not happy

[beckyjen]

Hi all

 

Just come back from a meeting at my sons school in preparation for him moving to upper school (year 3), not at all happy feel like I’m back at square one. My sons year 2 teacher has been so helpful and has tried her best to get him lots of help, only when we introduced ourselves to his new teachers they pretty much laughed at us and made out that we were fussy interfering parents that had dreamt the whole thing up. To top it all off we have also found out that he has 2 teachers next year as they will be job sharing which in its self is going to be a big problem as my son doesn't cope well when his routine is changed.

Liam has good days and bad days, today was one of them good days when he comes home happy, he has no worries about work he didn't finish, friends noise etc but on a bad day the slightest little noise really irritates him to the extent he will remove himself from the classroom, he has a really poor concentration span and very rarely finishes work although he seems to learn and store the info in his head. I’ve known days when I’ve walked past the school at play times and he will be sat by himself and complains about this on regular occasions.

I don't expect the teachers to fix these problems just help us make his school life easier and more enjoyable, but instead we have come away feeling that he will be receiving no extra help next year and will be expected to get on with like every other child in his year.

 

Has anyone had this problem with their school?? We are yet to get his official diagnosis and we are still waiting on follow up appointments. The school seems to want proof that he has aspergers before they will help him further with his education but not sure how I can provide this??

 

We have also been informed that he will be receiving swimming lessons in September, he is terrified of water and I feel like this is going to be a big embarrassment for him, what’s more the school are saying that everyone has to do the swimming lesson as it is school policy ?!?!?!

[Diane]

Hi there,

 

I too have expereinced school thinking I was an over fussy parent and over protective.

 

Do school know you are waiting for a diagnosis?

 

Is your son on School action plus?

 

I would insit on a meeting with the SENCO and the head and put in writing your concerns before you go so they know exactly why oyu need the meeting. They need to know your do not feel you are being taken seriously and that your son is not being supported in the way that he needs.

 

You could always contact your special needs officer at county.

 

Our parent partnership are brilliant (I know in other areas this may not be the case) they will go to meetings with you and make sure you get what you need if they cannot then they will help you get it.

 

Good luck

 

[beckyjen]

Hi Diane

 

I have informed his present teacher that he is waiting for a diagnosis and this info was then past on to his new teachers, i'm now wondering if i should go over their heads and straight to the head to see if there is anything he could do to get things moving.

I have arranged to see his teacher after school so will ask about the action plus as i've never heard this being mentioned before, he has been given an IEP and hes also being attending a group at school called S.U.L.P (not sure what this stands for). I'm currently sitting here sifting through all of his school paper work to try and see what it is he is getting help with and what he needs if that makes sense.

Thank you for your advise i'm deffenatly going to push this with the school and will be asking to se the SENCO like you suggested will keep you updated.

 

 

[beckyjen]

hi again diane

 

S.U.L.P = Social use of language program, just looked it up lol

 

sorry still trying to get my head around all these abbreviations

[Sally44]

It sounds like school are going through the special educational needs process, but you are unaware of them or what they mean.

If he has an IEP this means he is already on School Action Plus. Therefore school must have already asked for outside professionals - usually Speech and Language Therapist and Educational Psychologist to come into school and observe your child and identify his needs (difficulties), and make recommendations as to how school can meet those needs.

I would therefore recommend that you write into school and ask for the paperwork these professionals produced at SA+ stage. If school say that they were never given any written documentation (which is not unusual), I would ask them who saw your child and write to them asking them to detail to you and school what assessments they carried out, what they observed, what needs they identified and what their recommendations are as to how school will meet those needs.

 

If he is going to a SULP, they have identified that he has problems with the social use of language, social interaction and play skills. Therefore he has difficulties during times when he has to use those skills such as Playtime, Dinnertime etc. There are lots of things that school can be doing to support him. This area of difficulty is also under the remit of the SALT. So when you write to them tell them that your son has difficulties in this area, which have been noticed as he attends a SULP. Tell them that your son wants to play and make friends, but he does not know how to do it and that you would like them to advise you and school on how they will teach him some basic social skills and how these will be generalised into the playground and who will support him and prompt him during playtime/dinnertime to use those skills. There is a good assessment/monitoring system called SCERTS which you can ask the SALT about. Google it to see what it is. They can also use things like circle of friends, dinnertime clubs, structured and supported play.

