Parents evening

[Sallya]

...Just met with my little girls teacher this evening, and I wondered if I could have a few thoughts on what she said about my daughter who has ADHD and social communication difficulties....

 

she is very hard work

 

she is very bright, very fluent reader, excellant at maths and should be in the top maths group, but due to her inability to concentrate, focus on her work sit still or work independantly, is in the second group, where she has a 1-2-1 and is doing well

 

doesn't really think she has ADHD, but teach doesn't know much about it and thinks that daughter is just seeking attention because sometimes she does behave well

 

she is very demanding

 

she constantly interrupts and cannot wait her turn

 

she fidgets and makes noises in class

 

lots more, but I can't remember it all, I was thinking of getting a description of ADHD for the teacher but I can't really find what I'm looking for

 

do you think that children with ADHD seek attention??!!

[Nic m]

Hi Sallya

i am sur if you put this into a search engine you would get what you are looking for, sorry i am not great on the computer but i am sure someone will come along soon to help.

If you have a diagnosis why would the teacher say this?

Think you may have a bit of explaining to do with the teacher, good luck.

Nicola.

[Sallya]

Nicola, thanks....I've printed something from the ADDISS website, but it doesn't quite strike the note I'm looking for....I've also done a search on ADHD in girls(....and found out there are several different types of ADHD, and she fits 'chatty cathy!')

 

After I had the meeting, I felt so fed up, I went to M&S for a large coffee, then came home and spent most of the evening hunting the web for something to explain to the teacher. It took a long time to settle off to sleep as well, and I've remembered some of the other things she said

 

 

she thinks she chooses her behaviour

 

she is jerky,and clumsy in her movements and finds written work difficult....I asked if occupational therapy would help and asked if the school would refer her, which teach going to see about

 

she has been sent out of the classroom several times to go to the deputy head, and at that point she knows she has overstepped the boundary, and is horrified with herself

 

 

teach thinks that if she ignores her and doesn't get the attention she is craving, then the bad behaviour will stop

 

and she has 23 otherchildren in her class to teach as well and she's not putting up with it

 

it must be very hard to have her in her class, I don't envy any teacher who has to have her to teach..I'd like to find something which will explain things better and help the teacher understand

[annie]

Hi Sallya ,

 

There's an information sheet that you can download from Here. The sheet also gives some tips for supporting children in the classroom.

 

Hope this helps.

 

Annie

xx

[Tally]

she has 23 other children in her class to teach as well and she's not putting up with it

Not a very nice way of putting it . . . but this is why your daughter needs 1:1 support - let someone trained in it deal with it so that the teacher can get on with her job of teaching. Teachers do lack training with special needs, so anything you can offer could be helpful to her. And they do not have the time to offer the 1:1 time your daughter obviously needs.

 

teach thinks that if she ignores her and doesn't get the attention she is craving, then the bad behaviour will stop

If the behaviour is down to attention seeking, this is a reasonable assumption. But with a combination of ADHD and Social Communication difficulties, is she even aware that the behaviour is inappropriate? Is she able to pick up on the social cue that the teacher is not responding to her, so she should stop whatever she is doing?

 

Clearly the teacher is not in a position to refute your daughter's diagnosis, but she still disbelieves it anyway. If you can find information to show that your daughter's behaviours are symptoms of ADHD (or perhaps atypical ADHD), she may be more willing to work with you and believe what you're saying.

[Karen A]

Hi Sallya.Ben has a Dx of DCD with Social Communication Difficulties.He is also very bright.I don't know enough about ADHD to decide how much of what the teacher is talking about is ADHD related.However the demands for teacher attention and interuptions ,getting into trouble and being upsett about it-sounds very like Ben.I relate these difficulties to ''Social Communication Difficulties ''.If a child does not undersand the social rules in class and sees things differently and they do not have guidance -specific help to learn the social rules- then they will create difficulties for the teacher.For example if they know the answer to a question then they shout it out.If the child is bright as well they may well be a challenge to teach because they know the answer to lots of questions

 

The idea that if the behaviour is ignored it will stop is true for cases where the behaviour is the attention seeking that teachers usually see.However it is more complicated for chidren with Social Communication Difficulties-they do not learn to stop by being ignored.Indeed they may become confused and challenging.

Strategies that help include specific support for learning Social Behaviour in a structured way,a time out card so that the child can take a breather before they get in trouble and a support from people who understand the behaviour and are supportive but firm.

There are some good books around for teachers on supporting children with Asperger Syndrome.If you have a look you may well find lots of relevant ideas.

Ben also has support from an Autism Outreach teacher who has provided inset for all school staff.Now that staff are aware of how to support him appropriately we have much fewer complaints about his behaviour.I know that different areas have different rules-some LEA's will only provide outreach support for children that have an ASD Dx -but it is worth investigating.

 

The TA providing support should be aware of your child's Social Communication Difficulties and have an IEP which includes an agreed plan for dealing with interuptions in class,frustration etc.If the teacher is having difficulties it is worth investigating how the support is being used.It may be that the teacher lacks understanding. However if your DD has 1:1 support for a significant amount of lesson time funded or detailed in a statement and is still a challenge in class I wonder whether she is actually getting the support she should be.I may be wrong but it is woth investigating.

