szxmum Report post Posted April 17, 2009 Hi everyone What early signs of Aspergers did you first become aware of in your child? I would be really interested to hear other's experiences, especially if you are the parent of a child with a "late" diagnosis and are "looking back" with the experience of hindsight My ds is 17 and we are expecting a dx of AS in the next couple of weeks. Looking back I can remember things like: - arranging 3 bottles with green tops in a pattern with precise 120 degree angles between them. I was so proud of my clever 9 month old son. - knowing the name of every estate agent and recognising their different signs - he was 18 months old - lining up his cars in colour order on our window sill - Pokemon - the first time round - seperation anxiety - he cried every single time I left him at playgroup for two whole years but.... I soldiered on because I was told he needed to socialise - sitting by my feet at Mums & Tots and rarely moving - Other Mum's "He is shy, isn't he?" or "He is sooo quiet and well-behaved" Later on at Primary School I can remember very clearly: - the seperation agony of Reception year - ds being unable to do up his zip and his best friend, the little mother, doing it for him - the same packed lunch every day for years on end - trying out school dinners for exactly two weeks and then asking to go back on packed lunch because I told him that if he didn't like it after 2 weeks he could go back on packed lunch - struggling learning to tie shoelaces (we're still not much cop at 17 ) - desperate handwriting - excellent grades - 3 levels 5s in Year 6 - asking to change school in year 4 to go to a class where the children all followed the rules - this meant that the teacher wouldn't shout - struggling with swimming, football, rounders, riding a bike and so on - endless reports comments of "ds is a very quiet, shy, clever, well-behaved member of class" What pleased, proud parents we were - why oh why didn't we know what this meant? Didn't any member of staff guess or were thay just relieved that he was one less child to worry about. I spoke to his year 4 recently about ds and AS - she remembered him and said.... wait for it.... oh no, he was just shy..... If only she knew the pain awaiting him at secondary school but that's for another post.... Thx for reading - would love to hear other's experiences xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
frogslegs Report post Posted April 17, 2009 Hi everyone What early signs of Aspergers did you first become aware of in your child? I would be really interested to hear other's experiences, especially if you are the parent of a child with a "late" diagnosis and are "looking back" with the experience of hindsight My ds is 17 and we are expecting a dx of AS in the next couple of weeks. Looking back I can remember things like: - arranging 3 bottles with green tops in a pattern with precise 120 degree angles between them. I was so proud of my clever 9 month old son. - knowing the name of every estate agent and recognising their different signs - he was 18 months old - lining up his cars in colour order on our window sill - Pokemon - the first time round - seperation anxiety - he cried every single time I left him at playgroup for two whole years but.... I soldiered on because I was told he needed to socialise - sitting by my feet at Mums & Tots and rarely moving - Other Mum's "He is shy, isn't he?" or "He is sooo quiet and well-behaved" Later on at Primary School I can remember very clearly: - the seperation agony of Reception year - ds being unable to do up his zip and his best friend, the little mother, doing it for him - the same packed lunch every day for years on end - trying out school dinners for exactly two weeks and then asking to go back on packed lunch because I told him that if he didn't like it after 2 weeks he could go back on packed lunch - struggling learning to tie shoelaces (we're still not much cop at 17 ) - desperate handwriting - excellent grades - 3 levels 5s in Year 6 - asking to change school in year 4 to go to a class where the children all followed the rules - this meant that the teacher wouldn't shout - struggling with swimming, football, rounders, riding a bike and so on - endless reports comments of "ds is a very quiet, shy, clever, well-behaved member of class" What pleased, proud parents we were - why oh why didn't we know what this meant? Didn't any member of staff guess or were thay just relieved that he was one less child to worry about. I spoke to his year 4 recently about ds and AS - she remembered him and said.... wait for it.... oh no, he was just shy..... If only she knew the pain awaiting him at secondary school but that's for another post.... Thx for reading - would love to hear other's experiences xx The first sign was that he could not join in games at nursery, he would butt in and just did not play naturally. He was obsessed with trains although he never lined them up but that was his one and only topic of conversation and pretty much still is. When he was three, he knew all the stops of the local bus routes (quite a few of them) and knew whole bits of encyclopeadia by heart. He also had and still has an incredible eye for detail. He is very very uncoordinated, although he is a very good swimmer but that is the only sport he enjoys, he can't run, skip (he goes backwards), he can ride a bike but looks like he is going to fall off it any minute. He also has trouble with fine motor skills (cutting, writing, using cutlery, tying shoelaces.. and even got the most improved eating manners at the end of Reception (makes me smile really....). He also has problems with organisation. By the end of year 2 he had no friends, was constantly miserable, telling me he wanted to die, self-harming... All this happened and nobody put 2 and 2 together because he is doing well at school (read very fluently by the time he was 4) and that he is not a