AS is mild autism

[kerryt84]

So now I've been diagnosed officially I want to write letters to the people close to me to let them know and educate them about AS. I'm still learning a lot myself and one thing I have heard strong opinions for and against is that AS is mild autism. Now I don't think I agree with this statement but I wanted to hear what other people think to help develop my views and understanding.

 

Thanks in advance, Kerry

[trekster]

i prefer to use the term 'compensatory' for so called mild autism/mild AS. This is more descriptive because it mentions that the person needs to make

a lot of concentrated effort in order to live in this confusing world.

 

If im in shut-down, meltdown, rage or just coming out of any of these modes my autism is more severe.

[KezT]

It is the most untrue and unhelpul definition of AS anyone has ever come up with and it REALLY annoys me

 

AS is high functioning autism, so "mild" in that way - people with AS can walk,talk and interact with the world. However AS itself can range from mild to severe, with mild still meaning major dificulties with everyday life (otherwise there wouldn't have been a dx at all)!

 

All AS means is that the person did not have a speach delay, but is autistic. Mild AS/Autism may only affect some circumstances/issues or the affects may be esily managed, and severe AS/Autism will have an effect on pretty much every aspect/moment of that person's life or the effects may be very difficult to manage

 

My son has severe AS, but because of the stupid belief that AS=mild, I always have to describe him as autistic to others, even professionals who ought to know better!

[kerryt84]

Thanks guys, those are the exact sort of comments I was looking for.

 

In particular KezT I really liked how you explained it. I suppose I would say I have mild Asperger's then, although it can become moderate if I'm feeling really stressed or overwhelmed. Is it ok to explain it like that?

 

So because AS is on the autistic spectrum does that mean that if you have AS then you are autistic?

 

Kerry

[KezT]

Thanks guys, those are the exact sort of comments I was looking for.

 

In particular KezT I really liked how you explained it. I suppose I would say I have mild Asperger's then, although it can become moderate if I'm feeling really stressed or overwhelmed. Is it ok to explain it like that?

 

So because AS is on the autistic spectrum does that mean that if you have AS then you are autistic?

 

Kerry

 

yes and yes:)

[Lilypad]

Hi Kerry

 

My son was diagnosed with ASD this week. I asked them what type of ASD it is and they told me that they don't categorise it anymore (not in my area anyway).

They said that as he is high functioning he may have once been labelled as having Asperger's syndrome but that is exactly the same as High functioning Autism.

 

I think the reason why they are reluctant to use the term Asperger's is because there are alot of prejudices against the term and that if you say that you are autistic, people are generally more understanding.

 

I personally have always believed Asperger's syndrome to be autism as it is medically on the Autistic spectrum...

[RainbowsButterflies]

So now I've been diagnosed officially I want to write letters to the people close to me to let them know and educate them about AS. I'm still learning a lot myself and one thing I have heard strong opinions for and against is that AS is mild autism. Now I don't think I agree with this statement but I wanted to hear what other people think to help develop my views and understanding.

 

Thanks in advance, Kerry

 

 

Aperger's Syndrome is a form of autism. Someone with AS has an IQ over 70 and had no major speech delays - the diagnosis doesn't really say to what extent the autism is 'mild' or 'severe'.

 

I can only speak for myself, but my stress levels really effect how well I cope with things. I also have the double edged sword of being intelligent enough to work things out that NT people do intuitively - again on a good day. I was stunned by some of the things the psychologist picked out at my assessment, which really made me realise - my autism isn't mild, but the way I present my differences to the outside world may be, if that makes sense.

[bid]

I also have the double edged sword of being intelligent enough to work things out that NT people do intuitively - again on a good day.

 

Yep, that's what was said at my dx assessment too...but it can be absolutely exhausting

 

Bid

[BusyLizzie100]

It is the most untrue and unhelpul definition of AS anyone has ever come up with and it REALLY annoys me

 

 

Me too!!

 

Asperger's is a subgroup on the autistic spectrum, it really annoys me how it is often seen as somehow 'different' to autism. A diagnosis still requires the triad of impairments to be present, as in every other subgroup on the autistic spectrum.

 

And NO, it is NOT a mild form of autism. We have a mix in our household, at varying points on the spectrum, and it is most often the one diagnosed with AS - or who fits the AS profile - that experiences the most difficulties day-to-day.

