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fluffyblueberry

Impact of AS Diagnosis

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Hi, I have no idea about the answers to these questions - but I feel there is a prejudice there about AS.

I have two children, one who is one the spectrum.

As a family, we have long discussed the possibility that one day, we would like to adopt a child.

Maybe one with additional needs also.

I have also considered registering as a childminder recently because there is no childcare currently available in my area, (apparently) and I feel many childminders have a problem taking on an autistic child, if they have no experience, (although my child is a passive non-aggressive sort). Also, I'm looking to go into social work and childminding, especially things like respite care, which I'm interested in too, will provide me with relevant experience. I have recently considered seeking diagnosis for AS, because I want to share my experiences and help other women. I feel a diagnosis in childhood would have saved me a lot of soul searching and suffering - I would have made quite different choices.

 

My concern is, if I get a diagnosis of AS:

-would this in any way impact on me being able to adopt in future?

- would it impact on me getting registered as a childminder?

 

In the second case, they require the doctor to say whether you are "fit" for the job, you have to disclose any mental health issues etc - for example, I do suffer quite high anxiety and have bouts of depression. That said, I am not on medication for the anxiety and I haven't been on antidepressants for five years - these things are crippling to the point that I can't be a mother, (I have two children) or that I can't look after another child perfectly well. A lot of my anxiety is internal, I don't verbalise and often will appear to be totally ok.

 

Anyway, if anyone has any idea about this - I'd appreciate help! :)

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I work with extremely vulnerable children and young people with learning difficulties and complex medical needs, and I have a dx of AS.

 

That said, I had already been working there for a couple of years when I had my assessment...but having said that, I was promoted around the same time with my line manager knowing I had been referred.

 

I have put my dx down on various HR forms, and twice during in-house training I've had to ask for reasonable adjustments because of my AS...once to do some 'role play' out of the main training room because I couldn't process things as there was too much noise, and just this summer I had to ask to be excused the 'falls response' in First Aid because it involved lying on the floor while someone felt me all over!! :ph34r:

 

So personally I've never had any problems in my situation.

 

Bid :)

Edited by bid

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Hi

I dont have experience with either scenarios but I really do not think it will have an impact on you adopting, so many children need the stability of a home/family and I think given you got two kids already you fit that description.They scutinise prospective parents very well but its the same process for everyone. I watched a programme last week about a lady with downs syndrome who has adopted 8 kids all with special needs(downs syndrome and autism) it was just amazing!

 

As for childminding, I know from recent experience how hard it is to find childcare and especially someone willing to look after a child with autism, I have had to move because my childminder refused to look after Sam after 3 weeks!! My family are now helping out but its not ideal!

I dont think you would have to disclose that you have asd to parents, unless it affected the way you provide care. It isnt a mental illness so it is your choice really.

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My ex-husband and I were considering adopting. WHether you adopt through the Local Authority or a private adoption agency, it is the LA who carry out the checks and approve potential adoptive parents. I made some initial enquiries with my LA and they replied that they will never approve a person with Asperger's as an adoptive parent.

 

There are very thorough checks including into your medical history. Your mental health history is going to raise a lot of questions and may already be a barrier to adopting.

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i was also maybe thinking of adopting later on in life and when figured life skills etc and settled down sorted myself but again i have long MH background/past/history that may come back to haunt me too then if that is case ... my nan ( my dad's mum) fostered her grandkids and also fostered then feel in complete love to adopted a little baby which now my auntie even though not blood related i'm really close to her! my nan loved doing it! she had her house and hands full that's for sure plenty noise etc always going on but she wouldn't had it any other way! it's shame they dismiss us because of A.S is that discrimation i know come down hard on smokers , obese people now is this the same situation for not accepting offer of adopting/fostering? do they think if had MH probs you're at risk to the child and because these child/ren have complex needs of their own could be too much pressure strain on us with already having A.S to deal,manage,cope with is that the real reason behind it maybe? i love to adopt autistic girl/boy think be great challenge to see how blossom come out their shells and what achievements strides personal steps could be made ....

 

XKLX

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i was also maybe thinking of adopting later on in life and when figured life skills etc and settled down sorted myself but again i have long MH background/past/history that may come back to haunt me too then if that is case ... my nan ( my dad's mum) fostered her grandkids and also fostered then feel in complete love to adopted a little baby which now my auntie even though not blood related i'm really close to her! my nan loved doing it! she had her house and hands full that's for sure plenty noise etc always going on but she wouldn't had it any other way! it's shame they dismiss us because of A.S is that discrimation i know come down hard on smokers , obese people now is this the same situation for not accepting offer of adopting/fostering? do they think if had MH probs you're at risk to the child and because these child/ren have complex needs of their own could be too much pressure strain on us with already having A.S to deal,manage,cope with is that the real reason behind it maybe? i love to adopt autistic girl/boy think be great challenge to see how blossom come out their shells and what achievements strides personal steps could be made ....

 

XKLX

 

 

I think it's a real shame if there IS a problem. Of course, even with AS, there is a spectrum...and I understand that some people with AS may not make great adoptive parents, (just like people in the regular population). But I hope they judge the individual and don't just see the disability. There are so many children who need adopting...I think I'd be much more prepared to take on a child with ASD because I have experience and I do consider myself a good parent, despite any struggles I may have. I don't think they should put up too many barriers to stop people adopting just because they don't fit some idealistic stereotype - I hope it's not like that - even parents who appear "perfect" may not be that way at all. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. I just hope they'll be able to see my strengths.

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Wow... NEVER? They actually replied never?...

 

That's interesting.