 

My son also used to spend playtimes on his own. He used to walk up and down the playground fence repeating TV/DVD dialogue to himself. His last school, and professionals were reluctant to do anything because they said 'he needed time to be allowed to be autistic'. But my son was telling me that he wanted to play. So, to cut a long story short, we got him Statemented and moved to another school that was mixed mainstream/SEN specialist in ASDs. He has alot of SALT input per week which is practised every day in school. He is explicitly taught social skills. He now plays with the other children on a regular basis and school know that if they see him on his own for the whole duration of a breaktime that they have to step in and ask him if he wants to join in and he has to be supported and prompted to be successful in that.

 

I would advise you to contact your local Parent Partnership (details from your local council). They can come with you to any school meetings/IEP meetings and can make sure that targets are SMART.

 

Find out who the Autism Outreach Teacher is, contact them and ask if they know about your child. Our AOT does not need a child to have a diagnosis before she becomes involved, but she does need school to invite her to come in.

 

You could also include in your letter to school that you feel his class next year with two teachers job sharing is going to cause him difficulties. However if he is on SA+ is he already taught in small group work? If so then the TA might be actually having more consistent contact with him. If that is the case then you might want to get assurances that the TA will remain the same throughout the week.

 

Your evidence that your child needs more support will come through IEPs/MEPs (actually as he attends a SULP group it should be Multi Educational Plans - ie. not just academic targets but social ones too). If he doesn't meet the targets then school need to seek outside advice and increase the support or change the approach etc.

 

I would also advise you to contact the National Autistic Society and go to one of their training days about the Special Educational Needs process. You really do need to know and understand what the process is because things will be happening and you will have no idea of it or understand what the schools responsibilities are or whether they are fulfilling them. The more you are aware of and can demonstrate that and ask school what they are doing about it, the more will be put into place. Unfortunately it is those with the knowledge or are prepared to put pen to paper that get the support. You also need to make sure that you always send in letters and confirm any verbal discussions with a follow up letter. That is your only evidence of what you have told them, requested they do or proof of what they have said to you. You may find you need all this as evidence if you ask for an assessment for a Statement.

[beckyjen]

Hi sally just a quick message haven't managed to read your message in detail yet but alot of what you have said had made real sense. Me and my husband have literally been thrown into this with no knowlegde and are feeling a little out of our depth, although we get the odd note from school saying that my son has been involoved in these groups it has never been explained to us what they are or how it is he was placed with them. seems that i have a lot to be getting on with over the weekend.

Thanks for your help will let you know how i get on.

[Sally44]

Believe me, it does take a while to get your head around the whole process and who is involved at what stage and whether they come under 'health' or 'education'. But it will eventually fall into place and begin to make sense.

I would also recommend you get a copy of the Special Educational Needs Code of Practice. That tells you what should be done at each stage of the process and gives alot of useful information about the Statementing process.

Unfortunately when a child is diagnosed the most the parents get is usually an A4 leaflet, which doesn't really cover it. And it is no-ones job to actually explain to parents what the system is. And sometimes those within the system don't even fully understand it or follow it. So try to get clued up. Don't be afraid of asking for explanations and clarification of what is happening. And definately don't expect that things will happen automatically because the truth is that any additional support in terms of approaches/strategies or extra staff input means it costs the school and LEA more money.

Although on this forum there are some parents whose LEA has been brilliant, the majority of experience from parents is that the barest minimum is done with some LEAs resorting to dirty tricks. But when you know your rights (and your child's rights) you can quote them line and verse of the Code of Practice and that does make a difference.

[lsuddick]

Hi,

Just a quick note about your problems! DO THIS:-

 

1. Listen to Sally44. Follow her suggestions to the letter. She advised me last week and after nine years of this we appear to have won!

 

2. Contact the local Autism Outreach Team through the local council. They can help!

 

3. Contact the local Parent Partnerships office through local council. They can help.

 

4. Submit a claim for Disability Living Allowance & Carer's Allowance. To do this use the local Benefits Advice Office. It amounts to about £450 a month and if passed it will be back dated to the date of your first claim. It is not charity, it is your right. I use ours so Mike can follow his go-kart hobby/obsession.

 

5. Finally, you seem very nice and reasonable. Stop it and start kicking some ###### and banging some tables.

 

The powers that be have the excuse of a six week break coming up. Get on your bike NOW!!!!