 

 

Lizzie x

[bonbons]

My daughter was diagnosed last year having been admitted to a young persons psychiatric unit for assessment following many behavioural problems both at home and at school. The senco teacher from her (then) high school attended one of her review meetings during this time at which the paediatric psychiatrist explained that she was being assessed for aspergers. I remember watching this teacher shake her head and make notes, and afterwards she said to me that if she did have aspergers syndrome, she would "expect it to be very mild". I later relayed this to the head of the short stay school who taught my daughter during her time there, and who herself had two daughters with AS, and she was furious! She said there is no such thing as mild aspergers as their is nothing mild about the difficulties faced and the impact they can have in her life! Very true!!!

[sesley]

my person is 11 with what is classed as high functioning autism ASD. His challenges are his autism, if its a mild form i don't know,all i know he has certain difficulites and characteristics that make him autistic. I will add he is a full on trying to be social,he chats away to anyone he meets in tescos either staff or other customers,some smile at him and some scurry away,he just is trying to be friendly and does not understand that some people just want to be left alone

[anewman]

While this description has a lot against it, I feel it is probably one of the best ways to describe the condition to NT's, as it emphasises that while you have difficulties interacting - you are not completely mute or sat rocking in a chair all day not interacting with the world at all. I think other ways of trying to describe it would tend to go straight over most NT's heads. NT's are somewhat thick when it comes to understanding that people may be socially different to themselves, and some even tend to interpret people with AS are mentally retarded, when all of us here know this is not the case. The other thing that seems to pop up with very NT NT's is the idea that you should get some treatment or some drug (when none exists and never will).

 

There's a lot said against describing AS as mild autism, but sadly no better alternative appears to be offered here.

 

So... Is it better to describe Aspergers as an autistic spectrum condition characterised by significant difficulties in social interaction, with restricted and repetitive patterns of behaviour and interests - which differs from Autism in that language and cognitive development are normal (description based on Wikipedia). Or as a mild form of autism?

[Boy]

I dislike the term 'mild autism', and prefer just to stick with 'high functioning autism' if people want specifics, or can't quite grasp the fact that autism doesn't mean 'Rain Man'. It also think that using terms that can 'play down' a condition (mild seems to do that, in my opinion, moreso than 'high functioning') can make people with little to no knowledge of autism even more ignorant. For example, I've known people to have the opinion that autism means you're retarded, whilst Asperger's means you're a genius. Both of these opinions are false, of course, and so instead of having people think that Asperger's is 'mild autism' characterised by genius eccentricity, I'd rather they realised that those with Asperger's/HFA actually have (or potentially can have, as we're all different) the exact same problems as those with classic autism, even if it's not always as noticeable. I also think that sometimes people who are higher functioning almost seem to want to apologise for people for having the same diagnosis as people who are 'more disabled', and it's almost like we're saying, "I'm autistic... Oops, sorry! I can talk, and stuff, can't I? I meant that I'm MILDLY autistic. Silly me."

 

And mild compared to what? If we could all literally be placed on a line (in a 'spectrum of severity') we'd only be mild compared to those a lot further left than us. We'd not be mild compared to any who are directly to the left, or any of those to the right of us...

 

With high functioning I think that that explains that there are lots of things I can do that perhaps other autistic people can't do, without making it sound like I have no difficulties. Whereas with 'mild' I think that the problem is, even for someone whose problems are mild-as-far-as-autism-goes, their autism related problems won't be mild compared to someone who doesn't have autism.

[lsw146]

Yep, that's what was said at my dx assessment too...but it can be absolutely exhausting

 

Bid

That's exactly how I see things for my DD she can sort things out but it's such hard work and then when she is exhausted her autism seems more apparent. Still no diagnosis though, being assessed again ( but no formal ASD assessment).

I don't think you can say AS is mild autism I think it is a different expression of social confusion which even amongst the most high functioning must make life challenging. (only commenting from watching and talking with my own daughter)

[littleG]

Kerry

 

My son has been diagnosed with AS (mild).

 

From an extremely SELFLISH and UNCARING point of view, it could be classed as MILD as he can FUNCTION physically,

 

But as a caring, loving mother, I can see the pain that he suffers, it only affects me when I acknowledge my care and love for him.

 

The term MILD is from the outside looking in - not the other way round.

 

When people who care come into your world, they will see that MILD does not have a place.

 

Best of luck and ignore those who can't see in.

 

I read a book about AS and I am sorry I don't know which amongst the many, perhaps some others might. In it there was the following saying which stuck in my mind "Those who mind don't care and those who care don't mind".

