Can't believe what has just happened...

[Clare63]

Following my horrific day yesterday, I made the decision that I can't sit around waiting for things to change, my DS has a life and only one shot at childhood and I am not sitting back and letting other people ruin it.

 

After another sleepless night and a young man all stressed and depressed about his life,

*I left him to sleep,

*phoned school and told them I would be taking him to the Doctors,

*made the appointment

*then typed a list of all the things I wanted to say and that I wanted to ask for our GP's support once the statement process gets going

* Phoned Partnership with Parents for advice about what to do re statements etc, fantastic lady there who gave me lots of advice and support

*Went to the appointment and.....

 

I never realised how great our Doctor is, he was soooo supportive and understanding, he told me how angry he is at the education system regarding children with ASD's and said he'd do all he could to help us. He said that DS was clearly suffering and promptly signed him off school until further notice, as the child is at breaking point and so are we as a family !!!!!

 

Phoned PWP back they said great that will help with statement and said that the school should provide work for him to do at home.

 

Just got to ring school now and I feel scared, they always fob me off and are bound to make me feel I have failed as their attitude seems to be to keep pushing him.

 

Funny I got mixed emotions, yes this is a good thing, give us a break and chance to get things sorted but at the same time I feel sad and let down by the system.

 

Well just wanted to share all that with you, thanks as ever for your support and kindness, I hope I don't become too needy as I step into the next stage of statements and special schools.

 

 

<'> <'> <'> <'> <'>

 

Clare x x x

[sesley]

Well good for you for not taking anymore ###### and seeking help from a supportive Doctor,this is the best forum to share your frustrations with, because we all know how challenging life with a ASD person is, more than any doctor or teacher can possibly know.

[mossgrove]

Our GP was wonderful too. Even if you decide that a return to mainstream is the best thing to do eventually you have the breathing space to make a decsion.

 

We found we reached a point with the school where we no longer wanted to keep things friendly with them, so maybe it's time to make it clear to them your son is at home because they have failed to support him, not because you have failed as a parent.

 

Simon

[Flora]

clare <'>

 

You've done absolutely the right thing.

 

Your son should receive home tuition provided by the LEA after 15 days.

 

Hope you don't mind me saying this; don't wait for the school or anyone else to apply for stat assessment. You can apply yourself, the IPSEA website (find it in jargon buster) has template letters for the wording. the sooner you get the ball rolling the better though because it takes a long time.

 

You are doing the right thing. Sounds like you have a really supportive GP too which will help.

 

We here on in the same boat; Bill was signed off indefinitely last March and hasn't been back, and as far as I'm concerned he isn't going back into mainstream. It's a long process, but hopefully with support from all the professionals you will find the right school for your son.

 

take care,

 

Flora XX

[brooke]

<'> <'> You have done the best thing <'> <'>

[bid]

Exactly the same thing happened to us with DS...fantastic GP (who actually has a DD with Dyspraxia) was absolutely appalled at his state, signed him off and started the ball rolling that finally got him a Statement and a residesi school.

 

Well done and good luck <'>

 

Bid

[hev]

oh what a brilliant gp,can you clone him please and send him to my surgery?!!really pleased he was so supportive <'>

[DaisyProudfoot]

<'> >< <'> Good news. Our GP was excellent too, from going to him Martin had his dx in just months despite what the school said.

[Karen A]

Hi I am really pleased the GP was helpful.As Flora said the LEA should arrange alternative provision for children with medical needs-which includes your child if they are signed off for more than 15 consecutive days by the GP.Keep an eye on time scales and contact the LEA in 10 days or so if it looks like they will need to arrange provision.Karen.

[farfalla]

Now put your feet up......... well done you big hugs

[barefoot wend]

Clare

 

Really good news. Wishing you both well.

 

Barefoot

[annie]

Well done Clare, I agree you've done the right thing. What a great GP you have

 

Annie

xx

[dooday24]

<'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'>

love donnaxxxxxxx

[summertime]

Totally agree with what everyone has said, you've done the right thing, hope it all goes well from here <'>

[Clare63]

Thank you sooooo much everyone, I can't begin to tell you all how much I appreciate each and everyone of you (bit gushing I know but feeling all emotional at the mo, but I do mean it)

 

Think this was the break we needed, I feel so empowered and that I can now focus on doing the right thing for my lad.

 

Finally plucked up courage to speak to the school who seemed quite shocked and defensive saying they did not think it was the right thing for him being away from school and that the child will think he's won !!!!!! Won what ?? a bleedin chance to have a life ! they also said it would be beter if we applied for the statement rather than them ? so that's exactly what I shall be doing.

 

Thanks again everyone, you've given me some much needed strength to battle on.

 

<'> <'> <'> <'> <'> Hugs all round everyone, on me. x x x

 

Clare x x x

[Kathryn]

Good luck with the next stage, Clare. <'>

 

K x

[KarenT]

Great news that your GP has been so supportive. But isn't it a shame that it falls down to luck in the end?

 

Karen

x

[Karen A]

<'> <'> I hope you both have a good day today and can chill out a little.Karen.

[curra]

Clare, Well done! My GP was also fantastic.

 

Good luck with the statement. If you need help, there's lots of information and support on the forum

 

<'> <'>

Curra

[JsMum]

Hi claire so sorry it has taken this to get someone to actually really see and understand that your son isnt coping in a mainstream school, now you have a very broken child they might actually do something, why do they wait until they have a breakdown before they act?

 

We are in the same boat as you but our LEA have no home tutors, no unit, no other resouce because there is so many children like ours in the same situation and not enough resources, J managed a few hours yesterday after a series of events, today he hasnt managed at all, it took all morning just to get him out of bed, eat his breakfast and dress, now he is banging a football in his bedroom running in and out and bouncing on the trampoline.

 

Tomorrow we try again, its a nightmare, full of stress and tears, no one seems to care in the goverment, they really need to look at what mainstream poses for children who have special needs and can not cope in the enviroment that triggers the discomfort our children face everyday.

 

Js sick note runs out in 2 weeks time, but I really dont know what more help it can be if it is just extended, we could go on like this for months before anything is sorted and I might be in the funny farm by then with pure mental instatbility as its driving me crazy.

 

I really do feel for you, no matter what path we chooses its hard what ever we do, off school he is over excited and bored, at school he feels stressed and uncomfortable and leads to further outbursts in the evening that lead to late bedtimes, exhausted and destressed.

 

We simply can not win in an education system as it is, your son hasnt won by been signed off by a GP, your son has had a mental breakdown, if adults had one they would be signed off work, so she is just rediculous, what would get her to listen that this lad is not coping, he has not won here at all.

Basically no one wins in these situations.

 

Its a hard road ahead now to ensure that your son gets his needs met in an enviroment suited to his difficulties.

 

We travel together, like so many other mums out there.

 

JsMum

[Clare63]

Thank you kathryn, Karen T, Karen A, Curra & JSmum,

 

For your kind words of support, Js mum you totally seemed to sum it all up and my heart goes out to you for your situation, I guess in a year or so your son will be expected to start secondary education, its not just that what our children experience but how too it effects us as parents its so hard when all we want is the best for our kids and that they are given a chance.

 

<'> <'> <'>

 

Clare x x x

[Nic m]

Clare, i have enjoyed reading this thread if that makes sense, my GP has always been great and it is so nice to hear so many saying the same.

Good luck with the next stage.

Nicola

[Clare63]

Thanks Nic,

 

Its sooooooo encouraging isn't it.

 

Clare x x x

[Nic m]

Yep, my GP is great.

Nic