Peed Off - Again.....

[Yorkie]

Well, school are at it again............

 

They advertised for an SNA after we got D's statement dated 2nd February, and I checked on the LEA website and it specifically stated 'start date 4/4/05'. Went back to school on Monday, enquired as to where this new SNA was, and was told that the interviews dont even start till 18th April, they have had 34 applications and its been hard to shortlist them.... I asked if they had any idea when this person would start and was told that it depends on if they have to give notice from their current job.......

 

The existing classroom assistant has agreed to do full time till someone is employed, but although he is supported, its not someone who is special-needs trained (think she might have read a book or watched rain man.......) She is a lovely lady and is fab, but they all just keep trying to get him to conform, rather than treat him as an individual with individual needs.

 

Home/School diary...theres another tale. Set up on my insistence, has suddenly dwindled off again. I asked teacher today what exactly she thought this book was for, and she said 'to let us know anything that had happened rather than discussing it at the end of school'!!!! i.e. eaten mud or spitiing today - how negative!! I explained that my idea of it was, to keep us informed of what D had done throughout his day so we could discuss it or encourage it at home also, therefore helping his understanding/conversational skill etc.... was told, 'NO thats not what is for, the school newsletter tells you what the topics are every month, like everbody else..

 

Stupid me!!! I was under the impression that the school was getting large sums of funding to provide adequate and tailored support for my lad, to keep me informed of everything and anything that can help his progress! Teachers are always complaining that they dont get any support from parents, but heres ours saying basically 'keep your nose out, we'll do it our way!!!!'

 

A few monhs ago, after a big meeting with Head, I got it in writing that they would inform me when any professional was visiting the school. Today, popped in to see SALT, who said 'i was just about to ring you!' cos shed been in to school yesterday and no-one had told me - again. Broached this with Teacher who said 'well she comes into school to see other children as well, and our agreement is for her to ring you to tell you whats gone on' nobody told me that either.....

 

The we get to IEP...... in February a AS specialist went into school to help write new IEP, I attended and teacher said 'ill copy this down properly, then let you see it' still waiting.....and waiting... so mentioned it today as well and she said 'oh i'll get you a copy' When i informed her that i actually had to sign it and agree it, she just looked at me like something off the bottom of her shoe!!' I also said we should be having half-termly review soon, so a new one would have to be written anyway!!!

 

It seems like all the extra work involved is a hassle for her, although he has full time classroom support (allegedly..) so she could be filling in the book etc. etc. AND this year, theres only 20 kids in the class!!!

 

I am SOOOO fed up this week, it seems the battle has begun again.........

[Minxygal]

(think she might have read a book or watched rain man.......)

 

Ah, Now I see where you're coming from.

 

Poor you.

I hate it when I read things like this because I have been there too and it's amazing how similarly we are all treated isn't it? Why does it always have to feel like it's a fight?

 

Wouldn't it be lovely to walk into school one day and find them one step ahead.

 

Keep your chin up sweetie

 

A x

[Helen]

Hi Yorkie,

They advertised for an SNA after we got D's statement dated 2nd February, and I checked on the LEA website and it specifically stated 'start date 4/4/05'. Went back to school on Monday, enquired as to where this new SNA was, and was told that the interviews dont even start till 18th April, they have had 34 applications and its been hard to shortlist them....

This is where your input would be so valuable to the school. Are you going to be part of this interviewing and decision making process? As the school hasn't complied with the LEA's advertisement, you could try making an official complaint about the school for its inaction in employing a SNA.

 

The issue of the home/school diary - write a brief note to the Senco, explaining your conversation with the teacher and state how you want to see the home/school diary implemented.

A few monhs ago, after a big meeting with Head, I got it in writing that they would inform me when any professional was visiting the school

The Disability Rights Commission acknowledges AS as a disability. Your son has an official diagnosis of AS therefore he has certain rights whilst he's in school. Have you tried phoning the DRC helpline for some advice regarding the school not informing you of the professional's visit? The DRC may be able to provide you with a solution to counteract any more oversights. If you haven't been in touch with the DRC their helpline no. is: 08457 622 633, you can speak to an operator at any time between 08:00 and 20:00, Monday to Friday.

 

The issue of the IEP - are you keeping a detailed diary of the whole 'schooling process'? A record of any hiccup no matter how big or small, could prove useful at a later stage.

[Yorkie]

I'm not going to be part of the interviewing process Helen, when I asked before 'what if i dont like them'. Head answered' do you really think I would employ someone YOU didnt like@ meaning that the sh*t she would get from me would not be worth it!!!!!!

 

I am loathe to report the school Helen, mainly because of the fallout afterwards. they justify this by saying that they have had so many applications, and that they want to get the RIGHT personal for the job, not just rush to employ anyone... Also, he is actually supported, so they dont see my concerns.....

 

Home school diary, surprise surprise, it came home tonight with the words - no problems - good day! written in. What exactly does that mean? He didnt eat anything, fall out with anyone, hit anyone, was quiet etc etc??? i.e. didnt get on anyones nerves more like....

 

I am so concerned that if I rock the boat anymore, it will backfire on me. They already keep saying that he has made so much progress, much calmer etc etc. teacher told me at parents evening last month that she didnt see him as 'standing out' anymore. I just said that was probably because she was used to him and his quirks now.

 

Why am I so suspicious of that comment? I feel that this will lead to removal of support eventually...what a cynic I am (or realist!!!)