problem to the teachers inside the classroom. I had no experience of Asperger before so I did not know what I was looking at. It's only when an acquaintance at the pool told me after I had explained my frustrations that he was very similar to her son who had ASD. When I looked it up on the internet it just clicked and then when I talked to the school they said ahh maybe that would explain and finally I went to see the GP who dismissed me and with whom I ended up having a major argument.... A year later and we have just received the diagnosis. We were all looking at individual issues rather than looking at the whole child. I think all little children are clumsy up to a point and not all great social beasts but it is when they grow a bit older that the differentiation is more obvious. Don't beat yourself up too much about it, it does not help...I have struggle just like you (my son is in year 5) and just getting to grasp with what is happening. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
szxmum Report post Posted April 18, 2009 Hi frogslegs Thanks for replying I am still very new to this but am so very relieved to have found this forum. I have learnt more in the last couple of days than I have in the past year Thanks again, sdxmum xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flora Report post Posted April 18, 2009 A few weeks ago I was staying with my auntie and uncle who dug out some video footage they had of my kids when they were all very young. I hadn't seen the footage before and was amazed by the very typical and text book presentation of AS in my son. Bill, who is now 15, was about 4 when the footage was taken and I hadn't even heard of AS at the time, let alone had any idea he might have it. I was amazed by how much flapping, spinning and weird jerky body movements he did constantly, he was literally never still the whole way through several hours of video footage and made absolutely no eye contact nor really listened to anyone else, just his own voice. I just used to think he was a bit hyper! We aren't given a map or a guide book on child development, we just tick off certain mile stones as they go along, and HF/AS kids tend to meet most of the mile stones even if we are aware they are 'different'. I actually thought that with Bill I had a 'genius' on my hands as he was brilliant at jigsaws, talked before he was one year old, and could read before he started school. Sometimes I think the fact that I had no idea of AS or HFA is what made the diagonsis so straight forward; ie, I wasn't pushing for it, it was instigated by his school and I think my ignorance of the labels made the job of the professionals a bit easier. We can only do our best. Flora Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
aliwoo Report post Posted April 18, 2009 my son was diagnosed at age 6, so although not a late diagnosis i do see signs when i look back. as a baby he never used to be 'clingy' he would just sit and play in the playpen for ages if you let him, his play was very repetitive too or he'd just bash things (still does) he used to bang his head on the floor when crying or sometimes he'd do it and laugh...seemed to cheer him up in some way he took toys apart all the time to see how they worked. line things up..usually in size order at mum and tots he used to just play on his own and when a kid tried to play with him he'd usually come to me crying (now he loves to play with others but he does it by chasing or getting them to chase him lol) at nusery he was labeled a 'bad child' due to his behaviour. cos he is my oldest and at the time was my only child we all figured it was due to him not being used to kids his own age....looking back i know different. he used to throw BIG wobblys and throw tables memorising the way to somewhere and getting upset if we go a different way. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Karen A Report post Posted April 18, 2009 (edited) Hi. I think Probably the thing that makes me think most now was Ben's behaviour with both other children and adults in nursery.He was very good at organising people.He also talked away to adults about things that interested him.It was recognised that Ben was very bright.We also lived in a house with a friend of ours and had done since Ben was born.Everyone thought Ben was very articulate and had an adult manner because he had so much adult imput. Karen. Edited April 18, 2009 by Karen A Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
purplehaze Report post Posted April 18, 2009 Hi late speech head banged didn't pass a hearing test and only past a few yrs ago (he is 15 now) liked to be on his own no facial expressions-pointing etc no eye contact massive meltdowns no signs of pain or cold wants things his way no empathy played on his own could do 100 piece jigsaw at 3 fine motor stuff-still struggle with laces, buttons, writing etc Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Enid Report post Posted April 18, 2009 I too recently watched a video of my children, when DS was 4, he is now 13, I was amazed, even shocked, how classic his symptons were, how could I not have noticed! low monotone voice, endless talking, no eye contact, no social awarenenss ,really poor/terrible co-ordination, he wasnt diagnosed till 11, after school exclusion. I too was proud at his memory and how clever he was, even though his writing was appalling. He was so articulate, typical "little professor" now I think about it. also rubbish at all kinds of sport except swimming which he loves. I can remember one holiday when I became ill and was taking painkillers and antibiotics every couple of hours, he had a list with times and medications on and was ticking them off when I took them, I thought it was really sweet the other 3 just moaned and watched videos. why oh why didnt I twig, I should add that I work in childcare, and always have!. Enid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
