Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
Marion

Feel like I've failed miserably.........

Recommended Posts

Hi,

just had ds school report , he's been at the school for 3 years and we've struuggled the whole time to get them to understand he needs help and support, they just dont get it and I feel its all my fault because I cant get them to understand........ds has Aspergers, dyspraxia, severe dyslexia and situation inattentive hyperactivity disorder, we have no statement as "school dont see he has a problem"-he holds it together most of the time at school but this is affecting his mental health.

Went to tribunal-we live in an area with very little help- to try to get a statement and had the LEA and the headteacher against us-we lost.

 

Anyway, spent years talkin tryin, buyin them books etc and just got his report.....

 

"A must make sure that he works and behaves well for all staff that work in school" eh?

 

"A must consider the content of his writing as he can be inclined to include references to wrestlers which reduces the overall quality of his work"

 

"He needs to have secure written methods of both multiplication and division.He tends to work fairly slowly in assessment situations.He must remember to estimate, calculate and check but also work at speed"

 

"He must ensure that he writes down what he has found out as his work can often lack detail"

 

"he must make sure he remains focused"

 

"his written work is often incomplete due to lack of focus"

 

"could include more detail in written work,target in yr6?"

 

"he must ensure he stays focused in order to complete the task"

 

A is very easily distracted in lessons and unfortunately hasn't made the progress he is capable of"

 

Can anyone tell me truthfully-is it me?!

 

To me this shows a child who needs support, these people are teachers, do they think they can't still learn? Feel like am banging my head against a brick wall, used to be a smoker, just gone and bought some!!DH livid but what can we do, sorry to go on but would welcome any guidance.regards, Marion

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Marion, and welcome to the forum.

 

It sounds like you have done all you can to get the right support for your son. I really can't see how any of this is your fault.

 

All of these comments do seem consistent with his diagnoses.

 

A lot of people have difficulty getting their children's educators to understand the child's needs. You are definitely not the only person in this situation.

 

I don't know much about the education system myself, but there are many people here who do. There may be something someone can suggest.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi, Marion.

 

From what you've said, it looks like you've tried everything with the school. Have you been to your GP to see if they can help?

 

Is there a Parent Partnership in your area - I've not had any experience of them myself, but I gather from others that they can be really helpful. Here's a link :Parent Partnership

 

There's also some information at the NAS website : NAS

 

I hope that might help

 

Nicky >:D<<'> >:D<<'> >:D<<'>

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Marion >:D<<'> >:D<<'>

 

I know how frustrating this is. In my son's first semester school report a couple of weeks ago, (he's 7, diagnosed with AS, has auditory processing disorder, possibly innattentive ADHD too and goes to a mainstream ps), the teacher commented that he needs to, 'listen more in class', and he 'needs to learn to work more independently', but with no comment how she is actually going to help him - such as more visual cues like written instructions. Hmm. The teacher has been to two professional development days with Tony Attwood this year. I wonder if she nipped out to the local cafe instead and sat there sipping on cappucino's the whole time.

 

Oh yes, my son was very unhappy during the last week of school before the holidays, and didn't want to go to school - social issues in the playground - and the teacher said, 'he looks fine to me'. :crying:

 

So I know how frustrating this is :wallbash:

 

I'm sorry to hear that you lost >:D<<'> >:D<<'>.

 

Eva

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi did you no that you could apply again for a statement. im not sure but i think that you have to wait 6 months/12months after you last requested a statement. do you have more evidence ieps ect.. Also if you can afford it, private assesments could also help. Anyway i wish you good lck in helping your son with his education.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Try again for a statement! it is not right that you were turned down! It is all about money and not our children. I can not beleive(well I can and do) that our children come down to budgets! We must fight this. Your child has the right to an equal oppertunities education, he learns in a different way and needs 1-1 to help for him reach his potential.It is disgusting (in my opinion) that you need to fight for the help, let alone be turned down. EVERY CHILD MATTERS says the goverment?????

The difference can be made now if the LEA give him the help NOW

I know just how exhasting the fight is but try again if you can for a statement. Early intevention is what the proffesionals bang on about then budgets get in the way............. :wallbash::wallbash::wallbash::wallbash:

Good luck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I found an outreach worker from an autistic special school in the county helped - she came in and gave the school things to look out for, and then came back to assess how well they had done against her recommendations.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Marion,

I am a teacher who works with ASD pupils at a Primary Special School. I really feel for you and believe that this is certainly not down to you at all! These processes do unfortunately take a long time but as others have suggested you should not give up because things do change and if there is evidence that your child is being adversely affected at school by his disabilities then the school is obligated to take some measures to support him. Is he on School action or School Action plus at the moment? If so, what does he currently receive support-wise?

 

I would suggest you make an appointment to see the Head and the SENCO together and go through the report with them - highlight those areas and ask them how you and the school can help your son overcome those difficulties the school have identified. He may need extra support from the SENCO or perhaps even some 1:1 time with a Teaching Assistant. It is really frustrating but if you can try to remain positive and make it clear that you want to work with the school, and not fight against them, to get the best for your son then hopefully you shouldn't have too many problems.

 

Emmet

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Marion,

" if there is evidence that your child is being adversely affected at school by his disabilities then the school is obligated to take some measures to support him. Is he on School action or School Action plus at the moment? If so, what does he currently receive support-wise?

 

Emmet

[/qu

 

DS was on School Action plus but only because they had the specialist autism teacher in (at my request) to advise them. Because, I presume, of her case load and school saying he doesnt present them with any problems, she say him once and discharged him, he is now on school action. The only support he receives is from the classroom assistant who helps the whole class.Am at the end of my tether, wondering if they want him to leave as I cant believe they can ignore his problems like this, thanks Marion

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok - well your first goal needs to be to get him back to School Action Plus as I think it's unlikely he'd go straight from School Action to statemented. Keep a journal of anything which in your opinion shows he is struggling and not accessing the curriculum; if he complains about school or becomes reluctant to go, if his behaviour changes at home, if his teacher says anything negative to you etc etc - record and date it all as it will serve as evidence should you need it in the future. In the meantime, I'd strongly suggest you make an appointment to see the Head and the SENCO and talk about his report with them.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...