 

Be true to yourself and remember that you are God made - with great care and for a reason.

 

x

[smiley1590]

when living daily with A.S it doesn't feel MILD one bit at all!!! feels tiring drainiing to try 'figure out' the 'norm world' i get so annoyed frustrated angry when people say MILD AUTISM maybe MILD to them NOT to me!

[littleG]

I am new to this forum and to the world of AS and I am SO thankful and priviledged that older people with AS are posting here.

 

My son is 8 and I so much want him to know that I am on his side but am still trying to find ways to let him know that I will always be there for him - I do tell him this, but I am not sure how much actually registers.

 

It gives me great comfort to hear from you all as it can be a very lonely road for the person with AS and for those who care - we are all on the same side, but this is not always obvious!

 

Keep posting!

 

x

[chris54]

On my sons diagnosis, it says "High Functioning Autism presenting as Aspergers Syndrome",you can take that to mean whatever you like. It all goes back to the early days of research, two people researching different aspects of what is the same thing.

[dm2010]

When I was first diagnosed I did tell a few people outside the family. Seemed like a good idea at the time but it is something I now regret. It's like being able to see the world only at ultra-violet wavelengths and expecting someone who can see normally to understand your point of view.

 

I take the view that provided I act reasonably and fairly at all times, other people's perceptions of me are their own responsibility, not mine. I am most likely to get on with those who believe "a man is defined by his actions" (to quote a previous post)

 

If people don't like what they see of me, knowing about AS is unlikely to change that impression, in fact it may even reinforce it.

[dm2010]

I am new to this forum and to the world of AS and I am SO thankful and priviledged that older people with AS are posting here.

 

My son is 8 and I so much want him to know that I am on his side but am still trying to find ways to let him know that I will always be there for him - I do tell him this, but I am not sure how much actually registers.

 

It gives me great comfort to hear from you all as it can be a very lonely road for the person with AS and for those who care - we are all on the same side, but this is not always obvious!

 

Keep posting!

 

x

 

Best way to tell an aspie you care - is . . . . don't ! It is deeds, not words that really register.

Far better to give them surprise treat(s) of something they really want, you may need to do some discreet research to find out what would be suitable. Perhaps something like :

 

"I've got some go-karting tickets, everything's arranged - we can be on the track in 20 minutes. And there's a large packed lunch <insert favourite foods here> already in the car to eat afterwards."

 

An aspie will look through that packed lunch in detail, noting that each item has been carefully selected and prepared to suit them. They will be deeply impressed that someone has gone to this trouble on their account, asking you questions about where it all came from and how long the food took to prepare.

[lindy2017]

Best way to tell an aspie you care - is . . . . don't ! It is deeds, not words that really register.

Far better to give them surprise treat(s) of something they really want, you may need to do some discreet research to find out what would be suitable. Perhaps something like :

 

"I've got some go-karting tickets, everything's arranged - we can be on the track in 20 minutes. And there's a large packed lunch <insert favourite foods here> already in the car to eat afterwards."

 

An aspie will look through that packed lunch in detail, noting that each item has been carefully selected and prepared to suit them. They will be deeply impressed that someone has gone to this trouble on their account, asking you questions about where it all came from and how long the food took to prepare.

hI,mY Son 11 years ols is like that asks loads of questions where are we going how far away who will be there etc.,......and looking through the food he is exactly like that .........lindy

[bid]

Best way to tell an aspie you care - is . . . . don't ! It is deeds, not words that really register.

Far better to give them surprise treat(s) of something they really want, you may need to do some discreet research to find out what would be suitable. Perhaps something like :

 

"I've got some go-karting tickets, everything's arranged - we can be on the track in 20 minutes. And there's a large packed lunch <insert favourite foods here> already in the car to eat afterwards."

 

An aspie will look through that packed lunch in detail, noting that each item has been carefully selected and prepared to suit them. They will be deeply impressed that someone has gone to this trouble on their account, asking you questions about where it all came from and how long the food took to prepare.

 

It's a lovely idea, but just a word of caution...when my son was 8, he would have needed far more than 20 minutes warning, even for something he loved doing! It may be better to start with a visual timetable, so that you can write down planned things, so that he has a chance to look at it as often as he wants to in order to establish what, and when, things are going to happen.

 

Even as an adult, surprises make me feel very agitated.

 

Bid

Edited March 2, 2011 by bid

[dm2010]

I don't like unpleasant surprises for sure.

