that my son is doing fantastic at school (therefore it's all my exaggeration or my bad parenting! ) and that he has to go to maintream classes to learn to socialize. They obviously don't give much importance to his academic achievement, as in their view what he needs most is to fit in in society . (At what cost??? I felt like blowing up but I controlled myself) I said that he would eventually learn it and even if he never fits in completely the best way to help him is not to put pressure on him. I saw on their faces that they didn't agree with me. But the really good news is that the LEA officer supported my views! That was absolutely fantastic.! The conclusion was that the school agreed that he can learn in the unit until he feels he can return to the mainstream class. He may eventually have an online tutor, but that was just an idea said in the meeting so I'm not holding my breath. The main thing is that M is feeling more relaxed now. for a change - bless him! The head didn't look very happy though at the end of the meeting, which is a pity because there has been good communication so far between the school and me .

 

Today I feel relieved and optimistic, thanks to all of you !! <'> <'>

 

Curra

[Karen A]

Sounds to me like you did a very good job.Karen.

[DaisyProudfoot]

Well done Curra - sounds successful

[Clare63]

You did it Curra, well done for sticking to your guns, its hard I know only too well and they always seem so quick to blame others ie us the parents !!!

 

Clare x x x

[Nic m]

Fantastic news

 

Nicola

[curra]

Thanks, Guys!! <'> <'> I have to say again what a great and supportive place this is. Without this forum I would've broken into little pieces a long time ago. The success is only until Xmas when there'll be another meeting to see how to move forward next year but it gives M 2 months of relief and we're already seeing a very positive change in him. I feel lucky to have the LEA on my side at least for now, I suppose it's more convenient for them to put pressure on the school than to have me fighting them !

Curra

[oxgirl]

Great job, Curra, you did really well. Well done for not letting these people intimidate you.

Hope things go smoothly from now on. <'>

 

~ Mel ~

[jlp]

Well done - it's very hard to make your point when you're conscious of trying to stay on good terms with the school. Great news that the LEA were on your side.

 

There seems to be such a huge gap educationally for high functioning / AS and it really worries me for the future.

[curra]

Thanks, Mel, the stress of the meeting caused me heartburn and palpitations the next day, but it had a positive outcome, and that's the main thing!

 

Jlp, high functioning AS kids are not getting the support they need. M's school is back to playing dirty tricks to prove their point, by telling him that he'll get a D in his GCSE if he doesn't go to the mainstream class, so the pressure continues! They are trying to discourage him and they ###### know that he can get discouraged very easily! They call that support!. I'm starting to think that the school can't imagine that an autistic boy can get good GCSE grades.

 

Curra xx