 

Another case of damned if you do, damned if you dont...........

[Minxygal]

I am so concerned that if I rock the boat anymore, it will backfire on me. They already keep saying that he has made so much progress, much calmer etc etc. teacher told me at parents evening last month that she didnt see him as 'standing out' anymore. I just said that was probably because she was used to him and his quirks now.

 

Why am I so suspicious of that comment? I feel that this will lead to removal of support eventually...what a cynic I am (or realist!!!)

 

Another case of damned if you do, damned if you dont........... unsure.gif

 

 

 

I can totally relate to this hun. I sit in meetings and I feel as if I am the ony one who sees the problems my son faces and it means that most of what I have to say comes across really negative and that leaves me with one hell of a feeling of guilt.

 

It's not that I want to paint my son as the son of satan, it's just that I find a lot of what they say as totally realistic and often it makes it look as if most of his problems come from home rather than being general.

It made me cross that I was getting blow by blow reports of incidents that occured on a daily basis and yet when it came to review there was no mention of an increase in agression. When I mentioned this at review they said they liked to keep things as positive as possible. I can see that and I agree but what they forget is how important these reports are to some of us when it comes to accessing support in the future. These unrealistic pictures they paint of our kids make it really hard to evidence their needs for the future.

 

As for the suspicion, you know how they operate and that's why you feel that way I suppose. They do seem to think that because a child is coping with support it's because they've learned to behave rather than the fact that they are actually coping better with the help of the support.

 

That headteacher sounds like a right one by the way.

[lisa]

One of the things that annoys me so much is that the majority of us seem to have the same struggle with school and are treated as if we are "making a mountain out of a molehill". When will these schools understand that it's not the parents.

 

I am so concerned that if I rock the boat anymore, it will backfire on me. They already keep saying that he has made so much progress, much calmer etc etc. teacher told me at parents evening last month that she didnt see him as 'standing out' anymore.

 

I can really relate to this. I've created merry hell at our school and this is exactly what's happening with us. I think that the school think if they downplay L's difficulties and tell me there's not a problem anymore I'll back off and leave them to it.

 

Lisa

[Corcaigh]

Yorkie, I can simpatize soooo much with your experience, to the point that we are about to ge our son off mainstream school, we are just fed up with fighting with incompetence and ignorance everyday.

Best of luck, really

[Klou]

Hi

 

I had to reply and I really don't want to cause offence but I am here with my 'teacher' hat on.

 

Politics, spending and SEN support are emotive subjects in school.

 

I know that that the AS child I taught last year needed his SNA - all the time, not just for literacy and numeracy. However the SNA who also had other roles in the school was not there all the time. Teaching disrupted and incidents to resolve. Not the child's fault I know however the result is one extremely tired teacher with a ton of things to do and hopefully a healthy conscience as to whether the best is being done for the children in her care. At least that is how I feel. Enormous stress if back up not being received from SENCO and headteacher.

 

I am not excusing. Your child needs support now but if the regular class assistant is stepping into the breach they may not know that much about the dx but at least they have some idea of what your child is like.

 

I have no idea what the answer is but if I was your son's teacher I would be frustrated too.

 

Regarding CA and making child conform. The CA will be doing what the school tell her to do and taking her lead from the teacher. Can you ask the teacher - based on his statement and his IEP, hopefully he has one, - to discuss with CA appropriate alternatives so he does not have to conform. Afterall the Statement declares he has special educational needs in my book that means that these should be catered for. The best TA's and SNA's I have worked with actually tell me when x,y,z would be a better idea and can they do that instead.

 

I think the school your son is at need some grey paint. Might remind them that not everything is black and white!

[Yorkie]

No offence taken at all love.....

 

It was because of the other kids in D's class AS WELL as him, that I requested a statement, the school told me he wouldnt get one because 'he wasnt bad enough'

 

I understand that it would be impossible for my lad to get the full support he needs when the teacher has other kids to deal with. It wouldnt be fair on the other kids either!! Thats why I decided it would be best all round to get the fundng and statement to make sure the school got the resources needed to educate my lad properly wihtout this affecting the other kids education. The school are ###### glad of it now arent they!!! I did most of the work, (as well as SENCO who is fab) and they get the money!!!

 

My argument is, that I've done my bit, a big bit i might add, and now they have the resources, the teacher is not listening, understanding or using the resources how they should be used for my lad. She thinks 'she knows best', although when i ask her questions about my lads behaviours, she knows sod all about his sensory issues etc (even though I have told her!!!) because she has CHOSEN not to listen and discounts our opinions. In the next breath she will ask why he does certain things, and i explain AGAIN, she acts like i have just told her something new!!! I get sooooooo frustrated, as if she had took on board what we've told her, she would know already!!!

 

I think it all depends on the individual teacher, and in this case, my lads has got as much to learn as he has................................

[Klou]

Well done you for all your hard work.

 

I really hope it pays off and your lad gets the support he is entitled to. Its a shame about his teacher. She could make a big difference.

 

It is certainly appalling that the resources etc are not being used. I suspect SENCO is also . Thoug she ought to have something to say about it all when it comes to review and little progress has been made. Although not necessarily to you.......

 

Hope the SNA situation is resolved soon. At least with a statement anywhere else he goes to school will be able to get going straight away. I guess some people just don't believe what ASD children really need/support the dx.