 

I was wondering, (before I considered I had AS)...whether having an autistic child would also prevent me from adopting? I thought maybe they'd think he would take up too much of the attention/a stressful environment for the adoptive child etc etc? But I haven't enquired about it.

 

 

My ex-husband and I were considering adopting. WHether you adopt through the Local Authority or a private adoption agency, it is the LA who carry out the checks and approve potential adoptive parents. I made some initial enquiries with my LA and they replied that they will never approve a person with Asperger's as an adoptive parent.

 

There are very thorough checks including into your medical history. Your mental health history is going to raise a lot of questions and may already be a barrier to adopting.

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Yes, I was told never. Different LAs have different policies.

Even if you do not plan to adopt at the moment, you could always make some tentative enquiries now.

The adoption process is very long, so you may wish to even start the process before you are quite ready.

 

Your mental health history is likely to be an issue since you are not fully recovered. Although you may be doing better and have been able to come off the medications, the fact that you are still suffering from anxiety and bouts of depression and is something they would be very concerned about.

 

Having an autistic child already will definitely be something they want to discuss, but it could be a very positive thing. You already understand the difficulties of raising an autistic child and presumably have developed coping strategies. You already have a network in place to support you with raising an autistic child. You already know where to seek support.

 

I know a couple whose 3rd child was born with physical disabilities, and they went on to provide temporary respite care for children with disabilities and eventually adopted a 4th child with severe physical and learning disabilities. So having a disabled child already does not have to be a bad thing.

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Sorry I did not realise you had depression until Tally mentioned it, it would be taken quite seriously.You could always wait until later on in life when your own children have left home,not sure how old you or your children are. You may need time to understand yourself and your needs, as a parent we tend to focus on the kids not ourselves so maybe as your children get older you can start giving yourself more time and this may help with your anxiety and depression.

 

Again depending on the age of your ASD child, you never know what the future may hold, some ASD children become independent etc at an average age others can be dependent for many years.

 

I have always wanted to adopt as my mum was a foster parent and I grew up with many different children and its made me who I am today.She also adopted a boy aged 10 who once he reached 14 decided he wanted to go back to his biological mum and it was very painful experience. It hasnt put me off though.However I know with four kids of my own and no career yet, I need to sort my life first. My goal is to achieve my nursing and get my eldest into medicine at uni and then see my situation and may adopt then, so at least another 10years to go!

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Did you ask them "why" their policy was never? That seems crazy... every individual with AS is different. The thing *I* would be most concerned about is the common mental health issues that tend to come with AS, such as anxiety depression etc and to look at those, fair enough, I understand that - but just to say they won't consider someone on the very basis they have AS, sounds as though it comes from total ignorance of the condition. It's like, they've read the list of "traits" or possible symptoms and decided: a good parent cannot have these traits, therefore they cannot be considered. I wonder if this will change as awareness of AS grows? Plenty of people deemed "successful" have AS, plenty of fantastic parents have AS, it just seems outrageous that someone could be turned down for adoption for that reason alone.

 

We wouldn't consider going down the adoption road yet because we have two young boys - we were thinking five, seven years down the line, (to actually have one that is...so, we'd start the process a long time before that).

 

Maybe things will be different then. I'll certainly contact my LA and see what they say.

 

:)

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Hi,

 

I've had bouts of depression most of my life since childhood and the anxiety has always been there too - although, in the last couple of years the anxiety is more prevelant and the depression has taken a back seat. That said, the depression was taken away totally by st Johns Wart and I haven't had depression since my son was born, (20 months ago) I think largely because I'm still breastfeeding, which can help. But as soon as I stop, I'll be back on the st johns wart again. I think the anxiety is just part of who I am unfortunately, I can't imagine not experiencing it - but it's all internal, I still manage to function and get on with things and no one is the wiser - unless I say something. But I'm on no medication for it, so wouldn't they just class that as mild? I don't see how suffering from anxiety is a good reason to turn you down. The only reason they would know is that I have mentioned the anxiety at the doctors a couple of times - but I haven'd had therapy for it or anything.

 

My son with ASD is only four. He is high functioning - in that, he's attending a mainstream school and expected to get on and improve, his main problem is that he has a speech delay. He's at about a two and a half year old stage - speech and language wise...but more advanced in things like, numbers/puzzles etc... But we have no idea of course, how he will be in the future. We couldn't wait that long before we adopted though, my husband is quite a bit older than me.

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There will be criteria for potential adoptive parents.

Biological parents do not go through any screening procedure and can be criminals, addicts, sexual preditors etc. Until quite recently children of parents who were addicted to drugs were not automatically flagged up by social services and screened for potential neglect or safety issues.

 

But, also, the LEA has a responsibility for placing a child with a potential life long placement in a safe environment with capable parents. Although being on the spectrum would not necessarily mean that every such person was unable of bringing up children (because many on the spectrum do), I can understand why having a diagnosis might cause a problem.

 

In the same way I can see how some employers might decide not to employ a person based solely on them having a diagnosis without even having met them. I think it would be different if it were an employee that sought a diagnosis after joining a company.

 

I think that adults have to consider and weight up what the possible gains and losses could be of receiving a diagnosis. It maybe that those with greater needs might access support (which is rather thin on the ground), whereas others who were more capable might find it a personal help, but in other ways an overall hinderance as well.

 

That is why I initially found it very hard to seek a diagnosis for my son, because I cannot look into a crystal ball and see if that diagnosis (or diagnoses, as he now has a number of them), is going to be a help or hinderance to him and the life choices he would like to pursue.

 

Having said that, I don't know what the legal requirement is in whether you would have to 'decare' your AS or ASD diagnosis to any potential employer?

 

With adoption I would have thought they would seek access to medical records? And as AS/ASD is a medical disorder, it would be on your file.

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