 

DO AS SALLY SAYS AND DO IT NOW!

 

Good Luck!

[Sally44]

Hi,

Just a quick note about your problems! DO THIS:-

 

1. Listen to Sally44. Follow her suggestions to the letter. She advised me last week and after nine years of this we appear to have won!

 

2. Contact the local Autism Outreach Team through the local council. They can help!

 

3. Contact the local Parent Partnerships office through local council. They can help.

 

4. Submit a claim for Disability Living Allowance & Carer's Allowance. To do this use the local Benefits Advice Office. It amounts to about £450 a month and if passed it will be back dated to the date of your first claim. It is not charity, it is your right. I use ours so Mike can follow his go-kart hobby/obsession.

 

5. Finally, you seem very nice and reasonable. Stop it and start kicking some ###### and banging some tables.

 

The powers that be have the excuse of a six week break coming up. Get on your bike NOW!!!!

 

DO AS SALLY SAYS AND DO IT NOW!

 

Good Luck!

 

 

Although I am happy that things have made a positive turn for the better, I agree with Bid that you always need to follow everything up in writing and also keep pushing to ensure it happens.

 

I also wanted to say that I am not a professional in these matters at all. The moderators have alot more knowledge than I do. I am just a parent like most others on this forum. So please don't take my posts as being totally infallible. I would hate to feel responsible for a parent taking a course of action that did not work out.

 

[Mad cat lady]

Just to let you know that my son had 2 teachers last year (job share) we also didn't think he would cope with it but actually he did once he got to know which teacher he had on what days he was absolutely fine with it. We went with the "if you don't like one teacher, at least you only have her half the time" approach".

 

Swimming, again we were lucky in that there is a special needs school near my sons mainstream school and he had lessons there while the other children went to the big pool. It may be school policy that all children go however if it is likely to cause him stress (a recognised medical condition btw) then a letter from your GP or other medical professional your son is under (like OT) should be enough for him to opt out of this. After all if a child has a broken leg they would not expect him to do PE although school policy is that all children do PE.

 

It has taken 6 years of fighting with our school before they realised he did actually have difficulties other than just learning we have been put through hell with the authorities when all that was needed was for them to listen to what we were saying and to see for themselves that we were right rather than just say its school policy and all children will follow it. A little bit of understanding can go a long way, and now that they deal with my son differently than the other children(where necessary) their job has actually become easier.

 

I don't understand the english system so can't advise what you should do, but you should definitely find someone who can help you speak to the school, I hope you get something sorted out.

 

MCL

[beckyjen]

Hi all

First of all thank you for your support and advise i have found it more than helpful and has gave me a clear picture for what it is i need to be focusing on next.

i have spoken with his teacher and she is now writing up a report which will include any assesments that have been done this school year also groups hes attended, progress etc etc ...

i have also attended a local support group who may i add were brilliant also very supportive and helpful, we will be attending a number of organised events with them in the near future and i'm hoping that my son will make some new friends.

i've found out the numbers for our local parent partnership and also NAS so i will be spending tomorrow when i have some quite lol phoning them and getting some advise.

(mad cat lady) i've spoken to his current teacher about our concerns over the job share and she has promised me that she will provide me with photos and a time table of working hours so i can make a chart for liam to see what teacher he has and what activities he needs to prepare for.

hopefully i will have time to come on line later and fill you all in, in ore detail but once again thank you for your help and i will keep you informed of our progress.

 

[cmuir]

Hi

 

In Scotland a child doesn't need to have an official diagnosis before receiving support. My son received 1-2-1 full time support pre-diagnosis. When a child presents as having difficulties, behavioural, learning, etc, they're assigned an educational psychologist. It's their job to assess the child and make recommendations about support and seek external agency input if required. Of course, all sounds good in theory, but that's not the way it always works.

 

Point I wanted to make is that, there are various acts (in Scotland, it's the Support for Learning Act 2004) which are designed to ensure that a child receives the support that they need and that's irrespective of whether they have a diagnosis.

 

I'd enlist the support of healthcare professionals to back you up and share their findings. They school are then duty bound to act upon that and start providing support. Problem is that in a lot of cases a child often presents differently at school because they want to fit in or the fixed timetable system works for them, etc that by the time they're home, they've had enough and vent at their parents. That's well documented by psychiatrists, etc and doesn't mean that the child doesn't have problems.

 

Best of luck with things.

 

Caroline.