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      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   06/04/2017

      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   Depression and other mental health difficulties are common amongst people on the autistic spectrum and their carers.   People who are affected by general mental health difficulties are encouraged to receive and share information, support and advice with other forum members, though it is important to point out that this exchange of information is generally based on personal experience and opinions, and is not a substitute for professional medical help.   There is a list of sources of mental health support here: <a href="http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=18801" target="_blank">Mental Health Resources link</a>   People may experience a more serious crisis with their mental health and need urgent medical assistance and advice. However well intentioned, this is not an area of support that the forum can or should be attempting to offer and we would urge members who are feeling at risk of self-harm or suicide to contact either their own GP/health centre, or if out of hours contact NHS Direct on 0845 4647 or to call emergency services 999.   We want to reassure members that they have our full support in offering and seeking advice and information on general mental health issues. Members asking for information in order to help a person in their care are seeking to empower both themselves and those they represent, and we would naturally welcome any such dialogue on the forum.   However, any posts which are deemed to contain inference of personal intent to self-harm and/or suicide will be removed from the forum and that person will be contacted via the pm system with advice on where to seek appropriate help.   In addition to the post being removed, if a forum member is deemed to indicate an immediate risk to themselves, and are unable to be contacted via the pm system, the moderating team will take steps to ensure that person's safety. This may involve breaking previous confidentiality agreements and/or contacting the emergency services on that person's behalf.   Sometimes posts referring to self-harm do not indicate an immediate risk, but they may contain material which others find inappropriate or distressing. This type of post will also be removed from the public forum at the moderator's/administrator's discretion, considering the forum user base as a whole.   If any member receives a PM indicating an immediate risk and is not in a position (or does not want) to intervene, they should forward the PM to the moderating team, who will deal with the disclosure in accordance with the above guidelines.   We trust all members will appreciate the reasoning behind these guidelines, and our intention to urge any member struggling with suicidal feelings to seek and receive approproiate support from trained and experienced professional resources.   The forum guidelines have been updated to reflect the above.   Regards,   The mod/admin team
Glasgow-Laura

Hey i'm new & looking for advice x

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Hey i'm Laura i'm currently 21 and i live my partner who's 28 and suffers from Aspergers syndrome. he's never been properly diagnosed before i met him. but currently is awaiting to see about doing so next month. anyways i'm basically here for help and advice on how to deal with living with a person who suffers from this illness as probably all of who read this will understand its not the easiest thing in the world by a long mile. i'm currently pregnant with my partners baby which is due next april.x

 

if anyone out there can help me and give advice on living with this i'd be ever so grateful. as sometimes i feel like i'm totally alone :(

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Mumble   

Hi welcome to the forum :)

 

There's probably others out there who are better placed to reply and I'm far too tired to type anything coherent right now, I just wanted to correct your terminology - AS is not an illness, it is a pervasive developmental disorder. Illness implies cure, which isn't possible with AS.

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Well i'm 24 years old and a male so i can tell you what he might be going through. First of all i can't always get accross to people how i feel and sometimes people really have to dig to get it out me. I was only diagnosed with a mild form but mixed in with my depression i had it can be a lonely scary world. Thankfully i'm improving and better but if you love him you have to stick with him. Find out what he enjoys, what i enjoy is music and i'm a rising songwriter, this for me is my salvation and my release, i sometimes think if i'd still be here if it wasn't for my music. I also know an insane amount of people with aspergers who are either succesful artists/musicians and involved with the arts in general.

 

For me people with aspergers are some of the most loyal you'll ever meet too, sometimes i lose track of what's important but with the right help people like us can get our lives on the right tracks just like anyone else.

 

Like mumble stated this isn't an illness, it's a difference. You also need to look for his positives as it isn't all negative like some people perceive. I would never change from the person i am, if people don't accept me for me it doesnt bother me anymore, people with aspergers are loyal to the max

 

Anxiety and panic attacks are another issue but learning to relax is absolutely paramount

I personally practice tai chi everyday now and run every other day 2.5 miles which helps my mental state, maybe if he isn't allready doing something like that he could start releasing some tension by doing so? I really didn't know what to put here if i'm being honest but i replied as i'm near enough the same age as him so maybe it'll help him.

Edited by Goldenben

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allyd   

Hey i'm Laura i'm currently 21 and i live my partner who's 28 and suffers from Aspergers syndrome. he's never been properly diagnosed before i met him. but currently is awaiting to see about doing so next month. anyways i'm basically here for help and advice on how to deal with living with a person who suffers from this illness as probably all of who read this will understand its not the easiest thing in the world by a long mile. i'm currently pregnant with my partners baby which is due next april.x

 

if anyone out there can help me and give advice on living with this i'd be ever so grateful. as sometimes i feel like i'm totally alone :(

 

Hi Laura, sorry i`m a bit behind with the forum- been off with the flu ! Goldenben has given you great advise ! How are things ? I agree with the other replies- it may seem like an illness but it is difference ! and hey, its good to be different.

 

There are books advising people in relationships with aspergers men, if you go to amazon books take a look and see which one you might find useful- if you get stuck let me know. If you can try to see what makes the day good for your partner and what makes a bad day- its not that different from all of us really- we like to avoid the things that make a negative day ! There are lots of things to do with communication that aspergers struggle with- I am a female with asperegers and although i am 49, i still need people to be clear about what they are saying- say what you mean, and mean what you say. there`s no point in people saying one thing and expecting us to react in a certain way- if you really meant something else! Yes, it can be complicated but if you can get some books they should help. Tony Attwood has written very good books on aspergers syndrome- and he tries to cover most things.

 

believe me, you are not alone ! If you can get good talking time and space with your partner that is a good help, its when we really don`t understand whats going on or whats expected of us that problems come up ! I am married for the second time- for 7 years now- and my husband still gets things wrong ! Just by not talking to me, or not listening, or not taking time to explain things.

 

There are lots of other stuff that affects aspergers syndrome (AS)- sensory difficulties- Tony attwood touches on these also. Just start at the beginning, read up some stuff and go from there, try to understand your partner and what I`ve outlined above. With a baby on the way you have alot to look forward to, becoming a parent was the best thing in the world for me.

I hope this helps but if there are specific things you want to talk through just email back,

 

regards, allyd

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>:D<<'> >:D< Hiya Laura. We are new to the Forum aswell and we live in Glasgow!! :thumbs: Anytime you need a chat or support then don't hesitate to contact us ok. AS is another 'normal way of life' is us NT that have the problems :wacko:

See our article on 'relationships' it will help :D

pola and dobie

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