im getting desperate

[leasam]

my son (9) wont eat. everyday he comes home from school with his packed lunch uneaten, he then says he's hungry so will have some toast, then at 6.30 when he has his dinner its horrible and cant eat it, i can see he's going to end up ill at this rate. i ask him what he would like to eat but when i give it him he cant eat it. i feel like im going to crack up, he cant see the point in eating, im not even sure that he knows when he's hungry, some dasy he can just eat and eat and eat others nothing......, can someone please give me some suggestions or something, im sooo desperate

[shell]

my steven only used to eat pasta and cheese it's all he ate for 6 months my GP said that was fine as long as he was drinking. he still wont eat mashed potatoe says it feels nasty in his mouth.

also they do a milkshake like slim fast only it isn't for loosing waight but to help maintaine it you could ask you GP about them

[mbrown]

Hi Leasam, I'm really sorry to hear about your son's eating problem. Does he drink? If so , would it be possible to get those liquid meals that people with digestive problems receive from their GP?

 

But you say that somedays he eats and eats so he isnt actually starving himself. Fixed regular mealtimes. Letting him choose his own meals & foods.

 

Try not to turn it into a big issue with him. If he hasn't become ill he surely is getting enough, maybe not on the same timescale as we would consume it.

 

I woul dmake a note of everything he is eating and times etc. you may be surprised at how much he actually eats. If after doing this you still think that overall he isnt eating enough then maybe you should have a word with the doc.

 

Good luck.

Mike

[loulou]

hi Leasam,

 

I would agree with what Mike said. Go to your GP if you are worried.

 

Another thing, is your son worried about anything? Is this a new thing or has he always been a poor eater? The reason i say this is because when my son was going through major stress at school, he never ate either.

 

He is always ravenous at bed time, so i give him snacks before bed (yogurts, bananas, crackers etc). Milkshakes are good too (or smoothies if he likes them?).

 

Loulou x

[Kathryn]

Hi leasam,

 

Do you know why your son isn't eating his packed lunch? My daughter never ate at school either. She would then come home and stuff herself with toast at 4 pm. It was only later that I discovered that this was due to the stress she was continually under at school. Lunchtimes were a social and sensory nightmare for her, she hated the noise and crush of the dining area and having to make conversation with other people. Could your son be experiencing something similar?

 

I think she was eating a normal amount as she had a big breakfast, just at totally unconventional times!

[denise2]

Hi Leasam, my son never ate his lunch at school as he could not bear to eat with the other children, he said they were disgusting noisy and smelly. When they stopped making him eat in the lunch hall, he started eating much better. However my son's school did not initially provide a friend for him to eat with and he did not like eating on his own.

 

With regards to hunger, we questioned this with the psychologist. He informed us that when his senses are stressed he will not be able to read his body signals and so will not be able to tell if he is hungry, thirsty, cold needing the toilet etc. So to recognise these signs he has to be in a calm environment, not my experience of school dinner halls. Have you also tried bringing the evening meal forward, we found that our son was really hungry by 5p.m. if he hadn't eaten much during the day.

 

Good Luck

 

[LittleRae]

Hi

 

Does your son get enough time to eat at school? I know my DS (9) complains that they only get 10 minutes to eat lunch and then it's out to the playground. He takes so long to get his lunchbox out, most of the kids have finished eating and are ready to go, so he rarely gets to eat. I've taken to putting grapes and strawberries in his lunchbox which I've told him to put into his pocket and eat outside (eating outside isn't allowed because of the litter problem - but I remove all stalks, etc so we won't have this problem).

 

we've tried to get him extra time, but unless he starts eating earlier than the others they've all gone out by the time he's finished and he cannot 'find' them and so spends playtime alone.

 

Some days he won't even feel hungry and it'll be 6 o'clock before I've discovered that he hasn't eaten all day.

 

A

[mossgrove]

Our son (AS, 7) is a picky eater and a very slow eater.

 

Wheras most children will wolf their lunch down and run out to play, he will sit and eat his lunch for half an hour or more. I think the school are happy to allow this because he struggles to cope with a whole lunchtime of unstructured play.

 

We used to have major stress with getting him to eat more than a very few things, but he has got a lot better in the last 12 months or so. He is still picky, but it's manageable.

 

Simon

Edited March 15, 2005 by mossgrove

[shell]

have just found out that steven has a "friend" (adult) who looks after him at lunch times and if he starts to melt down they take him out of the lunch hall and find some where quite so he can eat in peace.

the school set this up mabye if you have a word with the head they could do something simmiler

[niki]

tristan goes thru Phases, one day he eats barely enough to keep a sparrow alive others he eats like its going out of fashion,

[lisa bebbington]

Hi Leasam,

I know exactly what you are going through, as probably do a lot of us.

My son, Jonathon, also 9 is a very poor eater.

Today he has had 3 chicken wings and sweets. This isn't unusual as his diet is extremely limited.

He has recently eaten bacon for months but has now decidied he doesn't like it & always seems to ask for whatever I haven't got!!!

I now try not to worry too much as he is a good weight and I have to give him vitamins.

Take care

Lisa xx

[Sallya]

I was loaned a book called " Cat eat, Wont eat, Dietry difficulties & Autistic spectrum disorders" by Brenda Legge . It describes how a child with ASD is more than just fussy, and can be actually scared of trying new foods. I ts not just the taste, but the smell and texture of food. Its well worth a read.

xxx

[leasam]

hi, thanks for ALL your replies,

he has mentioned that he doesnt get enough time to eat at school, i also know that he finds the dinner hall difficult to deal with, what with the noise and everything, i spose i just struggle with the fact on some days he will eat and others he wont. As for his eating being a long term problem, yes it has, he's never been a good eater right from being weaned onto solids. the milkshakes sound like a good odea, im just concerned that he will like them so much that thats all he will have, it seems like he cant have things in moderation, if he likes something he will just keep on and on, but then the other problem is getting him to try something for the first time........

 

thank you all i will look into some of the suggestions made

[mbrown]

Hello again Leasam, If I were you I would stress the importance of the situation to the school and how concerend you are. I can't see any reason why your lad cannot be allowed to be given more time to eat and his own space to eat his lunch.

 

Like most things concerning our kids, eating fads or lack of eating seem to bother us a lot more than them.

 

Keep him happy but keep an eye on things.

Stay calm

Mike

[poppy]

BUILD -UP MILKSHAKES made by Nestles @�2.45 for four sachets. I know cos I get them on prescription for my 84 year old mother!

Also school would not allow my son somewhere to eat his lunch- he couldnt cope with noise or smell or other peoples disgusting habits.They didnt have someone spare to supervise him.