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Minx

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Hi

 

My son Adam who is 7 and has ASD is having problems in the playground. He has no supervision at lunchtime and today I walked past the school at lunchtime and he was standing alone starring into space. I am not sure whether this is happening everyday.

 

Anyone else having problems. He is in a mainstream school and the school do not seem to want to address this.

 

 

 

Mandy

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Oh, Mandy, this is so distressing to see, isn' t it. >:D<<'> I remember when My lad was at primary school it used to break my heart to see this. In fact, he used to choose to be alone, though. They used to allow him to take little toys in and he would spend his break and lunchtimes walking around the lines painted on the playground and making little noises with his toys. If children came over to see him or to ask him what he was doing he used to tell them to go away! I think it was his way of chilling out and getting some space to himself away from the hustle of the other children, it was all too much for him. He never understood the other childrens' games, couldn't and didn't want to join in with them and so withdrew into himself, where it was safe.

 

Has your lad said anything about playtimes to you? Do you know if he wants to be part of the games? Some children are desperate to join in and find it difficult and need help, but I believe my lad needed to just be left alone for a while to recharge his batteries.

 

Does he have any friends at school and, if not, could you talk to the teacher to try and get some friendships encouraged and to encourage the children to include your lad in their games if he wants to join in.

 

Good luck. >:D<<'>

 

~ Mel ~

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Hi Minx

My DD recently started a new school and has had a dreadful time trying to settle in. Both school and I have tried to encourage and support DD with no luck and she kept saying she had no friends etc. However, when I picked her up from school yesterday she said that one girl had asked if she wanted to join group play and she declined.

Today on the way to school she voiced that she prefers time to herself as it helps to calm her so I think you will probably find that sometimes they will want to play but can't and other times they just don't want contact with other children.

I know how heartbreaking as a parent it is to watch our children being left out and I found it heartbreaking at the school disco to watch DD being ignored. Thankfully she just wanted to do her own thing anyway prefering to watch the lights and spin around to care what the other children thought of her.

I have tried role play too which has helped DD to make new friendships with me acting as DD and DD pretending to be another child and discussed appropriate behaviours and "Why do you think he/she was upset, happy etc." It has been really useful in lots of situations. Hope this helps a little >:D<<'>

Helen

Edited by morgan and alexandra

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My son found playtimes very difficult from year1 -- he was always in trouble, crying, "fighting", etc because he just didnt know what to do in the unstructured situation. Fortunatley the SENCO recognised the problems that a number of children were having, and the school introduced lunchtime activities. So now the children can choose either to go outside, play football, or free play as they choose, OR they can do something inside such as watch a video, colouring, origami, knitting, board games, computer, or just read in the library. These activities vary day to day but on a timetable, and are supervised by a TA.

 

He has found this really helpful as the activities arent stressful or pressured but recognise that not all children are comfortable running round outside. Sometimes he does choose to go out. There are also a lot of "quiet areas" outside where he sometimes persuades a group to go and look through pokemon cards or dinosaur pictures.

 

They also have playground buddies - children that are trained to organise group games and include other children.

 

I know its a case of resources and staff being willing to do it, but maybe you could suggest something similar, as I'm sure its not just ASD children who can benefit

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.........the school introduced lunchtime activities. So now the children can choose either to go outside, play football, or free play as they choose, OR they can do something inside such as watch a video, colouring, origami, knitting, board games, computer, or just read in the library. These activities vary day to day but on a timetable, and are supervised by a TA.

 

I've never heard of this, it sounds wonderful. Usually schools tend to chuck the children outside and let them get on with it. I wish my son's primary school had been so insightful, he would have been a lot more comfortable during break times staying inside and playing quietly. :notworthy::thumbs:

 

~ Mel ~

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Hi Mandy.Ben found playtime very difficult when he was about the same age as Adam.He is much more settled now.

The ASD outreach teacher provided traning for all of the school staff so that they could understand Ben and provide support at unstructured times.Ben's class teacher is very keen to increase awareness of the things he is interested in...such as ICT and Harry Potter...so he has been able to develop social skills around his interests.

The school also provide activities at lunch time including games club and ICT club.

If Adam has any TA support then one option worth considering would be to push for the support to be used for unstructured times such as lunch time.

If support is currently not provided or is insufficient to cover lunch and play times then you could ask for a review.

Schools have a duty to enable children with SEN to access the whole curriculum...including unstructured periods of the school day.Karen.

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Oh, Mandy, this is so distressing to see, isn' t it. >:D<<'> I remember when My lad was at primary school it used to break my heart to see this. In fact, he used to choose to be alone, though. They used to allow him to take little toys in and he would spend his break and lunchtimes walking around the lines painted on the playground and making little noises with his toys. If children came over to see him or to ask him what he was doing he used to tell them to go away! I think it was his way of chilling out and getting some space to himself away from the hustle of the other children, it was all too much for him. He never understood the other childrens' games, couldn't and didn't want to join in with them and so withdrew into himself, where it was safe.

