scoops Report post Posted July 13, 2009 Just thought I'd say hi! I am a 42 year old male who has suspected for a long time that I may have aspergers. I have not been diagnosed, so I suppose I could be a complete charlatan! I've done a bit of research on the condition and have taken a couple of online tests in order to guage both my "Autistic Quotient" and my "Emotional Intelligence" No doubt these tests would have bone fide clinicians tearing their hair out. However, taking it as only a guideline, I always score highly on these tests (high is not good). I have recently separated from my wife of 15 years, as she has said that we can't communicate, something I've always found difficult and things to be fair had got pretty awful, however, I am not looking for a diagnosis of AS for my marital problems, I recognise I have a lot of issues to deal with, something that I'm not good at. I think to have got to my age and coped with AS (Indeed if I do suffer from AS) has required me to make up a lot of my own coping strategies, strategies that I often don't think have been the best solution. Anyway enough of me, I'm going to make an appointment to see my doctor, who hopefully will be sympathetic, as I believe his own son unfortunately has dyspraxia. Kind Regards. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tjw Report post Posted July 13, 2009 hi scoops welcome to the forum i hope you go well at the dr, i have a 6 yr old dx with asd and maybe dysprxia, sorry to hear about your slipt up with your wife takecare theresa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NickyB Report post Posted July 13, 2009 hello scoops and welcome Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tally Report post Posted July 13, 2009 Hello, and welcome to the forum. The online tests are not completely useless and can be a useful guide. Getting a formal diagnosis can be very difficult for adults, so it's a good idea to go to your GP prepared with reasons why a diagnosis for your difficulties would be helpful. It's common for adults with undiagnosed AS to develop coping strategies. Not all of them are helpful, and some can mask the condition. But even without diagnosis, if you hear about strategies which might help, it is worth trying them. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
scoops Report post Posted July 13, 2009 Hello, and welcome to the forum. The online tests are not completely useless and can be a useful guide. Getting a formal diagnosis can be very difficult for adults, so it's a good idea to go to your GP prepared with reasons why a diagnosis for your difficulties would be helpful. It's common for adults with undiagnosed AS to develop coping strategies. Not all of them are helpful, and some can mask the condition. But even without diagnosis, if you hear about strategies which might help, it is worth trying them. Yes, I can imagine getting a formal diagnosis could be difficult for many reasons, not least because I sort of know how I should be answering the questions, by mapping it to the expected responses. As I said, I've developed my own strategies, and most people don't say well he's obviously HFA, generally, it's more that they don't warm to me, see me as a bit odd / unfriendly. I've often had the "well he's charming" ... a coping strategy... something that should come naturally, but little do they know just how much effort I'm putting in! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bid Report post Posted July 13, 2009 Welcome to the forum Bid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lifevoyager Report post Posted July 21, 2009 Hi Scoops and welcome. I am a 39 year old female attempting to get a diagnosis, it is a bit scary when you read up on Aspergers and can relate so much to it. Good luck with your doctor, may be worth asking him to refer you for a pscychology assessment for a possible diagnosis. I found it helpful to write notes on what I perceived as symptoms. He may also ask you why you want a diagnosis and what this would mean to you- something to think about. All the best! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
scoops Report post Posted July 22, 2009 Hi Scoops and welcome. I am a 39 year old female attempting to get a diagnosis, it is a bit scary when you read up on Aspergers and can relate so much to it. Good luck with your doctor, may be worth asking him to refer you for a pscychology assessment for a possible diagnosis. I found it helpful to write notes on what I perceived as symptoms. He may also ask you why you want a diagnosis and what this would mean to you- something to think about. All the best! Thanks, I've known for a long time summat was up! Been to see the doctor, and he is happy to refer me. It was a good idea to go armed though, his initial reaction, was, I really don't think so. But with a little ammunition, it wasn't that difficult. I understand your problems, adult AS people (bear in mind I don't have a DX) are often extremely good at masking their symptoms and do not present well as an HFA. Fingers crossed for both you and me both, I will get to the bottom of it this time. I'm fed up of being odd, and would dearly like to know that I'm a bit odd, rather than this hell that I and of course others go through. Best of luck. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
