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Asperger's partner

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Is there anyone else here with an aspie partner?

If so how often do they change their obsessions?

My hubby changes his about once a year and they have definitely been getting worse of late.

He's had a family tree obsession, a having to be down the pub at a certain time obsession, but his latest thing is Star Trek! He is driving me nuts with it!

Not only does he HAVE to watch it EVERY weekday night (either from 7 til 8, 8 til 9 on another channel, or both) but he HAS to watch it in the dark! lights off and curtains shut! I keep telling him it won't do his already poor eyesight any good but to no avail - he says he cannot bear reflections on the screen.

It's really winding me up because his whole evening revolves around it. whatever we are doing HAS to stop when it comes on and he won't even respond to our children when he is watching it let alone me! No-one else then can use the front room, so I can't play the piano either. I have to answer the phone and sound a totasl twit when I say sorry he can't come to the phone he's watching star trek!

If he tapes it he still has to watch it so he doesn't gain anything, and woe-betide all of us if I dare suggest he misses it.

 

I am finding it really tough at the moment tho but he just can't see why I am so upset by it. I thought we were a family but this obsession seems to have taken over. I feel as if we both work all day but I still have to be there for the kids as he is unavailable so I'm tired too as he won't share responsibilities.

anyone relate?

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How about talking to him when he is calm and not watching tv to try to suss things out? My husband who as far as I know is not Aspie, has obsession, they include the Beatles, the Prisonner and old trains. But then I have habits that get on everyone's nerves at home so we sort of negotiate!

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It's not really fair for him to commandeer the living room for 1-2 hours every day, and leave you to look after the children by yourself. Have you made it very clear that you don't like it and can't manage?

 

Maybe it would help to write down what you expect of him in the evenings - and ask him to write what he expects of you too so it doesn't seem like an attack on him. Then you can go through it and agree on what you think is reasonable, and then look at what times are free for Star Trek and piano playing.

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