Karen A Report post Posted June 3, 2008 I believe that today school have attempted to give me access to the not very select group of parents of children who are subjected to informal exclusion. I was asked to collect Ben because he had been verbally stroppy for most of the morning. I informed the school that I would require written confirmation as this would amount to a half-day exclusion. When I arrived at school I was then asked to go and speak to Ben because he was upsett. I refused as I knew that he would ask to go home...which if I took him would suddenly be marked as sickness. I was informed that I was not considering my own child's well being.Evidently it is usual to ask parents to come and settle children who are upsett. I refused to take Ben home until I spoke to the LEA.Sure enough they say I am right and school cannot just send him home. We are now facing the senerio that I least wanted.....having to think about looking at other schools for a year next year. Ben has friends at his current school but I am at a loss what else to do. Why do school not understand that when a child does not like school exclusion is nothing more than an incentive to be challenging.Ben knows that he might be excluded and being at home sounds better than the current situation. Karen. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annea Report post Posted June 3, 2008 (edited) LOL Karen just noticed your post after writing my rant!!! I too believe I am a member of the same club!!!! <edited because : oops to clarify..... my eldest daughter with A/S is no longer in school> Do we get a badge?? Maybe one for the most unpopular parents too??? Anne Edited June 3, 2008 by Annea Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JsMum Report post Posted June 3, 2008 Hi Karen <'> must of been a real difficult moment, I dont know what Id of done, probably take J home and arrange a meeting, getting to the root of why Ben doesnt want to be at school may help look at some ideas to get him to like it especially if he has friends at school, but if he stays at home he wont be playing with them, instead at home all day alone, the school are totally rejecting there responsibilites and personally showing an attitude like they quite possibly dont care, our school wouldnt of behaved at all in this manner, if they feel they can no longer meet his needs then they should be arranging a supportive alternative, not ringing you to take him for it to be even harder for you to bring him back. I would arrange a meeting with the HT senco, teacher and discuss a possible support package when Ben is stressed, its been a very hectic year for many schools with flood damage, and SATs and now preperation for Summer Holidays, so change, maybe Ben needs an assessment by the Ed psych, who can offer behaviour management from the school. Whats obvous is Ben is clearly stressed at the moment, how is his behaviour at home, sleeping, eating. JsMum Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cmuir Report post Posted June 3, 2008 Hi Couldn't have put it better myself. Last year when my son started P1 his behaviour was challenging to say the least. During his first hour (can you believe that?!) I was frogmarched to the HTs office and told I'd be called for if this happened again. I was too upset to respond, but I made my feelings perfectly clear in terms of what I expected of her and what she can and cannot do. Every morning without fail, my son has a performance about going to school yet once there he's absolutely fine. I'm pretty sure that this is attributable to a combination of anxiety as well as the fact he'd love to lie in bed watching DVDs or playing on his wii or ds lite! After an incredibly difficult start at school, I sought help from professionals who sat at the back of Rs class for three weeks observing and advising staff how to manage Rs behaviour (what they said they saw was a very anxious little boy - poor soul/heartbreaking!). They then came us with an action plan and as a last resort I may be called to collect R from school. I wasn't at all happy about this, but it was pointed out that if R was deemed to be a danger to himself or others, they had no choice. I could see their point. In my view, it's only under these circumstances that it should be acceptable for a child to be suspended/excluded and written notification need to be given. I'm sure it's unlawful for the school to do what they did in your case. Caroline. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Enid Report post Posted June 3, 2008 (edited) Oh Karen My god how I wish I could have been there, if I had know all these years I would have done it too, I did tell them on the phone before half-term, as I had learnt off this site that it was an illegal exclusion, but all these years and I didnt know well done to you, it must have been soo hard, but as you say if the going gets tough they want to come home, its the easy option, mine did it for all of his time at primary school and I thought I HAD to pick him up, what fool! Enid Edited June 4, 2008 by Enid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tilly Report post Posted June 4, 2008 Hi, Enid I'm too a member of the club. What a fool I was in the past. I also had to collect dd all the time in mainstream primary and she was never allowed to stay for lunch. She could stay for 2 hours on a morning and 1 hour on an afternoon and then I had to return back for her sister who was 14 months older at 3.15.pm. It was 5 round trips everyday and noone thought to let me know otherwise - must say very disappointed in my Parent Partnership Rise above it Tilly. Still riles me 5 years later - so now I let others know that it is illegal to do so. Well done Karen I wish I'd had your know how then - keep it up. tilly Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stressedmumto2 Report post Posted June 4, 2008 Karen you have my sympathies. I'm too in that group and my son's excluded for the day today, exclusion doesn't work, my son's a school refuser and before I told him he was excluded he told me he wasn't going to school tomorrow, great eh!! At least you have the evidence they are finding it hard to meet your child's needs and this should give them the evidence/knowledge to put different things into place. My son's school's lame excuse for not doing an internal exclusion was they didn't have the staff. When son was in primary we had many illegal exclusion, now when the schoolcall to say he's excluded tomorrow or even on an internal I ask for a letter <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites