£1,000,000 For...?

[TheNeil]

Given that it's stupidly hot (ha, now that's an understatement) I figured that I'd give £1,000,000* to the person who invents a practical personal air-con unit

 

This then got me thinking...

 

I'd give £1,000,000* to anyone who can...

• cancel Wimbledon
• invent bagels that don't go mouldy
• come up with an easy way for me to move my desk outside of the office on nice (not hot) days
• remake Return of The Jedi...but make it good
• bump Keith Chegwin off
• X-ray glasses that really work

Just for fun, what would you give £1,000,000 for?

 

 

 

 

 

 

* The term '£1,000,000' is used a representative rather than actual value. Actual cash value of 0.00001p. No alternative prizes will be awarded or offered. The judge's decision is final. No correspondence will be entered into. Blah, blah, blah

Edited June 30, 2009 by TheNeil

[pearl]

A bed which sends you to sleep as soon as you get in it ... (2 hours last night)

[purplehaze]

 

I'm with pearl

 

 

[pearl]

I'm with pearl

 

Oh its you keeping me awake is it?

[Enid]

Yes, a nights sleep, a whole 8 hours

 

A longer life span for dogs, my little chap in nearly 14, he is getting soooo frail.

 

A school that understands my DS.

 

A phone that dosn`t need charging.

 

A taxi driver on hand to take all my kids to their various activities

 

right I`ll leave it there, but will be back!

 

Enid

[David Matthew Baker]

First just to make sure everyones clear these are covered by the same (that was almost sane, which I guess is also true) terms and conditions in Neils original post. Be aware that in all case the rights and all related trademarks will also be transfered to me.

 

• A tardis - The ability to teleport to somewhere and also to anytime seems really handy. Could have real fun if a day never ended - I'd just sleep onboard to stay fresh. I think the first thing I'd do is go and spend some more time on the activity camp I helped with at the weekend. Actually I'd probably go back to one of the ones I went to when I was young before the requirements of qualifications for all activities got too silly. I miss the scrambling. The week long camp also sounds fun. It's just 2 days now. I do like sailing (not that I did any at the camp), kayaking (you may or may not know I own one - can't recal when I last posted) and the other adventure activities. I could also get to work quicker everyday. I love where I live but getting to work everyday does take a while.
• A Saunders-Roe Princess Flying Boat, the ability to fly a plane and unlimited fuel. Would be a great way to travel and everytime I fancied a kayaking session at Coniston I could just fly across. I've always loved flying boats for some reason.
• A steam train and a decent section of track to run it on. The Hexham to Alston branch (would need relaying in standard gauge) would be lovely. Who hasn't dreamed of driving a steam train.
• A PC that cools a room whilst it is running rather than heating it. My room was bad enough without the PC been on. A personal cooler like the one Neil asked for I guess would also be okay. That said I'd like more settings than my car. I generally like it around 12-13 degrees so why is the first numerical setting 16 and the low setting after a while makes me feel like I'm living in the arctic.
• The ability to mind meld. At times I wish I knew what the kids I'm working with are thinking as it would then help me comfort them. I can read a lot of them well but not all of them.
• Someone with some IT knowledge to sort out my schools computer system and to only block sites that warrant blocking. Why do schools systems always feel as if someone has gone block happy with them. The number of times I've been asked to help someone research something only to find its blocked is annoying. On that note a list of web based proxies without the word proxy in the sites address would be worth the money too to bypass the draconian protection on the systems. Not that I'd let any kids know you can get round them.
• Full knowledge of html so I could get this post to look right first time!!!

Edited June 30, 2009 by David Matthew Baker

[TheNeil]

A GP who actually works more than 10 minutes a year

 

A car that runs in water and doesn't need filling up (especially on the one morning that I'm running late)

 

A device that warns when the likes of Piers Morgan, Amanda Holden, John McCrirrick and other Z-list 'celebs' are about to appear on TV (possibly replacing them with some nice calming music and a picture of a kitten playing with a ball of wool)

 

Inspector Gadget style 'extendable arms'

 

£2,000,000

 

Some new programmes on Dave that aren't Top Gear, Ray Mears or QI

 

Anti-depressants that actually do what their name says

[pearl]

An aircon system at work that didn't blast icy draughts over me in December & give me flu .... yet now, when its 30c in the office, has packed in altogether! We have fans moving steam around here.

[NobbyNobbs]

for men to stop complaining about wimbledon when i've sat through months of football without saying a word!

[Mad cat lady]

Someone with some IT knowledge to sort out my schools computer system and to only block sites that warrant blocking. Why do schools systems always feel as if someone has gone block happy with them. The number of times I've been asked to help someone research something only to find its blocked is annoying. On that note a list of web based proxies without the word proxy in the sites address would be worth the money too to bypass the draconian protection on the systems. Not that I'd let any kids know you can get round them.

 

Ha Ha Ha, I used to work in IT with the council I did the schools computers, blocking all the proxy servers to stop people using them, (try asking the kids which ones they use!!!)