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Toni

feeling so guilty

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Hi everyone i haven't posted for a while but have been keeping track, my dd has been having swimming lessons for about 12 mths know and it's taken until april this year for her to move from level 1-2 in the small pool to the shallow end of the big pool, she doesn't really like swimming but keeps going as she understands it's important for saftey, we haven't been for 3 weeks and when we got there this week she had forgotten everthing, couldn't remeber how to swim at all and was terrified, i went over to talk to her and she was so sad and asked if we could go home, i got upset for her she had worked so hard to move up into this class, i feel so guilty as we hadn't been for 3 weeks because, well basicily i couldn't be bothered to take her and she doesn't mind missing because she finds it so hard, know we are back to square one her swimming teacher has said not to worry that she will stay in this class and take it slow, but i'm sure this is my fault for not taking her, i never thought she would just forget everything, i should have known as sure does have memory retention prlems but it's not happened like this before, or maybe it has and i just haven't noticed, does she forget everything she learns at school over the weekends and holidays is that why she worries so much about going back to school? sorry now i'm waffling and on a guilt trip, sorry if this sounds all over the place i just keep crying everytime i think of dd at swimming she looked so sad :crying::crying:

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>:D<<'> Deep breath, make yourself a cup of tea and think about it.

Firstly, feeling sad, guilty and upset is natural, but won't help either of you.

Parenting has an enormous amount of guilt attached to it, whether your child is NT or not. You can spend hours in the night thinking of all the things you could have done differently, and end up feeling that you are a rubbish parent (Speaking from personal experience)

 

Yes, children forget things if there is an interval in the learning process, and if it is a new skill, or one they are not comfortable or enthusiastic about, they forget more comprehensively. All children, but those with SEN often seem to forget more.

I have a book with notes, and hundreds of post-it notes because after every holiday I forget how my interactive whiteboard and the software work. I'm not keen on computers and I'm a late-comer to them.

 

Take her to the pool when you can, and get in the water and play. Have fun, in a non-stressful environment and the skills that she had will emerge.

And stop beating yourself up about feeling that you didn't get round to doing something.

Sometimes there is only so much effort and energy one person can put into things, no one can be super human 24/7 or even 12/24. I have days when all B and I have done is mooch around and watch TV or read. Sometimes we don't even get out of our pjs.

Although, like many, I would only admit that on an anonymous forum. Most people fall at some of the fences, most don't own up to it, so those that do can feel very alone.

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>:D<<'> , hi hun,I know how your feeling :rolleyes: ..........been there myself too :tearful: , if your feeling a little low yourself it can make you feel even worse when stuff like this happens.Would her dad be able to take her maybe sometime over the hols??

 

.............I,m sure the next lesson will go better, don,t give in yet o.k.

 

.......my boy has to learn stuff over and over and over again before he gets it, it does so much harder for them.Try to be positive for her and I,m sure it will click again, love suzex..........ps if in doubt have a snuggle with maisie :thumbs:

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