hi newbie

[rachel5]

hi

 

my name is rachel i am married to jon and have 5 wonderful children, on the 11th of this month jacob as diagnosed with aspergers, (not even sure if thats spelt right lol) he is 4, we face daily battles just trying to get the basic things done i have no family support other than my husband, i guess i'm just after talking to ppl who know what i'm going through

 

rachel

[rachel5]

is no one gunna say hi lol

[billabong]

Hi Rachel

 

Welcome to the forum! I don't have children so can't honestly empathise with you there, however I know how isolated life can be. It's not really like that on the forum, honestly! I'm sure there will be plenty of advice, support and encouragement coming. Hang on in there, gal! All the best and <'> from Billabong

[justine1]

Hi Rachel

 

Sorry nobody replied Welcome to the forum <'>

 

I am a single mum to four boys, two of them are on the spectrum,Dan (4) and Sam (7) Dan currently lives with my ex (father of all four boys)as he was unhappy with me and he is now a very happy little boy.

 

Sam goes to an ASD unit attached to mainstream,and is doing much better than he was a year ago.

 

My eldest Josh is gifted(academically 3 years advanced) and my youngest Elijah is just a cute little cheeky chops.

 

The group is very great and supportive. I come here for a moan and advice and try my best to help others if I can,though I am still new to things myself.

 

<'>

[JsMum]

Hi Rachel.

 

I thought I would come and say Hi too, sorry not many have replied, my own internet was down the whole weekend.

 

How is school? Does your son recieve any additional support?

 

I attend my local ASD/ADHD support groups in my area, these are good place to recieve additional support so have a look out in your area for any parent support groups, in some areas they are in the day in a local school, some are evenings which can place childcare restrictions however I recieved Night sitter for my son who was his sessional worker so I could attend my local groups.

 

Another place for great information is National Autistic Society and if you become a member you recieve a magazine called communication which has helpful advise in too.

 

What advise would you like at the moment, you said any Task is a problem, which tasks are causing the problem, Dressing, Eating, playing?

 

I use visual prompts and have a visual timetable this helps a lot, National Autistic Society do HELP programmes, a great day course that helps parents of ASD children to put in stratagies and advise so recommend one of these.

 

Welcome to the forum.

 

JsMumx

[rachel5]

thanks for the replies i'm full of questions you'll be sick of me before you know it lol

 

 

rachel

[rachel5]

hi JsMum

 

at the moment everything is a battle with jacob, wearing clothes eating walking going out thie list goes on and on i think my biggest is his biting he bites harry the youngest and its awful everytime harry goes nr him jacob targets him hes currently sporting 4 bites in the last 2 days

 

rachel

[JsMum]

My son is a J too, 13 now though, thankfully the biting stage has stopped unless he is been restrained!

 

With the biting, what happens before he bites?

 

During and After, How do you react to his biting?

 

A great look at behaviour is a ABC it looks at behaviour sperficially and it also addresses any consequences and it gives good indicators to why he could be biting in the first place.

 

http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/understanding-behaviour/behaviour-guidelines.aspx abc pdf form on the bottom click it and it will let you see it.

 

More info here on Biting.

 

http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/understanding-behaviour/challenging-behaviour/challenging-behaviour-in-children-with-an-asd.aspx

 

http://www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/understanding-behaviour/challenging-behaviour/biting.aspx

 

for me, I give J warnings about his tasks, I tell him before he has to do something and give him time to process the instruction/task, due to his processing impairments I have to give him more time do things, and the warning helps him prepare him and lets him cope with the change.

 

on NAS website there is loads on challenging behaviour and ways to look at supporting the child with ASD needs. so do have a look, is there any Autism outreach workers in your area that could look at stratagies, also Sure start, if you have them in your area.

 

Another great source of support is Contact A Family.

 

In some areas there is outreach workers also.

 

This link is thier booklet on challenging behaviour too.

 

http://www.cafamily.org.uk/pdfs/behaviour.pdf

 

another great advise I recieved from others here is to keep Communications Minimum in times of challenging behaviour and be spersific to what you want your son to do.

 

JsMumx

[Kathryn]

Welcome to the forum Rachel.

 

K x

[rachel5]

hi JsMum

 

to be honest i'm not sure what always sparks it, sometimes it can be if H is trying to play with J and his trains and J will say leave me alone as soon as i hear that i remove H as i know next step is a bite other times H can be doing nothing concerning J,J gets in a crab and then seeks out H, i have also noticed that if he gets over stimulated he'll be hard to calm down which again means poor H gets the brunt of it. I'm going to look at the links later thank you

 

rachel

[JsMum]

hi JsMum

 

to be honest i'm not sure what always sparks it, sometimes it can be if H is trying to play with J and his trains and J will say leave me alone as soon as i hear that i remove H as i know next step is a bite other times H can be doing nothing concerning J,J gets in a crab and then seeks out H, i have also noticed that if he gets over stimulated he'll be hard to calm down which again means poor H gets the brunt of it. I'm going to look at the links later thank you

 

rachel

I recommend a little chill out area for your J, that is only his little area and no one bothers him, it could be a little pop up tent in the living room corner or a hallway, or a corner with bean bags an a playmat, basically it is Js area and noone is allowed in it, this gives your son some space and time out, my J is an only child but when he has friends over they can sometimes feel left out as J doesnt always wants to play, so I have said to his friends that sometimes J needs some time out and to leave him alone for a short period and then he will join in when he is ready to be involved. I think it takes a lot out of our children when interacting all the time, so they need little recovery periods.

 

Js friends now except it when J is solitary on his PC or LAPTOP or wants to just chill out watching myth busters and be in something that is predictable, so his friends just amuse themselves for a short period and then before long there all on the trampoline and running around again with J.

 

Yes my J is also similair too when he is over stimulated it is alot harder for him to take self control, we have a sensory room now though this is out dated for his needs, but he needs a calming place to come back down again, we do relaxation techneques and in the evenings he listens to relaxation CDs, and breathing techneques, breath in for six seconds, slowly breath out for six seconds, this really helps J a lot to have someone talk throw the exercise.

 

I hope you dont mind the advise, if so just tell me to shut up.

 

JsMumx

[Beebee]

hi

 

my name is rachel i am married to jon and have 5 wonderful children, on the 11th of this month jacob as diagnosed with aspergers, (not even sure if thats spelt right lol) he is 4, we face daily battles just trying to get the basic things done i have no family support other than my husband, i guess i'm just after talking to ppl who know what i'm going through

 

rachel

Hi Rachel....welcome to the forum.

Im a mum of two children...15 year old ds diagnosed with AS in July and 10 year old dd NT. I also work in education, with special needs children.

It's a good place to come for advise and to talk with other's who know what your going through.

Bee