something_different Report post Posted July 23, 2009 hello and welcome! I also have traits of AS, but not brave enough to seek help/advice/a dx. So I am sort of here but not really belonging as I can't possibly say I have AS when I do not have a dx of it. So I am just the weirdo lurker who happens to be posting a bit more than I used to! I do not fit into any category, NT or AS, because I am too weird to fit in with NT and no dx to fit in with AS. I often question if I should be here since I do not really belong. So I am just the weirdo on this forum as i am not seeking a dx so will continue to be the weirdo lurker. Best of luck to you though, and hope u manage to get some answers. SD x ps sorry went on a little there! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nellie Report post Posted July 23, 2009 SD, <'> You have been here for almost 4 years. You are you, a respected and valued member of this forum, you don't need a diagnosis to be here! Welcome scoops Nellie xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bid Report post Posted July 23, 2009 hello and welcome! I also have traits of AS, but not brave enough to seek help/advice/a dx. So I am sort of here but not really belonging as I can't possibly say I have AS when I do not have a dx of it. So I am just the weirdo lurker who happens to be posting a bit more than I used to! I do not fit into any category, NT or AS, because I am too weird to fit in with NT and no dx to fit in with AS. I often question if I should be here since I do not really belong. So I am just the weirdo on this forum as i am not seeking a dx so will continue to be the weirdo lurker. Best of luck to you though, and hope u manage to get some answers. SD x ps sorry went on a little there! You have just as much right as anyone to be here SD! <'> Bid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
something_different Report post Posted July 23, 2009 thanx bid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
scoops Report post Posted July 23, 2009 Hi all, had a bit of a down day today, anyone else have days like this, no real reason, should have been a good day but just felt blurrgh! all day. I hope everyone else had a good one. Why do I get occasional days like this? Perhaps everyone does? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LordGorse Report post Posted July 23, 2009 Hi all, had a bit of a down day today, anyone else have days like this, no real reason, should have been a good day but just felt blurrgh! all day. I hope everyone else had a good one. Why do I get occasional days like this? Perhaps everyone does? Yeah, today's been like that for me, too. Not sure what, if anything, causes it; perhaps some negative thoughts slipping in somewhere that we're not quite aware of? I think sometimes I have bad dreams that I don't quite remember, but affect me subconciously. Maybe next time you have a "down" day try writing down what's going through your mind? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
scoops Report post Posted July 23, 2009 Yeah, today's been like that for me, too. Not sure what, if anything, causes it; perhaps some negative thoughts slipping in somewhere that we're not quite aware of? I think sometimes I have bad dreams that I don't quite remember, but affect me subconciously. Maybe next time you have a "down" day try writing down what's going through your mind? Think maybe mind was caused by total insomnia last night. Didn't sleep at all. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MOSEY Report post Posted July 23, 2009 Hi Scoops! Nice to meet ya! Hope your day has improved Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
scoops Report post Posted August 12, 2009 My still just wife, thinks that I fit more of a Schitzoid Personaility Disorder pattern. I've had a look at some of the information, and I think it seems to fit, but a lot of the AS stuff fits as well. I'm beginning to think I'm a complete fruitcake now. Sigh, guess I should wait for the professional diagnosis, whenever that is. Confusing, baffling and troubling times, not sure I wanted to open this can of worms now. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
scoops Report post Posted October 18, 2009 Well, I had my appointment with the shrink er sorry trick cyclist, and he reckons I'm good to go, if a little geeky, depressed, and universally unpopular. I don't know what to think now, I didn't really want a label but now I don't really know how to explain myself. (I'm not making any sense am I?) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
