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sharron

help needed re daughter

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Hello I have not been on here for a long time

i am having trouble with my 7 year old daughter she is wishing that she was dead she hates her life and she keeps wanting to runaway from home and i don't know what to do with her.

My son is 11 has asd and is non verbal he keeps invading her private space which sets her of and really upsets her, i feel like i am stuck in the middle with the 2 of them, trying to do my best but it is frightening me how my dd is going of.

My husband is no use as all he does is shout at both of them and wind them up all the more it feels like i have 3 kids.

is there any advice you can give me thank you.

 

sorry for ranting.

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Hi Sharron.I think it can be tough having a sibbling with ASD it makes relationships much more complicated.Perhaps now your DD is 7 she is becoming more aware that her brother is different and that he can be annoying.In my area there is a support and activity group for siblings of children with ASD.It may be worth finding out whether there is a similar group in your area.

Another option may be to ask your GP to refer your DD to Camhs.Camhs should offer an assessment appointment if your DD is expressing a wish that she was dead and she wants to run away especially since your daughter is only 7. >:D<<'> >:D<<'> Karen.

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Thank you karen, we was under camhs for a year but things were going well so she closed our file i will have to get in contact with them again and she if we can sort something out, I am also seeing my sons paediatrician on monday so hopefully he might be able to help.

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Sharron,

Hope you find some support for your daughter, a friend of mine whose son has as, discovered her NT daughter was self harming camhs were very supportive to them as a family and helped their daughter come to terms with having a brother on the spectrum

 

Clare x x x

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My daughter is now 16 and her as brother is 14 but when they were younger my daughter also wished she didnt live at home and that it was her brother that was dead not her..........She wasembaressed by him,hated the fact that he interfeared and spoiled outings and she couldnt have many freinds over as he would kick of and hound them.........

 

Its hard at the time but it does get easier as they get older and like my daughter has done relaises hes just how he is ................plus she can get out and about more now doing her own thing..........

 

When she was younger i contacted an organizetion called Young Carers..............its run by the carers association most towns ect have one and they take kids who have siblings or parents with special needs and disabilites out and about.its kinda like a youth group but everyone there is the brother or sister of someone with any kind of disability...............its all free and my daughter was even collected from hom e and brought back..............it gave her some time away from home once a week for a few houres doing fun stuff.theyd go on trips and alsorts.............maybe worth looking into.

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She sounds alot like my daughter and what she is going through at the moment, she loves her brother so much but sometimes it just gets on top of her as he is very needy of her and always invades her space and she needs to be a child too. At present she goes through stages of wishing he was dead to she was dead, for a few days she is staying at grandma's as it's too much for her but at least I know she will have a lovely time there.

 

We invite her friends over when he goes out for respite and she attends a after school club so she has some of her own time away from him-this does give her some respite away from him, but sometimes she gets upset as she would rather be at home with me. Are there any activities you could get set up for her that she could attend i.e. holiday clubs etc, maybe ask s/s to do a carers assessment of hers and your needs so that either she can get some respite from her brother or you could get some respite from your son so you both have some 1-1 time together.

 

I would try and give NAS autism helpline a call and ask them to send you through any info of activities that he may be able to go to or that she can as it sounds like she does need some space, which I think most siblings of special needs do.

 

Good lcuk also contact CAHMS agian they will be able to offer suggestions, take care

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Thank you, my son does get 2 nights a month respite care which is fantastic and we can spend quality time with daughter, my son also stays to after school club once a week untill 5.30, so she has her friends around that night to play. she also does karate 2 nights a week and swimming so she does not miss out in some ways, it is just the qualty time just with the 2 of us.

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