 

But pleasant ones make my day and always have. Like the occasion when I had hired a Vauxhall Astra for a weekend . Got a phone call from the hire company on the Friday saying that they were terribly sorry, my booked car wasn't available and the only vehicle they had left was a Mercedes S-class, for the same money.

 

I was soooooooo disappointed obviously.

[Natterer]

Today, my Aspie daughter was in a ballet show with her sister. She came back from her class at 2.30 ish saying she needed to be at the theatre at 5 o'clock. Now that means we can't eat at our normal time. DD must be fed or will become impossible! So I think to myself, we could eat out (which both my girls love) at 4pm in town at a cafe or fish and chip shop or something and then wander over to the theatre. Now my husband never wants to watch the kids in the shows so I only have one ticket, but he could drive us into town, to save us having to find a space, eat with us, and then go home. So I tell my husband this plan. He jiggles his foot which means he doesn't like the idea. So I say, ok, you obviously don't like that idea, what's up? and he says 'nothing'. I say, "look, you look really annoyed at this suggestion, is there a problem with it? If there is, tell me now". He says nothing. I try again and say "this is your last chance, if there is a problem with this arrangement tell me what it is?". He says nothing. I am therefore pretty irritated when, at 4pm, he says he isn't coming with us and that *I knew that perfectly well from the conversation I had with him earlier*.

 

To me, that conversation meant that even if he didn't like the idea, he was coming. Well, we argued for about 20 minutes about it, he broke some things by kicking them, and then I had to give the kids sandwiches in order to get them to the theatre on time. He said he knew he was being irrational but it wasn't what he wanted to do and that he hadn't said that at the time becuase he knew it would make me cross. Which I obviously was anyway when it got to 4pm. GGGgggggRRRRRrrrrrrrrrr.

 

Anyway I am now wondering if he has aspergers too because he does that all the time, assumes I know things that he hasn't told me. And doesn't answer simple questions and then gets annoyed that I don't know what's happening. Or doesn't ask simple questions that would make life easier (like, "how much is that going to cost?" or "do you have to book at your restaurant or can you just turn up on the night?") and won't do things with the rest of us, a lot of the time. Just wants to do whatever he's interested in this week, by himself.

 

sorry just had to get that off my chest, I am FURIOUS! with him x

[dm2010]

Today, my Aspie daughter was in a ballet show with her sister. She came back from her class at 2.30 ish saying she needed to be at the theatre at 5 o'clock. Now that means we can't eat at our normal time. DD must be fed or will become impossible! So I think to myself, we could eat out (which both my girls love) at 4pm in town at a cafe or fish and chip shop or something and then wander over to the theatre. Now my husband never wants to watch the kids in the shows so I only have one ticket, but he could drive us into town, to save us having to find a space, eat with us, and then go home. So I tell my husband this plan. He jiggles his foot which means he doesn't like the idea. So I say, ok, you obviously don't like that idea, what's up? and he says 'nothing'. I say, "look, you look really annoyed at this suggestion, is there a problem with it? If there is, tell me now". He says nothing. I try again and say "this is your last chance, if there is a problem with this arrangement tell me what it is?". He says nothing. I am therefore pretty irritated when, at 4pm, he says he isn't coming with us and that *I knew that perfectly well from the conversation I had with him earlier*.

 

To me, that conversation meant that even if he didn't like the idea, he was coming. Well, we argued for about 20 minutes about it, he broke some things by kicking them, and then I had to give the kids sandwiches in order to get them to the theatre on time. He said he knew he was being irrational but it wasn't what he wanted to do and that he hadn't said that at the time becuase he knew it would make me cross. Which I obviously was anyway when it got to 4pm. GGGgggggRRRRRrrrrrrrrrr.

 

Anyway I am now wondering if he has aspergers too because he does that all the time, assumes I know things that he hasn't told me. And doesn't answer simple questions and then gets annoyed that I don't know what's happening. Or doesn't ask simple questions that would make life easier (like, "how much is that going to cost?" or "do you have to book at your restaurant or can you just turn up on the night?") and won't do things with the rest of us, a lot of the time. Just wants to do whatever he's interested in this week, by himself.

 

sorry just had to get that off my chest, I am FURIOUS! with him x

 

The technical term for this is being selfish.

And behaving badly too. Doesn't exclude the possibility of AS but I know plenty of individuals who don't have AS and do as they please regardless of everyone else.