 

Has your lad said anything about playtimes to you? Do you know if he wants to be part of the games? Some children are desperate to join in and find it difficult and need help, but I believe my lad needed to just be left alone for a while to recharge his batteries.

 

Does he have any friends at school and, if not, could you talk to the teacher to try and get some friendships encouraged and to encourage the children to include your lad in their games if he wants to join in.

 

Good luck. >:D<<'>

 

~ Mel ~

Hi

 

Yes he would like to be part of games, but he has trouble understanding the games and his reactions are not quick enough. Then yesterday he said children are calling him names. He does have friends at school but I think he is choosing the wrong children to play with. I have spoke to his TA support today and she is going to keep an eye on it.

 

Mandy

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Hi Minx

My DD recently started a new school and has had a dreadful time trying to settle in. Both school and I have tried to encourage and support DD with no luck and she kept saying she had no friends etc. However, when I picked her up from school yesterday she said that one girl had asked if she wanted to join group play and she declined.

Today on the way to school she voiced that she prefers time to herself as it helps to calm her so I think you will probably find that sometimes they will want to play but can't and other times they just don't want contact with other children.

I know how heartbreaking as a parent it is to watch our children being left out and I found it heartbreaking at the school disco to watch DD being ignored. Thankfully she just wanted to do her own thing anyway prefering to watch the lights and spin around to care what the other children thought of her.

I have tried role play too which has helped DD to make new friendships with me acting as DD and DD pretending to be another child and discussed appropriate behaviours and "Why do you think he/she was upset, happy etc." It has been really useful in lots of situations. Hope this helps a little >:D<<'>

Helen

Thanks Helen

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My son found playtimes very difficult from year1 -- he was always in trouble, crying, "fighting", etc because he just didnt know what to do in the unstructured situation. Fortunatley the SENCO recognised the problems that a number of children were having, and the school introduced lunchtime activities. So now the children can choose either to go outside, play football, or free play as they choose, OR they can do something inside such as watch a video, colouring, origami, knitting, board games, computer, or just read in the library. These activities vary day to day but on a timetable, and are supervised by a TA.

 

He has found this really helpful as the activities arent stressful or pressured but recognise that not all children are comfortable running round outside. Sometimes he does choose to go out. There are also a lot of "quiet areas" outside where he sometimes persuades a group to go and look through pokemon cards or dinosaur pictures.

 

They also have playground buddies - children that are trained to organise group games and include other children.

 

I know its a case of resources and staff being willing to do it, but maybe you could suggest something similar, as I'm sure its not just ASD children who can benefit

Hi

 

They offer nothing at Adam's school, but they have suggested observing, but they never want to address dinner time.

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Hi Mandy.Ben found playtime very difficult when he was about the same age as Adam.He is much more settled now.

The ASD outreach teacher provided traning for all of the school staff so that they could understand Ben and provide support at unstructured times.Ben's class teacher is very keen to increase awareness of the things he is interested in...such as ICT and Harry Potter...so he has been able to develop social skills around his interests.

The school also provide activities at lunch time including games club and ICT club.

If Adam has any TA support then one option worth considering would be to push for the support to be used for unstructured times such as lunch time.

If support is currently not provided or is insufficient to cover lunch and play times then you could ask for a review.

Schools have a duty to enable children with SEN to access the whole curriculum...including unstructured periods of the school day.Karen.

 

Hi

 

Thanks for the advice. Adam has lunchtime cover on his statement but the school already provide more hours that he is entitiled to so I do not feel I could ask for lunchtime cover or they will take it off him later in the day.

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If its in his statement that he has specified lunch time cover then this should be happening, if not then they are not abiding by his SEN and could be liable for not following throw his statement.

 

Unstructured times are very difficult for children with ASD/ADHD as there is more vulnerability to their difficulties, dinnertimes will include many areas where you child will struggle, rules of games, interaction, social conduct, behavioural expectations.

 

Playtimes are vital for J, if you take away his playtimes his classroom enviroment becomes harder for him to tolerate esculating his behaviour, which in turn could warrent him another banned playtime, J was in a constant visious circle like this for over 2 years in his previous school becuase they didnt understand his difficulties, just kept on punishing him things that where beyound his control, looking back it was discrimination and cruelty.

 

NAS do a booklet on dinnertimes, playtimes and classroom management, request these as they are very good and teacher friendly.

 

Write a letter to your senco reminding them of the statement and explain in a friendly manner that though they are provided more hours during classroom and learning they are not meeting his needs at lunch time, maybe a review of his statement needs arranging to try and increase his statement hours.

 

JsMum

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