 

 

 

The other thing that I thought about was the fact that your child is in the second group in maths.If that is the appropriate group then it is fine.However if they have the ability to be in the top group and have 1:1 support then they should not be in a lower group due to an inability to concentrate.

If your child is being presented with work that is not challenging enough they may not concentrate because they are bored.

 

Coordination difficulties often occur in children who have Social Communication Difficulties.It is certainly worth pushing for an OT assesment.

If your child has coordination difficulties then support should be provided in school to enable them to produce work at a level that they are capable of.

If your DS is having difficulties with producing work that they are capable of then that may also contribute to difficulties with behaviour.

The OT may also be able to provide an OT programme to help with clumsy movements.

Karen.

[cmuir]

I think teachers can get above their station. They're teachers not specialists in ADHD and the like, and occasionally they need to be reminded! I'm not at all convinced ASD kids behave the way the do for attention. In fact, I know when my sons 'kicks off' he obviously attracts attention, but it's quite the opposite - he doesn't want attention. Not always the case of course, but I do wish teachers wouldn't make these comments without firstly being knowledgeable about such conditions.

 

The things that the teacher mentioned are traits which one would associate with ADHD ie poor concentration, fidgeting, etc.

 

Best wishes.

 

Caroline.

[Mr.T]

I have a Son who has Aspergers Syndrome and High functioning Autism and ADHD from what you describe it could be anyone of the Above You can have Aspergers syndrome and have Aspergers syndrome or one of the other ASD Disorders There is a very fine line between them some overlap it is difficult

my son was very fidgety he also could not focus for too long his short term memory was impaired he was singled out by normal children as different he would try and get attention but not intentially he worked better on his own and when he was in a classroom scenario his work deteriated dont know if any of this is helpful,

best wishes

Tom

[Karen A]

Hi Tom.I notice you have just joined us and this is your first post so welcome to the forum.Karen.

[Bard]

I think teachers can get above their station. They're teachers not specialists in ADHD and the like, and occasionally they need to be reminded!

 

Ouch!

Parents need reminding of this too, when they get irritated that we are not all full of in depth knowledge about the variety of children that we get in classes. So next time we don't spot, know, instantly understand, give us a break!

Back to the original post; here's some stuff from one of the 24 sheets in my SEN file on various issues, from ADHD to Fragile X. This is my initial check list when I'm trying to work out what's going on with a child.

Is it ADHD?

Key ADHD symptoms:

Difficulty in following instructions and completing tasks

Difficulty in sticking with an activity

Easily distracted and forgetful

Often doesn't listen when spoken to

Fidgets, is restless and can't sit still

Interfers with other children's games, activities or work

Can't stop talking and interrupts others

Runs around at inappropriate times (as well as appropriate!)

Blurts out answers without waiting to be asked

Has difficulty in waiting or taking turns, eg in games.

Acting impulsively, without thinking of the consequences.

 

Hope it's helpful for your child's teacher.

[paulathomson]

Ouch!

Parents need reminding of this too, when they get irritated that we are not all full of in depth knowledge about the variety of children that we get in classes. So next time we don't spot, know, instantly understand, give us a break!

Back to the original post;

 

 

i thought that in the original post the lady has a dx for her child and has informed teacher of dx.. but teacher is disputing it...i think this is the source of most parents irritation rather than teachers lack of awareness...

 

i have had similar problems at school with one teacher who refused to accept my childs dx..and i was very irritated indeed..

[Sallya]

....Thankyou every one.....I took the things in to her this morning, and she asked how I felt about what she had said the night before...I said that I understand how difficult it must be to have daughter in her classs, and that I know that she is hard work and I know that she can be extremely manipulative, and there is a healthy amount of ignoring her going on at home, but she has been properly diagnosed by a paediatrian,

with the connors rating scale and the Austrailian scale for Aspergers, and it was a lengthy process before they reached the conclusions they did, andshe wasn't diagnosed in 5 minutes by any means, and that I hoped that these would help her understand what ADHD was all about and I appreciated all her hard work with daughter and we are going to meet up again after the weekend when she has had a chance to read everything...she has had chidren with ADHD in her class before, but they were boys, andI think that girls present differently and I don't blame her at all for struggling to beleive her dx, daughter is a very complex little girl and there have been times when I have struggled to know what is going on with her, so I don't expect a teacher who has had her in her class for few weeks to understand everything about her just like that....getting to know her properly will take a bit of time...having said all that, I did feel she was a little harsh and yesterday I was in bits, so sorry for not getting back to this thread a little sooner...your thoughts are all appreciated

 

s

 

xxx

[Bard]

Sorry, everyone, I got the wrong end of the stick. Comes of reading too quickly and being in a hurry!

Sallya, the teacher is very fortunate that you are so calm and patient. It sounds as if you are going to end up with a real working relationship with her that can only result in benefitting your daughter.

especialy if she's willing to read up and research at the weekend.

One of the main issues that I have trouble with is the response of some parents of NT children who continuously complain about any other child that they feel is being detrimental in any way to their child's education and happiness. Sometimes the things that they bring up as major issues are frankly the sort of thing that a six year old would complain about. Having an ADHD child in your class can mean that you end up listening to a lot of winging from them.

Good luck Salya, and I think you've made a terrific start.